Chapter 60: Another Try

The next day Rae went to her morning classes. Her one afternoon class of the day was canceled so she met up with Ashley and they got Maureen from school and went to lunch. She told them about how her talk went with Olivia and per their agreement, they kept their mouths shut and just listened. Rae could tell that Ashley desperately wanted to tell her what to do but surprisingly she refrained from sharing any advice. When their time was up they took Maureen back to school and Ashley went off to her studio to paint. Rae went home and put the finishing touches on her lab report that was due the next day. When that was done, she decided to get a jump start on her homework that was due for the rest of the week. When she got tired of her homework, she worked on her lesson plans for her tutoring sessions. At four in the afternoon, there was a knock at her door. She went over and opened it to find Simone there with pizza and movies. She invited her in and they sat in her living room eating, watching movies, grading papers and talking. She told Simone about her talk with Olivia and that she took her advice and told her what she needed for them to get back together. Simone was sad to hear that Olivia hadn't told Rae what she wanted to know but she encouraged her not to give up. She was sure that, in time, Olivia would tell her and everything would be fine.

Meanwhile, Ashley picked Maureen up from school and they went on a secret mission. When Rae told them that she and Olivia hadn't exactly worked things out, they were really annoyed. They didn't understand what Olivia's problem was. All she had to do was tell Rae the truth and they would be an item again. They both thought that's what she wanted more than anything. When they dropped her off at school after lunch, Maureen texted Ashley and told her they had to something to speed their reconciliation along. Ashley didn't want any part of it. She agreed to drive Maureen to see Olivia but made it clear she would be waiting in the car. If Rae found out about this little intervention she wanted to be clear of her wrath. They pulled up outside the station and Ashley found a spot on the parking lot. Maureen got out, went inside and took the elevator up to the squad room. She walked through the doors and saw Olivia sitting at her desk. She walked over to her and stopped in front of her.

"What is wrong with you?" she asked. She completely ignored the fact that she had just barged into her work place and practically yelled at her in front of everyone. Olivia looked up and saw Maureen and didn't know what to do or say. She looked to Elliot for some help and he stood up from his desk to address his daughter.

"Maureen, what are you doing here?" he asked trying to pull her to the side. She pulled her arm out his grasp, "I'm here to talk to Olivia" she said as if it was obvious. She turned back to face Olivia, "What is wrong with you?" she asked again. Olivia looked around to see that everyone was staring at her, "Maureen, I don't know you're talking about" she said standing up from her desk. She moved closer to her hoping that would bring her volume down. "I'm talking about Araeyah. You two talked yesterday. Why won't you just tell her?"

"Uh, Maureen that's really none of your business?" she said quietly. "She's my best friend and she talks to me about it so yeah, it is my business. You're being really stupid" she said angrily. Elliot decided he'd step in, "Maureen, out of line" he said sternly. "Well she is dad" she said turning to him. "She supposedly loves Rae so much but she won't tell her what she wants to know so they can get back together. I, for one, am tired of seeing my best friend so unhappy because you" she turned back to Olivia, "keep breaking her heart. All she's asking is that you be honest with her". Fin got up from desk and came over to join the conversation. "Araeyah wants to get back together with you? When were you gonna tell us?" he asked offended. "Yeah. That sounds like something we might want to know" John said jumping in from his seated position at his desk.

"I don't have to tell any of you anything because it's none of your business. It's between Rae and I" she said annoyed by all the unwanted input. "It's only between the two of you if you keep it between the two of you and neither one of you keeps between the two of you" Maureen said. "I second that" Munch said. "Yeah, Liv. We're all involved. We've seen you moping around and sad and listened to you vent for the last three months. You can't just say it's none of our business now" Fin said. Elliot seemed to be the only one who didn't want to be involved in the situation. Olivia sighed and ran her hands through her hair. "What is it that's so bad that you won't tell her?" Maureen asked. "You want me to tell her that I broke up with her because her mother asked me to?" Maureen wasn't sure she'd heard Olivia right. "Wha...what?" she asked dumbfounded. "Yeah. Soraya asked me to. That's why I broke up with her and I don't want to tell her that". Maureen didn't know what to say. She couldn't believe that Rae's mom would do that. That would piss Rae off for sure. "Yeah, no. That's not good" she said softly. Olivia nodded her in agreement. "You just have to tell her" Maureen said after some thought. "I know it won't be easy for her to hear but you have to tell her. Lying to her isn't you or her any good, Olivia. She thinks that she did something wrong".

