Wings to Fly

The two groups soon became one and in the next few months, they all became good friends. To everyone except Mikan, it was obvious that Nastume Hyuuga was hopelessly in love with her. He did not say it or ever discussed it with anyone, but his actions and his behaviour towards her was so pathetically love-struck that even Hotaru pitied him.

Even after almost two years of hanging out, he did not dare to pursue Mikan. The others did not understand why he waited. Why he never went for someone else. They did not know he was the one who had bullied Mikan in High School. She never told anyone.

And if Mikan harboured any romantic feelings towards him, she never said. She often blushed, that was true, but that was because she never had a boyfriend before – Natsume knew that. It had been his fault to start with.

In High School, he did have a slight crush on her and he did tease her at the beginning just to get her attention, but after some time, his bullying side got the better of him and he and his friends just… He will never understand what had been going on with him that time. The point was that throughout high school, Mikan never had a boyfriend because she had been traumatized from the bullying; and throughout her university years, she was healing from that. She still had some problems with communicating with people, but she was mostly all right.

She did not flinch anymore, she did not avoid crowds, and she did not have any panic attacks. She was again a happy-go-lucky girl.

When Mikan received her diploma at the end of her three-year university education, she cried with joy. Her classmates were in the same state as she was, and Natsume and his group that still had a year to go, congratulated them sincerely. Even Anna and Nonoko came to stay with Mikan and her friends. They hugged and shook hands, and the youth was in such good spirits that they celebrated their graduation by dancing at the festival nearby.

The night flew away with the friends drinking and fooling around, remembering things during their university time. Mikan did not drink; she sipped at her juice and laughed at her friends making fools of themselves. Natsume kept her company for some time and they spent the night watching and later on dancing with the group.

It was the happiest night of Mikan's life.

''How do you feel now?'' Hotaru asked her, as she came to have a drink.

Mikan stared at her happy, crazy friends and then up into the starry sky. ''I'm very very happy.'' She said and smiled. ''I'm glad I met you guys. And I'm glad we mixed together with Natsume's group. I honestly never thought something like this would happen. I'm…'' and her eyes welled up with happy tears. ''I'm really, really happy now.''

Hotaru threw her arm around Mikan laughingly and pulled her closer, pushing Mikan's head into her shoulder to hide those tears. Mikan giggled, wiping away the tears and hugged Hotaru. When they broke away, Mikan felt someone's eyes on her and glanced towards her friends. Anna and Nonoko were smiling at her, giving her thumbs up for making such progress. Mikan laughed, not noticing another pair of eyes; not until she glanced his way and realized he was also smiling at her. She waived to him and he waived back then turned away as Tono pulled him back into the dancing circle.

As Mikan came back home that night, her mother sleeping, she leaned on the door for a few moments and watched her mother. She wore a content smile on face. There was no need for her mother to worry about her anymore. She finally had control over her life. She finished school and she had friends. She would start searching for a job, maybe travel for some time and then… Who knows…

She was ready to take up the world.

She was ready to face the adulthood and be the one to take care of herself and her mother.

She would make it.

She knew it.

And the first step she made, was sending around job applications to every possible design company. Of course she did not get a chance right away. While she could do nothing but wait, she decided to visit different places around Japan that she had never been to. Sometimes Anna and Nonoko came with her, and sometimes it were Natsume, Hotaru, Tsubasa, and Misaki.

They all visited Kyoto, Takayama, Magome, and even Okinawa. With traveling rucksacks on their backs and hats on their heads to prevent sunburn, they climbed up the Fuji and took pictures and videos, and at the end of the next year, Mikan made so many beautiful memories, she was even more happy.

If her high school life had been one horrible nightmare, her university and post-university life was pure bliss. Her photo albums were getting thicker, her traveling diary full, and her shelves decorated with many souvenirs.

She finally got a job offer as an assistant trainee in one of the designing companies and she could not believe her luck. In the meantime, Natsume and his classmates graduated from university and were about to walk into the real life.

They all were growing up into adults. Mikan felt herself changing, and sometimes it scared her, but mostly, she was glad she made it through. Her confidence became bigger; she was focused and hard-working; but most of all, she had to admit to herself that her emotions changed too.

She knew exactly when her feelings for Natsume developed into more than just friendship. She did not see it coming – she had to admit that. She thought that her former bully would only stay her friend. She guessed it had something to do with him behaving like that towards her. Like a lovesick puppy.

At first she thought she felt into that psychological trap, as she heard from her therapist – many victims developed a bound with their torturer, mistaking it with love. And at that time she relaxed, because she knew that if she realized the problem, she would be able to solve it. But it turned out what she felt was not just a simple bound; it were in fact very strong emotions.

She felt attracted to him; she wanted to spend more time with him; and she loved to talk with him. The person he became was someone she respected and admired. And in-between hanging out with him and working for school, her heart started beating faster, her cheeks blushed, and warmth spread all over her chest whenever she so much as thought of him.

She did not act upon her feelings. She was unsure, shy, and inexperienced. She was afraid of showing her affections. She knew he felt something for her; he showed it on more than just one occasion. But there were times she remembered those awful moments in high school, and she retreated back into her shell, too frightened to peek out.

She knew it was not fair that she was hiding herself. She should let the past behind her and move on, but she was still unsure. Not quite ready. She was waiting for him to do something - if he decided to. It was not as if she knew what she wanted. She had never experienced love like that, so she did not miss it. But she longed for such happiness and she – if she ever gathered enough courage to admit it out loud – would like to experience such happiness with Natsume.

Even just thinking about it made her giddy and nervous. But mostly, it made her blush.

