Rating: M

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.

Thanks to LovinRob for beta'ing – she smacked it up, flipped it and rubbed it down.
Thanks to Carrie ZM for doin' me… the honor of pre-reading this crazy fic.
Thanks to AmandaC3 for the fantastic banner.
And to the Triangle of Curls Girls for all of the encouragement.

Don't forget to use your best Boston accent.

Chapter 3 - Complications

April 19, 2013
9:45 AM EDT
Boston, MA

"Well, I mean. If you wanna get technical about it, he's a New Yorker… born and bred, ya know. And a Yankee fan."

It takes everything in me not to tell her that if she wants to get technical about it, he's just an asshole. I can't call him that though, it'd be like calling her kid an asshole, which would be...bad.

"I am so sorry about this, Edward. Here, let me wash these for you," she says as she grabs my piss-soaked clothes from me and makes her way to my steaming turd filled Sox cap.

"Don't worry about the hat, just throw it away." I say as I give her pleased looking pooch a dirty look.

I feel like we should have a burial and small service for it in her backyard, play taps for the fallen or something equally poetic. But I refuse to give that little shit the opportunity or the satisfaction of desecrating my hat on a daily basis. As I'm thinking on this, I notice she's only wearing a small tank top and some barely there panties as she passes me. This reminds me that I am bare-ass naked, cupping my junk, and that a SWAT team is gonna come sweeping through the premises in a matter of minutes.

"Bella, come on. I'm serious. We gotta get dressed." I tell her urgently as I follow her to the bathroom.

"Why?" She asks through a yawn as she flushes Jake's parting gift to me.

I need for her to understand so I grab her shoulders and turn her to look out the window at the advancing SWAT team.

"The city is on lock-down. SWAT is goin' door-to-door looking for a suspect. Rose said that shit got real last night. There was a shoot-out, a car chase, I don't know. I think a cop was gunned down or something. I didn't catch everything she said."

I feel her tremble a bit and I doubt it's because she's cold. She just nods and whispers 'okay' as she walks out of the room. I hear dresser drawers opening and closing, then the distinct sounds of a magazine being ejected from a gun. I round the corner just in time to see her inserting the ammo before pushing the mag up until it locks with a click.

"Whoa, Cookie – what'cha got goin' on there?" I ask as I lean against her doorway.

Truthfully, the sight of a girl handling a gun as well as she does registers two types of responses with me. My head is sounding off the warning bells, letting me know that this chick might be a little more hardcore than I can handle. Then there is the response that comes straight from my dick who finds the madness a bit appealing. As a matter of fact, he is rising to the occasion as we speak. He's probably jerkin' his chin at her like Joey from Friends sayin' 'how you doin'.

"Just in case. You never know," she says with a shrug, as if it's no big deal that she just loaded a gun all precise like fuckin' Forrest Gump and shit.

"Do you even know how to shoot that thing?"

I realize my mistake the minute the words tumble out of my mouth. The looks she gives me is both incredulous and scary. Eyebrows aren't meant to go that high on foreheads.

"I just mean, have you been trained? Uh, you know, to use a gun, properly."

Her eyes return to the gun and she makes sure the safety is on before she places it gently back in the drawer.

"Edward, my father is a police chief. I am his only daughter and only child. I am basically the best son he's ever had. I've been shooting guns longer than you've been getting the girls to drop their panties," she finishes with her arms across her chest.

"So that's a yes?" I ask ignoring her assumption.

"That's a yes," she says with a smirk. "Now let's get you some clothes." She goes into her closet and comes out with an opened, oversized envelope and tosses it at me. "This should fit you."

"You gotta be kiddin' me!" I say as I pull out a gigantic Yankee's jersey. It has to be at least a 4X. "I can't wear this."

"What? It's the only male clothing I have. My ex insisted that Jake would want a keepsake to remember him by, something with his scent. I've been meaning to mail it back to him."

"First of all, it's a Yankee's jersey, I'd rather answer the door with a sock over my dick." I tell her as I toss the shirt back at her. "And secondly, that thing is fuckin' huge. What are you some kinda' chubby chaser?"