"I've already told her she didn't" she said defensively. "Yeah, well, she doesn't believe you. She knows you're hiding something. The longer you keep hiding it, the less she's gonna trust you and then you'll really lose your chance to get her back". Olivia didn't want to admit it to herself but Maureen was right. Keeping this from Rae was doing exactly what she was trying to avoid, hurting her. "Just tell her, Olivia" she said. Maureen didn't want her to think about it too much. If she did, then she'd probably talk herself out of it. Captain Cragen came out of his office to a full squad room. Something was obviously going on because everyone was standing around looking at his detectives huddled around Olivia's desk.

"What's going on?" he asked confused. Other detectives and uniformed officers dispersed and went back to their work. "Uh, nothing" Elliot said, "Maureen just came for a visit" he said covering all their asses. "Oh, how are you?" he asked nicely. "I'm good. I actually have to get going. Ashley's waiting for me downstairs". Elliot gave her quick hug, "I'll see you at home" he said kissing her on the top of her head. She said her goodbyes and looked at Olivia and mouthed "Tell her" before turning and heading out of the squad room. "We've got a victim at St. Catherine's" he said holding up a sticky note. "Who's up?" he asked. Elliot grabbed the note, "Liv and I will take it" he said. They both grabbed their jackets and headed out.

The next day Rae went to school and work and then went straight home. For some reason, she was really tired that day. She tried to tell herself that it was because she hadn't eaten enough but really it was because she hadn't been sleeping well since her talk with Olivia. She lay awake at night obsessing over what it was that Olivia didn't want to tell her. She was glad that she'd gotten ahead on her homework the day before because she was able to shower and get right in bed. At around eight o'clock she got a call from Maureen inviting her to a cook out her family was having at their house on Saturday. She asked her if Olivia would be there and when Maureen didn't give her a straight answer she wondered if this was something they'd thought up to get them together in the same place. She agreed to come but said that she'd be bringing Simone with her. Maureen started to whine confirming her suspicions that this was a ploy to fix her and Olivia's relationship. She said it wasn't up for discussion. She'd already told Simone that they could spend the day together on Saturday and she wasn't going back on her word. Maureen pouted her "ok" and then they got off the phone.

Rae didn't sleep any better for the rest of the week. She was anticipating the cook out at the Stablers' house where she'd see Olivia. They hadn't talked since Monday night when she told Olivia that she didn't want to talk to her until she was ready to tell her the truth. She'd taken her decision not to call to mean that she didn't want to or plan on telling her what she wanted to know. She got up brushed her teeth and washed her face then took a quick shower and got dressed. She decided to wear a pair of black jean shorts with a sheer white shirt and tie-dyed bra underneath with white sneakers. She hadn't straightened her hair since she washed it two days before so it fell around her face in waves of curls. She put her contacts in and decided she'd try something different with her make up. Instead of her usual black eyeliner she wore white with black mascara that made her eyes pop and light pink gloss on her lips in stead of her usual chapstick. She put on her favorite white sunglasses and grabbed het tie-dyed bag, tossed in her wallet, phone, lip gloss and chapstick and few hair ties then grabbed her keys and headed to pick up Simone. They went out for breakfast, where Rae had maybe one too many mimosas, and then went for a walk in the park. Simone raved about Araeyah's sexy look and said Olivia wouldn't be able to keep her eyes off of her. She had to admit, deep down that was what she wanted.

