Harry Poter Uses Facebook for the First Time Chapter 10
chapter title is the whompin willow
harry was drunk and crashed into the whomping willow near the school of hogwards. the car was destroyed!
"oh my god oh my god ho my god." harry said. he threw up some more because he was drunk.
"harry what is it that you just did is very bad, my dad is going to be super fucking pissed! because it's his car!" ron said.
"ron just shut up we can fix the car with magic or something ok." harry said. he was crying a lot.
they got the charred remains of the fuckin car out of the tree. it was on fire.
harry and ron tried to spit on it to put the fire out.
harry threw up on the fire to put the fire out but it didn't work.
"ITS NOT FUCKING WORKING!" ron screamed.
"rainius antanius!" hermione said and it rained o nteh car.
"oh wow thanks herminoone." harry said.
"fixus dickus" ron said and the car was fixed!
"oh wow i forgot you knew that spell haha' harry said.
ron punched harry in the face.
"shut up kid this is all your fault!" ron said.
"yeah harry." herminone said.
"HEY HEY HEY. i'm sorry" harry said.
"hey potter, you're someone who is in the big trouble now!" someone said.
it was... draco malfoy.
"what do you want malfag?" harry said.
"i know you threw that party and i'm gonna tell on you!" malfog said.
"no!" harry said and screamed.
"hahahahaha...hahahaa...hahahahaha...ha...ha...hahahahahahaha!" malfoy said evilly and deviously.
harry tackled malfoy and started punching him.
"hermy run for help! Plesaer do this for us herminoe!" harry screamed.
"ok" she said and ran away.
"oh no you don't you mud blood bitch!" malfoy said. he cast a spell that frozed hermione!
it was now harry and ron against malfoy and crab and goil. they were out numbereded!
"oh nononon!" ron said!
harry looked and saw the lake near hogwartz.
"SWIM RONNY SWIMMY!" harry said as he ran twoards the lake and swimmed in it away from malyof crab and goil.
they both jumped into the lake and swum as fast as they could.
malfy was about to go in a lake but heard a voice.
"DRACO YOU FAG WHATRE YA DOING?"
it was...dumbleford!
"we're going to kill that mudblood potter and his ginger fuck friend! i mean nothing." malfoy said.
"i don't think so malfoy. you were the one who threw that party, i know it was you." dumbledore said.
"please no it wasnt it was that potter! not fucking me!" malfoy said.
"i don't believe you because you're a stupid piece of shit and a lier." dumbledore said with a mean angry look on his face.
"no albus. please you cannot do fucking this to me!" malfoy said as he got on his knees.
"one million points from slityherin! hahahaha" dumbledore said.
"you motherfucker..." malfoy said.
"WHAT DID YOU FUCKING CALL ME?" dumbledord said.
"you fucking heard me you fag. get him boys." malfoy said as crab and goiled attacked mumbeldore!
they pushed him down and started punching him. harry and ron were watching from the lake.
"professor dumbledore!" they both said.
"oh no you didn't malfag." harry said.
"Yeah!" ron said.
"hey malfag!" harry yelled.
"g'whant?" malfoy siad.
"what's wet and hurts you? water!" harry said. he threw water from the lake to malfoy and it got in his eyes! that gave the dumbler a chance to get up and punch malfoy in the throat.
"awk..." malfoy said. he was coughing up blood.
crab and goil ran away because they were really scared.
"thanks harry and ron for saving my ass." dumbledore said.
"your welcome professy." ron said.
"one hundred points to gryfinnder. and as for this motherfucker, he's going to be going to wizards jail for a bit or a long time for fucking hitting me!" dumbledore screamed loudly at malfoy.
malfoy was crying in fear of albus.
"now you boys get back to your doritory." albus dumbledore said.
"ok thanks professir." harry said. they ran back to the dorm as albus got hermione out of the freezing spell and started to beat malfoy.
"what a crazy night bro." harry said.
"i know im gonna have such a bad fucking hangover!" ron said.
"but we can use your dad's car now to drive to hogsmeed!" harry said.
"no way bro, we need to return it you know what i'm saying." ron said.
"your such a runt ron! he won't even notice it's gone!" harry said.
"ok." ron said.
they said the pass-word (which was actually "ASS-WORD" hee hee hee") and went into the dorm.
"hello you stupid motherfuckers." neville said. he was sitting all by himself and smoking a joint.
"n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-nevlle?" ron said. he wet himself.
neville turned the light on. ron's pants were soaked.
"yeah it's fucking me. and you both are dead for beating me up at the party." neville said. he then pulled out... a fucking gun and pointed it at harry and ron!
"AH" harry and ron screamed.