Chapter 6: Story Time!
I really enjoy all the different places I could go with this fic. It's reaally fun to write!
(Kagome's POV)
When we got back, Inuyasha told everyone that we were gonna play a game of charades, and we all sat around a fire near the edge of the village.
Of course, my acting was the best. Inuyasha was a sore loser, but after a small outburst from me (saying that if he doesn't calm his stupid dog self down, I would s-i-t him to hell) he relaxed and accepted his loss.
"So...that was fun!" Sango exclaimed, smiling all big, "Your acting was great, Kagome!"
"Yeah, great." Inuyasha groaned.
"Shut up Inuyasha, not my fault the big strong man can't act for his life." I responded, "Thanks, Sango."
"Hey Kagome!" Shippo jumped on my shoulder, "Can we tell stories like we used to?"
I grinned, "Yes! That's sounds so much fun!"
Inuyasha looked over, "Only one story! Humans need sleep and we ain't staying here for another day. We have jewel shards to find, remember!"
Chill, didn't know dogs were so fucking annoying.
"Inuyasha don't be so fucking annoying." I turned my head. Shippo jumped off my shoulder, shocked to hear such a word coming from my mouth so calmly.
"Hey, Kagome!" Miroku quickly intervened before Inuyasha could say anything, "Who's telling the first story?"
"Definitely not Inuyasha." I said, "He's too busy removing the stick from up his ass."
"Hey!" He was fuming, "We gotta collect those shards before Naraku gets to them!"
Yeah! The shards! Because that will totally have made up for not being able to get to you before Naraku did.
I got up. "Go to hell!" I walked into Kaede's hut.
I love how he tries to act like nothing is wrong. Like maybe if he ignores your condition, he can pretend he didn't leave you defenseless to see his dead girlfriend. He acts like he owes you nothing. He can't even watch his mouth.
The things I said were unacceptable, but you'd think that he'd be considerate of me. Nope, guess not.
I paced the hut, trying to piece together the parts of my mind that were still untouched by the poison. With them, I was able to calm myself down as I remembered 3 things: I care for everyone over there (including Inuyasha), I shouldn't say things to hurt people, and only I can make myself do bad things. That poison just exposed me to a hatred that isn't really mine. Whenever I suddenly get enraged, it's not my rage. It's the poison lighting the fire to it's own hatred.
"I should go back." I whispered to myself.
Yeah you should. Be a bitch and apologize. You won't hear one from him.
No. No. It's not my anger and frustration. I shouldn't have been so mean.
I made my way back to the group, who all sat around the fire, scolding Inuyasha. I quietly sat down next to him, who didn't say anything to me.
"Guys, can we still have story time?" I asked.
They all nodded their head hesitantly, except for Inuyasha, who kept his head in the opposite direction.
You know, they're only saying yes to you so you don't become a bitch. Because you can't fight by yourself, they all have to accommodate to your needs. You're a burden.
Was I? I sighed quietly, forcing back tears. I wouldn't cry now and be more of a nuisance.
"Who has a story?" Miroku asked the group. No one answered. They were all uncomfortable with me and I could tell. Were they scared? Secretly annoyed? Look at me. Look at what I did.
"On second thought, maybe we should go to sleep. It is getting pretty late." I said, getting up again, and running away from them. I passed Kaede's hut and ran to the stream on the other side of the village.
A flood flowed down my cheeks and unto my school shirt. I was a burden. I couldn't even use my powers because they were corrupted. The same evil energy came from my arrows. I couldn't fight without risking my mental state.
Now, everyone had to be nervous around me, because I could explode at any second. I bet they wished that I left. Even Inuyasha couldn't look at me. I can't blame him though. I was so mean...
"Miss Kagome, are you okay?" A villager was looking at me, watching me cry.
Why does he think it's his business?
"Fucking fine just leave me alone!" I shouted, immediately covering my mouth afterwards. The villager rushed away, frightened and confused. All he did was ask if I was okay...
You should run away, ya know. You can't do much. You're becoming ten times worse than Inuyasha with that temper. And everyone thought you were strong. Well, it's easier to look strong when you're never faced with any obstacles, isn't it. Well, I'm your obstacle, and you're not strong.
I covered my face and cried into my hands like a little girl. Weak. Weak. Weak. No one wants me.
Naraku is gonna send the infant for you. And then, since we all know you can't force me out, you'll be used to kill your friends.
How can I stop that? I'm not strong enough.
Kill yourself.
No. No. No. No. Please, no.
I looked up into the sky and searched the stars for hope. But they looked dull and faded. In fact, everywhere I looked felt so distant.
