Greetings mortals! So this brilliant piece has been brought to you by the one and only waatp! Gys, fucking outstanding author, and I encourage you to go read her stuff. BTW, the two of us will be coming out with a kick ass fic soon, so I also recommend you follow and fave her, cuz guys, its going to be fucking awesome :)

Also, under her recommendation, Bullshit week is now bullshit life. Until I stop writing on this site, I' just goign to keep BSW open. Won't update everyday, but I'll take prompts and write some when I feel like it. Cool?

So now, with out further ado, I bring you Pirate Day by the one and only Waatp.

"You want me to do ... what ... tomorrow?" Beca asked, cocking her head to one side as she stood by the front door with her hand on the doorknob reading to leave, laptop bag already hanging from her shoulder and her headphones slung over the crook of her arm.

"Dress up like a pirate silly." Chloe answered, playfully patting Beca on the shoulder, clearly ignoring the 'no touching' rule Beca had decided to enforce the previous week, slightly afraid for her safety under Chloe's repeated sneak attacks.

"Why?"

"Because it's 'Act Like A Pirate Day' tomorrow and because I want you to."

"Dude, did you just make that up?"

"No, it's a thing."

"Acting like a pirate is a 'thing' now." Beca said, air quoting as sarcastically as she could, bending her knees to emphasis the mockery.

"Oh totes!" Chloe completely ignoring the snark, took a step towards Beca who shrank back into the shadows of the front door.

"Dude, spatial awareness. Back off."

"Agree to it and I will." Chloe said with a twinkle in her eye, a slight twist to her mouth.

"OK, fine! I'll think about it." Beca huffed, turning back towards the door, fumbling at the handle, reassuring herself of an escape route. "If you dare make me walk the plank or ..."

"Oooh, hadn't thought of that activity."

"Wait, what? There are activities?"

"Yep, ask Amy."

"Oh my God! Dressing up and activities? ... Can't we ever just have a normal day around here?"

"And we've got themed foods and drinking games too." Chloe said, completely ignoring Beca's attitude.

Beca groaned and thought how ridiculous this all was. She was desperately trying to think of a way to get out of joining in without looking like the jerk that she knew she was. She didn't want to disappoint her girlfriend's best friend though. She rolled her eyes, catching Chloe looking at her mid eye roll.

"Beca, do you really not want to do it? It's only a bit of fun. You don't have to, you know? It was only supposed to be a theme for an early birthday party for Amy. She said she was related to Blackbeard or something so we thought we'd combine the two. Forget I asked." Chloe looked crestfallen, frowning slightly as she looked at her feet, making eyes towards Beca through her lashes.

"Oh queerballs, OK, I'll do it. Jeez. Anything to stop that face." Beca conceded, all too slightly aware of the speed of the effect that Chloe's sad face was having on her resolve. "What time?"

"We're starting at 6!" Chloe said, snapping her head up, clapping her hands together and leaning in to quickly peck Beca's cheek, before she turned in a swift movement, snapping her fingers above her head as she walked away. "See you later!"

Beca was pretty sure she had just been played.

Aubrey stood in front of the full length mirror in her bedroom, turning to the left and then twisting to the right, checking that her outfit was suitable. She needed to look the part, especially if Beca had been persuaded to join in, and Aubrey had rejected several of Chloe's ideas to turn her into Captain Hook, favouring a more subtly approach to the madness outside. She had been hiding in her room all day, avoiding the pleas to come and help and waiting for the last minute before getting ready. Aubrey had never felt so uncomfortable in her life. And that included Puke-Gate.

She opened the door of her bedroom, shutting it softly behind her, trying to retain some sort of dignity in Stacie's six inch, knee high boots leant to her solely for the purpose of her outfit. She had teamed the boots with a tight, black leather mini skirt (borrowed from Chloe), four inches shorter than her usual military inspection length, which fitted her form and showed off her long legs perfectly. She also wore what she could only describe as a 'frilly' white shirt, tapered at the waist, along with a tight black leather waistcoat of Chloe's that she never wanted to know why she had it. Chloe had managed to persuade Aubrey into a push up bra. Her hair was soft and curly around her shoulders and she has succumbed to a jauntily patterned skull and crossbones bandana, lazily tied to complete her outfit.

She tried to make a silent descent towards the kitchen to down a couple of shots to make the evening more bearable because aca-Gods, she didn't quite understand why they were hosting a party about calloused and ugly sea-dogs but her ginger stalker was on high alert and grabbed her around the waist as she slipped down the corridor.

