The familiar Ohio sun shined down on me and the other travelers as I made my way down the airport terminal. The flight I just got off of was from Boston, and the plane from Afghanistan. After my two year tour in the U.S. Military, I was finally home in Lima, Ohio.
I wanted to be in the military ever since my older cousin, Patrick, joined the military as well. I always thought it was the only way for a boy to become a man, to defend his country. So, the day after I graduated from McKinley High School, I enlisted.
I walked through the automatic doors to the baggage claim area and I was greeted by the girl of my dreams: Kitty Wilde. We dated throughout junior and senior year at McKinley, but we broke it off after graduation. It wasn't the fact that I enlisted that caused for the two of us to break up, but just the fact that Kitty didn't want to have that thought in her mind that I wouldn't be returning home alive, and I didn't want that for her, either.
I haven't seen her since the day she kissed me goodbye at the airport. God, she looks so much different now. Her hair, which I usually saw in a ponytail, was now loose, cascading over her shoulders. She looked more mature, her face wasn't as sinister as it was in high school, which I love. She saw me from across the large room and a huge grin went over her face. I gave her a grin in return.
She ran to me. She shoved through a crowd of people from California, and jumped into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. I could hear her start to cry as her face was buried deep into my neck. I couldn't help myself, and the tears soon start trickling out of eyes and into her hair, which stilled smelled like vanilla, just like it did in high school.
We sat at Breadstix, the place where we went on our first date. The place hasn't changed a bit, aside from the updated menu. Hopefully the food got better.
"So how has it been? At Ohio State and all?" I asked her, wanting to catch up on what happened to her in between the summer of me leaving and now.
She scratched the side of her head with a finger. "It's been, uh…it's been good," she said, looking at me. She gave me a forced smile. She's lying, I could see it in her beautiful hazel eyes.
"If you say so," I said, accepting whatever she had to say. We went back to the awkward silence that I tried to break just seconds beforehand.
"Kitty," I started, taking her hand, "I know it's been two years since we've seen each other. Since we've dated. But I just want to let you know, I love you. Forever and always."
I gave her the warmest smile I could muster, and tears started streaming down her cheeks. "You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to come home. I was scared. I didn't know if you died or not. And you never wrote to me, you never even visited me when you came back a few months ago," she said, rambling. Her voice got higher and higher as the tears continued. She started breathing quicker. She was having a panic attack.
I took her hand in mine, and I could feel her heart slowing down, back to the normal rate. "Kitty, I wanted to write, I wanted to visited, but I couldn't. Because if I saw you, I wouldn't want to go back. I would have given up everything, just to stay here with you," I said, my eyes looking sincerely into hers'.
"I know," she said, quietly.
After dinner, we went back to Kitty's apartment just off the Ohio State campus. She had a roommate, Fiona, a girl from Kitty's sorority, but Fiona was staying with a friend so Kitty and I could have the apartment all to ourselves.
We went to her bedroom, but nothing happened. I showered and got changed into an old t-shirt she had of mine from high school. It was when the McKinley Football team went to States. I couldn't believe she kept it all of these years. She reentered the room from the bathroom, dressed in another old shirt of mine from high school, a Homecoming shirt with my football number on it from the homecoming game of senior year; the year the two of us were crowned homecoming king and queen.
"I can't believe you still have shirt," I said in disbelief, while smiling.
"I had to have some things to remember you by," Kitty said, before joining me on the bed.
She rested her head on my chest, with her hand on my stomach. I was immediate Ely transported back to numerous times throughout high school, when we would lay in this same position.
"I love you," I couldn't help the words from coming out my mouth. They just came out.
I expected Kitty to tense up. Even though we both knew we loved each other in high school, we never said it. Ever. "I love you, too," she said. She shifted her position, so that her chin was resting on my chest now, and she was looking up at me. "You know, I never thought it would be you and me. I always thought you and Marley would find your way back to each other, and I would end up with some low life."
"Always expect the unexpected, as I would say," I said, causing her to smile.
Days past, and I was still crashing in Kitty's bedroom. Even though she didn't mind, I felt bad. She was too busy paying the rent from her internship from the summer and with studying, while I would just sit in the living room and watch television.
The two of us went out with friends from high school, Jake and Marley, who were still together from high school, at Breadstix. We managed to get there before the two of them got there, and I surprised Kitty by saying, "I want to get a job. I want to help you pay the rent, to pay the bills, whatever."
"But you just got back. Isn't it a little soon?" she asked me. I couldn't help but nod.
"I did help repair the trucks when I was over there. Maybe I could get a job at Hummel's Autoshop?" I suggested. Kitty gave me a warm smile.
"Jake works there. You could ask him about a job, or something," she said. She always supported me, and that's what I loved about her. She wouldn't let anyone not get what they want.
