Kuch time baad Daya hall me aata hai dekhta hai niyati kitchen me hai.
DAYA-aap yaha kya kar rahi hai?
NIYATI-wo main breakfast bana rahi thi. Kya banau kya khaoge?
DAYA-aap kyu kar rahi hai main bana lunga na.
NIYATI-tumhe takleef hogi na jaao ja ke aaram se baitho. Main nashta bana ke lati hu.
DAYA-per aap..
NIYATI—off ho tum 2 din se bana rahe ho na aaj main bana deti hu. Batao na kya khaoge?
DAYA-lekin.
NIYATI-ab chup.
Niyati apne haath me pakda chaku dikha ke daya ko daatna shuru kar deti hai.
NIYATI-kitna bolate ho tum. Her time main kar dunga… main ye.. main wo…. her baat me behas. Kabhi chup ho ke dusaro ki baat sunte bhi ki nahi. Janti hu ki bahut uchi naak hai tumhari lekin ek din mere haath ka bana nasta kha loge to tumhari ye naak choti nahi ho jayegi. Ab chup chap se ja ke waha baitho or main nasta bana ke la rahi hu chup kar ke kha lena.
Daya hairani se niyati ki baatein sun raha hota hai.
NIYATI-ab tak yahi khade ho jaao ja ke baitho waha.
DAYA-(making puppy face) ja raha hu aise daat kyu rahi hai?
NIYATI-wah tumhari bhalai ke liye kuch kahu to tumhe daatna lagta hai. Bolo galat kya kaha maine?
DAYA-galat nahi kaha per mujhe aadat nahi hai. Koi mujhe aise nahi daatata.
NIYATI-oh to ye problem hai. Agar aadat nahi hai to aadat daal lo future me kaam aayega.
DAYA-matlab?
NIYATI-tum fredi se puchna ki shadi ke baad biwi ki kitni daat padti hai. Aadat rahegi to aasan hogi tumhari married life.
DAYA- main fredi nahi hu. Or zaroori to nahi ki her biwi pati ko daatne wali ho.
NIYATI-nahi hoti tab bhi ban jati hai. Ye pati naam ka jo prani hota hai na ye bina daat khaye koi kaam sahi sahi nahi karta.
DAYA-matlab aap bhi apne pati ko daategi?
NIYATI-may be. lekin Tum abhi tak yaha kya kar rahe ho jaao ja ke baitho.
Daya ja ke sofe pe baith jata hai. Niyati kuch der baad toast nd omlet le ke aati hai. Dono sath me breakfast karte hai.
DAYA- maine pata kiya hai aaj shaam tak baarish ruk jayegi. Kal raaste se sara pani nikal liya jayega tab aap apne ghar ja sakti hai.
Niyati ka dil ye sun ke udas ho jata hai.
NIYATI-tum to bahut khush hoge ki finaly kal ye musibat tumhare ghar se ja rahi hai.
DAYA-nahi aisi koi baat nahi hai.
NIYATI-to tum kehna chah rahe ho ki tum mere jane se bura feel karoge?
DAYA-maine aisa to nahi kaha.
NIYATI-to sidhe sidhe kaho na ki mere jane se tumhe bahut khushi hogi.
DAYA-aap sidhe sidhe bol dijiye ki aap mere muh se bulwana kya chahti hai.
NIYATI-k..k. Kuch bhi to nahi. Main tumse kyu kuch bulwana chahungi.
DAYA-to phir. Khair jane dijiye mera to ho gaya ab main ja ke naha leta hu.
NIYATI-thik hai. Per dhyan rakhna bandage geela na ho jaye. Dard hoga.
DAYA-ji thik hai.
Daya bathroom me nahane jata hai.
DAYA-ye kya ho gaya hai. Kaha to kal tak main ye soch raha tha ki ye musibat mere ghar se jaye to main bhagda karunga lekin aaj main utna khush kyu nahi hu. Mujhe to khush hona chahiye ki ye musibat, nahi nahi musibat nahi itni bhi buri nahi hai wo. Jo bhi hai ye kal jane wali hai phir bhi main khush kyu nahi hu. Daya tere sath kuch gadbad ho rahi hai. Ye ladki jitni jaldi yaha se jayegi utna accha hoga tere liye.