Do it, Kagome. Or Inuyasha will die a terrible death by your hand.
Inu-Inuyasha?
I cried even harder, while my body began to shake.
Or of course, you can let him die. He's done so much bad to you. He might actually deserve it.
Not Inuyasha! I-I wouldn't know what to do without him here.
Well, then. It's time you learned how little your worth is. And how your death would actually make everyone happier. If you care so much for that bastard mutt, then you would give him the best gift you can, your corpse.
I-I should kill myself?
"Kagome." I felt a hand on my shoulder. I lifted my head and my puffy eyes met with his. He squeezed my shoulder tight when he saw I had been crying.
"Inuyasha..." I didn't want anything bad to happen because of me.
He pulled me into a passionate embrace, which only made me feel worse about myself. What should I do? I don't deserve to be hugged like this. I don't deserve it.
"Ya know, Kagome..." He began, "We all would've liked to hear a story from you, but you ran away so fast. Why did you do that?"
I sniffled, "Because... you guys are forced to deal with me now all because I can't control myself."
"No, we aren't forced to deal with you." He held me tighter, "We want to help you."
No, he doesn't want to get killed if you end up in the hands of the infant.
"If I don't push out the red poison soon, I'll be taken by the infant and used against you guys!" I responded, "You guys are forced to help me or else I'll be a threat to everyone!"
He sighed, "Do you really think it's just that? That we don't also want to help you just because we want you to be okay?"
Does he think that is believable at this point?
"You didn't care about what you leaving did to me? So why do you care about how I feel with this gas now!" I pushed him away, "Now that I'm a threat, you're slightly more considerate?"
Now, you're catching on.
He looked shocked for a second, before turning his head, "If you think for one second that it didn't occur to me how you felt, you're wrong. And if you think that it didn't make me feel like shit then you're wrong as well. I'm sorry Kagome. I didn't think this would happen. I didn't sense a demonic aura anywhere when I left."
"And that makes it okay!?" This was me. This was all me. I didn't want to hurt him, but now I wanted to know why.
"No. It doesn't." He sighed, "I didn't think when I got up and ran to find her. And now..."
I interrupted him, "Now, you have to deal with me."
"No. I have to deal with myself." He corrected me.
Did it really hurt him that much? Did he regret it that much?
He deserves it.
No. "That makes both of us." I gave a half smile. I needed to stop letting myself get mixed up in those negative thoughts. I will stop, right? I can't just give up.
You deserve it, too.
Stop. Stop it right there.
"Kagome...tell me one of those stories. Like the ones from those weird books you got in your time." His voice was normal, but his eyes were so intense, I didn't know if I could concentrate on a story without getting lost in them.
"O-okay." I nodded my head, and we sat down. The sound from the stream made for nice background noise.
I considered telling him a story about a beast and a princess, or even a glass slipper, but in the end, I told him the story of a girl who fell down a rabbit hole and into a whole new world. I thought he would like that one better.
Right after I told him, he looked down. "Are you gonna go back to your time...after we defeat Naraku?" He looked a little sad.
"I don't think so. I like it here." I smiled.
Either you or him will be dead by then, stupid fucking bitch. You can't fucking accept that can you? And pretending can't stop what's coming. You're going to burn in Hell, Kagome, you stupid fucking whore.
I turned my head. Will I really have to kill myself to save Inuyasha?
My eyes watered, like little clouds, ready to set free the rain. Immediately, I felt a hand holding mine and when I looked over at Inuyasha, his face was so close to me, I could feel his breath brushing against my skin. I shut my eyes out of nervousness. My heart began beating so fast.
Are you gonna be his little whore? Those lips belong to Kikyo and you know it.
I turned my head away from his, "It's getting really late, Inuyasha. And like you said, we can't let Naraku get a hold of the jewel shards! I'm gonna knock out for tonight. Sweet dreams!" I got up, giving him one final smile, before heading to the hut.
I'm wasn't really sure where I was going when I started this chapter, but I included the suicide option to kind of portray how the evil not only fights against Inuyasha, but fights against herself, making her feel like overcoming the darkness isn't even an option for her because she's too 'weak' and that the only way to not become the infant's puppet is to kill herself, as well as making her think that killing herself will also benefit the team because she's becoming a burden. I don't know, I think it's a good way to show how she conflicts with the darkness and how it's also trying to make her hate herself.
Also, fangirl over the almost InuKag moment!
And thanks to Reiko00618 for commenting on every chapter, means a lot!
And thanks to sarahdiamond as well!
And everyone else who has commented! 3