NoName-chan: WWWAAAAAHHHHH! I'M SO SORRY! I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN, LIKE, A MONTH! It's just that, school started up 2 weeks ago, so I've been too busy to even work on my fics. And then the few times that I've gotten the chance to update, I've had Writer's Block. The only reason I'm even able to update now is because I had to stay home sick today T_T
Lenalee: Awww, it's okay, NoName-chan! ^^
Road: Yeah, it isn't a problem at all~
Tyki: Wait, didn't she just say that she's SICK?!
Lenalee: Yeah?
Tyki: THEN WHY IS SHE HERE IN THE AUTHOR NOTE ROOM WITH US INSTEAD OF BEING AT HOME?! O.O
NoName-chan: *Throws a random sandwich at Tyki's face* BECAUSE I'M THE AUTHORESS AND I DO WHAT I WANT! Plus, I'm feeling better now~
Tyki: *Whimpers*
NoName-chan: Anyways, I'd like to thank all of my fabulous reviewers, favoriters, and followers for their support~! This story is doing way better than I thought it would! This thing has over 2,000 views, too! Thank you all so much! I'd also like to thank everyone who have supported my other stories. Especially those who have supported my newest fic, D Gray-Show. I do not know why, but I really like that story~!
Lavi, Tyki: WE DON'T!
Allen: *Cries in the emo corner*
NoName-chan: *Flips table* GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY EMO CORNER! AAUAGAHAGUAGASUSHUAGAUSHDWERMGCMTUGCNX43CMHXMCGHJH U4C5
Tyki: …
Lavi: What's wrong with Allen, anyway?
Tyki: Road raped him in the Endnote of Chapter 8, remember?
Lavi: WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?! O_O
NoName-chan: *Hits Tyki over the head with the shovel* HE WAS UNCONSCIOUS WHEN THAT HAPPENED, YOU DIPSHIT!
Tyki: Oh yeah…. Well, anyways, what happened was…..
*Flashback*
Road: Yeah, he's nice, but I'm more into Allen.
Christina: Wait, isn't Allen unconscious?
Road: *Grins* Yup. *Drags Allen's limp body out of the room*
Christina: *Gulps* D-Do you think he'll be okay?...
Tyki: Probably, but I wouldn't count on him still being a virgin by the time the next chapter starts….
Christina: *Eyes widen* OH GOD…
Tyki: Yup. The horrible truth of what happens when you leave Road alone with somebody she likes…..
Christina: I'll go save Allen…
Tyki: *GASP* So you actually care about Allen after all?
Christina: What? No. He owes me 10 bucks.
Tyki: *Sighs* Good enough…. I'll go with you.
Christina and Tyki: *Leave room*
Christina: Okay, so where might Road have gone?
Tyki: Isn't it obvious?
Christina: *Eyes widen upon realization* Oh my god…
Christina and Tyki: *Sprint away*
*At McDonald's*
Christina and Tyki: *Arrive, panting, and immediately go to the Little kid playset*
Christina: *Gapes in horror at the scene*
Road: *molesting one very naked Allen on the slides*
Allen: *Still unconscious, but has duck tape over his mouth and ropes tying his hands and feet together*
Dozens of small children: *Watching the scene while throwing dollars at Road in encouragement*
Christina and Tyki: WHAT THE HELL? O.O
Road: *looks at them* Oh, hello~
Christina: Of all the places to rape Allen in his sleep, you choose THE PLAYSET AT MCDONALD'S?!
Tyki: YEAH, WHY MCDONALD'S? YOU COULD'VE GONE TO CHICK-FIL-A!
Christina: *Facepalm* I meant, WHY IN FRONT OF DOZENS OF KIDS?!
Road: Because this is probably the last place the Police are going to look for a rapist. Plus, the manager doesn't mind, and the kids love it~!
Christina: *Sighs* Ok, whatever, but we're going to have to take you away from Allen. Rape is horrible for Ratings.
