This is a lot darker than what I've written in the past. It's inspired by Dog Sees God, a play by Bert V Royal- it's really amazing and totally worth reading. The characters are based off them, and some events, but I take things a little farther than in the play.
A few warnings: sex, rape, drug use, swearing, homophobia, mentions of past violence, thoughts of suicide. Nothing explicit, though. Just heavily implied.
I've been having a really rough summer, and I just needed to get some emotions out. This was the result.
Dear fucking Diary,
So many things in my life suck. And I apparently have issues dealing with problems, so I was forced to get you. Mom thought it might help. She didn't want to pay for a therapist. A journal is much cheaper. God, I feel like such a pussy. This is retarded.
Bye
Blaine and Sebastian swaggered down the hallway with an air of confidence only gained from the fear and torment of others. Some looked upon them as Gods- others thought of them as the scum of the earth, but they would never dare express that opinion. One thing was certain: the two boys were untouchable.
"Hey, boys," a voice purred from behind them. "Are you coming to my party this weekend?" Sebastian looked over his shoulder to see Quinn in her cheerleading uniform- short skirt and tight top- biting her lip enticingly.
The two boys glanced at each other. Sebastian shrugged his shoulders, attempting to appear nonchalant. All three teenagers knew Blaine and Sebastian would be at the party; they simply had to go through the formalities expected of them. "Maybe we'll make an appearance." Quinn grinned seductively and ran a hand down each boy's shoulder.
"I'll make it worth your while. We'll have a private after party afterwards, just the three of us." With a dirty wink, she turned down the hall, swinging her hips back and forth. She knew Blaine and Sebastian would be watching- they always watched.
"Score." Sebastian laughed, and the two fist- bumped at the promise of sex.
Kurt scrambled out of the locker room after gym without even changing out of his hideous uniform. He could not stand being around his tormentors a second longer than necessary, especially in their natural habitat, their home turf.
He had been kicked and punched in there. The jocks tried to beat the gay out of him. They shoved his head in toilets and flushed, temporarily drowning him. They pushed him into lockers, bruising his body, making him dizzy, nearly giving him concussions. Those who did not participate in hurting him stood and watched it happen. Kurt hated them the most; they watched Kurt die piece by piece and did nothing; they did not stand up for him; they did not go to a teacher; they watched Kurt wither away into a shell of his former self.
Kurt would much rather change in a girl's bathroom than in the locker room- at least he was safe from being physically hurt there. The girls always said nasty things about him, but it was better than having a black eye.
Dear fucking Diary,
I just really want to punch someone or burn something. I could burn you, but.. then I couldn't write in you. So fuck that. God, this just sounds like one giant innuendo—I'm always "in you" and shit. Whatever.
There's a party this weekend. This hot girl invited me and my bro to go. I guess we're gonna have a threesome. We've done it before. Dunno why I'm so excited.
It's so gay.
Bye
Kurt let the music consume him, overwhelm him, flood his senses entirely. He listened to the piano recording play, took a deep, calm breath and sang. He released everything within him. He poured his heart, his soul, his entire being into the song. Kurt shut his eyes as emotions rushed through him, filling him, and then escaping. Tears ran down his cheeks at a steady yet rapid pace that nearly doubled the tempo of the song.
The music tinkered off and the recording died down. The song came to an end. Kurt felt relieved, and at the same time sad. His eyes ached, and his a steady pounding began in his head.
"That was beautiful." A voice came from the doorway behind him. Kurt tensed immediately. No one was meant to hear him. That was private. It was all him- it was his soul- his heart. He turned around slowly, seeing exactly to whom he had accidently revealed himself.
Blaine.
Kurt must have said the boy's name out loud without realizing it, for the boy nodded sheepishly, wincing slightly at Kurt's glare.
"That's my name- don't wear it out!" He chuckled, attempting to be cute. Kurt simply stared at him, silently willing one of his biggest tormentors to leave. He could not believe what had just happened.
"You're a nice singer." Blaine stated pathetically. He took a step forward, not truly knowing what his own intention was. Kurt flew backwards, behind the grand piano in the middle of the choir room.
"Don't touch me!" He stuttered defensively.
"I'm not going to touch you!" Blaine raised his voice in exasperation. Kurt acted like Blaine was going to kill him or something- it was ridiculous. Kurt raised a single eyebrow at Blaine's tone and words.
"Am I supposed to know that from experience?" He questioned skeptically. Blaine crossed his arms, protecting himself from an unknown, non-existent threat.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Do you know how many times I've come home from school- where people should be safe from harm and protected from the horrors of the world- with bruises covering my body because of you and your friends?! Just the other day Seba.. Seb.. your friend punched me in the face for being a "fucking fag"! I don't even know if I like boys!" Kurt crumpled onto the piano bench and pressed his heated face onto the cool piano.
Blaine waited for Kurt to lift his head back up before replying.
"I didn't do anything!" Blaine yelled at the boy. He felt as though he had a wildly high fever raging through his system, and when he looked at Kurt, the boy seemed terrified. "It was all Sebastian." He continued in a calmer tone. Kurt glared daggers at Blaine, and each moment left Blaine feeling as though Kurt was piercing further and further into his heart.
"You stood and watched them beat me. With words. With fists. With feet. With sporting equipment." Kurt took a breath. "You never joined in, but you never stopped it. And you were always there. And that- is so much worse. You could have helped me! You could have called a teacher! You could have stood up for me, damn it!" He filled his voice with as much malice as he possibly could as he delivered his speech- condemning Blaine forever as damned in his mind. But he was exhausted. The lunch block had been far too over emotional for him. "Get out." Blaine continued standing where he was, absolutely speechless. "Get out!" Kurt screamed, shutting his eyes as tears burned them, before slamming his head down on the piano. He could hear the sound of Blaine scrambling out the door.
He did not know whether he was relieved or just wanted to throw up.
"I'm so excited for my party this weekend. It's going to be such a rager!" Quinn gushed excitedly. Santana and Brittany nodded enthusiastically, pretending they had not already had that exact conversation three times already that day.
"All the cutest boys, all the best booze. It'll be great, Quinnie." Santana sucked up to the head cheerleader with a huge smile.
"Why are you worried about boys?" Brittany asked Santana directly, tilting her head. "What about what we talked about last night in your-"
"Anyway! Are Blaine and Sebastian coming?" Santana asked quickly, covering up the remainder of Brittany's question. Quinn smiled smugly and flipped her hair in the other girls' direction.
"Of course they're coming! It's my party. Let's be real. Why wouldn't they be there?" She laughed as though she had said the funniest thing she had ever heard.
"You think Sebastian likes me?" Santana questioned her friend in a whisper, hoping Brittany- who was trailing behind them staring off into space and humming- would not hear them. Quinn digested the question and weighed the pros and cons of lying. She decided lying would be better for her well-being before plastering on a smile.
"Oh yeah! Of course he does!" She nodded vigorously and put her arm on Santana's shoulder. "You can have Sebastian, and I'll take Blaine. We'll be the power couples of the school!"
"Who do I get, then?" Brittany's voice came from behind them. Quinn and Santana glanced at each other quickly before coming to a silent consensus.
"Puck."
Sebastian stood behind Blaine for football warm- ups just as he had every day since they started in community recreation games. Stretches were Sebastian's favorite part of practices, for many reasons.
"Hey, Seb.." Blaine got his friend's attention as they stretched. He winced as a muscle in his leg began to ache.
"Yeah, dude?" He received a distracted reply from behind him.
"Why're you so hard on Hummel?" Blaine knew it was a weird question. He knew the implications of his question. He just hoped Sebastian- as his friend- would not call him out on it.
It was a while before he got a reply from his friend. It was such a long time, in fact, that Blaine had almost forgotten what he had asked.
"Fags need to be taught their lesson."
"But-" Blaine tried to protest. Tried to do right by Kurt.
"Why, Blaine? Are you a fag?" Sebastian pulled out of his stretch and grabbed Blaine by the shoulders roughly. He pulled himself up to his full height before trying to intimidate and overwhelm Blaine with it.
And there it was. The accusation Blaine had been hoping to avoid. He shook his head rapidly and laughed, ignoring his friend's threatening body language. He pushed Sebastian's hands off of him and waved everyone- who had been hoping, watching, and waiting for them to fight- to go back to their stretches.
"'course not." Blaine mumbled. "I hate fags." He cringed; the sentence tasted disgusting in his mouth; it physically ached him to say those words. Blaine felt sick for the remainder of practice.
Dear fucking Diary,
I think I'm a fag.
"Do you remember when we were all in men's choir together?" Kurt asked Blaine softly as they sat together on the piano bench. They were the first words spoken since their last interaction. Blaine was surprised Kurt had let him sit so close- it was rather intimate.
Blaine nodded. He remembered it more than he cared to admit to anyone but Kurt.
"We all had so much fun." Blaine said. "The Lowe Tones or something like that? Cuz our teacher's name was Mr. Lowe and we were only in Middle School, so none of us could hit the low notes. Pretty punny!" Blaine lightly hit Kurt's shoulder with his own. Kurt smiled at him- a small smile- but a smile nonetheless. It was bitter sweet, but not any less beautiful.
"People didn't hit me then. They thought I was cool cuz I got all the solos. And I was good." Kurt paused. "It was before people knew what a fag was. Before queer. Before everyone got so big.." Kurt shuddered violently.
Blaine longed to put his arm around the boy, but there were a million reasons he could not. Kurt would get upset. People might see. Then people would talk. There would be rumors. Or, Kurt could like it. And there would be closer touching. Then people would see and there would be rumors. Either way, it would not end well. Blaine did not put his arm around Kurt.
"What happened to that?" Kurt asked no one in specific, his voice laced with so much pain Blaine's chest ached. "We all used to be friends, Blaine! People never even thought about me liking boys.. if I even do.. It's not like I know- I've never had sex. But they hadn't even thought of it, cared about it. They only thought it was cool that I could sing. I was a part of a group, a really important group, a cool group. I had friends, people who seemed to care. But those same people beat me on a regular basis, and I now know why people kill themselves or come to school with guns and shoot other people down." Kurt gasped, not believing he had uttered those words. "I didn't mean that.."
"Yes you did." Blaine watched as Kurt curled in on himself, shaking violently. He hugged his legs up to his chest, attempting to make himself small, attempting to provide himself with some comfort.
"I just.. need love. Physical affection, you know? A person can't live when they're slowly being killed by others. If that makes any sense at all. It doesn't does it?" A single tear slid down the boy's cheek. Blaine stared at Kurt in awe. Even crying, Blaine could not deny Kurt was beautiful. "God, life is so fucking messed up."
Blaine nodded his head and rested it slowly, tenderly, on Kurt's shoulder. Kurt gasped quietly when Blaine's cheek touched the bare skin of his shoulder where his shirt had slipped down; he felt chills; he felt electric; he felt alive.
"Kiss me." Kurt blurted. Blaine tensed where he was, head on Kurt's shoulder, hands in his own lap but itching to travel. His head lifted as though labored with a great weight, and he came to look Kurt deep in the eyes.
Before suddenly their lips were crashing together, tongues diving into each other's mouths with absolutely no finesse. Hands grabbed and groped at bodies, feeling, touching, taking. They ignited each other, quickly melting with all the overwhelming feelings.
And then all the heat and joy and pressure and relief was gone. Blaine looked panicked, and tore out of the room without another word or another glance at the broken boy he left behind.
"Woah. Guys. Does the school look purple to you?" Quinn, Santana, Brittany, Blaine, and Sebastian all turned to stare at Puck who had stood up at the lunch table, looking around the cafeteria in amazement.
"No. Maybe you should take of those sunglasses, retard." Santana said, bits of muffin falling out of her mouth. Brittany tilted her head to the side and looked up at the ceiling questioningly.
"It does look rather purple to me." Santana rubbed her shoulder. "Purple is a nice color. I just wish everything was sparkly, too. That would be even nicer." Quinn snorted from her spot beside Santana.
"Maybe you guys should stop doing drugs. Y'all are seriously fucked up." Blaine shifted uncomfortably in his seat across from Quinn as Sebastian nodded pointedly in agreement with her words.
"That's rich coming from a bitch who had a baby after one hard lemonade last year! Everyone hated you, and still does. God knows why people put up with you. You're just a fucked up, washed up, little bitch!" Santana stood up and spat the words right in the head cheerleader's face. The lunchroom went dead silent as everyone in the room turned to observe the fight that would no doubt take place relatively soon. Quinn clenched her jaw and stood slowly.
"You ever talk to me like that again, and you are dead." Her eyes burned into the other girl's, and for a moment, Santana felt genuine fear. But then Quinn's face instantly transformed back into a smile, and she pulled her friend into a hug. "Talk to you later, girl!" And she flounced away, leaving the entire lunchroom flummoxed.
"Why do you come here during lunch?" Blaine questioned Kurt after school, since he had missed their usual lunch meeting. Sebastian had convinced him to go to lunch, and all he had received from it was a front row seat to the weirdest mood swing of the century.
Kurt looked up from where he was watching his own fingers plunk sporadic notes out on the piano. He squinted his eyes at Blaine, furrowing his eyebrows.
"Why do you think?" They sat in silence for a few seconds before Kurt began to play up and down a scale mindlessly, waiting for Blaine to answer.
"I think you're scared." Blaine muttered, but Kurt understood what he actually meant without Blaine needing to say the words.
Kurt lifted his fingers from the piano and dropped them to his lap. The silence dropped heavily upon both boys' shoulders, weighing down on them. It permeated all of Blaine's pores, invading his body, keeping him short of breath. It flooded Kurt, calming him in gentle waves of peace, helping him to breathe and think easier and clearer.
"I'm not a coward," Kurt started, "no matter what you think. I'm not a coward." Blaine opened his mouth to object, but the look on Kurt's face stopped him before a sound even escaped his throat. "I'm smart." Kurt took a deep breath and blinked. "I'm not hiding. I'm not trying to cover up who I am, or avoid fighting back. I'm protecting myself the only way I can. I can't fight back physically, and if I fight back with words, they only beat me harder." He pressed his hand down on the piano, notes creating an awful discord in the air. "Doing what I do is the only way I can survive. It's the only way I can keep myself from slowly dying."
Blaine stared at Kurt as his speech ended, and the sound of the piano finally died down.
"You think you're such a victim, Kurt." Blaine stated, anger building inside of him. Kurt's head flew up as Blaine flew off the piano bench, and their eyes met. "You think you're the only one with problems. You think your life is such a big sob story, and you want pity. You want it all to end. You want people to leave you alone, because you're dying inside, or some shit like that. Well, you want to know what, Kurt? You should learn to deal with it! Other people have problems, too." After a few loud, angry breaths, Blaine stormed out of the chorus room. Dramatic exits were becoming a habit for him.
Dear fucking Diary,
I can't wait for this party. I really need to get some pussy ass. But no one can find out. God, I hate my life. I should just kill myself.
"What up, bro?" Sebastian wrapped his arms around Blaine's shoulders in a manner meant to be familiar, but actually felt threatening and stifling.
"Not much, you?" Blaine robotically responded.
"Dude, you okay?" Sebastian asked, tightening his hold on Blaine's shoulders. The smaller boy tried to shrug him off to no avail.
"Yeah. Fine." He grunted.
"K. Whatever." Sebastian replied flippantly. "You psyched for Quinn's party tonight?" His next few steps bounced a bit, though his mood dramatically declined with Blaine's lack of enthusiasm.
"Yeah. Sure."
"Dude. Seriously. The fuck's the matter with you?" Sebastian grabbed both of Blaine's shoulders and held them tight, trying to gain an answer from the boy. Blaine glared at him.
"The fuck's the matter with you!? Get off me! You a fag or something!?" He pushed Sebastian off him and ran down the hallway, leaving Sebastian stunned and hurt behind him.
Quinn, Santana and Brittany stood on top of the lunch table shouting about Quinn's party. Puck ranted on and on about the dinosaurs he had seen in his first block class. Sebastian stared at Blaine questioningly, and Blaine sat morosely playing with his food. It was only a slightly atypical day for their lunch table.
"Come to my party! Everyone's invited!" Quinn shouted, handing out flyers to nearly every person who walked passed her.
"Every cute person." Santana added. "Also excluded are: queers, fatties, drama geeks, glee club members, marching band members, ugly people, people we hate, and anyone who's been slushied in the past year. The list is on the paper in case you forget." She added sweetly, winking at the guy she handed the flyer to.
"Please stop being such a dick. Be happy. We're gonna get pussy tonight. Quinn's pussy. How awesome is that?" Sebastian attempted to cheer Blaine up for what had to be the hundredth time since that morning. Blaine simply shook his head. "Don't be like that." Blaine flicked his eyes up, ready to tear Sebastian apart, but what his eyes saw spread joy throughout him.
Kurt nervously entered the lunchroom, clutching his brown paper bag in a vice grip. It was the first time he had been in the room since Sebastian had emptied a carton of milk on his head on the second day of school freshman year. He shuffled over to an empty table and sat down, hoping and praying no one would approach him. He could feel eyes on him, though, so he looked up to where he could hear Santana shouting about queers not being allowed at Quinn's party. Blaine was looking at him.
Blaine waved slightly, and Kurt quirked his lips up slightly. He was still mad, but he could admit it felt nice to be back in public.
Sebastian looked in the direction Blaine was waving at to see Kurt. He seethed internally. It was an automatic response whenever he saw the boy.
"Why are you waving at that fag?" Sebastian spat the words out.
"Because I can." Blaine replied defensively. With a look from Sebastian to Kurt, Blaine made a split second decision. He stood up from his seat.
"Where are you going?" Sebastian called after Blaine as he made his way toward where Kurt was sitting alone. When he reached the table, Blaine smiled at him.
"May I sit here?" Kurt looked panicked.
"Won't that be a problem?" He gestured to Blaine's friends quickly, and then at the rest of the cafeteria. They had become a bit of a spectacle. The attention previously on the girls advertising Quinn's party had transferred to them. Blaine grinned even wider and shook his head.
"No." He sat down across from Kurt, as the other boy licked pudding from his spoon. Blaine arched an eyebrow. "The way you're eating that pudding is incredibly suggestive." Kurt looked down at the spoon in his hand and burst out laughing.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I wasn't trying to seduce you, in case you were wondering.." Kurt blushed brightly.
"Well, if you had been, then it worked." Blaine stated boldly. Kurt immediately stopped smiling as the memory of what had happened between them in the past week flashed through his mind.
"Blaine, what are you doing here?" He asked seriously, trying to receive a genuine answer from the boy.
"I wanted to ask you to be my date to Quinn's party tonight."
Kurt did not knock on the door before entering the house. He opened it and walked right in feeling as though he was going to puke, but looking like he was a frequent partier. No one noticed he did not belong. At first.
"Why aren't you drinking!?" Sebastian shouted over the music into Blaine's face, his beer soaked breath making Blaine wince.
"I don't want to." Blaine yelled back. Sebastian stopped his shuffle- dance to look at Blaine with an odd expression.
"I'm gonna go get you a drink. You need to loosen the fuck up, bro!" The taller boy exclaimed, jogging away and spilling his beer, before Blaine could protest.
Blaine left the edge of the dance area to lean against the wall, rolling his eyes and huffing out a breath. He did not know why he put up with all the bull that came with being on the football team. He did even enjoy football. He really did not have a good reason to continue with it except.. he did not want to end up like Kurt- targeted and hated by everyone in the school.
So if Blaine really thought about it, then he was the coward. Not Kurt. He, himself, was the coward because he would not be himself. He would not show who he truly was to everyone.
But those sorts of thoughts were way too deep for a party. He must have been getting high off Puck's second- hand smoke. That is what he reasoned with himself to believe.
"Blaine?" A gentle voice interrupted his internal musings. Blaine startled and turned in the direction the voice came from to see Kurt standing next to him, a vision in tight clothing and eyeliner. Blaine felt his jeans tightening, and he would have berated himself if he had cared in the slightest.
"You look so fucking hot." Even through the darkness and smoke, Blaine could see Kurt blush and a faint smile spread across his lips.
Kurt leaned what he thought was casually against the wall beside Blaine, and they turned to face each other.
"Thanks. Umm.. so do you." His shyness was so adorable, and the way Kurt was biting his bottom lip made suggestive thought after suggestive thought flood Blaine's mind. He groaned load enough for Kurt to hear him and shuffled closer to the other boy.
"Do you realize what you're doing to me?" Kurt looked up at him from under his eyelashes and smirked.
"No.. what?" He giggled gently at Blaine's facial expression, and moved his hand to put it on Blaine's shoulder when a larger body was suddenly crashing into him from the side.
"Oh! Sorry, dude." Sebastian slurred, not even bothering to turn to the side to see who he ran over. "Blaine, here's your drink." He shoved a cup of unidentifiable liquid in Blaine's direction, some of it sloshing over the edge and hitting Blaine's shirt. "Ohh, whoops!" Sebastian giggled and grabbed Blaine's shirt in his fists before getting on his knees and licking the wet spot. "Don't worry, I can get it out."
Blaine stayed completely still where he was, not wanting to aggravate the obviously wasted boy. Kurt had an amused grin on his face and arched an eyebrow at Blaine, wondering how the other boy planned to get out of the situation.
Sebastian unbuttoned the top button of Blaine's shirt and started feeling around Blaine's collar bone.
"We're gonna have sex with Quinn tonight, remember? A threesome!" He laughed as though he had said the funniest thing in the world. Blaine did not respond in any way, so Sebastian stuck his bottom lip out in a pout. "You're not excited? I am." He unbuttoned another button. "Your skin is so warm. I wanna lick it.." He started to rapidly undo more buttons before Kurt grabbed his shoulders and yanked him away from Blaine.
"It all makes so much sense now.." Kurt started, putting pieces of the puzzle together. His tone was filled with understanding and awe. "Why you hate me so much." He stared down at Sebastian, hoping to see some sort of clarity in the boy's eyes, but they were cloudy and mostly unseeing. "You're gay." He whispered. "And you're in love with Blaine."
Blaine stood still. The revelation did not come to him easily, and he needed time to process it. He grabbed Kurt's arm and tried to drag him out of the party. Before they could reach the door, a voice yelled, "Hey! What's the fag doing here?"
Kurt stopped in his tracks and turned, attempting to locate the owner of the voice. Blaine shook his head. "Come on! Let's go!" He pulled on Kurt's arm, but the boy would not leave.
"I'm tired of all of you looking down on me." Kurt started to talk, though no one was listening to him. They all began to whisper to each other, gossiping to each other about how Kurt and Blaine were holding hands. "I'm tired of feeling like less of a person because that's how you all treat me. I'm tired of being ridiculed because of who I love." He squeezed Blaine's hand gently. "It does not define who I am. I should not have hell to pay for it."
Kurt obviously had much more to say, but before he could continue, a lone voice shouted, "fucking fag!" Blaine took two steps forward and put his arm around Kurt's shoulders.
"Yes I am. What are you gonna do about it, asshole?" And then he kissed Kurt square on the lips. It was not a good kiss. It was not romantic. Their lips did not line up correctly. There was no pleasure in it.
A loud gasp traveled through the party- goers. The noise level rose immeasurably higher.
But before any fights could break out, Kurt and Blaine fled the building.
"Are you okay? You're shaking.." Blaine breathed out, concerned momentarily for Kurt.
"Yeah, yeah. It's just…" The boy looked down at Blaine in awe, mouth parted slightly, sweat glistening on his face. "I can't believe I found you and that we're about to do this." He spoke reverently, and flicked a curl gently off of Blaine's face. "I never would have thought I'd fall for you."
Blaine smiled and nodded his head in agreement. "I couldn't be happier that you did." He leaned up to meet Kurt's lips, and had to clutch at the boy's arms when Kurt finally penetrated him. "Oh my god. Oh my god." Blaine panted frantically, slightly panicked but mostly overjoyed. "You're inside me."
Kurt nodded his head and kissed Blaine's forehead. "Yeah. Yeah I am." He laughed nervously. "You okay?"
"Mostly." Blaine replied, too stunned at the situation to truly feel yet. "This is crazy.."
"Yeah, I know." Kurt dropped more of his weight onto Blaine's body, releasing some of the pressure from his arms. Blaine groaned. "You still okay?"
"Uh-huh. Just.. could you, um, move?" Blaine pleaded quickly and Kurt responded with gusto.
Blaine winced through the first few thrusts before an unbeatable pleasure coursed through his body, sending his mind spiraling. He knew he had to be babbling nonsense, but the only coherent thought he had left was how much he loved Kurt.
Kurt, for the first time in his life, felt loved. He felt loved and sexy and wanted and beautiful. He felt on top of the world, and like no one could bring him down.
They hit their climaxes in a simultaneous peak of emotion and sexual release. It felt magical, momentous, and really special. As they cuddled into each other, breathed the other in, they spoke promises of love and affection and forever.
Dear fucking Diary,
Blaine's a fag, too. The signs were there. Guess it's not that much of a shock, but why Hummel? He's such a fairy! It makes me so fucking mad. I want to kill someone.
Needless to say, I did not get ass last night. Quinn still threw herself at me, but I don't want that.
"Dudes. It's probably good Blaine didn't come to school today. Who knows what would've happened." Puck spoke quite intelligently. "It's weird, I had no clue he was a hobosexual.." He set his chin on his hand and stared into the distance, seemingly in thought.
"You also freaked out about having salad yesterday because you felt bad for the lettuce's family," Santana pointed out, refusing to acknowledge anything Puck said as legitimate. Sebastian sniggered cruelly.
"Shut up, douche canoe." He stopped.
"The Bible says that homosexuality is wrong." Quinn stated almost confidently.
"It also says you shouldn't mix fibers, and that's a pretty cool cotton-polyester dress you're wearing." Sebastian pointed out bitingly.
"Seems like you know a lot about it, Seb. There something you need to tell us?" Santana bit back, a challenge obvious in her tone. Sebastian clenched his jaw and was about to retort when a kinder voice began to speak.
"I mean, it makes sense." Brittany began to think out loud. The others at the table turned to look at her, questioning her statement. "That Blaine is gay.. He only has threesomes."
"That doesn't mean anything!" Sebastian immediately jumped to his best friend's defense.
"Wait, let her finish, asstard." Santana waved Sebastian off flippantly and turned back to the blonde in interest. "Go on." Quinn nodded her head, eagerly waiting for why Blaine would reject her.
"He only has threesomes when there is a single girl involved.. and two guys. That's why he wouldn't have one with us, Tana. It makes sense- he always wanted to be with other guys without wanting to be suspicious." Brittany reasoned slowly, piecing her thoughts together aloud. "Come to think of it.." She looked up and made eye contact with Sebastian. He shook his head violently. "You're the same way, Seb."
The entire table turned to stare at him.
Sebastian felt so incredibly uncomfortable. Their eyes bore into him, judging him, questioning him, hating him. He felt sweat drip down his back as his body temperature hiked up uncontrollably.
"I-I've got to go!" He stuttered before tearing out of the cafeteria as fast as he possibly could.
"Did anybody else just see the guy from the Matrix run out of here?" Puck questioned no one in particular.
"I thought you'd be here, you fucking faggot!" Sebastian snarled, hate coursing through his veins, burning him from the inside out.
Kurt startled, immediately stopping the tune he was humming happily. Terror filled his body, freezing him immobile at the sight of Sebastian.
"Wh-what do you want?" He questioned, scuttling backwards slightly, attempting to create space between them.
Sebastian stared into Kurt's eyes for a moment before laughing. It was a hideous, evil laugh that sent terrible chills streaming down Kurt's spine. He shuddered violently and continued warily watching the other boy. He genuinely feared his life in that moment.
"A lot of things, Kurt." Sebastian replied simply, still smirking. He casually crept forward, increasing their proximity. When Sebastian was only a few feet away, Kurt dashed up the risers and behind a row of chairs, separating them once again. The jock only chuckled, delighted with the game Kurt had inadvertently created. He took the risers one by one, slowly stepping his way to where Kurt stood frozen.
"I want you to stop being such a fairy princess." Sebastian began, his tone insinuating the beginning of a long list.
Kurt scoffed, quickly forgetting his current situation. "That's really original."
"I want you to stop shoving it down my fucking throat!" Sebastian growled, lunging forward, landing within a foot of where Kurt stood. Kurt's eyes widened in panic, and he tried to dash out of the corner he had backed himself into without realizing. Sebastian caught him quickly, however, and wrapped his long arms around Kurt's waist.
"Let me go! Get off me!" Kurt shouted, kicking at the taller boy's legs and pushing at his arms. Sebastian began to laugh again. He moved one hand to cover Kurt's mouth and used the other to push him back up against the wall.
"Don't scream." He said rather gently, moving his hand from Kurt's mouth to caress his chin. Kurt's breath came rapidly, and he felt a panic attack rising.
Sebastian took his hands completely off of Kurt, but he did not dare move. He had no clue what the other boy was able to do, and he did not plan to find out. He had to think of an escape. But before he could, the sound of a zipper caught his attention. Kurt looked down and saw Sebastian undoing his pants.
"Get on your knees." Sebastian commanded harshly before pressing down on Kurt's shoulders. "I want you to suck me."
Kurt did.
"Ugh. God. I wish you were Blaine."
He cried and cried.
"Blaine would be so much better at this than you. Yeah, let me fuck your mouth."
He choked.
"If you hadn't come along, this would be Blaine instead of you. But you're just a slut. You'll give it to anyone, won't you?"
Kurt felt used and abused.
"I'm gonna come!"
He swallowed.
"If you tell anyone about this, I'll kill you." Sebastian threatened.
Kurt wanted to die.