A/N: I've trying to write this chapter as fast as possible so I hope you all enjoy it :) Hope this chapter is longer enough for u
A/N2: WARNING! If you are a person who doesn't take suspense too well, do not read beyond this point, for the is a major suspense point in the chapter. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED...
Previously on Hushed Dreams
"There's something I need to get off my chest. It's been on my mind and killing me, so here it is," I sighed, could I really go thought with this? Would they still except me for me once I tell them the truth? Would they still want me as part of their family after I've lied to them all this time? Would Edward still love me for me, not some superstar? All these questions were running through my head, I could help but feel uneasy from it all. I looked at Rosalie and Alice. They both looked back at me with one question in their eyes, Are you sure? Was I? I had no idea. Here goes nothing...
"I'm not very sure how to start this. But I want to know, how would you all react if I told you..."
Chapter 7
Secrets Gone Wrong
"Told you...that...I'm not ready. Not ready to be a vampire yet. Unsure if I want to be one, is what I'm trying to say," I lied.
I couldn't say the truth, the real thing I really want to get off my chest. It was too much to bare. I couldn't face what their reactions would be. I couldn't face losing the most important people in my life. If I lost them — Esme, Carlisle. My second parents. Jasper and Emmett. My Brothers. Edward. The love of my life. I mean, I would still have Alice and Rosalie. I think. Because they already know the truth. But still. The Cullens are the only and closest people to me as far as family goes. The only person I have as my blood family is Charlie. My mom...is a completely different story. One that I hate. One story that I wish doesn't exist, but doesn't disappear. The way I want it to.
"So you don't want to be changed?" Edward asked, hopeful.
"I didn't say that. I said that I was unsure about it. I mean, will I still be the Bella you all love. Are you all going to want to stick around when I'm some crazed newborn?" I asked. Although this isn't what I really wanted to tell them, I still want to know these things.
"Love, of course we will."
"Why wouldn't I want to stick around my awesome sister?" Emmett wondered.
"Of course we would stick around. You're a sister to us. We love you," Jasper said. That's the first time he's ever said something like that to me. And it meant a lot to me.
"There's nothing you could do to get rid of us." Alice stated matter-of-factly. Rose nodded in agreement.
"Kudos."
"Bella, there's nothing to be worried about. We'll all be here standing right by your side every step of the way," Carlisle said.
Esme stood up, walked over to me and wrapped me in her arms. I leaned into her embrace.
"Isabella, you must understand that no matter what happens when that time comes, we will all be here for you. There's no way we could leave you. Your a sister to Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie. The one Edward will love forever. And most of all, a daughter to Carlisle and myself. Forever and always. There's nothing you could do or say to change that. We love you dearly, I love you. You're like a daughter to me and I will stick with you, right along with everyone." When she said that last sentence, I wanted to cry.
Esme has been a mother figure to me, a great one at that. But hearing all of this from her, made my day but made me think of my own mother. But I knew that Esme was serious when she told me all of that, because she only calls me by my complete full name when she is serious with me. Or angry with me. But that only happened once.
"You all really mean what you say?" They nodded in reply to my question.
"Ok! Enough with the denial and sapyness, let's watch a movie to together!" Says Alice.
She put on The Blind Side and we all sit somewhere around in the living room. Alice and Jasper where snuggled together on one one the couches, Esme and Carlisle were on the other sofa, Rosalie and Emmett were sitting a few feet away from where Alice's feet were dangling for the couch, and Edward and I were sitting together on the love seat. I snuggled close to him while he wrapped his arms around me. The beginning on the movie had already started.
(Pay close attention)
Then a sudden question came floating around in my head.
"Hey, what would you guys do or say if I told you a secret of mine? One that I've been keeping from you ever since I met you all." Emmett started to laugh.
"For one I couldn't trust you ever again. And two... Ehh who am I kidding? I just wouldn't want to be around you anymore, I mean come on Bella. How could you do that to us?" He pondered.
I sat there horrified. After hearing that, Emmett could never know my secret. Then I heard Alice and Rosalie agreeing with Emmett. Whaaaat? How could they? The two of them already know the truth and they're fine with it! More than ok with everything. Did they play me? Whats going on right now? Next I hear my worst fear being said.
"I don't think we could still be together after that, Love. If there's no trust there's no love. And I'm sorry for that," Edward stated simply. They defiantly can't find out. Nope, no can do. No sir-y Bob. Not gonna happen.
"Why do you ask, Bella?" Jasper asks curiously. I gave a face and a hand wave.
"Just curious."
"Ok," They all said in unison. Then turned back to the movie. I turned my face into Edward's chest. A few tears escaped my eyes. I would lose my family if I told them. I would lose pretty much everyone that I really truly care about. The only family to me. I would lose everything I love. Everyone I love. I tried to hold in the sobs that began to build up in my throat, but failed. I started to sob. I couldn't hold in the tears any longer. The sobs began to become louder and louder. I heard voices. Someone tried to touch my arm but I violently pulled my arm away. I screamed as loud as I could. Hearing the words of my family...it was like someone stabbing me in the heart with a rusty knife, twisting it — torturing me with pain — then pulling in out. Imagining Edward leaving me again because of a secret, the thought itself ripped the hole right through my torso. The pain of it was worse than the first time I ever felt it. I tried to hold myself together but it wasn't possible. I couldn't bare the pain. I screamed my heart out multiple times. I heard voices starting to panic, calling my name.