Road: *Eyes narrow* Not happening. Kids, ATTACK!
Children: *Eyes turn a demonic red and teeth grow long and pointed*
Christina and Tyki: WHAT THE FUCK?!
Children: *Start growling and running towards Christina and Tyki*
Christina and Tyki: *YELP. Run for their lives*
Children: *Chase after them*
Road: *Smirks and continues where she left off with Allen*
Allen: *Groans. Eyes begin to open*
Road: Oh, good morning, Allen~
Allen: *Eyes shoot wide. Starts thrashing*
Road: *Duck tapes him to the slide* Oh, no you don't! Now, *Grins* Where was I?
Allen: *Whimpers in fear of his life and virginity*
*MEANWHILE WITH CHRISTINA AND TYKI*
Christina: WHAT…. *pant* THE HELL…. *pant* IS WITH…. *pant* THESE KIDS?!
Tyki: I…. *pant* DON'T KNOW…. *pant* IT MIGHT…. *pant* HAVE TO DO…. *pant* WITH ALL THE MCDONALD'S THEY EAT!
Children: *Growl and Snarl viciously*
Christina and Tyki: *Yelp and sprint faster as they continue to run in circles around the McDonald's restaurant*
NoName-chan and Kanda: *Walk in, followed by several fangirls.*
Christina and Tyki: *Crash into them*
NoName-chan: OOMPH-?! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLE- Oh, hey, Christina.
Christina: NONAME-CHAN?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
NoName-chan: Buying milkshakes for the fans with Kanda. What about you?
Christina: Tyki and I were trying to save Allen, but Road sent a bunch of Demonic Children after us!
NoName-chan: What Demonic Childre- *sees horde of children running towards us* HOLY SHIT!
Christina and Tyki: *Whimper* PLEASE HELP US!
NoName-chan: It's okay, it's okay, calm down. I've dealt with worse.
Tyki: WORSE?! WHEN DID YOU DEAL WITH WORSE?!
NoName-chan: *Face darkens* That one time to Hardee's….
Christina and Tyki: O.O
NoName-chan: Anyways, the point is, I know how to deal with this. Just do exactly as I tell you…..
*5 minutes later*
NoName-chan: Okay, is everyone ready? Good. Now, GO!
Christina and Tyki: *Stop running from the children and turn to face them*
Children: *Continue running toward them*
Christina and Tyki: HEY, LOOK AT THIS! *Each throw a Happy Meal across the restaurant*
Children: *Smell the chicken nuggets and immediately chase after the Happy Meals instead*
NoName-chan: NOW!
Kanda: *Uses Mugen to cut a rope, releasing a large metal cage on top of the children*
Children: *Realize they're trapped and start growling and hissing, but cannot break the cage*
Christina and Tyki: *Panting* Oh thank god….. Thanks, NoName-chan!
NoName-chan: No problem. Now, *looks at Kanda and the fangirls* let's go get those Milkshakes~!
NoName-chan, Kanda, and fangirls: *walk over to the Ordering Counter*
Christina: Now, let's go save Allen!
Christina and Tyki: *run back to the kids' area*
*AT THE PLAYSET*
Christina and Tyki: *Arrive. Gape at the scene*
Allen: *Crying in the corner, naked and terrorized*
Road: *Smirking while adjusting her skirt*
Christina: OH GOD, WE'RE TOO LATE!
Road: *Grins* Damn straight~!
Tyki: So…. Allen's not a virgin anymore?
Christina: I'm afraid not.
Tyki: Oh god…
NoName-chan: *Walks into the room with a milkshake* Hey, guys, we finally got our milksha- *Sees the scene* WHAT HAPPENED?
Christina: We didn't get here in time….
NoName-chan: *Exasperated sigh* Whatever. Anyways, we got our milkshakes and now we're going back to the NoName-chan Fanfiction Co. building. You guys coming?
Road: Of course~!
Christina and Tyki: *Shrugs* Well, we failed at the task we came here to complete anyways, so we might as well….