She never dared to talk about this with anyone. She talked about Natsume's change with Anna and Nonoko, and she discussed her friendship with him with Hotaru and Misaki, but her affections stayed unmentioned.

She felt uncomfortable talking about this with someone who was not him. And to actually tell him… She was not there yet. She was not ready… She wanted to heal and live before making another step.

She would somehow make it.

Maybe…

And the evening after Natsume and his friends received their diploma certificates, the huge group decided to celebrate by once again visit a spring festival. They would all wear traditional yukatas and walk around.

They guys were waiting for the girls to come and soon they did. Natsume obviously froze, and blinked. There she was, walking towards them, a bright smile on her face, a flowery yukata hugging her body perfectly, and her dreamy voice reaching his ears.

''Close your mouth, Hyuuga.'' Chuckled Tsubasa and Natsume quickly shut his mouth, and gulped.

''Hey, guys.'' Greeted the girls and mingled among them. Mikan smiled shyly at everyone and stopped next to Natsume. ''Hey…'' she greeted him and the poor boy gulped one more time. ''H-hey… You look good.''

''Thank you. You too.''

''So where should we go first?'' they heard Hotaru's voice and turned to her. ''Let's play first and then see the fireworks.'' Suggested Anna and smiled.

''Sure.''

And they walked around, playing games at the stands, and ate delicious food. They talked and laughed, and Mikan felt so happy she could die. She noticed Natsume did not leave her side at all, even waited for her when she had ot go to the toilet. He was entertaining her with his funny stories from school and jokes, and stared at her whenever he had the chance.

Mikan felt the flattering in her chest the whole evening and she thought to herself if the time has come. She thought about it for a very long time. It's been years now, and she healed. She tried to come up with pros and cons for this matter, but in the end her heart knew what it wanted. She knew he was a different person from how he used to be – he proved that many times, and she knew she should finally let him know – he had been waiting, frightened to do something about it long enough.

But it seemed he thought the same.

As they watched their friends fooling around and the two of them waited for the group at the side, next to an old stone railing, Natsume finally spoke up.

''Hey… May I… May I talk to you for a moment?'' he asked nervously, his voice a little shaky. Mikan's heart went wild and she had a feeling she knew what this was about. She blinked, thinking of something to postpone the act. ''Sure… Let me just get Hotaru and tell her that we'll go to the benches.''

She gave him that heart-warming smile and turned away to walk forward, but then she felt his hand pull at hers and she turned back at him in confusion.

''Natsume?''

He looked at her with so much desperation and desire that she could feel it. He felt frustrated and he simply could not hold it in anymore.

''Mikan…'' he started, his voice weak and pleading. ''Please… Please let me tell you. I can't- I just want you to know.''

''No.'' Was her immediate reply, and Natsume felt his world crumble.

''Let me tell you Natsume.'' She suddenly smiled gently, and pulled both of his hands to her lips and kissed them. Natsume stared at her in awe and breathed faster, his heart beating faster than before.

''I've been very mean, Natsume. I admit it. Since we started to get along, I held you at arm's length and I'm aware how much emotional pain I caused you. Because I know, Natsume, I know…'' she whispered softly and kissed his hands one more time.

''I started to like you a long time ago; you were my first crush in high school, and you were the first one to break my heart. But you healed it again, Natsume. I like you. And it's quickly turning into love. And I think I'd like you to show me more about it.''

Natsume could not hold himself back anymore. He leaned down slowly, letting her know what he was about to do and Mikan closed her eyes, meeting him halfway. They kissed. They finally kissed and Natsume felt so happy he thought he could die. He was aware that Mikan never kissed anyone before, but she let him show her how it is done. He hugged her around her hips with one arm and with the other, he held her nape, pressing her closer. He felt her quick heartbeat and her hot skin under his fingers, and felt so very happy that his chest ached.

When they pulled apart, Mikan looked at him with those doe eyes and he buried his face into her shoulder, mumbling how much he loved her. Mikan felt him cry against her skin, she felt hot tears run down her own cheeks too, and they both cried in each other's arms.

''Mikan, Mikan, Mikan…'' he chatted, kissing that spot on her slightly exposed shoulder and then kissed her on the lips again. Then he hugged her again and they stayed that way, intertwined in each other's arms for a very long time.

''I'm sorry, Natsume, to have made you wait so long.''

''No, no, no… It was deserved. I did such awful things to you and others… I never even imagined you'd-''

''I'm in love with you, Natsume.'' Mikan interrupted him, pulling away to look him in the eyes. She was so beautiful, Natsume thought, his heart almost bursting.

''I'm in love with you.'' He whispered back to her and smiled. He laughed out, something she had never seen, and picked her up to whirl her around. Mikan laughed and shrieked, ignoring all the curious and giggling stares the two of them received.

After a very long time, they decided to find their friends and once they did, everyone was already smiling at them knowingly. Mikan was blushing like mad, while Natsume grinned like a love-struck fool. The rest of the night they spend in each other's arms, either walking around, or sitting on the grass among other couples and watching the fireworks. Natsume kissed her whenever he got the chance and slowly Mikan got used to such caress and enjoyed it all. She felt his warmth around her and she felt his lips kissing her head, his fingers playing with her hair, and she felt so happy she could die.

They did not have sex right away. Mikan was a complete beginner at dating and anything related to it. He waited eight long months before she suggested a weekend trip to the hot springs and shared with him the most beautiful night of his life. And he was glad they waited so long. He was glad, because a few years later she gave him a beautiful daughter and later on another one. They did not marry each other – they felt comfortable the way they were, but they did spend the rest of their lives together.