They strolled through the park talking and laughing and completely lost track of time. They were supposed to be at the cook out at two o'clock. Rae checked the time and saw that it was almost two thirty. They walked back to her car and headed over to the Stablers' for the cook out. There were already cars lined up in front of the house so Simone, who had to drive for Rae, had to park a little ways down the street. She saw Olivia's mustang and was slightly dreading seeing her. Simone saw the tension come over her and put an arm around her shoulder as they walked up to the house, telling her to relax. Rae put her arm around Simone's waist and they walked to the backyard. As they got closer, they could hear talking and laughing and cheering. Rae opened the gate and stumbled slightly as she stepped into the backyard. Simone had to catch her to keep her from falling. They both laughed but Simone looked up and saw everyone staring at her. She leaned down and told Rae to get it together or everyone would think she got her drunk before coming over. Rae assured her that she was fine and they walked over to the tables that'd been set up for the day's festivities. The trees gave shade to the area the tables were set up in so Rae moved her sunglasses on top of her head. She said hi to everyone and introduced them all to Simone.

Olivia stared at Rae as she went around saying hi to everyone. The noise seemed to fade as she fixated on her; the way her hair blew in the breeze, the way her shirt rode up her sides when she lifted her arms to give a hug, the magnitude of her smile, the glow of her skin and the shimmer of her eyes. She looked exquisite. Olivia wanted nothing more than to take her in her arms and kiss her until she didn't have breath. But she'd come with someone else. She knew that Rae said they were just friends but watching them walk in wrapped up in each other she couldn't help but think they were something more. Ashley and Maureen came over and pulled Rae off to the side to talk to her.

"Are you drunk?" Maureen asked. Rae shook her head, "No, of course not" she said laughing. They looked at her and she could tell that neither one of them was convinced. "I'm not drunk" she said seriously, "I had a few mimosas at breakfast but that was hours ago. I'm fine". Ashley could care less about her drinking. She had more important questions to ask. "Ummm, ok great. Next subject" she said moving the conversation along, "What is she doing here?" she said pointing to Simone. Rae slapped her hand down, "Ashley" she said chastising her for pointing. "She's here with me. We'd already planned to spend the day together when Maureen invited me. I wasn't gonna blow her off" she explained. "Ok, well what about you and Olivia?" Ashley asked, "You haven't even said hi to her" she pointed out. "I already told you about that. I haven't changed my mind" she said, "But I will say hi to her if it'll make you feel better". Ashley shrugged her shoulders, "It wouldn't hurt" she said looking at Maureen for back up. Maureen nodded in agreement, "Definitely wouldn't hurt". Rae rolled her eyes and turned around and they walked back over to the tables. Ashley and Maureen sat down and Rae walked over to where Olivia was sitting. She leaned down and wrapped her arms around her from behind.

"Hi' she whispered in her ear. A shiver went through Olivia as she felt the heat from Rae skin on hers and felt her breath on her ear. "Hi". She was barely able to get the word out of her mouth. Everyone tried to glance over at them without being too obvious that they were looking. "How are you today?" she asked softly. Her mouth went dry as she tried to speak, "Uh...I...I'm go..." she cleared her throat, "I'm good" she said finally completing her sentence. "Good". Rae gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before releasing her from her embrace and going over to say hi to Elliot and Kathy who were working on the food. Olivia stared at her as she talked to them, barely able to get her breath. Fin leaned over to her, "You better talk to her" he said, "today" he added. She just continued to stare as if he hadn't said anything. Rae came back over to the table and sat next to Simone. They talked and played monopoly at one table and cards at another. Elliot set up the volley ball net and Rae got up to play with Dickey, Elizabeth, Simone, Maureen and Scott who'd been the last to show up. They played games until Kathy and Elliot told them the food was ready. They all washed their hands and grabbed plates and filled them with food. Re sat at a table with Simone, Melinda, George, Kathleen and Fin. Ashley, Scott, John,Cragen, Maureen and Alex sat at the next table and Elliot, Kathy, Dickey, Elizabeth, and Olivia sat at the last table. Olivia stared at Rae from her end of the table and cringed a little every time Rae would let her head fall on Simone's shoulder as she laughed. She made up her mind then that she had to tell Rae the truth about why she'd ended their relationship. She couldn't let her fall for someone else. She needed to get her back.