Allen: *Rocking back in forth in a traumatized state*
NoName-chan: …..I'll take that as a "yes." Now, let's go~! *Grabs Allen by the hair and drags him away*
Kanda, Road, Christina, and Tyki: *follow*
*End of flashback*
Lavi: So, wait, Road raped Allen while Demonic McDonald's Children chased Christina and Tyki around?
Tyki: Pretty much.
Lavi: Wow…..
NoName-chan: *Hits them with my Crack-fic Shovel* STOP TALKING! Anyways, I haven't yet received any notice from Catdoggasaurous about saying something in the Author Notes, so she won't be saying anything today. But the option is still open to her if she decides that she wants to say something! I'm also opening this option up to WinterPrentice, myangelicladyofdarkness, and Magicsinger (though I'm not sure if she reads this story or not….) for helping me think up Dares, Questions, Tortures, and Randomness for D Gray-show. Oh, and this option is also open to Pineapplebombgirl for reviewing 4 times~! ^^
Tyki: Geez, you're letting a lot of people into the Author Notes -.-
NoName-chan: So? *Shoots him a death glare* Do you have a problem with that?
Tyki: *YELP* N-NO
NoName-chan: *Hits Tyki over the head with the shovel* WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT YELPING IN THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER?!
Tyki: *unconscious*
Christina: *Sigh* We're only two minutes in, and NoName-chan has already brained someone with a shovel…
Lavi: *gasp* OH MY GOD, IT'S CHRISTINA!
Christina: Well, no shit. -.-
Lavi: Well…. It's just, you haven't said anything yet today…..
Christina: *rolls eyes* That's because I was still recovering from the horrors I experienced in the previous Author Notes.
Tyki: *Suddenly wakes up* HORRORS?! THERE ARE DENTS SHAPED LIKE ME ON THE WALL! WHAT HORRORS HAVE YOU BEEN PUT THROUGH?!
Christina: I had to wake up to your ugly face above me.
Road and Lenalee: OOOOOOHHHH SNAP~!
Tyki: *Sighs*
Lavi: *Looks around* Hey, where's Yuu-chan?
NoName-chan: At the Hospital.
Lavi: WHAT?! O.O WHY?!
NoName-chan: Well, after we left McDonald's, we ran into a horde of fangirls who were pissed at me for only giving pictures of Naked Kanda to Candyslayergirl. So, to "atone" for my actions, I pushed Kanda towards them and ran for my life.
Lavi and Tyki: *Gape in horror* Y-YOU'RE EVIL…..
NoName-chan: You JUST figured that out? -.-
Lavi: That's almost more evil than that time Road told Komui that I raped Lenalee! O.O
NoName-chan: *Pales* OH SHIT…
Lenalee: What's wrong, NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: I forgot to let Komui out of the closet. o_o
Lenalee, Lavi, Tyki: HE'S STILL IN THERE?! O.O
NoName-chan: So….. do you think he's still okay after being tied up and locked in a closet with no food or water for a month?...
Road: Eh, I'm sure he's fine…..
*MEANWHILE WITH KOMUI*
Komui: *Crying for help as vultures that somehow got into the closet begin to surround him*
*BACK WITH THE IMPORTANT PEOPLE*
NoName-chan: Yeah, you're probably right.
Christina: Um….. ok. So, will someone do the Disclaimer already?
Road: I got it~! NoName-chan does not own DGM~!
…
Christina finally rose from the soft comfort of her bed once she saw that the sun had risen out her window. She couldn't help but yawn heavily. 'Maybe I should've gone back to sleep after all...' the young girl thought regretfully. Nearly the moment she rose to her feet, she heard a knock on the door and opened it to find a smiling Lenalee.
"Good morning, Christina-chan," the dark haired girl greeted.
"Same to you," Christina replied with a smile.
"You wanna come to breakfast with me? After that, we need to take you to Johnny to be sized for your uniform."