"Bella? Bella!" I felt someone shaking my shoulders. Loving kisses on my lips were placed. I squeezed my eyes shut.
"BELLA!" My shot open. All I saw was the Cullen's hovering around me. I sat up and saw that I wasn't in the living room anymore, I was lying on the bed in Edward's room. When did I get here? Edward sat in front of me and grasped my hands in his.
"Bella. What's wrong?" I opened my mouth to reply 'nothing, I'm fine' but he stopped me before I could.
"And don't even say nothing. It's not nothing and you're not fine. You wouldn't have been freaking out if it was nothing."
"Wait what even happened all I remember was being down stairs watching the movie and...I don't know." I was dazed and confused. What the hell just happened?
"You don't remember anything?" Asked Alice. I simply shook my head.
"Well, a few minutes after the movie began, you fell asleep. So I took you upstairs so you were comfortable while you slept. Out of nowhere you started crying and whimpering. And screaming," Edward said in a pained voice. "I tried waking you, but you pulled yourself away from me. Love, what was wrong? I've never seen you act that way before? I..I..." He couldn't continue. I took a deep breath to steady myself. It was a dream, just a dream. No a nightmare.
"A..uh bad dream, that's all..." I looked at the time. 8:27 at night. Dammit, Charlie will be home soon, I wanted to surprise him with a nice dinner, since I just got home. I got up and looked at my family.
"I'm sorry you guys, I gotta go. Charlie should be home soon so...umm see you guys tomorrow?" I asked, as if for permission. Esme beamed.
"Of course sweetie. We would all love to hear more about your trip," she said. I nodded, smiling gently at her. I grabbed my messenger bag, swung it around my body and grabbed my keys.
"I'll walk you down," Edward said. I smiled up at him.
"Oh, Bella! Text me when you get the chance, ok?" Alice said.
"'Kay. Will do. Bye Everyone," I said turning away, down the stairs. I heard various farewells from everyone and chuckled.
"Love, are you sure you're okay? I could drive you home if you'd like," Edward said as we descended down the stairs.
"Really Edward, I'm okay. It was just a terrible dream." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of doubt in his face.
Once I got to the front door, I turned to face Edward.
"Can I come and see you tonight or are you going to be unpacking?" He asked. I smiled.
"I'll be unpacking but I wouldn't mind a little help." I got on my tip toes and kissed him gently on the lips. He returned the kiss and chuckled.
"I'll be at your window when Charlie's asleep."
"Can't wait," I said stealing another kiss from him.
"I love you."
"I love you, too," with saying the reply I left. On my way home, all I did was think. What am I going to do? I was close to telling my family my biggest and only secret. But I told yet another lie. The more lies I tell, the guiltier I feel. The longer I put off telling them the truth, the more it could possibly hurt all of them.
The next morning, I slept in late. But a little too late. I looked at my alarm clock and saw that it was 2:17 in the afternoon. I jumped out of my bed. I have a sound check for a show I'm in Seattle. In only a little over an hour I have to be there. And it takes about a hour and a half to get there. Damn! I snatched my phone for my nightstand and texted the first person I thought of.
To: Crazy Pixie Sister
Hey, I can't make it today, to ur house. Just woke up a total mess like 2min ago nd I gotta be a sound check at 3:30 in Seattle. So sry. But can do me a huge favor and drive me there, cuz I kno I could probably get there with in 20 min considering ur madd driving skills...
I was going to hit send but got surprised by none other than Alice herself.
"Rose is in the car downstairs and your cloths," she said holding up a Hollister bag,"are right here. Now go brush your teeth and all that so we can get you going," Alice said, pushing me to my door, handing me my bag of toiletries.
I nodded, rushing to the bathroom. I quickly brushed my teeth and brushed out the small kinks in my hair. Once I was done, I pretty much ran back to my room. The cloths Alice brought for me were laid out on my bed. It was a deep blue top that had 3/4 sleeves. A pair of black yoga pants and ballet flats that matched the color of the top. And of course accessories. A necklace that had a diamond studded heart on it, a pair of ear rings to match, a ring that had a blue pearl on it, and lastly, a pretty white flower hair clip. In less then five minutes I was dressed and ready to go. Alice braided my hair into a beautiful side french braid. She didn't put too much make-up thank god. Just a touch of blue eyeshadow, light mascara, and light pink lip gloss.
The hair clip was clipped in a way the hold back my long side bangs. When I looked in the mirror, I couldn't help but feel pretty. The outfit mad me look 'Ella Marie', but since my fashion sense has really grow as Bella, no thanks to Alice, I felt like myself. Just in a slightly glamorous way. I grabbed my light blue cross body bag and stuffed my iPhone, wallet, keys, my personal small notebook — full of notes from previous meetings and shows. Along with lyrics to songs that I've written in the past and current ones I'm working on now — and my white sunglasses. Alice was already in the car downstairs waiting for me with Rosalie. I practically ran downstairs. Grabbing a granola bar and a bottle of water, I ran out the door and into the car. Rose chuckled.
