Hello again! Here you go, please review if you enjoyed it, and review if you didn't! I would like more constructive criticism. I feel that my writing has gotten a little rusty, and if there's anything you can suggest, I'd gladly hear it. Thanks!

PS- I was listening to "Breath of Life" and "Blinding" by Florence + the Machine, and "Boats and Birds" by Gregory and the Hawk when I was writing this, so if you want to have some background music, listen to them and see if it enhances the experience :P

Chapter 22
Home Again

Blue never came back.

Katara stalled for another day, watching as Lani searched the woods for a sign of him, as she asked whether or not he could've been hurt or lost. She couldn't bring herself to tell the girl to stop, and finally Lani sat and stared into the fire, holding her new slingshot in her clenched fist. Darkness fell, and her limbs ached with restlessness. She hadn't dared to leave the campsite all day, making excuses to send Lani for firewood or water, so by the time the setting sun was shining through the wispy clouds above the horizon, turning them gold and pink and orange, she was jumpy and unnerved.

"Do you want to practice bending?" she asked Lani, and the girl shook her head, gazing into the flames. Katara hesitated, then crouched next to her. "Honey, are you okay?" she asked, and to her surprise, two fat tears rolled off Lani's cheeks and hit the ground.

"Why did you make him leave?" she choked out, and Katara's mouth fell open. Lani turned to her, childish rage filling her features. "He saved us and- and he was nice to us, and now he's gone. What did you do to make him leave?" she demanded. I trusted him, Katara wanted to blurt out, but she bit it back, trying to see it from Lani's point of view.

"I didn't do anything," she answered lamely, and both girls heard the lie in her voice. Katara hastened to explain. "He had to figure some things out, and we… we had a discussion, sort of, that made him upset and he left. But we were talking, as adults, Lani- not fighting, it's no one's fault." Lani glowered up at her, still crying silently, and frustration had her running her hands through her hair, yanking at it. "You're too young to understand."

"No I'm not! I know you made him leave, because he wasn't mad at me at all, and then he left with you and never came back! He left because you made him mad. Now he's not going to want to- come see me a-anymore," she sobbed, then pushed away from Katara's reaching arms and went into the shelter, not looking back. Katara felt angry, and hurt, and ashamed. She hadn't meant for her bad decisions to affect Lani- she never wanted her to be upset over things she couldn't control. She knew how that felt, because she lived every hellish day of it. It was a thankless journey, and all of a suddenly, her own path seemed endlessly tiring, completely futile.

Her emotions peaked, and Katara felt a familiar power surge through her body as the sun slipped down over the horizon line. It was night, early, but still dark enough to make out the graceful curves and points of the crescent moon. Katara checked to be sure Lani was lying down, trying not to notice the shaking, breathless sobs she was emitting, and then left for the river. She avoided the pool of water where she'd healed Blue, and instead focused on a line of younger saplings on the other bank of the stream.

Then, she crouched and raised her arms parallel to the ground, before pushing her body back upright and hauling two swirling, iridescent pools of water up with her. She gazed at them for a moment, shimmering before her like friendly spirits to do her bidding, then began twisting them around her body, wrapping them around each other, connecting them into an endless circle of woven water. Lani's face filled her mind, and she lost concentration and momentum. It wasn't fair to be blamed for making him leave, but at the same time, she knew it was partly her fault. She focused again on the trees, felt the destruction inside her and needed it out.

She slammed her palms forward, and two jets of water broke off and whirled into two trees, blasting the trunks to bits. There was a deafening crash, then silence broken only by splinters falling into the water. Katara caught her breath, gazing at the chaos, feeling the rage thrumming inside, then bent her torso backwards, whirling her arms around again and again, building it back up, pulling more water. She took out two more trees, slashing them to bits, upending more with huge water whips, crashing them together as she yelled from exertion. Her body twisted, her hands contorted into claws and needles thudded one after the other into the oak tree across from her. She blasted it again and again, hearing the old wood creak, hearing the spirits of the forest rise up in discomfort. The wind wrapped around her, but she broke free, stepping forward into the water, surging up in a wave that overtook the bank, slamming into the tree and with one last blow.

The world was split by a crack, and the noise sent her into retreat, back onto the ground as it trembled beneath her. She couldn't tear her eyes from the sight of that battered old oak as it creaked and swayed too far, falling now, faster, faster-

The tree hit the ground with a crash, and Katara fell to her knees, staring at the fallen masterpiece. The roots were upended and naked, the cold night air whistling harshly through them. The trunk was bleeding sap, glistening from the ice and water she'd rained down upon it, and old scars were thrown into relief by the moonlight. Already, shredded leaves whipped past her on the breeze, scratching against her face and arms, leaving a cool, tingling sensation behind that felt like tears on her skin. The twisted, gnarled form fell silent, the wood no longer crying out, the branches dead.