"Okay. Just give me a few minutes to get dressed." Lenalee nodded and waited patiently for Christina. The light haired girl quickly decided on a simple pair of dark jean shorts, a short sleeved white button up blouse, and a pair of white flats. She quickly took care of bathroom necessities and joined Lenalee in the hallway. The two teenagers walked to the cafeteria in comfortable silence. Upon arriving, Christina and Lenalee ordered their breakfasts from Jeryy- Lenalee's being average sized, and Christina's being a trolley full of food- and sat down at a table with Allen.
"Good morning, Allen-kun," Lenalee cheerfully greeted the boy, who, after swallowing an apple-sized bite of scrambled eggs, looked over at the two girls sitting across from him.
"Good morning, Lenalee, Christina," Allen replied with a smile. The trio returned to an eating-filled silence until a fourth teenager arrived.
"Oi, Christina-chan, Lenalee-chan, Moyaahi-chan," Lavi greeted with the same mischievous glint in his eye as always. A vein popped in Allen's forehead.
"It's ALLEN, baka usagi!" Christina's sweat dropped.
"No fighting!" Lenalee ordered, and the two boys immediately went silent. "So would you care to join us for breakfast Lavi?"
The redhead smiled. "I'd love to, but I already ate. I came here to tell our sweet Christina-chan that Komui wants to see her. So, finish your food and- WHOA! You eat as much as Allen does!"
"It's a parasitic-type thing," Lenalee explained. "So what does Nii-san need Christina for?"
"I think she has a mission," Lavi replied.
Lenalee looked shocked. "A mission? Already? She just got here last night! We don't even have her uniform yet!"
"I think Komui wants to take care of the uniform thing now. As for the mission, she doesn't leave til this evening."
Christina, who'd been silent throughout this, just nodded her head and finished wolfing down the rest of her humongous breakfast. Lavi then led her to Komui's office, but didn't enter with her, claiming that he had business to attend to. Even though she had seen it before already, she still gaped at the storm of papers that littered the room. She spotted Komui himself standing in front of his desk, sipping coffee from a mug with a pink bunny on it. The purple haired man smiled upon Christina's arrival.
"Ah, Christina-chan!" he greeted in a singsong voice. "Johnny will be here shortly to take your measurements." No more than a few moments later, a short man with frizzy brown hair, glasses, and headphones burst into the room.
"Sorry for the wait, Komui!" he said, then looked at the light haired girl. "You must be Christina. It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Johnny."
"It's nice to meet you, too, Johnny," Christina replied politely.
"So polite! She's a bit like Allen, isn't she, Komui?" Johnny asked the Supervisor, who nodded his head in agreement.
"Now, if you could get her measurements, I would like her uniform to be done by tonight," Komui told the brown haired man, who walked over to Christina, quickly took her measurements, and walked away. "Also, I'm sure Lavi told you, but you will be leaving for your first mission later today. Please come back here at approximately 3 P.M. for your uniform and a quick mission briefing." The light haired girl nodded her head in agreement before leaving the Supervisor's messy office. However, it didn't take long before she found herself lost.
"Oh no, not again..." she muttered under her breath. Luck seemed to be on the young girl's side, however, as she soon spotted a black coat, which she had figured out were used to identify the Exorcists. She quickly made her way up to the figure. Christina quickly took note of the man's appearance. He was a short elderly man with only a small patch of hair on his head. He wore an emotionless expression upon his face and had dark circles around his eyes. 'He looks a bit like a panda...' the teenager couldn't help thinking to herself. The man looked up at her.
"So you must be the new exorcist, Christina, am I correct?" the old man asked out of the blue.
Christina blinked. "Yeah. It's nice to meet you, ...?"
"Bookman. I don't have a name, so you may address me as Bookman. Now what is it you need, Christina?"
"I was wondering if you could point me back in the direction of the main halls? I haven't figured out my way around here yet." Bookman just nodded his head slowly.