Daya nahaa ke bahar aata hai to dekhta hai ki niyati kisi se phone pe baat karne me lagi hai.
NIYATI-are nahi yaar kaisi baat kar rahe ho. Main tumhe kaise bhool sakti hu. Main to tumhe pal pal miss karti hu. abhi… haa hu ek khadus ke ghar pe. Haa yaar pakau hai. Smile karne me bhi itni kanjusi karta hai ki pucho mat. Naa…. koi chance hi nahi. Haa haa haa….
DAYA-ye itna hus hus ke kisase baat kar rahi hai? Or meri burai bhi kar rahi hai.
NIYATI-haa ok chal bye. I love u.
DAYA-I LOVE U!
Daya apne room me change karne jata hai.
DAYA-Ye kaun sa specail banda hai jise i love u bol rahi hai? Daya daya daya tujhe kya? Wo jise i love u bole. Tu apna kaam se kaam rakh na.
Tabhi Niyati achanak se kamre me aa jati hai. Or daya ko aise change karte dekh ke uski chikh nikal jati hai.
NIYATI-aaa.
Daya Niyati ko achanak dekh kar hadbada jata hai or dusri taraf ghum ke jaldi se kapde pehanane ki kosis karta hai.
DAYA-aap ….aap yaha kya kar rahi hai?
NIYATI-main to yaha apna phone charge me lagane aai thi per tum..tum yaha kya kar rahe ho?
DAYA-dikhai nahi deta kya kapde pehan raha hu.
NIYATI-tumne mujhe samjh kya rakha hai. Main kya aise waise scene dekhti rehti hu.
DAYA-kum se kum aane se pehle aawaz to laga sakti thi.
NIYATI-mujhe kya pata tha ki tum yaha hoge mujhe to laga tum bathroom me hoge.
DAYA—bathroom se to bahut pehle bahar aa gaya main. Aap apne phone me itni buzy thi ki aapko pata hi nahi chala.
NIYATI- to kyat um bathroom se aise hi nikal aate ho. Are kapde pehan ke nahi nikal sakte the.
DAYA- wahi per change karne ki kosis ki per bandage geela ho gaya or bina bandage bandhe kapde nahi pehan sakta tha.
NIYATI-kaha tha na ki bandage geela mat hone dena. Tum koi kaam sambhal ke nahi kar sakte kya? Dikhao mujhe zakhm bigad to nahi liya.
Niyati is about to turn but daya stop him.
DAYA-nahi bilkul nahi. Aap idhar mat dekhiye maine abhi shirt nahi pehni hai.
NIYATI-to jaldi pehno na kitni der se shirt hi pehan rahe ho. Or ye darwaza kyu nahi band kiya?
DAYA-aap bhool gayi ho to bata du ki aapki mehrbani se is kamre ka darwaza maine khud toda tha. Or ab ye band nahi ho sakta.
NIYATI-ok sorry. Ho gaya.
DAYA-haa ho gaya. Per aapko itni jaldi kis baat ki hai?
Daya Niyati ke saamne aa jata hai or Niyati use dekh ke smile karne lagti hai.
DAYA-kya hua? Hus kyu rahi hai?
NIYATI-tum office bhi aise jate ho.
DAYA-haa kabhi kabhi. Kyu?
NIYATI-aise hi shirt ke button ulte sidhe laga ke?
DAYA-(little embbaress tone) wo…. wo jaldi jaldi me galti ho gayi. Per isme bhi aapki galti hai. Aap ko hi jaldi thi na.
NIYATI-haa! Tum koi kaam thik se nahi kar sakte or galti meri.
DAYA-aapko to humesha meri hi galti dikhti hai. Her kisi se meri burai karti rehti hai.
NIYATI-main tumhari burai kisi se kyu karugi?
DAYA-jhooth mat boliye maine khud suna hai aapko meri burai karte huye.
NIYATI- kisase ki maine tumhari burai?
DAYA-abhi bahar aap jisase baat kar rahi thi.