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head as she stuffs the offensive shirt back in its envelope. She mutters something under her breath, but I only catch the last portion. Something about 'he wasn't chubby'.

"You got any other options?"

"Just one," she says as she pulls out a light pink fluffy bathrobe. "It's this or the Yankee's shirt."

I pretend not to notice her smirk as I war with myself. Which one will win out, my manhood or my city pride? On one hand, there is a chance I could get shot just for wearing a Yankee shirt in this neighborhood. On the other, what kind of self-respecting man wears a fluffy robe with the word pink across the ass in all caps? A loud rapping on the door makes my decision for me as I grab the robe and put it on.

"Just a second." I say loudly as I tie the belt and pick-up a barking, snarling Jake. "Quiet down, you!"

I notice Bella following me pulling up a pair of the shortest shorts I've ever seen in my life.

"Ungh-uh! Nope." I say shaking my head and pointing back to her bedroom. "Go put on some clothes."

It seems that I was wrong before, it is possible for eyebrows to go higher on a forehead.

"Come on, seriously. If they make us go outside, you want your father to see you on CNN dressed like that?" I soften my tone, hoping to reason with the crazy by throwing down the daddy card.

Thankfully she relents with an annoyed sigh, a stomp off and the slamming of her bedroom door. I'm sure I will hear about it later – it looks like we'll be spending lots of time together today.

Just as I grab the doorknob, they start knocking again, causing Jake to get even crazier in my arms.

I open the door to four men in head-to-toe black gear with assault weapons lowered, but poised to aim if necessary. I motion for them to come in and open the door all the way.

"Sir, we're searching the neighborhood for a suspect. Have you seen anything or anyone in or around the premises?"

I shake my head no. "The only ones here are me and my-" I pause as I try to find the correct word to finish the sentence. My what? Acquaintance? Friend with benefits? Fuck-buddy? I clear my throat. "Uh, me and my girl. She's uh, getting dressed. She'll be out in a minute."

My girl? What is that all about? I ask myself as Bella comes out of the bedroom in a hoodie and pajama pants. She's also wearin' a smirk that tells me that she heard me.

Bella takes it from here, answering all the questions he asks as the other officers peek into each room. I don't miss it when they side-eye me on their way out while they try not to snicker at what I'm wearing. I can't even imagine how I look to them with my short little pink robe and petting this tiny tea-cup dog like Dr. Evil and shit. A part of me wants to yell that it was this or a Yankee's jersey, but I think I already look pathetic enough.

She shuts the door quietly and looks at me strangely. I wonder if she's uncomfortable or embarrassed. As if the morning after isn't awkward enough.

"Do you mind if I turn on the TV?" I say, motioning for her remote.

"Uh no, that's probably a good idea."

We sit in silence and watch the coverage as they discuss the events leading up to the citywide lockdown. Bella's leg is bouncing nervously as she watches. After about an hour, she is unable to take any more.

"I'm going to take a shower and then I'll make us some breakfast or brunch or whatever," she says as she pulls at her sleeve nervously. "I, uh. I think I have an extra toothbrush and you can shower when I'm done…if you want."

"Yeah, that'd be great, thanks."

I put Jake down so I can stand up and stretch a bit. I hear her humming as she starts up the water. It's strange how she and I are in our own little bubble. I feel anxious again as I look out her living room window. The streets are now empty. Everyone is looking out their windows, keeping their eyes peeled for any suspicious activity. We're all on our own now. He could be anywhere.

I hear my phone chime with an incoming text. I don't find it remotely surprising that it's my mother urgently requesting that I call her. I notice that she's left six messages and four texts. I need to get this over with so I dial her number. Cue the drama in 3…2…1...

"Hello."

"Hi Ma." I say sheepishly and pull the phone from my ear as she starts in immediately.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Edward! Where are you? I had your neighbor Mrs. Cope bangin' on your door and you don't answer. You're gonna give me and your fath-ah a heart-attack."