"Continue down this hallway for 7 doors then take a left and you will be back in the main hallways."
"Thank you, Bookman," Christina stated. The short man just nodded his head in acknowledgment then continued walking the way Christina had come from. Carefully following Bookman's directions, the light haired girl soon found herself back at the main hallways. She yawned heavily and looked at a nearby clock. 10 A.M. The young girl decided to take a short nap before she had to go meet Komui again, and made her way back to her room. Turning the doorknob slowly and opening the door a crack, she was relieved to find that this WAS indeed her room. After slipping off her shoe and closing the door, Christina lied down on the bed and quickly succumbed to the inviting allure of sleep.
…
Christina woke up a few hours later, fully rested. Her eyes shot open. 'Oh shit, what time is it?' she wondered and frantically looked for a clock. Quickly finding a black and white one hanging to the side of her door, she discovered that it was 2:45 P.M. 'My meeting with Komui is in 15 minutes!' Quickly throwing on the shoes she had been wearing earlier that day, Christina bolted from her room toward Komui's office. Doing her best to remember the route she had taken that morning, the light haired girl managed to navigate her way through the hallways and stumbled into the messy room.
"Sorry I'm late!" she exclaimed, panting.
The purple haired man looked over at her. "Actually, you're right on time. Take a seat." Christina obeyed and took a seat on a couch she found in the middle of the room. Soon, she realized that she and the crazy scientist weren't alone.
"Oh, hello Kanda," she greeted the blue haired man that sat on the opposite side of the couch as her.
"Che" was his only response.
"Alright!" Komui began. "While we wait for Johnny to get here with your uniform, Christina, let's do a quick mission briefing. Lately in the city of Madrid, Spain, there have been reports of strange, extinct, and legendary animals, such as saber tooth tigers, unicorns, and even dinosaurs, roaming the streets and attacking people. A large amount of Akuma have also been spotted. We believe that there's a high chance of Innocence being involved. Your mission is to track down and acquire the Innocence, if there is any, and destroy the Akuma in the area. Now, be sure to eat a good dinner, because you both will be boarding your train at precisely 7 o'clock tonight." Christina was struck dumbfounded at that last part.
""Both"?" she questioned confusedly.
"You and Kanda will be completing this mission together," Komui explained.
Kanda just responded with another "Che."
Finally, Johnny burst into the room, holding a small stack of clothing.
"Here's your uniform, Christina. Be sure to let me know how you like it later," the brunette said, handing Christina the clothes and hurrying out of the room.
"Well, Christina, I'll be leaving the details of your mission with your Finder, so this meeting is over. Go change into your uniform and eat dinner then be ready to leave at 6:30, okay?" the Supervisor asked, earned a nod from the girl in response.
Christina managed to make her way back to her room without getting lost. 'So I'll be completing this mission with Kanda? Well, he doesn't seem bad. Maybe a bit cranky, but not bad,' she thought while walking. Once she arrived back at her room again, the light haired girl closed the door behind her and checked the time. 3:20. 'That meeting wasn't very long at all...' She then changed into her uniform. The girl walked about a bit to see if it fit, and was surprised by how well it did. She couldn't believe how easy it was to move around in! She then spied herself in a large mirror which hung on her wall.
The uniform consisted of a black jacket with silver linings, long flowing sleeves that covered most of her hands, a relatively high collar, two silver crosses over her shoulders, a silver zipper down the middle of the front, and a silver rose crest over the left side of her chest. Under the jacket, she wore a black tank top made of an incredibly soft material. The uniform also consisted of a pair of short black shorts with a black scarf-like belt and knee-high, slightly heeled, black boots. Christina couldn't help but gape at her reflection. It was PERFECT.
After about 5 minutes of staring at her new uniform in the mirror, the light haired girl shook herself from her daze and quickly brushed through her tangled brown hair before heading back down to the Cafeteria.
Christina ordered her trolley-sized dinner order and wheeled the cart of food to a table where she found Lavi and Kanda.