"Oh my God! Bree! You look stunning. Do a twirl?" Chloe released her grip on the blondes' waist, taking a step back to admire her friends outfit.

"I need a drink." Was all that Aubrey was able to offer in reply, refusing to spin around.

"OK grumpy pants! Everyone is here. Amy's already spiked the punch." Chloe said, turning around and heading back downstairs. Aubrey observed her best friends outfit for a moment and wondered how a simple pair of black jeans, black boondockers and a whimsical stripy tee shirt with anchors on passed for an outfit. True Chloe had accessorised with skull earrings and some black leather jewellery, and the obligatory red spotted handkerchief on her head, but was that all.

"Great." Aubrey pouted towards Chloe's retreating form. "Are you dressed by the way? Is that your outfit?"

"Yes." Chloe paused at the bottom of the stairs, turning to look at Aubrey as she glided down the steps, taking her time with the heels. "Why?"

Aubrey didn't know what to say so she chewed her lip for a moment.

"Oh! Why haven't I gone to town? Well, you are wearing half of my outfit, I didn't have time to get anything else and because I've set up everything this afternoon on my own because my best friend was sulking in her bedroom!" Chloe continued, completely without malice or hint of regret.

"Chloe ...!"

"Bree, it's a party, lighten up! Come on!" Chloe said laughing as she pulled on Aubrey's hand towards the living room, pausing for a moment before clearing her throat for a dramatic effect. "Ladies, I give you our Pirate leader, Captain Posenberry, high villain of the seven seas."

It took a moment for Aubrey to take in the room that Chloe had decorated and she felt guilty. Chloe had decorated the room with flags, decorations and props, probably stolen from the campus' drama department, Tom, her boyfriend, being the head of the drama club. She had made papier-mache chests, filled with chocolate coins, fashioned 'loot' bags over furniture, strung up palm trees and even found the front of a boat which had been festooned with rope and plastic crabs.

Aubrey looked around at her fellow Bellas who were currently whooping and cheering at her arrival and she smiled at them all, before crossing the room to sample some of Amy's punch. She was just spooning some into one of the disposable cups when she was confronted with a very odd looking pirate.

"Ahoy me heartie." Beca deadpanned, clearly enjoying the fact that Aubrey was as uncomfortable as she was.

"Oh my God! Beca! You look ... you look ... adorable!" Aubrey laughed as she pulled her in for a swift, soft kiss on her lips.

"Mmmph ... adorablemph ...letmegomph ..." Beca said into Aubrey's kiss. Aubrey pulled back and looked down at her girlfriend of eighteen months.

"You do! Did you make the hat yourself?" Aubrey asked, taking in Beca's outfit. Consisting of her trademark black skinny jeans and her black combat boots, Aubrey noticed that she had made a set of lapels to go over the boots and had decorated them with silver marker pen. Taking in the rest of Beca's outfit she saw that Beca had coloured in her own stripes on a white vest top, tying a red scarf around her waist and throwing on a black sleeveless shirt to complete the ensemble. But it was the endearing homemade pirate hat and the drawn on pirate moustache that made Aubrey realise just how much she loved Beca. The hat, made of craft paper and stuck together with copious amounts of sticky tape was topped off with a badly drawn silver skull and cross bones. Something that a five year old would be proud of.

"I didn't want you to feel weird about this. I know you don't like pirates all that much. With those weird nightmares you have. I had to do something about your hatred for pirates."

"They are growing on me. Come here!" Aubrey said, pulling her in for another kiss, Beca really having to stretch up to reach Aubrey's lips.

"I must say Captain Posenberry, that's a fine treasure chest you have there." Beca said and Aubrey looked down at her smaller girlfriend, who seemed to be having trouble making eye contact, her boots kicking the floor.

"Beca Mitchell ... joining in with the lingo! Nice! Christ Aubrey, you wanna put those bad boys away ... you're putting me off me rum punch." Amy stepped in, eyepatch sitting somewhere on her left cheek, ruining the moment and taking in the sight of Aubrey's goodies all in one go. Aubrey threw her head back and elicited a dirty laugh, something that made Beca's stomach lurch a little.

"Come on, you two scurvy sea-dogs, time for a game."

"What do you call an insane pirate?" Amy asked to the room. She was clearly enjoyed the twenty fifth round of pirate jokes, her being the only one to know any of them. "Bizarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre."

"Amy, stop!"

"Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? ... Because they can spend years at 'C'!"

"Amy ..."

"OK... here is a good one. Knock Knock ..."

"Who's there." CR called back, hoping to get this over and done with.

"Interrupting pirate."

"Interrup ..."

"ARRRRRRR!"

"Someone kill me!" Stacie yelled.

"I'm the best pirate joke teller in Tasmania, without being insane. What did the Pirate on Wheel of Fortune say?" Amy paused to look to see if anyone was going to answer. "I'd like to buy an Aye!"

"Oh God."

"Why did the pirate go to the Apple Store then? ... anyone ... OK then ... to buy an iPatch."

"No more."

"Where did the one legged Pirate go for breakfast? ... The iHop!"

"Sssssh, we are all too drunk to care now."

"What has eight legs and eight eyes?" Amy asked, clearly not listening to the protests. "Eight pirates!"

The collective groans around her spurred Amy to take another drink before she continued.

"OK, last one and then we'll start the games. There was a reporter interviewing a retired buccaneer about his many years living at sea. As she understood it, he had lead a very long and exciting life. Trying to find an exciting story, she started the interview by asking, "So, Captain, how did you get your peg leg?" The Captain responded, "I got too drunk one night and broke me' ankle. The ship doesn't ha'e a doctor, so we cut it off and put the leg on tharrrr." The reporter was disappointed, because she had expected a more exciting story. Not to be discouraged, she would move on to her next question, asking him how he had gotten the hook on his hand. He responded, " 'Twas me night to cook and I wasn't paying attention when cuttin' the food. Like before, we didn't ha'e no doctor te fix me up, so we put the hook on therrrrre." Once again, the story had been less exciting than the reporter had hoped. In a final act of desperation, she asked about the patch on his eye, to which he explained, "I was out on the deck lookin' at the sea when a seagull flew overhead and its droppin's fell clear into me eye." The reporter was confused. "That's why you wear a patch on your eye?" The Captain responded, "Well, I'd only had me hook for a few days!"

"Enough Amy, enough!" Chloe cried out, desperate to do anything else but listen to another one of Amy's jokes or stories.

"Oh you land lubbers are no match for me. I might have to call Bump later and see if he has any interest in dropping his anchor in my lagoon."

"Gross Amy!"

"Ahoy then, what game's next? Or shall we put on an RRRRRRR rated movie? With booty calls?"

Beca had been watching Aubrey all night, thoroughly enjoying watching her girlfriend finally relax after a week of mock exams. She downed the rest of her drink, wiping the dregs from her lips with the back of her hand. She crossed the room, catching Aubrey's eye as she snaked around her friends semi-lifeless bodies, splayed out on the floor, too tired to move after 10 hours of partying and Amy's jokes. Chloe looked up at her as she approached the two best friends.

"Ahoy, there First Mate."

"Ahoy Captain, room for me to board there?" Beca asked, as she dropped her eyes to Aubrey's lap.

"Aye. Aye." Aubrey replied, settling her knees for Beca to slip onto her lap. She ran a hand around her girlfriends shoulders, pulling her in to her chest, a view Beca thoroughly enjoyed.

"Aww, you've joined in the spirit of it finally!" Chloe clapped her hands together, excited as a puppy.

"Don't you mean arrrrrr?"

"Beca Mitchell, making a funny! I'm going to call it a night. Goodnight you two, see you in the morning." Chloe whispered, sneaking a kiss to their cheeks, before slipping out of the living up to her bedroom, opposite Aubrey's upstairs.

"Are you sleepy Beca?" Aubrey asked as she tucked a small kiss to the top of Beca's forehead.

"Depends on what you have in mind?"

"Want to have a 'whale' of a time?"

"Ha, Amy is a bad influence on you! Let's slip away while they're watching Pirates of the Caribbean ... which, can I just say screams cliché!"

Aubrey laughed, standing up in her bare feet holding Beca in her arms, her boots look since discarded. She muttered a good night to those that were still awake as they watched Johnny Depp challenge Captain Barbosa and made quick work of the stairs to her bedroom. Pushing the door shut with her hip, she placed Beca gently on her bed, making short work of pulling off Beca's boots and jeans. Beca moaned and lifted her lips to Aubrey's neck, causing the blonde to stiffen under the attack. She felt Beca' breath in her ear.

"Roger me senseless Captain."

"Prepare to be boarded."

And Beca tucked a grin onto Aubrey's cheek. Maybe pirate day wasn't too bad after all.