Chapter twenty-two
The screaming was cut off abruptly, leaving an almost palpable silence in its wake. Dani didn't think, she just acted. Wrapping one of the sheets around herself, she got up and hurried to the bedroom door. Opening it she called out Nico's name, only to have more silence greeting her. Was he hurt?
Just when she was about to call out to him again, the silence was broken.
"In here!" Nico's voice came from behind a closed door directly across from where Dani stood in the hallway. He sounded slightly hoarse, but not alarmed in any way.
She found him sitting on the side of the bed in a guestroom that was slightly smaller than the master bedroom, but just as elegantly decorated. He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, staring down at the floor. "Hey – you okay?"
"Sure. Just a bad dream. Sorry I woke you." He got up and came over to pull her in for a quick kiss.
"I was already awake. Wondering where you were, actually." Dani glanced at the rumpled bed behind him. "So – did my loud snoring drive you away or was it something else?" She cringed internally as her attempt at a light-hearted approach fell flat. They both knew very well why he had opted to sleep here alone instead of in his own bed with her.
Nico averted his eyes. "I didn't want to… disturb you," he said, pulling a hand through his hair.
She waited for him to look back at her before she replied. "Nico – I understand that you are worried about what could happen to me when you have a nightmare. But I really don't think that us sleeping in separate rooms is the answer. You can't let this fear rule your life – our lives – forever."
He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I don't intend to. In fact…" He lowered his hand and took in a deep breath, as if bracing himself. "I'm hoping you can give me a name."
Dani's brow furrowed. "A name?"
"Yeah." He glanced down. "You see, I need a good therapist. To help me deal with… things. Thought you might know one." His gaze met hers again.
She knew he meant to sound casual, but the vulnerability in his eyes spoke volumes about how hard this was for him. It also made her breath catch, causing her to sigh quietly before she was able to respond. "I think I know several that can help you, actually." Dani waited only for a heartbeat before deciding to give him the other option too. "I also know a couple of psychiatrists that could prescribe medication to help with the nightmares, if that's something you wanna try…"
Nico began shaking his head before she even finished talking. "No. No drugs."
She frowned at his forceful tone. "Okay – wanna tell me why not?"
He sighed. "Drugs aren't my thing. Can you accept that as an answer?"
Dani nodded slowly, knowing that there was more to it than that, but reluctant to push him on the subject. "Sure. A therapist it is, then. I'll get you the contact info as soon as we get home."
Relief flashed in his eyes. "Thanks," he said.
"No problem. You know – I'm actually a little surprised that you never tried therapy before. With a trauma like yours, it's…"
A smirk pulled up one corner of his mouth. "Who said I never did?"
"So you have? When? Where?"
"Pittsburgh. After I returned from Iraq." He shrugged. "Turned out to be a waste of time, so I quit going after a couple of sessions."
"Why? What happened?"
"Anyone ever tell you that you ask too many questions?" Rolling his eyes, he pulled her into him. "I didn't have the right motivation back then." He leaned in for a kiss, but she pulled back a little.
"And you do now?" She asked, a teasing smile coming on her face.
"Yes." His hands came up to tug at the sheet she had wrapped around herself, making it slide to the floor. The cool morning air gave her slight goosebumps but she didn't care, because the way Nico looked at her made her feel hot all over. When he spoke again, his tone was serious. "I'm dating the most wonderful woman in the world now – and I promised her no more running." He took her in his arms and all coherent thought fled Dani's mind for a while as he showed her exactly how motivated he was.
Unlike a lot of places in Sonoma County, the area surrounding Nico's vineyard was still relatively quiet and tourist-free. Other than hiking enthusiasts and nature lovers, no one ever set foot on the winding trail that led past his house and up into the hills. And even they had seemed to take this lovely summer morning off. The only living creatures accompanying Nico and Dani on their walk along the trail were the birds singing in the tree tops. Nico suspected this peacefulness had something to do with the fact that he'd never taken the trouble of listing the vineyard in all the tourist guides. He didn't offer any wine tastings either – well, other than the private one he had hosted last night, that was…
His memories of the previous night inevitably made his his mind wander back to waking up alone, screaming at the top of his lungs. He found himself still amazed by the way Dani had handled that. He'd seen the hurt flash in her eyes when she realized that he'd slept in the guestroom, but only briefly. Her understanding and compassion had given him the last push towards making the decision he'd been thinking about ever since she'd left his apartment on Thursday. Therapy – who could have guessed he would ever get to that point again? A wry smile tugged at his mouth. Sure as hell not Maxwell… That old douchebag would probably have his second heart attack if he knew that his oldest stepson was planning on going back to therapy – and out of his own free will this time.
Nico shook his head. Thinking about that would only ruin the good mood he was in, he decided as they came out from under the trees and were treated to a panoramic view of rolling hills covered in rows and rows of vines interspersed with patches of trees much like the one they had just walked through. The sky had taken on the color of faded jeans and formed a beautiful contrast with the lush green of the leaves. A few lonely cotton candy clouds sailed lazily in the direction of the ocean. The whole scene looked like a picture postcard. But Nico spared it only a brief glance, taken as he was by Dani's serene expression while she took it all in, a vague smile on her face and seemingly unaware of his eyes on her. So he took the opportunity to look his fill – although he doubted that he could ever get enough of staring at her, since he'd been doing that for about three years now and he still felt like he had only just begun.
