Happy Thanksgiving y'all. I hope you all have something to be grateful for today and everyday. I'm definitely grateful for all the love this story has received so far. Keep it coming. Love.
The days had blurred together for the Chief Medical Examiner. One turning into the next, turning into a week, into a month. It'd been a month since she and Jane had reconstituted their friendship, and Maura was happy, blissfully happy. It was almost like they had never fought; things had almost gotten completely back to normal. They never did have that talk, but as the days passed, as more homicides came in and the two women seemed to return to some semblance of normal, Maura allowed it to fall to the wayside. Content merely to be with Jane, and ignore any lingering tensions.
The doctor had to admit that things had definitely changed. The two were more careful with one another, they tended to tiptoe around each other at the beginning of everyday, until they realized that neither was angry or leaving or rescinding on their friendship, and both would seem to sigh a huge breath of relief and would relax, until the next day.
Maura had even started hosting Rizzoli family dinners on Sunday nights again. Angela had been positively overjoyed to have her entire family back together again. Tommy and Frankie didn't really seem to mind much, neither mentioned Maura's three month hiatus. They just seemed happy to be able to watch whichever game was on that night on Maura's 52" plasma screen again. The whole reason Maura had purchased the television in the first place was with the Rizzoli's in mind, so she didn't care that they would walk in the door, kiss Mrs. Rizzoli hello, and plop down on the sofa, beers in hand. She was pleased simply to have been welcomed back into their lives, no hard feelings.
And Jane had been, well wonderful. She had become more protective of the ME after Maura's illness and witnessing the effects of Maura's nightmare, and the doctor had to admit that it was charming to be so well looked after. After the night when Maura had shown up at Jane's apartment in hysterics, the two women had slept in the same bed every single night. They hadn't planned for it to happen, but Jane had insisted for the first few days, and Maura had not had any desire to argue. And then, it seemed to become a habit. They would either go home together at the end of the day, or Jane would show up at Maura's door right before bedtime, pajamas in hand after a long shift.
They didn't talk about it. They never discussed the fact that it was strange or abnormal in any way. In fact, Maura had decided that it couldn't be that strange. It wasn't as if they were doing anything besides sleeping. It was purely plutonic. They didn't even cuddle or anything. Well, unless one of them, usually Maura, had a nightmare. In that instance, Maura would be woken up by Jane's soothing touch on her brow, her husky voice whispering reassuring nothings in the smaller woman's ear. And then Jane would wrap her arm around Maura's torso, and pull the blonde into herself so that all Maura could feel was Jane. Until Maura stopped shaking, and finally realized that Jane was still there, she wasn't going anywhere, it had simply been her unconscious playing tricks on her sleeping mind. The nightmares had been coming less frequently. There was a time when Maura would wake up two or three times a night: every time her body managed to enter the REM cycle, she would be jolted awake by the overwhelming sense of loss and loneliness. But now, it was only every other night or so, and she managed to fall back to sleep much faster, Jane always by her side.
Perhaps it was strange, and not something best friends did, but Maura didn't want to bring it up for fear that it would send Jane running for the hills. It was much better to just ignore it, to pretend that Jane had merely come over in the early morning when Angela Rizzoli would show up to make Maura breakfast. To pretend that they'd gone for a run in the morning together and that was why they carpooled to work now and then. It was much easier to simply pretend that nothing odd was going on. And the doctor had no desire to lose her nightly bed companion. She'd come to rely on Jane's presence in order to feel safe and sleep soundly. And she had to admit, at least to herself, that she enjoyed her body's physical reaction to Jane's touch. It was scary and nerve racking, trying to pretend that Jane's hand on her waist didn't cause a pit of warmth to develop in her core, that when Jane kissed her goodnight on the cheek or the top of her head, thinking Maura was already asleep, the ME didn't have to remind herself to continue taking deep slow breaths, to work to calm her elevated heart rate. It was difficult to control the wide smile that graced her features whenever Jane surprised her with lunch at the morgue or caught her eye across the café and gave her the signature Rizzoli grin. It was difficult, yes, to hide such things from the detective, but Maura was determined to let nothing get in the way of her friendship with the brunette. Not after what had happened with Doyle. Never again. Maura needed Jane. She was aware that the loss of Jane in any way would not inhibit her ability to breathe or her heart's ability to continue to circulate blood throughout her system, but she still felt a deep-seated need to have Jane nearby, to see her bright brown eyes at least once a day, even if it was just as the two dropped, exhausted into bed. It may have been illogical and emotional, but Maura felt that Jane was quickly becoming as important to her well-being as food.