Rae got up from the table and took her and Simone's plate inside to the trash. Olivia decided that it was now or never. She got up and followed her into the house but when she stepped into the kitchen Rae wasn't there. She figured she must have gone to the bathroom and decided she'd wait for her to come down. Everyone talked amongst themselves about what they thought was going on inside the house. By this time, they all knew that Rae and Simone were only friends and had let up on the evil stares they were giving her when she first arrived. They all hoped that Olivia had finally decided to tell Rae the truth and put an end all of their misery. Olivia waited for what felt like forever before going up the stairs and knocking on the bathroom door.

"Just a second" she heard Rae call out over the running water. The water shut off and not long after the door opened. Rae almost ran right into Olivia as she opened the bathroom door and stepped out. "Oh, I'm sorry" she said not expecting to see Olivia standing there. "It's ok" she said softly. She stared at the features of Rae's face and absentmindedly brought her hand up to cup her cheek. Without giving it much thought, Olivia brought their lips together and pushed her backward into the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind them. Just like the other night, they got lost in the feeling of each other. Their hands roamed all over and their tongues caressed. Olivia lifted Rae off the ground and pushed her back against the door. She opened her shirt with ease, moved her bra and took her left breast into her mouth. Rae moaned as Olivia sucked and flicked her nipple with her tongue. She gave the same attention to her right breast before turning and sitting her on the sink. Their mouths crashed back together and Olivia's hands began working on undoing Rae's shorts.

Rae knew she should stop her but she really didn't want to. But then again she couldn't do this with her, not like this. They'd been apart for over three months and she wasn't going to have random sex with her in the bathroom at her partner's cook out. That's not how she wanted them to get back together. Before she could say anything, Olivia's fingers slipped into her underwear and parted her folds, gathering the wetness that had accumulated and circled her clit. She let her head fall back against the mirror and moaned. "Damn it" she breathed out. Now it was going to be that much harder for her to stop Olivia from doing what she was doing. Little did they know Maureen had come inside to check on them and make sure they weren't at each other's throats. She was just about to knock when she heard Rae moan and curse through the bathroom door. She dropped her hand to her side and quietly descended the stairs and went back outside.

"Well" Ashley said when Maureen got back to the table, "Are they fighting?" Maureen shook her head, "No" she said simply. "Are they talking?" Fin asked. "Oh, I think they're doing a lot more than just talking" she said. "Yes! Finally" Ashley blurted out. "What? We're all thinking it" she said when she saw everyone staring at her. They all shrugged their shoulders, nodded and laughed. They all thought it was about time those two kissed and made up. Meanwhile, Rae was struggling to gather the strength to stop Olivia from going any further. It took every bit of will power she had to reach her hand between them and grab Olivia's wrist. She pulled her hand from her underwear and quickly hopped down form the sink, fixing her clothes. Olivia groaned in frustration at the sudden halt to their activities. Once Rae had pulled herself together, she went to open the bathroom door but Olivia blocked her way.

"What are you doing?" she asked. She needed to get out of the bathroom before she allowed something to happen that she wasn't ready for. "I wanted to talk to you" Olivia said. "That's why I followed you in here, in the house" she clarified. "I'm sorry. I just...I got carried away".

"Yeah, you and me both" she said with a small laugh. "What did you want to talk about?" she said crossing her arms over her chest. Olivia couldn't tear her eyes away from her tie-dyed bra. Even after she crossed her arms over her chest, she kept staring. "Liv" Rae said trying to get her attention. "Olivia!" she yelled. She finally snapped out of her trance and looked Rae in the eyes, "What did you want to talk about?" she repeated. "Uh, you said you wanted the truth about why I broke up with you". Rae waited quietly anticipating what Olivia was going to say. "I don't want you to be upset with her because I made my own decision. It was the wrong decision but it was mine. She thought she was doing what was right for you and I didn't want to be in the way. I love you so much and I wanted to do right by you and I just thought that..." Olivia's rambling made absolutey no sense to Rae. She put her hand up to stop her, "Olivia, what are you talking about? Who is "she"?" she asked confused. Olivia rubbed her face with her hands and took a deep breath. "Your mother" she whispered.