Dead. Katara felt a cry wring itself from her throat, and clamped a hand down on her chest as it swelled with agony. Why? Why didn't she stop, or heal, or help? She destroyed something so ancient that it had seen a thousand years, lived through a hundred lives of people who would never know as much as it did. "Oh, no," she gasped out, "no, no, no. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

She said it so many times that the words blended together, that they lost all meaning and sounded empty and hollow. She apologized to the trees, to the water for making it unclean, to herself for being vindictive. She wanted Blue to hear it, knew he probably could because he knew her just that well, but found no solace. He didn't apologize, he ran away. But she'd pushed him there, and she knew it.

"Mama?"

Katara closed her eyes, suddenly remembering a dream she'd had of a golden-eyed girl, the need to protect her, and the sacrifice her father had made for her. But though the girl in that dream had been everything she'd wanted at one point, the girl behind her, the real one with the infectious laugh and shining smile, was waiting for her.

"I'm sorry, Lani," she crooned, and with a little cry, the child launched herself into her arms and held fast. Katara turned her body so that they weren't facing the fallen oak, but Lani craned her neck to see it anyways.

"I heard the noise and I thought something bad was happening. I got scared. Mama, I'm sorry. It's not your fault Blue left, it's mine," she said desperately, "you can be mad at me all you want and I won't mind, but please, please don't leave!" she begged, and Katara crushed her close. She knew what it was like to be so desperate for acceptance that it came at any cost, but a child shouldn't burden herself with guilt.

"I will never, ever leave you. Don't ever think that, baby girl, it wasn't your fault- it wasn't," she said firmly, and Lani just pressed her face into Katara's neck. Even though her arms ached from bending, she rose to kneeling and then to her feet with Lani cradled across her chest.

She walked back to the campsite, laid down and held Lani until they both fell asleep. The next morning, without talking much, Katara and her child packed up the campsite, discarded what they couldn't carry, and left. The journey back to Caldera took two weeks, multiple ferries and boat rides, carriages, carts, anything to save Lani's poor legs. She chose the longer way up from the bay, around the backside of the dormant volcano and up through the craggy hills, because the gates of Caldera were guarded heavily and she knew she should be sneaky.

In all the time it took, she kept an eye out for signs of being followed, or watched- glimpses of eyes in the bushes, shadowy figures beyond her vision, foot prints around their campsites. She looked in vain, and while she felt mostly relief that they were safe for the time being, she knew that a part of her was searching for a wicked blue leer that would have made her feel even more secure. Lani didn't mention Blue the entire time, and Katara took her cue and stayed quiet. It gave her time to remember all the pieces of puzzle she had so far, and to figure out her next step.

Lord Tenji hired those men, and she needed to learn more about him before she challenged him. She needed to know why he had any interest in her or her daughter, and how to make sure that interest ended immediately. It was likely that her apartment was no longer safe, and she had no money for a new one. She'd already been pinching food from fruit stands and roasting birds that Lani took down, because she'd used the last of her silver pieces for carriage fare.

Once she'd dealt with Tenji, she had to find a way back to Azula. Ursa said she and Zuko had snuck into the palace by an underground tunnel, and that the last time she'd seen him, he was upset, but still alive. Where had he gone inside the palace, and why had he been angry? There was only one person who would know what happened after he left the room, and that was who came in next to replace him. But she couldn't very well ask Azula, could she?

By the time they were walking down their street, Katara carefully hooded and Lani with her hair braided back and a cloak over her small body, she'd decided to go into the Upper Ring and track down Lord Tenji after she checked out her old apartment. Lani could stay hidden in the back room of the tea shop without anyone ever noticing, she'd told Katara herself about taking naps in the store room when business had been slow. If the tea shop wasn't open, she would take Lani to the healer Aang had been with. That would also give her a chance to ask the healer where he'd gone.

"Mama," Lani whispered, breaking through her thoughts. She pointed surreptitiously to the courtyard of the tea shop, where two soldiers were just stepping down to the bottom of the staircase, and Katara grabbed her hand, lowering it before they noticed she was pointing.