Not to mention the fact that spending time with Jane seemed to lessen the tension within Maura's skull. The headaches never actually went away, not completely. There was always pressure behind her temples or at the base of her head. A pushing, pounding beat which took her attention away from whatever she was working on and caused her to feel faint if she stood too quickly. There was still that tightness in her brain which made her vision blurry and made her feel slightly nauseous if she tried to follow any fast movement too closely on the television. That pain was always there, but, when Jane was around, making Maura laugh or teasing the doctor about something or another, it was simply an annoyance, a gentle reminder that all was not well within the doctor's body.
Maura felt that she'd done a good job masking her symptoms whenever Jane was near. It wasn't that she didn't want Jane to know she was still feeling...ill, it was simply that Maura was well aware that whatever was going on, was becoming more serious every day the headaches persisted. And she didn't want to worry Jane unnecessarily. So, she had resolved to consult someone for a second opinion before speaking to the detective. That way, she would be prepared with all the facts. The doctor didn't consider it lying to Jane, simply withholding certain unnecessary information in order to protect the detective. Because Maura knew that Jane still felt guilty for the shooting in the warehouse, she herself still felt some residual guilt for her own actions, which was why, she believed, she was suffering from nightmares. And the way Jane dealt with her guilt, was by becoming extremely overprotective, but not so as to attract the attention of anyone else. There was no other explanation which the logical doctor could fathom for Jane's presence beside Maura in the bedroom every night otherwise. She just couldn't see any other reason for Jane's behavior. She couldn't.
So, she had resolved to protect Jane in the only way in which the detective would allow her to: by leaving her blissfully in the dark until she absolutely needed to be told something. It wasn't like Maura was keeping anything bad from Jane, simply a tidbit of information concerning Maura's own personal health. At least, that was what she told herself in order to maintain her perfectly healthy façade in front of the extremely observant detective.
At that moment, the doctor was eagerly awaiting the arrival of said detective. She had asked Jane if the brunette wanted the doctor to be in the courtroom that day while Jane was testifying, but the detective had waved her away, never one for allowing others to show their support of her. The doctor had been pleased when Jane seemed so certain that the perpetrator would be locked up for good by the end of the hearing. Never one for guessing, the doctor had merely trusted Jane's own gut instinct, even if they were merely intestines and incapable of predicting the future. But, when Jane had dropped her off at the BPD that morning and then headed, almost cheerily, off to the courthouse, Maura had wished her luck, and then spent the day in the morgue, anxiously awaiting a text from the detective.
She was surprised to notice that it was almost six in the evening when she checked her phone, shaking her head slightly to clear the fuzziness that was clouding her visionary spectrum. No new text messages. Maura hoped the detective would show up soon; court must have been adjourned for the day already. The doctor's headache had grown throughout the course of the day, as, with no new homicides called in, she had spent the day tied to her desk, going over old paperwork and case files, squinting to read the tiny type. She wanted Jane to come back to pick her up so they could head home, well, her home, and open a bottle of wine and sit on the couch, her feet in Jane's lap, head cushioned in a downy pillow, while she listened to the detective recount the events of her day, and Maura could allow Jane's raspy voice to tune out the aching of her own head.
Jane stepped off the elevator whistling, actually whistling. Her. Jane Rizzoli. Detective Jane Rizzoli. Whistling. Jesus Christ. She would have slapped her own self if she really cared. Which she didn't. Because she, Detective Jane Fucking Rizzoli had just testified in a done deal case and the perp was 99.9% surely going away for life for what he'd done. And she was riding high. The trial came on the heels of a string of successful cases. Normally, Jane hated spending the day in court, waiting for her turn to be called to the witness stand, but not today. No, today, she'd been a rockstar. At the top of her game. And that sick bastard was going to get what he deserved. So, she felt that she was entitled to a little whistling, a little joy.
She got off in the morgue as the elevator doors dinged open. She'd come straight down after getting back to BPD, wanting to tell Maura first, and in person. Maura, who would congratulate Jane on a case well done, who was always Jane's biggest supporter. It'd been a tough case, but they'd caught the bastard and now he was going to pay, and Jane wanted to celebrate. With Maura. She didn't know what it was, but this past month had been...amazing. And amazing was not an adjective that was normally in the detective's sarcastic vocabulary.