"Ma, come on. I'm fine. I crashed at a friend's house." I say as I pinch the bridge of my nose because the sound of her voice is making my head pound again.

"What friend?" You aren't with Emmett and Rosalie. Your sister says she hasn't seen you since Tuesday. Where are you?"

"Don't worry, Ma. I'm safe. Everything is fine." I try to reassure her as I notice Bella coming out of the bathroom. I put my finger over my lips to tell her to keep quiet, but she misses it.

"Shower's all yours." Bella says as she towels her hair.

"Who's that?" Mom asks and I swear to God she has supersonic hearing.

"Nothin' ma, just the TV."

"No. You're watchin' CNN because it sounds like it's in stereo. Edward, who are you with?"

Bella mouths the word sorry to me as it dawns on her that my mom is giving me the third degree.

"What's her name? Is she your girlfriend? Did you meet her at the St. Paul's singles night I told you about?"

"Ma, listen, we aren't supposed to be on the phone. I'm safe and I'll call you once the lockdown is over, alright?"

"Edward, wait. What's her –"

"Bye Ma!" I yell over her and end the call.

Bella is smiling as she comes towards me with a bottle of water and some Tylenol. "Sorry about that, I didn't see that you were on the phone."

"It's alright, no worries. She's just a bit of a ball-buster." I explain with a shrug.

She snorts and drops the pills into my hand. "Trust me, my dad is the same way."

"I can imagine."

The awkwardness subsides for a moment as we eye each other. Most chicks don't look this good in the morning. Even without make-up and her hair soakin' wet, she still looks like a stunner. Those eyes are somethin' else, too. She blushes and looks away.

"I put out some clean towels and a toothbrush for you," she says quickly, nervously twisting a few strands of her hair. "So, if you want to uh," she motions towards the bathroom. "Shower or whatever, you can."

"Thanks Cookie." I say sincerely, heading to the bathroom, not wanting to make her uncomfortable.

The steam and heat from the shower feels wonderful on my skin. I take my time, trying to wrap my head around everything. One-night stands are not my thing. I think Bella may be operating under the assumption that I'm a player of some sort, and if that's the case, I need to rectify that shit real quick. I can only think of one time that I did the whole wham, bam, thank-you ma'am thing when Em and I visited Rosalie at school during our freshman year of college. Drinking too much booze, poor judgment, and Rose and Em placing a sock on the doorknob of her dorm room was the perfect storm for me ending up in Bree Tanner's room. I am not 100% sure, but I think she was Rose's Resident Adviser. I remember the awkward hug in the morning and the promise to keep in touch. I think I avoided calling Rose for weeks, worried that Bree would be in the room wanting to know why I hadn't called.

So far, Bella seems great. Wicked cool, mad sexy, funny and cute as hell. She also has a bit of the crazy vibe, especially with the whole full metal jacket routine with the gun and all. I kinda dig it. I can't get a feel for her though, the girl gives nothing away. Hell, she may be countin' the minutes until she gets me outta her hair for all I know.

I shut off the water and towel off in the shower, careful not to make a mess. It looks like Cookie has a tinge of OCD from the evenly spaced bottles in the shower to the folded edges of her toilet paper. I take a look at myself in her full length mirror as I tie the belt to this ridiculous robe. If Em or Riley could see me now, I'd surely never live it down.

As I step into the kitchen, I see Bella flipping eggs into the frying pan. She grins at me over her shoulder, looking adorable with her hair piled on top of her head and her shorty-shorts back in full effect. Pretty sure I hit the jackpot 'cause she's cooking the eggs in bacon grease, old school like my mom does it.

"Over easy eggs okay with you or do you like scrambled?"

"Over easy is great. You uh, need me to do anything?"

She shakes her head. "Nope, have a seat. Do you want coffee or juice?"

"Coffee sounds good. Just black."

I notice Jake is waiting patiently by his food dish like he's expecting something more than just kibbles and bits.

"It's not Dunkies, but I think it tastes pretty good," she says as she places a large cup of coffee in front of me.