Lavi was the first to notice her presence. "Oi, Christina-chan, you got your uniform! It looks great!" the redhead exclaimed with a huge grin.
The dark haired man next to him growled. "Baka usagi. Stop being so damn loud. I'm trying to eat."
"Awwww, Yuu-chan!" Lavi whined. "Don't be so cold in front of Christina-chan!"
"Che. Like I give a shit about what the baka risu thinks." Christina's eye twitched.
"Did you just call me a stupid squirrel?" she questioned, quickly losing her temper. Lavi just stared at her. She was usually so quiet. But now she seemed almost... deadly. She seemed like a whole other person.
"Yes, do you have a problem with it, baka risu?" Kanda asked, somewhat threateningly.
"Oh, no, no. Not at all, Garce Reine," Christina replied sarcastically.
A vein popped in Kanda's forehead. "What did you just call me?" he asked, icy anger and irritation lining his every word.
Lavi answered his question. "She called you a Garce Reine. That's French for "bitchy queen."" At this, Kanda snapped.
"That's it! DIE, BAKA RISU!" the man roared, unsheathing his katana and lunging at Christina. By this point, quite a crowd had gathered to watch the argument carry out. Everyone who had been watching gasped in horror as Kanda lunged at the light haired girl, seeming to think she was done for.
A feeling of shock spread throughout the room, however, when the girl dodged the sword with ease. Even Kanda looked fazed. Christina simply smirked. If 8 years of living on the streets running from Noahs had taught her anything, it was hand to hand combat. Kanda seemed to shake himself from his daze and attempted to swipe at the young girl once again. And once again, she dodged with ease. This pattern continued for a few minutes until Christina whirled herself around while dodging a swipe so that she was behind the older man. With one swift motion, she kicked Kanda's legs out from under him, causing him to fall in a disorganized heap. And finally, to conclude the fight, the light haired girl picked up the blue haired man's katana and gently ran her fingers along the blade mockingly.
The entire Cafeteria was in shocked silence for several moments. Suddenly, the room erupted in cheers. NOBODY took Kanda on like that and lived to tell the tale! Soon, the crowd dispersed, and Kanda was once again on his feet, radiating hatred. Christina handed back his katana, smirking.
"Next time, don't be an arrogant asshole, Garce Reine." The man just gave her one of the angriest glares he'd ever given and stormed out of the Cafeteria. The light haired girl then reclaimed her spot at the table and continued eating her dinner.
Lenalee and Allen soon arrived with puzzled expressions as they saw Lavi frozen, eyes wide, with his jaw hanging open in shock.
"Um, what happened?" Allen asked the statue-like redhead.
After a few moments of silence, Lavi finally gulped and spoke. "Yuu-chan just had his ass handed to him by a French girl." The next several minutes were spent as Lavi described the scene that had recently occurred in detail and Christina ate her ginormous dinner. Once Lavi was finished, Allen and Lenalee stared at the light haired girl in shock.
"C-Christina..." Lenalee stuttered.
"In my defense, he attacked me first," the younger girl stated nonchalantly as she finished the last of her dinner.
Allen then burst out laughing. He laughed to the point where he was literally rolling on the floor in tears. "Christina, you have GOT to teach me how to do that sometime!" he exclaimed, still laughing.
Lavi looked at the young girl. "How DID you do that anyway? You always seem so quiet and innocent, but you just told off and took down Kanda!" Christina grinned.
"We all have our dark sides, don't we? Mine just happens to be my temper. Make me mad, and I will not hesitate to judo-flip you." The other three teens shuddered.
'So now they know what I'm like when I go black...' Christina thought, laughing evilly.
Chapter 9 End
…
NoName-chan: Well, I'm sorry to say that this chapter is on the shorter side….. But, hey! At least the next chapter is long! Anyways, yeah, this chapter was mostly just another Filler chapter. Sorry to disappoint anyone who was waiting for something Plot-Relevant to happen. But don't worry! The plot begins to show itself in the next chapter~! As for now, what do you guys think?
