In the end, False Impressions had had moderate success, but after an extended printing, publication was stopped. Not enough copies sold to make it worth going into a second printing, but Daisy and Onslow were far from disappointed. They had gathered a small legion of fans, and had even gotten a few letters praising their work. It was rewarding to know that their months of hard work had paid off, and that they'd made some people laugh.

Besides, as Onslow pointed out, fame probably wasn't everything.

"Maybe it's just as good that it didn't become a national sensation, Dais'," he said philosophically. "Being famous can't be easy. I think we'd enjoy just being the regular blokes we are now. Famous people always have to keep up appearances."

"That's very insightful, you old oaf," Daisy had playfully conceded.

The book had, however, earned them enough money that they could afford to move to an

apartment not too far from Heather Road. It was much more pleasant and airy than the council house, and Daisy even had room for a flower box on the balcony.

There were other surprising changes as well. Onslow, who now found his old lifestyle of loafing around and watching the telly dull after all that work writing the book, found a job as consultant at an electric supply shop; Daisy, who now enjoyed fiction beyond that of the paperback romance, started working as a cashier at a local bookstore. She frequently chatted with the customers about their selections, sometimes to a fault.

"It's strange, seeing that you're not so bone idle anymore," Daisy teased Onslow.

But before all that had happened, Hyacinth 'Bouquet' came to the council house to give them her opinion of the book…

…

Just one week after the celebratory party, Daisy and Onslow were in the council house, writing a reply to a fan who'd sent a very funny and complimentary letter. They were interrupted when the heard Melly barking outside; long experience had taught Daisy and Onslow what that bark meant. The former flew to the window that overlooked the street and peeked between the curtains.

Hyacinth 'Bouquet', with Richard in her wake, had just walked between the two posts that had once secured a gate. She ignored Melly, who was doing her best to alarm Hyacinth. As for Daisy, it was she that was startled. She flew downstairs, nearly falling in the process, and opened the door with a bang.

"Goodness, Daisy, you startled me!" Hyacinth said; she was already standing on the doorstep. "You seem a bit tense, dear."

Daisy managed to calm down, and she ushered Hyacinth and Richard into the council house, closing the door behind them. She invited them to have some tea in the kitchen; Hyacinth was wary until she saw that it was, to her surprise, very clean.

"And we have some new cups. You don't have to drink out of those chipped mugs anymore, Hyacinth," Daisy chattered.

Just then, Onslow appeared and shuffled into the room. Hyacinth eyed his usual vest with an air of approval, but said nothing. She was even silent as she sat and waited for Daisy to serve the tea, but she did speak at last. Daisy swore afterward that it had been ten minutes until her sister had spoken, but Onslow insisted that it had been half that long. Then he'd gone into some monologue about Einstein and the theory of relativity in relation to time (he'd been watching Open University again).

"The characters and events in your novel," Hyacinth said slowly, "seem terribly familiar. Daisy, did you…base Florence on me? And are all the other characters representing people I know?"

Hyacinth's tone did not reveal any particular emotion, but Daisy lost her composure.

"We didn't mean any harm," she pleaded, wringing her hands in her nervousness. "It was just for fun. And we had a good laugh about the others, too—including ourselves. Don't be angry, sister dear. You're a good person, really."

Then Hyacinth said something completely unexpected.

"Maybe I am a bit overbearing, sometimes."

Daisy and Onslow exchanged an amazed glance. To hear Hyacinth compliment the book had been the outcome they'd hoped for—but to hear Hyacinth admitting her faults! It was akin to hearing a politician admit to a lie; in other words, it had seemed almost impossible.

Hyacinth again assured her sister and her brother-in-law that she wasn't insulted; she even smiled and said cheerfully:

"These are very funny stories. They made me realize that we all have to laugh at ourselves sometimes."

There was no doubt that Hyacinth meant what she said, and after her initial shock, Daisy threw her arms around her sister and hugged her.

"Thank you, Hyacinth! We are glad you enjoyed it! Right, Onslow?"

Onslow, who'd been stunned by Hyacinth's admission that she could be 'a bit overbearing', came back to his senses and nodded enthusiastically, though he still could not speak.

Richard also had high praise for the book, but it was hard for him to slip a word in, as Hyacinth took up most of the conversation, mentioning her favorite bits, remarking on how well-written the story was, and guessing which characters represented the certain people she knew. She seemed especially entertained by the frank view of 'General Sherman', aka, the Major, especially one particular passage:

"Come along then, fine lass!" the retired general entreated. "Oh, you're a buxom little minx!"

Florence tried to throw off his advances. Really, it was quite an honor to have a storied veteran at her formal dinners, but he was quite a bother! 'Buxom little minx' indeed! She tried to make an excuse to, saying she had to go into the kitchen to fetch a cream cake out of the oven, but to no avail. General Sherman followed her into the kitchen.
"I'll help you, you wholesome lady!" (Florence did not like the way in which he said 'wholesome lady').

"Oh, no, don't trouble yourself," Florence said hastily.

"I'll get that cake out of the oven!" the general said. "We don't want your delicate hands to be burned! Now, don't argue, my lily-of-the-field, my pearl of great price."

That was enough for Florence. To put up with his awkward compliments had been testing her hospitality, but to use references to the Bible in this manner was too much! She could only imagine how horrified the vicar would be if he heard that. The usually proper, decorous lady gave the general a prompt kick to the shin!

"Why you—little devil!" General Sherman exclaimed. "That's the knee I injured in the war, it is! I didn't expect such behavior from you!"

"Good," Florence said mildly. "You'll get it worse if you keep pursuing me like that."

This was so unlike Florence's usual restrained hospitality that the general flounced out of the kitchen and stomped violently through the living room, causing the gathered guests to startle. There was a loud bang as he left the house, slamming the door behind him.

Hyacinth wondered aloud why the book hadn't sold more copies.

"It's just not right," she said. "I do wonder sometimes if people know what good literature is."

Daisy hid a smile. Now, that sounded very 'Hyacinthian'—an airy tone and a good measure of italics for emphasis, but she knew the words were well-intended. Daisy quickly assured her sister that it was being published at all, and amusing people, that was all worth it. Daisy, Onslow, Hyacinth, and Richard then spent a merry hour talking about the book, and reciting their favorite bits. Before leaving the council house, Hyacinth had mused, quite seriously:

"I wonder if a television comedy series based on this book would be successful."

Hi! I finished this story early because I wanted to concentrate on some original works as well as a non-KUA fic that people have been asking me to update. I hope to write a final KUA fic in the future, one starring Liz :) Thank you again to my lovely reviewers!

This story is dedicated to all the KUA cast, especially Judy Cornwell and Mary Millar (with all due respect to Shirley Stelfox) who truly were like sisters in 'real life', and to Geoffrey Hughes. Mary and Geoffrey may be "gone'" now, but they truly live on through the characters we love and remember.