"Thanks."

She's right. It's delicious. And so is she as she works around the kitchen humming and buttering the English muffins. I don't miss it when she bends over and grabs Jake's bowl without bending her knees. God bless those shorts.

"Now Jake, today you get egg whites only and no cheese. Little guys who go potty in the house don't get cheese."

She has her back to us, so she doesn't see it it when I nod and glare condescendingly at her little guy. I can't be sure, but I think he raised his paw at me, and possibly flipped me off. I must still be drunk but I feel like justice has been served. Enjoy your egg whites ya little shit.

"And these are for you." She says and places a full plate of eggs, bacon and English muffins in front of me.

"Wow, this looks amazing."

She shrugs off the compliment and sits down to eat her breakfast. She's got a full plate as well and I am glad to see that she isn't one of those chicks who eats a Triscuit with a dollop of Nutella, calls it a meal and complains about what a pig she is.

We eat breakfast in total silence and just awkwardly smile at each other when we happen to make eye contact. I'm starting to realize that my game is just as weak as Riley's, which is sad 'cause that kid is a stroke.

"I put your clothes in the washer and emptied your pockets. Your wallet and keys are up there." She tells me as she points to the island we defiled last night.

I smirk when I look at the island and remember how she looked spread out for me. I notice that she is trying to hide a shy smile of her own behind her juice glass.

"Thanks for doing that, Cookie. Let me get the dishes."

"Oh no. No, no, no. You sit down. You're my… guest." She says it, but it sounds more like a question.

"Fine, you wash and I'll dry." I tell her bringing my dishes to the sink.

I'm a little disappointed that we work in relative silence as well except for the occasional 'here' and 'thanks' as she hands off the dishes to me.

"So are you a Yankee's fan, too? Like Jake?"

She shakes her head and giggles a bit. "No, my father would disown me. Seriously, it's bad enough that I dated and lived with one for years. If I turned my back on the Sox, my dad would shit twice and die."

"Do you miss New York? Livin' in the city?"

"Nah. I don't know. I was never really into it. Like the first few months it was exciting just learning the city and going out, but eventually it became more of a pain in the ass than anything," she says casually while roughly scraping the egg off the plate she's washing. "Like the commute was excruciating and we didn't have a car. I don't know. I don't like to bitch about it, but Manhattan was always Felix's dream so, you know. I just tried to grin and bear it as long as I could."

"Felix?"

"My ex," she says nodding still focused on that same plate.

"Who names their kid Felix?"

She laughs and rinses the plate before handing it to me. She gets quiet for a minute and I don't want that. I want to keep her talking, to tell me more.

"How long have you been back in Boston?"

"About three months. I just needed a change and had no desire to stay in New York any longer. I didn't want to go back to Bradford so I came here." She pauses slightly as she scrubs her juice glass and huffs. "You know what, I take back my previous statement. There is one thing I miss about New York. I miss Sprinkles cupcakes." I look at her like she is crazy until she continues. "Felix is a physical trainer so we only could have very specific things, no dairy, no bread, no sweets – basically nothing tasty. So every Friday, I'd secretly go to Sprinkles after work and treat myself to one giant cupcake, my one indulgence for the entire week."

She kinda stares off into space like she's reliving some flashback.

"One Friday afternoon, he surprised me at my office so I couldn't have my indulgence for the week. I think that's when I knew that we weren't going to work."

"So wait. You broke up because you couldn't have cupcakes?" I ask confused.

"No," she says a bit flustered. "I think the cupcake was like a metaphor or something. What I wanted was never in the equation. Whenever we spoke about the future it was always about the gym he was going to open, or the race he wanted us to run or whatever he was into that week. When I told him that I'd like to have kids and a house with a yard someday, he kind of blew me off. When it came up again, he went out and bought me Jake to appease me for the time being or something. And I know, I know. I should've spoken up, but I don't know if it would've done any good, ya know?"

I don't know, but I nod my head reassuringly anyway.