"Just keep walking, honey." Katara put a hand on Lani's shoulder and kept their pace steady, even as the soldiers turned to watch them, even after she turned down a side street onto the next avenue. When she finally felt secure, the waterbender leaned against a wall and sighed. The courtyard had been cleaned, all evidence of Aang's fight removed. There was a fresh, but haphazardly done coat of paint on the walls, and boards were nailed over her windows, though her door was unblocked. "Looks like we can't go home just yet. Do you want to come with me to visit a friend?"

Lani smiled, a dimple appearing in her cheek. "Do I have a choice, or is that one of the questions I'm not really supposed to answer?" Katara laughed and hugged her, then led her out of the shadows and to the healer's house. The old woman came to the door when she knocked, but only glared at her through the crack in the door.

"Your friend isn't here anymore, and you being here will bring me trouble. I'm sorry, but I can't help you." Katara reached out, her mouth falling open in shock.

"I thought you wanted to help us and the Avatar," she accused, and the lady snorted.

"I did before another girl showed up and got him, and then soldiers came to my door and demanded both of them. They tore the entire room apart, trashed my home- no, my little chickie, you'll find no more help here." And with that, she shut the door in Katara's face.

Her mind whirled as she took Lani again by the hand and started out of the area. Aang had been picked up by a girl? Was it Toph, maybe, or someone from the temple? Either way, she had to think about it later. Lani needed a place to stay safely, somewhere that no one would look for her. Somewhere quiet, where she could sit for hours at a time without being conspicuous.

The answer didn't come until they were already halfway to the Upper Ring, but it was so simple that it made Katara laugh, drawing Lani up short in the middle of the street. A few passing people gave her dirty looks for stopping so suddenly, but by the time one man angrily told her to get moving, she was already pulling Lani in the opposite direction, the way they'd come from.

"Where are we going?" she asked, and Katara smiled down at her, telling her to wait a moment. When they came to a stop outside the library, her nose wrinkled in distaste and she let go of Katara's hand. "It looks dark in there. And smelly."

"You can't judge a book by its cover, Lani. Or its smell. And you'll see plenty of books in there, I promise you. I have to run some errands, but you can't come with me. It's too dangerous. Can you stay here until I come for you?" Lani shrugged, biting her lip. Katara took that as consent, and gently led the child into the musty old building. She went up to the empty front desk and waited for a moment, looking around for the librarian. The old, smooth wood felt nice under her palms, and the scent of paper and ink comforted her, reminding her, strangely enough, of Iroh and his letters. She missed him, and she knew she could use his advice.

"Whadduya want?" Katara jumped and cursed loudly as the old hag popped up right in front of her, smiling with all her missing teeth. She cackled and coughed wetly, then came out from behind the counter and sized her up. "Jumpy thing, aren't you? Anyways, I figured you'd be back. Thirsty for knowledge, eh?"

"Looking for help, actually," Katara said warily, but the woman just nodded sagely and folded her arms across her chest, waiting. "Lani," Katara called, and the little girl emerged from behind a bookshelf with a scroll in her hands, her eyes shining. The woman's eyebrows raised, and Katara pleaded quietly, "I have to take care of some things that she can't be there for.

"Mama, look at this one! I've never seen anything like it! What is it?" She showed Katara the picture on the scroll, and Katara smiled at the depiction of a magnificent lion turtle with a whole forest on its back.

"'What is it?' What a question! Come, girl, I'll teach you all about them, and anything else you want to know." The librarian glanced at Katara, then put her twisted old hand on Lani's shoulder. It was like she could read Katara's mind, which was both unsettling and a profound relief.

"I have to go, but I'll be back for her. Thank you- she won't be any trouble, Lani's a good girl and I promise, I'll come back and pick her up. I promise," she said again, though this time to Lani. The girl gazed at her very solemnly, then nodded and rolled up the scroll, her cheeks reddening. Katara bent down and kissed her goodbye, wiping a tear from her cheek. She knew this wasn't good for her, being left alone all the time when she'd already been abandoned so many times. But this was better than the alternative.

"Thank you again," she said, and the hag pinched her cheek, hard. Like she was a toddler.

"Go take care of whatever business you have. I can tell it's important, and it seems like you've got a life to get back to once it's finished. I'll look after the little one." Katara nodded and left, knowing she didn't need to worry about her daughter when she was under the protection of that old dragon. The sun was at the highest point in the sky, and she started to sweat as she hurried back to her apartment. She needed to know where Aang was, who he was with, and if he'd gotten a letter to Sokka before he disappeared. Since her apartment was the only other place they'd been together, she knew if he'd left something for her, it would be there. If Lord Tenji was as important as he sounded, she might need his political standing to attain an audience with him. It was the best plan she could think of- gather information, infiltrate, execute.