"Your actually made it to the car without tripping once, surprising." All three of us giggled and we were on our way. I felt my phone vibrate in my bag. It was a text from Edward.
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Hello, Love :)
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Hey u :)
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
How's ur day so far with Alice and Rose? They torture u with a make over yet :3
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Lol not really. It was just a quick change from PJs the a comfortable casual outfit :P and light makeup surprisingly
From: Edward
To: Bella
Lol very surprising. I can't wait to c u l8er, imu :(
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Imu 2 :( but at least we'll c each other later :)
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Leave i find a bright side :) but we won't c each other 4 long sadly
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
:/ how come?
From: Edward
To: Bella
Alice and Rose are forcing all of us to go c the Seattle show of Ella Marie, u kno. That singer that they work for now. But I was hoping that they asked u too...
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
They did but I uh, don't really like Ella Marie that much...and concerts her concerts aren't really my thing...
More lies...
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Then I'm staying behind with u, more time together :D
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
U don't have to, plus I think I'm going to La Push to hang out with Jake. I haven't seen him in a while so, yea. But u go have fun with ur family :)
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Bella, r u sure u don't want me to stay? If u do want me to, I'm more then ecstatic to do so.
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
No it's ok, just have fun ok? Besides, by the time that show ends, I should be home and my window will be wide open ;)
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
:D YAY!
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Lol is Alice finally starting to rub off on u? xD
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Lol no thank god. I luv my sister but sometimes she can be too much lol smh
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Lol ok well I gotta go now cuz I've been busy txtin u and Alice is getting annoyed from the ringing of my giving my this look like if-ur-phone-rings-one-more-time-im-gonna-shove-it...maybe I shouldn't finish that thought :P I luv u 3
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Lol nd I luv u more 3
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
I luv u most 3 3 3
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Lol ok fair play, u win :* luv u
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
Luv u more
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Luv u most ;)
To: Edward 3
From: Bella
-.- not cool...stealing my trick...I still luv u anyway 3 g2g now bye :*
From: Edward 3
To: Bella
Lol bye :*
By now, we were already in Seattle in less then a half hour. My car came to a complete stop in the garage to the Seattle Concert Arena. I saw all the people lined up on the streets, along the sides of the building. There must be hundreds of people. Hell maybe thousands along these streets! All for me. No matter how long I could be in the business, not matter how many times I have seen things like this, it's still amazes me to no end on how much my fans love me.
It reminded me of this time maybe a year or two ago, where it was mid-December and there was a snow storm over the city of New York. In the snow, brick cold winds and all, thousands of ppl waited outside for 3 hours —bundled up and all —in front of, next to, near, Madison Square Garden, just to see a show that was almost cancelled due to weather. But when I saw all of my loving, dedicated fans standing there waiting for those doors to open, I knew that I couldn't cancel.
And that night I put on an ass kicking show. I even surprised myself with the way my band, dancers, and I all performed on stage. All was well, my loving fans are always there.
Later that night, it was 10 minutes to showtime. So all of the dancers, band, my security, crew, and my two sisters gathered in the main hall, holding hands in a circle. Ashely did the prayer tonight. Once it was over, we all cheered and wish each other a 'good luck' and took our positions. I heard the thousands of fans screaming my name.
'Ella Marie!'
'Ella Marie!'
'Ella Marie!'
It brought me joy and hope for a great night, but something told me something bad is going to happen. But I brushed it off. Then my eyes caught the eyes of the the Cullens.
After the show I was getting ready to go home, there was a knock on my dressing room door. It's was probably Rose coming to get me so we could head home. But it wasn't.
"Mrs. Marie, I just wanted to —" Edward stopped short, staring at me, for a looked like myself. Bella. Not the girl he saw on that stage tonight.
"But—how—why didn't you—no," He stammered.
"Edward, I—" he cut me off.
"No," he said. There was confusion, slight anger, and hurt written all over his face. Before I could say or do anything, he ran out the room.
Creating a stir outside where the rest of the Cullens stood. They all stepped into the room, simply looking at me. Not paying any mind to they I ran after Edward. My eyes fell on him, where he stood down the hall. I ran to him and grabbed his hand in mine.
"Edward, please you have to listen to me. Understand why—" he shook his head violently and pulled his hand free from mine. Edward took a step back.
"Please. Don't," he said. Before I could react there was a small wind and he was gone.
I sank to the ground before me, and sobbed. What have I done?
—I kno some of you guys probably wanna choke me half to death for what I have just written. But don't worry, there will be a a good ending to this story and maybe a sequel. Who knos? I've already started the. Halter and will try to have it finished and posted within two weeks. School for me starts exactly one week from now so updates might be shorter and longer waiting time period, but I'll do my best.—
❥❥❥Reviews keep Bella sane and Victoria away ;) ❥❥❥