"Either way, I am trying to be more uh… assertive these days." She teases and bumps me with her hip trying to lighten the mood as she hands off the juice glass which slips from my grip and crashes to the floor.

"SHIT!" She yells and bends down to clean up the glass before Jake can get into it.

I try to tell her to stop and let me get it, but it's too late. I see the blood and hear her curse before I even have a chance to get down there. She's got blood running down her finger and she looks like she's gonna pass out. Jake is barking and growling as I try to shoo him away from the glass.

"Come here, Cookie." I tell her as I pick her up and place her on the countertop. "Let me see that."

She scoots back onto the counter and shows me her finger. She has a good-size shard hanging out.

"Alright, don't move. Where's your first aid kit?"

"Bathroom. Bottom shelf in the linen closet on the right hand side."

I scoop up Jake and put him in his crate and grab the kit from the bathroom.

"Okay, lemme see." I say as I take her hand in mine and I notice she is trembling. "You squeamish about blood?"

She nods, still looking away. "Distract me. Tell me a story."

"What do ya wanna know?"

"How did you and Rose become such good friends?"

Great another opportunity for me to look like a pussy.

"We met in eighth grade. It was after school and she was waiting for her ride. Royce King was messin' with her, tryin' to look up her skirt or something perverted. Either way, I was feelin' froggy so I stepped to him, threw a punch and missed." I say as I clean around the wound, trying to get a good look at it. "He threw a punch too, caught me in the mouth." I tell her with a chuckle. "So there I am on the ground, lip all swollen and shit. Next thing I know, Royce is lying right next to me holdin' his eye, bawling his face off."

"Did Emmett punch him?"

"Nope. Em didn't come into the picture until our junior year." I explain as I pull the tweezers from the kit. "Rose dropped him with one punch. It was awesome. She helped me up, dusted me off, and taught me to throw a punch later that week. We've been best friends ever since."

She's watching me closely, smiling and wincing at the same time. "Uh, how did Rose and Emmett hook-up?"

"Take a deep breath for me on three, Cookie." I say as I grab the shard with the tweezers. "One… two… three." She sucks the air between her teeth as I pull out the glass. "You alright?"

"Yeah," she nods and bites her lip.

"When Rose and I were juniors, Rose decided that Royce wasn't a douche-bag anymore and dated him." I shake my head and roll my eyes 'cause it still aggravates me to this day that she didn't listen to me. "I'd like the record to show that I didn't approve. He got rough with her at a party, I don't know. I wasn't there. But Em was and he put that kid in the hospital."

"Aww, so it was like love at first sight?"

"Uhhhh…. No." I say with a laugh. "This is gonna sting a bit." I tell her as I clean the wound itself. "He chased her for six months before she agreed to go on a date with him. He's a year younger than us and she thought she was too cool. But she came around, eventually."

I work in silence for the next few minutes as I place the gauze on the cut and wrap the bandage around it. I can feel her eyes on me and I see her tongue running back and forth on her bottom lip. I wet mine too just in case.

"You're really good at that." She says, just above a whisper.

I meet her eyes with a crooked smirk and lift the tip of her injured finger to my lips, before pecking it softly.

"I'm good at a lot of things, Cookie."

A/N: Will they or won't they? How long and how far will I take the awkwardness? Your guess is as good as mine, pals.

Don't forget to check out my pal Blueissoul's take on the article in her hot fic One Night Stand in Lock-down London. Not for nuthin', dolls – but her cocky Londonward has some serious panty ruining potential.

Tonight, instead of our usual Let It WIP recs, I am going to give a shout out to some new authors who are popping their fanfic writing cherry. I had a wonderful experience as a first-time writer in the fandom and I would love it if you guys would help me pay it forward by supporting and encouraging the talents of these new fanfic writers.

Who knows, these new authors may someday be your old faves. Without further ado, here are the Like A Virgin fic recs:

All The Mistakes – bpik
Dress You Up – MazzyStarla
Where I Belong – cravingMOREplz

Thanks so much to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed fav'd, pimped, tweeted, and lurked this fic! I appreciate it so much! See you all next Thursday.