Her eyebrow arched up slightly and her smile widened as she gave him a sideways glance. "Like what you're seeing, Dominic?"
"No," he said with a smile of his own when her eyebrow went all the way up. "I love what I'm seeing – Doctor." He stopped walking, turned her towards him and was just about to kiss her when her phone went off in her purse.
"Hold that thought," she said while reaching for the device. "Abby? What can I do for you?"
In the next few minutes, Nico zoned out again as he mentally debated with himself on the pros and cons of banning their cell phones from their next getaway – and maybe their clothes too, while he was at it. The pros easily outweighed the cons in his opinion… He pulled his mind out of the gutter when he saw Dani put the phone away.
"That was Abby Bruce," she said with a frown. "Inviting us both to have dinner with her and Jenny tomorrow night. She already booked a table at some place called The NoMad." She sighed as if she wasn't looking forward to it.
"You don't want to go?" Nico asked. He took her hand and they started walking again, soon coming up on the next patch of trees.
"Oh, sure I do. But she also said something about toasting to our new working relationship – and I'm not so sure how I feel about that anymore."
"How come?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. It's the perfect opportunity for me. I can make a fresh start while still working with people I care about – Paloma, TK… Plus I liked the diversity in clients that V3 offered me, and SBG has that too. Guess I'm just having trouble switching back into work mode or something. You know, after all the R and R I've been taking lately."
Nico squeezed her hand. "You could always turn down the job. You haven't signed anything yet, have you?"
"No, we never got around to that – but I do need a job soon. That house I live in? Doesn't pay for itself, you know. And now there's also Lindsay's hospital bill to consider, not to mention the stack of other bills that have been piling up on my desk lately…" She sighed and waved her free hand in a dismissive gesture. "Anyway, let's not spoil the rest of our time here with any of that stuff." A smile came on her face, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.
They walked in silence for a few minutes while an idea started forming in Nico's head. The more he thought about it, the more perfect it seemed. "If you want, I could…"
"No. Absolutely not." Dani stopped walking, pulling her hand out of his so she could cross her arms. Her eyes glared daggers at him and he frowned in response, not really sure what had gotten into her. "You may be filthy rich, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna let you pay my bills for me." Her hands went to her hips and she gave him a defiant look, her chin raised and her mouth set in a stubborn line.
"So you just want me for my body and not for my cash?" Nico quipped. When she just kept on staring at him, he sighed. "Dani, come on. First of all, I may be rich, but most of the money is tied up in this place, the penthouse and the company. Second, I wouldn't dare to insult you by offering to pay your bills."
She eyed him suspiciously, but he saw her relax slightly. "You sure about that?"
"Positive. I've seen you in full Santino mode, remember? I value most of my bodyparts too much to have that happen to me." He took her hands, lifting them away from her hips and up to his mouth to kiss her knuckles. Then he put them on his shoulders and let his own arms slide around her waist. "Now, as I was saying, if you want I could reach out to a few of my clients. See if any of them are in need of an inhouse therapist." He didn't tell her that he had one particular client in mind.
Dani blew out a breath and glanced down for a moment. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to have more than just one option…" she said, looking back up at him. "Thank you, Nico. Sorry for lashing out like that."
"Okay. I'll make some calls first thing Monday morning. Think you can hold Abby off till then?"
"I'll just have to be honest and tell her that I'm looking into other job offers too. Who knows, maybe she'll offer me even better terms than she already has," Dani said with a slight smirk before her face went serious again. "And just so you know – I value your… bodyparts too." She pulled his face down to hers. "But I love you for who you are," she whispered right before she kissed him, pressing her own bodyparts firmly against his and making him wish they hadn't gone for a walk.
Do you want reality, or do you want to stay in the dream? As Sonoma County fell away beneath the plane, Dani recalled the question Nico had asked her after their very first night together. Reality had blown up in their faces shortly after that and in the weeks that followed she had often wished that she had opted for the dream instead. Like she'd ever really had a choice.
Reality had a way of invading the dream, as Nico's nightmare and Abby's phonecall had once again proven today. And they had no control over when or how that happened. But it didn't really matter either, because dream and reality were like light and darkness, joy and sadness, sunshine and rain. One simply could not be fully appreciated without also experiencing the other. Chances were that their lives would explode into the usual chaos again as soon as their feet touched the tarmac a couple of hours from now.
This time, however, Dani felt no regret about their return to reality. She had come to understand that reality didn't put an end to the dream. The opposite was true in fact. Smiling, she leaned her head on Nico's shoulder and closed her eyes when his arm came around her. This time it felt more like they were finally on their way to truly living the dream.
A/N: As you may have guessed from that last bit – this concludes the actual story. I will publish one more chapter however, an epilogue. That will probably be up sometime in the next week. In the meantime, thank you all so much for giving me the courage and confidence to see this through, and please tell me what you think of this chapter.