Christina: *Laughing ass off* THAT WAS AWESOME! I BEAT UP KANDA!
Lavi: *Laughing ass off* THAT WAS AWEOME! SHE BEAT UP YUU-CHAN!
Lenalee: Christina has a black side? O.o
Road: …. *Laughs*
Tyki: ….You are so lucky that Kanda's still in the Hospital….
NoName-chan: Pffft, like he'll ever know that any of this happened.
*MEANWHILE AT THE HOSPITAL*
Kanda: *Shoots up in bed*
RandomNurse: Kanda, what's wrong?
Kanda: I don't know why, but I have the sudden urge to kill NoName-chan….
RandomNurse: Nah, you're probably just having your period.
*BACK WITH THE IMPORTANT PEOPLE*
Tyki: Are you sure about that?
NoName-chan: Positive. There's no way Kanda knows.
*The blood-curdling scream of RandomNurse is heard from a distance*
NoName-chan: *Pales* Okay, maybe he does.
Tyki: You're so screwed.
NoName-chan: *Whimpers momentarily before a bright smile appears on my face* I HAVE AN IDEA! *Runs from the room*
Lavi: What do you think she's doing…..?
Tyki: No clue.
Kanda: *Bursts into the room swinging Mugen around* WHERE IS SHE?!
NoName-chan: *Walks into the room*
Kanda: YOU! *Runs towards me*
Tyki and Lavi: She's screwed.
Road, Christina, Lenalee: *Smirk* Do you REALLY believe that? This is NoName-chan we're talking about.
Tyki: What do you mean by that?
Road: This is NONAME-CHAN. Since when does anybody beat her?
Lavi: Wait, so what you're saying is that she actually has a PLAN?!
Christina: Duh.
Tyki: What's her plan? O.O
Lenalee: You'll see~ *Grins*
Kanda: *Still running towards me*
NoName-chan: *Smirks and pushes a button on the remote controller I'm suddenly holding*
*Over the Intercoms, Lenalee's voice plays, screaming "HELP! HELP! KANDA'S ASSAULTING ME IN THE AUTHOR NOTE ROOM!"*
Kanda: *Pales* Oh shit…..
Komui: *Bursts into the room, screaming, and attacks Kanda*
Kanda: *Screaming*
Tyki: Wait, I'm confused, what just happened?
Lenalee: Well, just in case of Emergency, NoName-chan has recordings of my voice that she can play to say whatever she wants over the Intercoms. All she did was let Komui out of the closet and push a button.
Lavi: *Pales* Wow. That's evil. O.O
NoName-chan: *Smirks* I know~
Komui: *Drags a tied-up Kanda away*
Kanda: *Screaming and thrashing*
Road: So, what now~?
Christina: Hm….. Let's get Allen up!
Lenalee: *Looks at Christina curiously* Why?
Christina: BECAUSE HE STILL OWES ME 10 BUCKS!
Lenalee: Oh yeah…..
Road: So, how do you propose we get him up?
Christina: *Grins* Like this: HEY, NONAME-CHAN! ALLEN'S EATING FOOD IN YOUR EMO CORNER!
NoName-chan: WHAT?! *Takes out shovel and starts beating Allen* GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY EMO CORNER!
Allen: *Snaps back into reality* AH! OW! WHAT THE FUCK?!
NoName-chan: DIE!
Allen: *Gets up and starts running for his life*
NoName-chan: *chases after him in rage*
Lenalee: Oh, great. Now she's going to kill Allen!
Christina: No she won't. I've got THIS! *Holds up a taco* HEY, NONAME-CHAN! IF YOU STOP CHASING ALLEN, THEN THIS TACO IS YOURS!
NoName-chan: *Freezes* TACO?! YAYZ~! *Snatches the taco from Christina and starts skipping around in joy*
Allen: *sighs in relief* So, what did I miss?
