A God's Chessboard

Omake

Disclaimer: You know the drill. I'm just playing in an awesome sandbox.

A/N: This was partly to comfort me, as I can't stand a week without completing a chapter. It was also to partly distract me from personal life issue. BTW, Chapter Five will be probably released on Wednesday or the day after that.

In another world, the Uchiha Massacre never happened. Minato Namikaze and Kushina Uzumaki never died, and an unseen soul slips through the barriers of reincarnation unknowingly. Of course, this doesn't mean that this is the original NARUTO world. Set in Modern Day AU.

I.

I stare.

Fuck no. I can hear Kyōki completely agree in my head.

"So!" Sakura bounds toward me, her face set in a sort of jubilant triumph. I begin inching away cautiously, careful not to look at that...thing. "How do you like it?"

"It's..." I trail off, shuddering. "...unusual. Appallingly unusual."

Sakuta pouts. "Come on, it can't be that hard. Just try it on!" She waves The Thing in my face. I gag as it penetrates the three foot distance I had carefully measured. "You act as if this was green spandex or something."

I eye The Thing with new consideration. "True. It's definitely worse than green spandex."

"Kakashi! Get your lazy ass here!" Sakura yells, alerting Naruto, Kakashi, and both of my brothers. We had all gathered in the Uchiha Compound for lunch, celebrating our sixth anniversary as a team. Or, at least, Team 7's sixth anniversary.

Sasuke and Itachi take one look at The Thing and simultaneously say the same thing. "Hell no."

"I know." Naruto is in harmonic agreement with both of them for once. "Kami, people actually wear something like that?"

Sakura sniffs disdainfully. "I'll have you know that I bought this at Guess. Not a cheap penny."

"And you can't wear this because...?" Sasuke seems to be still processing why on Earth someone would be buying this. Itachi, apparently, is of the same notion, and is nodding mutely along.

"Because I don't have a big enough chest to wear this strapless thing," Sakura says shamelessly. "Luckily, Chiyoko does, so she's wearing it."

I bang my head on the table. The Thing, or I suppose, a black lacy one piece that reveals entirely too much indecent cleavage, was bought on the bet that Sakura and Ino could—would—buy something so scandalously clad that I would refuse to wear it. In my defense, I was drunk, Sakura was drunk, and Ino came along with the ride.

"Does this have anything to do with that bet you made last week...?" Naruto cranes his head sideways, as if seeing it in a different perspective will make the dress better. "I mean, Chiyoko-chan is really awesome and everything, but..." He glances apologetically to me. I shrug. "...this isn't her style."

Instantly, Sasuke goes on the defensive. "You're saying my sister isn't pretty?" he asks coolly, the only sign of his irritation a twitching eyebrow. I smother a giggle as Naruto frantically denies what ever he has said in the past ten seconds.

"But...you know," Kakashi says, tilting his head slightly to the right. "This looks like Icha Icha Tactics' Maki's outfit."

I pause, taking the dress in a slightly new light. "My God. You're right. You are so totally right. I mean, like, right there, in that angle..."

Sakura blanches. "Please don't tell me that Jiraiya made this," she begs. I raise an eyebrow.

"He's a designer. For all we know, this could be one of his failed experiments."

Sakura visibly wilts, then brightens. "Ah! But you still have to wear it, Chiyoko-chan!"

I bang my head on the table again.

II.

"Who are you and what have you done to my daughter?" Mikoto half demands, half jokingly says to me as I awkwardly come out of my room. I grimace, mostly because my heels feel like they're going to snap at any moment, and Sasuke is gaping like a fish while Itachi subtlety chokes on his tea.

Fugaku raises an eyebrow over his newspaper and cup of coffee. "Is this some new fashion or what everybody keeps telling me as teenager rebellion?"

It is morning, and Sakura has gleefully told me that, according to the bet, I must literally wear this all day, from school to night, and since then I have been repeatingly cursing her in my sleep. "Just for today," I inform Otou-san, still trying out my shoes as if they are about as fragile as glass slippers. I wouldn't be surprised if they were.

Fugaku nods, then flicks his finger towards me. "If any reporters follow you, pretend you don't know who they are or who they're talking about."

I nod solemnly. "On the Uchiha Clan's honor," I promise, then turn to Sasuke dryly. "Well, come on. Our chauffeur isn't going to drive by himself."

Sasuke manages to somehow remain dignified and indifferent to my outfit as he strides forward out the door. "Bye, Oka-san, Otou-san!" I call out. "Good luck to you for work, nii-san!"

The moment I arrive at my locker, Ino pounces on me, no doubt ready for the latest gossip. "You actually did it!" she gasps. I give her a blank stare. "...that was a stupid question, wasn't it," she says sheepishly. "Here's two thousand yen."

I put the money in my locker, satisfied. Meanwhile, Sasuke is ignoring me pointedly, sending a few obvious glances in my direction occasionally. I suppress a smile. Ever since I accidentally threw myself off the roof when I was nine, my brother has miraculously turned into a mother hen. This is probably helped by the fact that I have the ability of "getting into things that don't concern me. At all."

"Who are you?" A familiar voice sends Ino zooming away and me whipping around.

"Sai-chan!" I grin, hugging my best friend cheerfully."I haven't seen you in such a long while! How's work going?"

The eighteen year old views me with ill-concealed concern. "Chiyoko-san, are you sick?"

I slump. "It's OK!" I chirp. "Only for today and because of a stupid, stupid bet..."

Sai doesn't look entirely convinced at my mutterings, but he passes it off in favor of examining me. "Is your leg injury passable for inspection?"

"Ah..." I smile nervously and wince as I accidentally twist my ankle. "...Sort of. Tsunade-sama did good work on it but she says it'll be another month until it fully heals." Beside me, Sasuke is attentively listening but rummages loudly in his locker so as not to give me that image.

Sai frowns. "You shouldn't do that, then," he reprimands me, then turns to Sasuke and gives him Creepy Smile No. 7. "Good morning, Asexual. How was your day?"

Suffice to say, the morning was quite...eventful.

Even I worried for them when Naruto, Sasuke, and Sai were escorted straight to Tsunade-sama's office.

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen! (Or whatever the time is in your country.) I put in an omake in mostly because a) I wanted a break from Chapter Five and b) to assure myself that you guys won't hate my guts for going a week without an update. Hopefully.

This is set in Modern Day AU. It isn't to say how the Uchiha Massacre will turn out in my story, or how Chiyoko sets herself in Team 7, but I wanted a Modern Day one-shot without all those problems that Obito and Madara set for them.

Good news! :) I published another story, called Of Chaos and Ruination. It's actually Modern Day AU (surprise surprise—sarcasm meant) but it's a fairly different AU OC story.