The guards were gone from the courtyard when she got there, but still, Katara hung around the block for a while, watching closely. Sure enough, about ten minutes after she arrived, two official looking men turned into the tea shop's yard and went up the stairs to her home. She shrank back into the shadows, then caught a glimpse of the insignia on their sleeves and relaxed. They were just the Post Carriers, both fitted out with cropped pants, long boots and armbands emblazoned with a scroll tied in black ribbon. One drew a scroll from his bag and looked at it quizzically, and the other asked him something. He gestured to the boarded up windows, but after a long moment, the first man shrugged and gingerly set the scroll in front of the door.

By the time they were around the corner, she was already up the stairs, frantically breaking the seal on the parchment and unrolling it, expecting to see hurried directions towards a meeting spot, or plans to reconnect later. She didn't, however, expect a long, flowing script and embossed cherry blossoms.

"The Esteemed Lord Tenji of Matiko cordially invites Lady Katara of the Southern Water Tribe to dine and dance… at his personal retreat, the House of the Golden Lotus?" She read the words three times before the meaning finally sunk in, and when it did, she sat down, hard. The sun beat down on her head, making her thought process slower than usual.

In the South Pole, if two people had a quarrel, they stated their terms, agreed on a compromise, and went on with their lives, or they fought for their terms one on one. Here, in the land of gilded knives and pretty poison, the aristocrats drank tea with their enemies and hid threats in bouquets. She would never understand it, she decided, and frankly, she was relieved things were still so simple back home.

Gather information, infiltrate, execute? Or glide in as one of them, invited and accounted for, and play it by ear? She shook her head, still bewildered by the fact that that was even an option. She thought back to when she and Toph had dressed up and snuck into that party in Ba Sing Se, and felt ridiculous even considering it. She was hardly more than a peasant, and the aristocrats would be able to tell within seconds. It was ludicrous. It was stupid. It was the best choice, and she didn't want to choose it. Surely it was a trap, but maybe if she was careful, she could avoid springing it?

Even so, Katara rolled the scroll up and quickly descended the staircase. She looked over her shoulder as she stalked down the road, knowing she'd probably stayed at the entrance to her apartment too long and that she couldn't waste any more time there. Now that she was invited into Tenji's home, Aang would have to wait. The date on the invitation was that same night, and the party was supposed to start at eight. She had about six hours to figure out how to make herself presentable, and how to get Tenji on his own to confront him.

But first, she needed to make sure Lani would be taken care of. She sighed and wiped the sweat from her brow, then began the trek back to the library. Her legs ached, but she was strong. She made good time, only stopping once to get a sip of water from a public fountain and snatch an apple from a passing cart. It surprised her that she still felt guilty about stealing, after everything else she'd done, but it was a relief to know that she wasn't numb to crime.

She'd finished half the apple by the time she walked into the library, and she caught a glimpse of Lani through the bookshelves. She was sitting with the librarian, looking down at a bright illustration she could only see the edge of. Lani's eyes were big, and the old woman was watching her with approval. "She brought him back from the edge of death, she did. She was known for her healing, and everywhere she went, people remembered her. Your mother's a beauty, which I'm sure, helped with the remembering." Katara gasped and crouched down between more bookshelves, pushing aside dusty scrolls to see the picture.

It was a drawing of the old gang. Aang smiled up from the page, brilliantly colored, though the grey of his eyes was a little too dark. Toph stood facing half away, her own blank eyes brooding, her arms folded across her chest. Stone walls jutted above her in the background. Sokka (who the artist had apparently decided wasn't rugged or muscular enough in real life) had his arm around Suki, whose face was turned up into one of her famous smiles, and Katara found herself wondering what she looked like now, as a mother.

In the foreground of the picture, Katara's arms were raised and water floated above her head, her face calm, serene. Next to her stood Zuko, a flame cupped in his hand, looking at the rest of the gang as if he'd never see them again after that day. Even on paper, the rendering of his face ripped open her old wound, and she bit her lip. He had betrayed her, hated her, imprisoned her and mocked her, but he had never lied to her. Not like Blue did. How could love mean so many different things?

"Who are all these people with Mama? That's Aang, and that's Toph- except she's old now, and taller- but everyone else…" Lani said, her voice quieting.