"What?" she asked softly. "Your mother talked to me and she asked me...well she didn't exactly ask me but I knew what she was saying. She thought she was doing what was best for you. Please don't be mad at her". Rae couldn't even put her thoughts together. She didn't understand what was happening. Her mother had done this? Her mother was the reason that Olivia left her? It just didn't make any sense. "No, that's not...she wouldn't...my mother?" she asked in disbelief. "I'm sorry baby" Olivia took a step closer to Rae but she backed away. "What did she say to you?" Olivia looked down at her hands and avoided answering the question. "You said she didn't exactly ask you. What did she say that made you think she wanted you to break up with me?" Olivia really didn't think that was important. She really just wanted to move on from this and have her girlfriend back, "Araeyah, I...". Rae could feel an excuse coming on and she didn't want to hear, "Olivia what did she say?" she asked again. From her tone of voice, Olivia knew she didn't have any choice but to answer. "She said that it was her fault that you'd grown up so fast and that she didn't want you to have so much responsibility anymore; that she didn't want you to be settling down. She said now was your chance to be young and carefree and she wanted to give you that chance. I guess she thought talking to me was the only way she could do it".

Rae couldn't believe that her mother had done this. She'd gone behind her back and meddled in her life and her meddling had left her heartbroken. She couldn't that after three months of seeing her unhappy she didn't tell her the truth; that she didn't take responsibility for her part in it. She would most definitely be having a talk with her mother. She didn't know what effect that would have on their relationship but the talk was going to happen, whatever the consequences. "Thank you" she said softly, "for telling me. I understand why that was hard for you". Olivia had always beamed over Rae's relationship with her mother. She loved the fact that she'd rather be unhappy than see Rae hurt by the only parent she had left. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Olivia's waist and laid her head on her chest. Olivia relaxed and returned the embrace. The talk had gone a lot better than she thought it would but she suspected that this was the quiet before the storm. She hated to imagine what the talk between Rae and her mother would be like. Rae pulled back from their hug, "We should get back out there. Everyone's probably wondering where we disappeared to". Olivia nodded and opened the door. She led the way down the stairs and back outside to the back yard.

All eyes were on them as they emerged from the house and walked back over to join everyone. Olivia took her seat at the table and Rae went over and sat at the other end. There was a weird vibe in the air but nobody wanted to say anything about it. They resumed the games they were playing before they'd stopped to eat and everyone was having a good time. The glances back and forth between Rae and Liv didn't go unnoticed by the group. They had no idea what had gone on in the house but whatever it was it didn't seem like they had worked through all their issues. They decided to split up into two teams and play a big game of volleyball. They had an uneven number of players so Olivia opted to sit out. She wasn't really in the mood to play. They finished their first game and were starting on their second when Rae walked over and sat down next to Olivia.

"So...what do you say we give this another try?" she asked casually, looking at their friends continue their game of volleyball. Olivia smiled and nodded her head, "I'd like that" she said happily. "What do we call each other?" she asked. Olivia burst into laughter remembering that they'd had this conversation before. 'What do you mean?" she asked playing along. "I mean, when I talk about you to other people or when you talk about me, what do we refer to each other as?" Olivia pretended to think about it and just like before. Araeyah interrupted her thought process, "Are we friends with benefits, lovers, fuck buddies?" Olivia scoffed, "Fuck buddies. Is that all I am to you?" she asked pretending to take offense. "I don't know" she said looking her the eyes, "Is that all you want to be?". Olivia held her gaze and shook her head, "No" she said softly. "Well, then what are you?" Olivia rested her forehead against Araeyah's, "I'm your girlfriend" she whispered. Rae smiled, "Good". She brought their lips together in a sweet, loving kiss. They were so caught up in each other they didn't realize that their friends had stopped playing volleyball and were watching them until they heard clapping and cheering from across the backyard. They laughed at their excitement before resuming their kiss. "I love you" Olivia whispered with her lips still touching Rae's. "I love you back".