NIYATI-tumne chup ke meri baatein suni? Tum me kitni gandi aadate hai na. Chup chup ke ladkiyo ko dance karte dekhna, unki baatein sunana. Or kaha nazar rakhte ho chup chup ke?
DAYA-mujhme aisi koi gandi aadat nahi hai. Or main koi chup ke aapki baatein nahi sun raha tha wo to main baathroom se aaya to sunai de gayi. Waise tha kaun wo jisase aap meri tarifo ke pul baandh rahi thi?
NIYATI-opps sorry. per main tumhari burai nahi kar rahi thi. Wo to mera best friend hai KIKU or main usase apni life ki koi baat nahi chupati.
DAYA-accha. Best friend!
NIYATI-yes bestest friend. Hum delhi me sath sath rehte the.
DAYA-ek ghar me?
NIYATI-stupid sath sath rehna matlab ek ghar me rehna nahi hota. Hum humesha her jagah sath sath ghumte the, her kaam sath sath karte the. Wo mujhse or main usase apni her baat share karte the. Log to kehte the ki kiku or niyati ek dusare ke liye hi bane hai. Uske baad hum saath me hi London me crime depatement me kaam karte the.
DAYA-huh best friend. Best friend to main or ABHIJEET hai. Ek dusre ke liye jaan de sakte hai. Or Kiku ye kaisa naam hai jaise kisi kartoon ka ho. Naam to mera accha hai DAYA . Kitna accha matlab hai mere naam ka. Or Kiku is naam ka bhi koi matlab hua kya?
NIYATI-kya hua? Kya soch rahe ho?
DAYA-kuch nahi. Aap kuch keh rahi thi.
NIYATI-haa main tumhe kiku or mere baare me bata rahi thi. Hum na bahut shararate kiya karte the. School me teachers nd puri building me log humse pareshan rehte the.
DAYA-aaj bhi aadat gayi nahi hai logo ko pareshan karne ki.
NIYATI-off ho tum apne aap se baatein karna band karoge tab to main tumhe aage bataungi na. Aao yaha baitho main tumhe aaram se batati hu apne or kiku ke kisse.
NIYATI, Daya ko kiku ke baare me batana shuru karti hai. Daya boar ho jata hai.
DAYA- he bhagwan kab tak chalega iska ye kiku puran. Itne kisse to Mere or ABHIJEET ke mere paas bhi nahi hai jitna iske paas hai kiku ke. Jane kab tak sunana padega. Kitni excited hai ye kiku ke baare me batate huye jaise samne kiku hi baitha ho. Itna hi pasand hai ye kiku to usi ke paas rehna tha na. Bekar me uske kisse sun ke baki duniya walo ka bheja fry to nahi hota.
Niyati ki baatein khatam nahi hoti dekh Daya irritate ho jata hai.
DAYA-mujhe bhookh lagi hai.
NIYATI-aah main to tumhari baato me bhool hi gayi ki tumhe dawai bhi deni hai.
DAYA-meri baato me ya us kiiiku ki baato me.
NIYATI-ab chalo tumhe khana kha ke dawai bhi leni hai. Baki baatein main baad me bataungi.
DAYA-he bhagwan baad me bhi sunana padega ye kiku puran.
Niyati khane ke table pe daya ko khana serve karti hai. Daya khana dekh ke buri si shakal banata hai.
NIYATI-dekh kya rahe ho khana shuru karu.
DAYA-aapne isase pehle kabhi khana banaya hai?
NIYATI-haa kabhi kabhi. Jab main college me thi tab main kiku her sunday kitchen me apna experiment karte the.
DAYA-(mummering tone) yaha bhi kiku.
NIYATI-kha kyu nahi rahe? Main utna bura khana bhi nahi banati. Tumse accha na sahi per khane layak khana to bana hi leti hu.
DAYA-khane layak wo to dikh raha hai. Daya aaj to koi doctor bhi nahi milega. Khane me Risk hai per na khaya to or jyada risk hai. Ye phir se ladna chalu ho jayegi.
NIYATI-kya hua khao na.
DAYA-khaa raha hu na. Waise is dish ka naam kya hai?
NIYATI-naam. