A/N: Ok, so I did get all of those present (plus one) in the room, and the conversation has begun - but I had to cut it off with something of a cliffhanger. I wanted to get this done and up at least (and it's the longest one yet), but I need a little more time to work out how the rest of this is going to go (and to decide if it'll even go beyond the next chapter.) Thanks again for any reviews.
Santana walks into the building and sees immediately what needs to be done. She sighs. She's not surprised that she's going to have to be the one to do it, only hopes that she can somehow manage it as quickly and as relatively painlessly as possible.
Taking a deep breath, she approaches Mike and Tina first. She says firmly, "let's go in there. Mr. Shue's waiting, and I think some of the others are already there, too."
They slowly release their grip on one another, and Tina looks at Santana, her lip quivering even as Mike stares at the floor, and Santana tries not to think that she never expected to see Mike looking like this, his eyes red and swollen, and she glances away again even as she says "Come on."
Mutely, without even thinking about why, the two turn to walk to the chorus room, and Santana reaches a hand out to Rachel, who's staring at her now with a mixture of fear and resignation. It's clear that she doesn't want to go, but it's also clear to both of them that Santana isn't about to take no for an answer, and Rachel thinks fleetingly that it might almost be easier to face that room than it would be to face Santana. She stands and allows Santana to take her hand.
As the four move closer to Blaine and Kurt, they release one another, and Kurt sees through his all-too watery eyes that Rachel is up and moving, and he tries to telegraph an emphatic thank you to Santana, and when she looks at him and gives a brief, almost infinitesimal nod, he knows she's somehow heard him. He glances at Blaine, who is trying very hard to take deep breaths and calm down, and he reaches for his hand. He's still not sure what to think of this, but he also knows that it doesn't matter right now. Some things are more important.
And then they are walking through the doors of the chorus room, Santana supporting Rachel in a way she'd never imagined she would have to, and Will, who's been sitting separately from Artie, Mercedes, Sam and Brittany in solemn quiet contemplation, looks up. He'd been thinking he would give the kids some time to themselves, to be together, to allow himself to be summoned only when needed, but he sees Rachel, and the lump is back in his throat, and he hardly realizes what he's doing as he stands and walks toward the new arrivals.
Santana hugs him first. That, he hadn't expected. And when she pulls back and her eyes are slightly more red than before, he realizes he hadn't expected that either, and he lets his hand rest on her hair for a moment before nodding towards Brittany who had also stood at their entrance. They stumble toward one another, and then they are wrapped in each other's arms. Sam's jaw clenches, and he closes his eyes. He'd been calmer for a few minutes, but he knows if he looks too long at Brittany and Santana, he'll lose it again. He's not even sure why he's finding it suddenly so impossible to hold it together, but he is. That much, at least, he's coming to accept.
The next to approach Will is Tina, and she hugs him briefly, letting go before she can allow the tears to take her, and she hardly looks at him again as she moves toward the others, noting how Artie is studiously not looking at her, even as he swipes quickly at his eyes. She takes a seat beside him anyway. She's not sure why, but she needs to be near him right now. Even if they can't think of anything to say to each other.
Mike doesn't want to need anyone. He wishes that he hadn't seen the others in the hallway, that he hadn't let Tina hug him and undo him that way, but there's no use thinking about that now. So he tries to smile and pretend he doesn't look as wrecked as he knows he does, that he's more than capable of helping the others and not needing their help in return. He steps toward his former teacher, intending on a brief hug, but as soon as Will enfolds him, he suddenly realizes he can't pretend anymore as the tears choke him. He knows he's starting to shake again, and he clings in a way he wish he could prevent. He just wants this to stop, but he has no idea when it will. He forces himself to take a deep breath and to let go even though it's the last thing he wants to do right now. And Will's sad smile shows that he knows it, too, but he lets go, and Mike blindly finds his way to a seat, paying no attention to whoever is sitting beside him. Nothing could matter less to him right now.
Blaine and Kurt had been holding hands, but when Will turns to them, Blaine drops the connection. He doesn't know why he's the one to let go when all he'd wanted was for Kurt to be willing to hang on, but he needs Will. He needs someone older to tell him it's going to be ok even if he knows it isn't, and while he knows he's usually the last to initiate the hugs that have become common practice in this room, he does now, and when Will's arms encircle him, he wants to relax, to feel protected, but what he feels instead is his teacher's shaky breathing. And that's when he realizes - maybe for the first time - that nothing will ever be ok again. He swallows hard and pulls himself away as gently as he can manage, but he can't look at Will as he moves toward Tina and Artie. He can't look at anyone. He especially can't look at Kurt because he knows he's hugging Will now, and if he sees what he anticipates to be Kurt's colossal meltdown, he knows he'll be having one of his own, and the last thing he needs for that is an audience. It'll be bad enough when it happens, and he's starting to accept that it will, but he's determined it'll be when he's alone.
But Kurt doesn't have a meltdown. He hugs Will, but he's all too aware of who is still standing behind him, and he's too worried about her, so he whispers, "Go - go to Rachel" because he knows now Mr. Shue needs that as much as she does even though he couldn't have predicted that beforehand.
Neither could Will. But as he and Rachel finally make eye contact, he feels his heart contract in a way he hasn't let happen yet, and he knows he needs her just as much as he thinks she might need him. And then she's flinging herself into his arms in a way that is horribly reminiscent of those celebratory moments after regionals and sectionals, but this isn't celebratory. This is - this is terrible, and she's shaking with sobs that echo through the room as he tries - unsuccessfully - to hold his back. He knows who he really needs at a time like this - the same person he needed by his side at his wedding - and the horribleness of all of this is that he's the one person he can't have now. And that knowledge just makes him cry harder as much as he wishes he could just be strong for Rachel.
But it helps. It helps Rachel, and she calms down more quickly than she'd thought possible because she realizes it's now up to her to help their - her - friend. She hugs Will tightly, and she rubs his back, and it's a long time before he's calm enough for her to let go. When she does, they look at one another, and while she's seen him well up so many times in the past, she realizes now - that was all it was. Full-fledged crying - no, he'd never have let any of them see this if he could have helped it. And the fact that he can't help it now is what's really slamming the reality of all of this home for all of them.
Rachel and Will walk over to the rows of chairs where the others are sitting in various states of silent misery, and he pulls over a swivel chair and surveys the group while Rachel slumps into a chair next to Mercedes, who reaches over and strokes her hair softly, eliciting a wan smile. Will clears his throat weakly, and then they're all looking at him. It's a long moment before he finally sighs and says hoarsely, "I wish - I wish I knew what to say to make any of this easier, but I don't think there is anything. I guess we just - we say whatever we need to right now. Does anyone want to start?"
There is a long silence, and then Brittany sniffles and says, "Mr. Shue - I just don't get it. This doesn't - it doesn't make sense. It's Finn. How - how could he - how could he just be gone?"
But before Will can even think of an answer, a voice from behind him says, "he's not."
And Will feels a chill course through him as he slowly turns and sees Puck slouching nonchalantly in the doorway.
