Greetings Aca-mortals. I know, another update? Yeah, I'm just that fucking awesome. Everything is being pushed out for Bullshit Week. School, work, other writing, everything is being ignored for the duration of this week. Sorry aca-peeps who this effects, but I REALLY hate Valentines Day week, so this is me coping XD

This was prompted by the lovely and aca-awesome immortal cxcxcx368, and cuz she's always nice to me, I took her prompt. See? Being nice to me has its perks :) Becky, you're prompt will be next... or right after who ever was the first reviewer on the last chapter.

Disclaimers are like my writing and Valentines day. Absolute bullshit. Howeer, don't have the money to pay for a lawsuit, so I own nothing. Happy now aca-fuckers?

Pairing: none

Category: Humor

Rating: K+

Beca cursed. Fuck fuck fuck fuck, this was not good. In exactly half an hour, she was due at the Bella's rehearsal space so that they could go to the semi-finals and right now, her skirt was completely fucked up. That damn zipper wouldn't fucking zip, and she needed it to, and it just wasn't working! Dammit, this was bad. Aubrey would fucking kill her if she was late, and really, Beca didn't want to die, at least, not at the hands of the aca-nazi. Beca had no doubt that Aubrey would make her death long and painful if she was late and really, Beca would like to avoid that if at all possible, thank you very much.

Hell, that was why she was in Aubrey and Chloe's apartment right now! Aubrey had insisted that Beca's lack of work ethic for anything other then her music and her remarkable ability to forget important day meant that she was at risk of forgetting what day the Semi Finals were. Which was totally true, but still, if she was late now, that would meant her death would only be that much more painful. Aubrey and Chloe had just left a few minutes ago to get everything ready, after Aubrey gave her a lecture about the importance punctuality of course. Which Beca had snapped wasn't necessary... but now, it might be.

"Fuck!" Beca growled as she tugged on the broken zipper, "Why the hell won't you zip fucker?"

With ad angry growl, Beca flopped down onto the couch. Fuck, this was bad, this was so very bad. What the hell was she going to do now? There was no way in hell she was going to perform with a broken fucking zipper, but at the same time, if she didn't get moving soon, Aubrey was going to kill her. So what was she going to do? Suddenly, Beca had a stoke of absolute brilliance

"Ohmigod, YES!" Beca said jumping up.

Dashing over to Aubrey's desk, Beca rummaged around for the item she was looking for. With a triumphant hoot, Beca pulled out Aubrey's roll of tape. Ha! If that fucking zipper wasn't going to zip, she was going to stick the fucker together! Pulling a piece off, Beca stuck the two ends together with the tape. However, the second she took a step, the fucking tape bond broke and once again, there was a large gap where her zipper should be zipped. God dammit, this was bad, so very fucking bad.

Pulling another piece of tape off the roll, Beca tried and stick the zipper together again. Once again, her attempt was met with failure. Fuck it! This was so fucking annoying. Growling, Beca was so immersed in her task that she didn't hear the apartment door open as Aubrey and Chloe walked in to get Beca until it was too late.

"What in the aca-name of the great aca-gods are you doing Beca?" Aubrey shrieked as she walked in to the room.

"DUDE!" Beca yelled, shooting up in surprise.

Seeing the murderous look on Aubrey's face and Chloe beside her, trying her best not to laugh, Beca's face immediate turned a deep scarlet color. Fumbling with the tape in her hands, Beca looked at Aubrey sheepishly.

"Well hey Aubrey," Beca squeaked, "How's it going?"

"Shove it Mitchell," Aubrey snapped, "Now, would you like to tell me what you were doing with MY tape and why you are not down in the practice room yet? And swear to the aca-gods, if you do not have a good explanation, I will rip your vocal chords out."

"Umm... no?" Beca guessed, however the look on Aubrey's face was enough to get Beca to start confessing, "I'm sorry, Bree. I really was going to be on time, but then my zipper wouldn't zip, and I didn't know what to do, so I tried to tape it! But then, that wasn't working because the fucking tape wouldn't stay, and I was trying, I really was, but like I said, it didn't work, so here we are now, and ohmygodpleasedon'tripmyvocalchordsout!"

For a second, no one moved. Beca was panting slightly from her rushed confession, Aubrey looked like she was trying to process everything Beca had just said, and Chloe was staring blankly at Beca. Then Chloe burst out laughing, and both Aubrey and Beca stared quizzically at the now howling red head. For a full minute Chloe just laughed until shew as able to compose herself enough to talk.

"Oh my God Beca, you're such a dork," Chloe said giggling, "Why didn't you just use chapstick?"

"Wait, what?" Beca asked, "Why would I use chapstick?"

"Because silly, that's how you undo a stuck zipper!" Chloe said as though the answer should have been obvious.

"Wait, seriously?" Beca asked, "So I was freaking out for nothing?"

"No, because after the semi finals, I'm going to kill you for being late and now making us late," Aubrey snapped. Pulling out a stick of chapstick, she handed it to Beca, "I can't aca-freaking believe that you didn't know that Beca. Honestly, did you really think taping you skirt together would actually work? That is honestly the most absurd thing I have ever heard. Everyone knows that chapstick is how you unstick a zipper! Not tape! Sometimes, you really do surprise me with how absolutely idiotic you can be."

"Well sorry! Obviously not everyone knows that," Beca mumbled, taking the offered chapstick, "So what do I do with this now?"

"You put it one the zipper dumbass!" Chloe laughed, "Oh my gosh, you're not a bad ass, you're a DUMB-ass!"

"And you're just an ass," Beca grumbled.

Putting the chapstick on the stuck zipper, Beca was surprised to see that yes, using chapstick really did work. Gliding up, her zipper finally zipped, and she was now, as Aubrey called it, performance ready. Letting out a sigh oft, Beca smiled.

"Alright, we all good here," Beca said, "Let's go."

"Finally!" Aubrey snapped, "I swear to god Mitchell, you're such an idiot sometimes."

"Whatever," Beca sighed as she walked to the door.

Holding the door for the two seniors, Beca sighed. Today was going to suck, hard. She just knew it. It wasn't even noon and Aubrey as already pissed at her. Just fucking lovely. Not only that, but they were going to the semi finals where she'd have to sing and dance to the most boring set list known to man. Also, her zipper didn't want to zip, so obviously, that was a bad omen for the day. Hey, don't judge! Omens were serious shit.

Walking out the door, Beca followed Aubrey and Chloe down to the bus, fiddling with her newly unstuck zipper the whole way.

Aaaaaand cut! So that as that. Short, I know, but whatevers. I can't always bullshit 5000+ words! Deal the aca-fuck with it :) As always, keep those reviews coming, and maybe I may even update again by the end of today XD