Tuchanka: Urdnot Clan Leader's Residence

"Dad, did that turian really save you from the Geth?"

"Ha! It was me who…"

"Morka ate all the varren jerky."

"Now, Morka, your mother told you…."

"Dad! Grith head-butted me."

"Grith, stop…."

"But Karok head-butted me first."

Back before the Genophage had been cured, Urdnot Wrex, like most krogan, had dreamed of having a big family, but he had since discovered that the reality of it was often somewhat less than idyllic. After a long day of arguing with sniveling politicians and corporate idiots about a joint colonization project with the asari and elcor, all the krogan leader wanted was to eat some dinner, have a glass of ryncol, and relive a time when he could solve all of his problems with a shotgun blast to the head. Instead, he could barely hear the vid over the din, and every attempt he made to solve one problem was drowned out by two more.

Making peace was more Bakara's area of expertise than his, but since she was away applying her skills to a dispute between two of the other clans, Wrex knew he'd have to try something else. Rewinding to the appropriate point, he loudly thumped the arm of his chair to get his brood's attention. On the screen, the actor playing him –not nearly so devilishly handsome he thought, but at least big enough –was beating a mercenary to death with the butt of his shotgun. Turning to his progeny with a toothy grin he declared, "Listen up you little Pyjaks! You know what that batarian did?"

Before another argument could break out, Wrex bellowed, "He didn't let your father finish his drink in peace!" As a quiet settled over the room, the krogan chief chuckled to himself. Sure, the batarian may have actually been one of the terrorists who'd tried to drop an asteroid on Terra Nova, but if the lie bought him a few minutes peace from his kids, there was no need for them to know that.

A Safe-House Somewhere in the Terminus Systems

As the bidding between prospective anonymized buyers continued to heat up, Kasumi Goto smiled with satisfaction at the prize sitting on the mantle behind her. Sure, the real Shepard's Indra would doubtless have fetched an even higher price, but the prop they'd used filming the mini-series was still proving to be quite the attraction. Plus, she may have been a thief, but even she would've felt at least a little bit bad about breaking into the commander's house.

This, on the other hand, served the producers right. If they expected her not to steal from them, they should've at least sent a royalty check. Sure, she wasn't the easiest person to find, but a little effort would've been appreciated. Besides, if they hadn't wanted to get on her bad side, they shouldn't have cut almost all of Jacob's screen time. Was a shirtless scene or three really too much for a girl to ask for?

Sanves: Melanie Shepard and Liara T'Soni's House

"Of course," Melanie complained as she reached down to grab a slice of pizza. "Somehow I knew they'd pick this mission to spend half an episode on."

"I am not certain what the trouble is, love. I do not recall you telling me that this was one of your more problematic assignments during your time with Cerberus."

Shepard shook her head as her broadcast counterpart entered a fairly convincing replica of Donovan Hock's house. "It wasn't. It's just... never mind."

As Liara idly caressed her wife's leg, she had to admit that her curiosity was piqued, but she could be patient. Eventually, she was confident, she'd get the answer; Melanie's sarcastic rants about the mini-series had become half of the fun of watching it for both of them.

She didn't have long to wait. As the on-screen battle inside the vault began, the former Specter threw up her hands in exasperation. "God! I can't believe they've still got me wearing it. I mean, it was annoying enough breaking into Hock's office that way, but what kind of an idiot do they think I am that I'd get into a full-scale firefight in a cocktail dress?"

"I imagine the director thought that the audience would enjoy watching you, or rather her, in it."

"Yeah," Shepard sighed. "I'm sure you're right, but it's so impractical. Give me a regular uniform any day."

Liara smiled mischievously. "You did not seem to mind wearing that dress for me."

"That's because when I wore it for you, you did delicious, delicious things to me. With Kasumi, I just got shot at."

Liara nuzzled up closer to her bondmate. "You are being unfair to Kasumi, love. When you were the commander of the Normandy, everyone got you shot at."

"That's true," Shepard conceded before leaning over for a kiss. "But at least they didn't all make me get dressed up first."