Lavi: Not much. Just a pointless chapter and a good 'ole fashion Kanda beating courtesy of Christina.
Allen: *Looks at Christina* YOU BEAT UP KANDA?!
Christina: *Smirks* Hell yeah.
Allen: *starts bowing to Christina* OH, GREAT AND POWERFUL CHRISTINA, HOW MAY I SERVE YOU?
Lenalee: Okay, this is just too weird. What's going on here?
Lavi: I don't know, but suddenly….. I feel really…... strange.
Tyki: Me too…..
Lavi and Tyki: *Look at each other and start making out*
Lenalee: WHAT THE FUCK?!
Road and NoName-chan: *Start skipping around with video cameras* YAY FOR YAOI! YAY FOR YAOI!
Lenalee: WHAT'S HAPPENING?!
*The world around Lenalee begins to change colors and blur until it fades to black*
Lenalee: *Eyes shoot open. Looks around to find herself surrounded by a colorful city. A Yellow Brick Road swirls around the center of the plaza and leads out of town. Looks down to find a fluffy black dog in her arm and two ruby red slippers on her feet*
Munchkins: *Walk up to Lenalee and gasp* YOU KILLED THE WICKED WITCH!
Lenalee: *Sees them and jumps back* HOLY SHIT, GREMLINS!
*The world goes black again*
Lenalee: *Eyes open slowly*
Christina: Lenalee? Leeeennnnaaaalllllleeeeee? You there?
Lenalee: *Rubs eyes* Huh? W-what happened?
Road: It's time for the show, that's what!
Lenalee: Show?
NoName-chan: That's right! It's time for… *Suddenly appears on the set for Jeopardy* JEOPARDY~!
Lenalee: *Snaps awake to find herself back in the Author Note Room*AH! TRIVIA!
Allen: *Raises an eyebrow* Trivia?
Lenalee: Oh….. nothing….. it's just… What happened?
Christina: What do you mean? After Road and NoName-chan started skipping around, you passed out.
Lenalee: I passed out?
NoName-chan: Yup. You've been unconscious for, like, ten minutes.
Lenalee: Oh…..
NoName-chan: Yeah, it's weird.
Lenalee: Oh well, at least that strange chain of dreams is finally over….
GiantBanana: *Appears out of nowhere* Or is it?
Lenalee: AH!
*World goes black again*
*MEANWHILE IN THE REAL WORLD*
Lenalee: *sleeping in a chair with some wires stuck to her head*
NoName-chan, Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Road, Tyki, Christina: *watching a screen that's showing Lenalee's dreams*
Tyki: Wow, she dreams about some weird shit…..
Lavi: Wait, how are we watching her dreams anyways?
NoName-chan: I took…. Er, "borrowed" a machine from Komui. It lets you see into people's dreams while they sleep.
Allen: Why are we watching Lenalee's dreams again?
NoName-chan: Because I'm sick today, and I don't have enough energy to run an actual Author Note. So, I decided to use this machine to let us see somebody's dreams and use that as the Author Note instead.
Christina: Wait, how did you know that Lenalee would actually dream about an Author Note?
NoName-chan: The machine also allows you to alter dreams. So, I just made Lenalee dream about an Author Note for Chapter 9.
Road: *shrugs* Whatever floats your boat~
Kanda: Che.
NoName-chan: ….. Anyways, I think-
Komui: *Bursts into the room and sees Lenalee. SHRIEK* YOU USED A MACHINE ON MY PRECIOUS LENALEE?! HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO HER?! *Pushes me out the window*
NoName-chan: *Falls* AAAAAAHHHHHH!
Allen, Lavi, Road, Tyki, Christina: *Gape at Komui* DID YOU JUST KILL THE AUTHORESS?!
Komui: Well….. um… SHE DESERVED IT!
Christina: Um…. Something tells me that we should end this Author Note here…
Road: Agreed. 'Til next time~!