"That's our Fire Lord Zuko, and it's a shame he died because you wouldn't have found a more intelligent, willing man in the whole country. He wanted to fix things, see- knew the nations had to unite to survive. It's said that he was going to lead us into a new era of peace and prosperity, but he never got the chance. The other man is Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, your uncle of course, and his wife Suki. Have you never met them before, child, your own family?"

Katara stepped out from behind the shelf. "I'm back," she announced, and Lani jumped a foot in the air before slamming shut the bound illustration book and running to her. Katara swung her up into her arms and handed her the apple to finish as the librarian came around the corner, her eyebrow raised.

"Already? I thought you'd be gone for hours."

"Well, actually," she started, "that's what I came to talk about. I was originally going to visit a friend, but when I- well, basically, he invited me to a ball he's having tonight, and we need to have a very important… discussion. Lani can't come, and if I need to find her another place to stay tonight, I need to do it now so I have time to get ready." The woman started laughing dryly and waved the suggestion off, then glanced at her and started cackling harder. She felt a twinge of annoyance, and frowned.

"What's so funny?" she demanded, and the old bat pinched her cheek like she was a toddler.

"That a fearsome warrior like Katara of the Water Tribe- yes, I've known who you were since you first came here- who's apparently been roughing it since the end of the war, is going to a ball in muddy, sweat-stained robes and walking boots. Who's throwing the party, a hobo?" She coughed out a chuckle at her own joke.

"Lord Tenji, actually," Katara snapped, angry that it was so obvious she hadn't taken better care of herself. She knew her nails were uneven and dirty, that her hair was ragged at the ends and too long to style in anything other than a braid, but the part of her that was still all woman cried for the days where she regularly washed under her armpits. She watched as the librarian stopped laughing, her eyes widening, then she bit back a smile when the woman sniffed haughtily and turned away.

"Lord Tenji, eh? A close friend of yours, you say?" Katara felt her face freeze, and hoped it was in some semblance of a grin. It wouldn't do to leave the impression that she was going to do something unsavory, just in case the old bat happened to know him.

"In a way. See, I've never met him, but we've had some correspondence in the past, and he's invited me to a ball tonight to bring all that to a head. This is my last chance to make my feelings known, and it's the most important thing in my life, so I'll go naked if I have to." The hag looked her over with a critical eye, then shook her head with a sigh.

"Tenji is a very important bastard with very powerful backings. A marionette set on silver-leafed string. No doubt he'd enjoy seeing you naked, the old leech, but you'd be better served by taking yourself down to Ishiki Street and finding the salon, then the dress shop. Lord Tenji likes pretty things, and he's an aristocrat so you can be sure he'll act good in front of his guests, and do his dirty work in the back rooms."

"I don't have any money." Katara's admission was waved away, and she was led into the back room behind the counter. Lani tagged along, throwing the apple core in a bin and wiping her sticky fingers on her shirt before catching Katara's eye and smiling guiltily. "What are we doing back here?" she asked, and the librarian stepped back from a chest to shove a handful of gold coins into Katara's hands.

"The great thing about running a library here is that all the rich, aristocrats want to donate to charities to impress their society friends, yet none of them care if you actually buy new scrolls and whatnot. I treat myself to pickled plums on rice every day and not one person gives a rodent's- well, they don't mind, anyhow."

Katara knew it would be polite to decline, to refuse the money and earn it somehow on her own… but she had not the time or the will to pass up free money. She instead nodded and said, "I'll donate twice this amount when I can, and I won't forget." The librarian grinned widely.

"I expect you will. Now go to Ishiki and tell them Takaguratawaniashita sent you." Katara's mouth dropped open, but she closed it hastily and bowed in thanks, frantically mouthing the syllables. When she straightened back up, Lani hugged her and put her hand on Katara's cheek, staring up at her with her big innocent eyes.

"Have fun at the party. I want to see you when you're all dressed up someday. And… and can I meet my uncle soon? It's okay if you don't want me to, but- well, he and Aunt Suki look like they might like me, if you tell them I'm your daughter." Katara nodded tightly, tears pricking at the backs of her eyes.

"They would love you just as I did, even when you were alone as an orphan. If I hadn't gotten to you first, you might have even been calling Suki 'mother' by now," she said gaily, knowing that it wasn't certain Lani would ever get the chance to meet Sokka but suddenly wishing for nothing more than her family and old friends back together. Katara thanked the librarian again, having already forgotten the last part of her name, then kissed her daughter and left the library, gold in her pocket and the future in mind.

If only she could remember that damned woman's name.

Pretty long chapter, no? Sorry- I had a lot of ground to cover, and didn't really know a good place to stop. Review!

-Aleina