Jake and Marley soon showed up, and the four of us exchanged hugs. Marley and Jake went to University of Lima, so they rarely saw Kitty. "So how's it been? Being back home, and all?" Marley asked me.
"It's good. So much cooler than the desert," I answered, with a chuckle. The rest of the table smiled.
"What are your plans? Are you going to go to college?" Jake asked me.
"I dunno, man. I've been staying with Kitty at her apartment, but I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do. I want to start looking for a job soon, but I'm no one will higher someone who has no college experience," I answered, Kitty took my hand. We smiled at each other.
"I could look into a job at the auto shop, if you want me to," Jake said.
"That would be awesome, thanks man," I said, happy that an old friend of mine is helping me.
Kitty and I returned to her apartment two hours later. We were both happy to get back to the apartment, and get some sleep. I went into the bedroom and got ready for bed. When Kitty came into the bedroom, she didn't look too pleased to find me already nodding off. "Don't you dare fall asleep on me, Ryder Lynn," she said, shaking me awake.
"Let me sleep, please!" I begged, rolling over.
"I want to give you something, a welcome home present," she said. I perked up at the sound of "present".
"Oh really?" I asked her, giving her a seductive smile.
"It's not sex, you idiot," she said with a small giggle. "You haven't heard me sing in two years. I haven't sung in two years. I want to sing you a song."
"You haven't sung in two years?" I asked her. She shook her head no.
"I had nothing to sing about," she said, giving me a smile. "So here we go." She put music on her stereo and stood at the foot of bed, hand on her hip, just like she would start all of her performances in glee club in high school.
KITTY
I'm walking fast through the traffic lights
Busy streets and busy lives
And all we know
Is touch and go
We are alone with our changing minds
We fall in love 'til it hurts or bleeds or fades in time
And I never (never) saw you coming
And I'll never (never) be the same
You come around and the armor falls
Pierce the room like a cannon boom
Now all we know is don't let go
We are alone, just you and me
Up in your room and our slates are clean
Just twin fire signs
Four blue eyes
So you were never a saint
And I loved in shades of wrong
We learn to live with the pain
Mosaic broken hearts
But this love is brave and wild
And I never (never) {[x8]: Oh oh, oh oh oh-oh-oh-ooh} saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
This is a state of grace
This is the worthwhile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right
These are the hands of fate
You're my Achilles heel
This is the golden age of something good and right and real
And I never (never) saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
And I never (never) {[x8]: Oh oh, oh oh oh-oh-oh-ooh} saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
This is a state of grace
This is the worthile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right
The music finished and I found myself wiping tears away from my eyes. I forgot how beautiful her voice was until this very moment. She started to cry when she saw me cry. "I feel like such a tool, because I would sing all the time in my camp's talent shows," I said, making her laugh. "But I always felt empty, like I was missing something, when I sang, and I think that was you."
"So are you gonna sing me something?" she asked me, climbing on top of me.
"Do you want me to?" I asked her. She nodded, biting her lip. "Alright." I rolled over, placing her on her back on the bed and got up from the bed. I walked over to the stereo, and changed the song.
RYDER
You were standing with your girlfriends in the street
Falling back on forever, I wonder what you came to be…
I was new in town, the boy with the eager eyes
I never was a quitter, oblivious to schoolgirls' lies
When I look back on those neon lights
The leather seats, the passage rite
I feel the heat, I see the light
Miss Atomic Bomb
Making out, we've got the radio on
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
Racing shadows in the moonlight
Through the desert on a hot night
And for a second there we've won
Yeah, we were innocent and young
Cast out of the night, we'll you've got a foolish heart
So you took your place but the fall from grace was the hardest part
It feels just like a dagger buried deep in your back
You run for cover but you can't escape the second attack
Your soul was innocent, she kissed him and she painted it black
You should have seen your little face, burnin' for love
Holdin' on for your life
All that I wanted was a little touch,
A little tenderness and truth, I didn't ask for much, no
Talk about being at the wrong place at the wrong time…
Miss Atomic Bomb
Making out we've got the radio on
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
Racing shadows in the moonlight
We're taking chances on a hot night
And for a second there we'd won
Yeah we were innocent and young
The dust has settled, and my eyes are clear
But sometimes in dreams of impact I still hear
Miss Atomic Bomb, I'm standing here
Sweat on my skin
And this love that I've cradled
Is wearing thin
But I'm standing here and you're too late
Your shock-wave whisper sealed your fate
It feels like a dagger buried deep in your back
You run for cover but you can't escape the second attack
Your soul was innocent, she kissed him and she painted it black
You should have seen your little face, burning for love,
Holdin' on for your life
But you can't survive
When you want it all
There's another side
I finished the song and Kitty got up from the bed and walked over to me. She put her hand on the back of my neck and pulled me down for a deep, passionate kiss.
Then and there, I realized that where Kitty is, is where my heart is.