She and Maura were fine. Better than fine. They were great! They were closer than ever. Sure there was the whole, stomach fluttering thing whenever Maura walked into a room, or extra warmth that spread throughout Jane's body whenever she and the ME shared any form of physical contact, and sure, those things made Jane feel a little awkward and uncomfortable and unsure. But the detective usually tried to push those feelings, or whatever they were, out of her head as soon as possible, and, other than that, things were...awesome. There she went again, using those weird words that were completely out of character for her.
Jane didn't care. She and Maura were going to go out to the Robber tonight in celebration, maybe she would even be able to convince Maura to get a burger instead of one of those nasty salads. Maura had seemed hesitant to go out lately, citing tiredness too often for Jane's comfort, but not tonight. No. Tonight, they were going to drink, beer for Jane and wine for the doctor, and then they were going to go back to Maura's house, where Jane had practically moved in, and they would relax on the couch and watch tv and revel in the fact that sometimes the good guys really do come out on top. Sometimes good can triumph over evil. Damn. It felt good to be a cop today.
She rapped smartly on the ME's office door, bouncing on the balls of her feet and not even trying to contain the wide grin on her face. Maura looked up and smiled at the overeager detective. Jane felt her grin grow wider. The blonde was looking absolutely ravishing. No, that wasn't an appropriate friend comment to make, so instead, "Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes," Jane joked.
Maura quirked an eyebrow at her and Jane smirked. The medical examiner was just so damn cute. And, Jane was riding high, so she didn't even care when she amended her statement to, "And cute as always." She managed not to notice the slight blush which spread across the ME's features at her words. Jane's brown eyes flicked up and down the doctor's form as Maura stood and reached for her coat lying on the chair nearby. She noticed the way Maura was trembling just the slightest bit and trying to hide it. She knew the doctor was keeping something from her, that Maura hadn't regained the weight she'd lost while the two were estranged like she should have. That she was still getting random headaches, even if she didn't want the detective to know. Jane knew. Of course. But now was not the appropriate time to bring it up.
"We did it, Maur!" Jane couldn't contain her excitement. "That sick fuc-man, excuse me, is going to rot in jail for the rest of his miserable life."
Maura beamed proudly at the detective and Jane couldn't help herself from puffing out her chest just a bit. "Congratulations, Jane. I take it court went well?"
"Swimmingly." What an un-Jane-like thing to say. But the detective didn't care. "I was going to text you, but I figured it'd be better to hear it in person. I thought we might go to the Dirty Robber for drinks. Frost and Korsak said they'd come, and Frankie, once he gets off. A little celebration dinner?"
Maura's face fell infintesimally at the suggestion, but she pulled her grin back into place almost immediately. "Certainly."
Jane had seen it though, the hesitation, and it immediately put a damper on her mood. "We don't have to, Maur. I just thought it might be fun. You haven't been out in such a while."
Maura walked over to her, bag slung on her arm, her face looking slightly guilty. "I'm sorry, Jane. Of course I want to go out with you all tonight. I'm very happy for you."
"Well, we couldn't have done it without you, Maur. You know that." Jane slung her arm over the ME's shoulder without a second thought, steering her out of the morgue before Maura could change her mind. "We won't stay too late, okay? I promise."
Maura nodded. "Alright."
As the two climbed into the elevator, Jane punched the button for Homicide. "I've gotta stop by my desk real quick and grab a couple things. Then we can go. Is that alright?"
"Alright. So, tell me about court," Maura urged.
It was all Jane needed, and she immediately launched into a description of the courtroom scene of the day, taking care to include certain details that she knew Maura would be interested in. Jane noticed the way lines of tension seemed to disappear from the doctor's face as the elevator went higher, pleased she was helping the ME relax after a day at work.
The two women stepped out of the elevator and rounded the corner towards Jane's desk. Maura was laughing at a joke Jane had just made about the defendant's attorney, and Jane was facing her, gesturing with her hands to describe the man's ridiculous tendencies. Jane was basking in the ME's attention, practically glowing with the thought of a successful day and the booth awaiting them at the Robber, when all of sudden, Maura froze, the grin wiped cleanly off her face in a split second, and her face paled considerably.
"Maur?" Jane spun immediately, looking in the direction of Maura's gaze, attempting to discern what had caused the sudden reaction in her face. Her eyes lit on the figure standing beside her desk. Her face tightened into a mask of anger, her eyes going from relaxed and laughing to furious in a single second as the man turned to face the two of them.
"Dean. What in the hell are you doing here?"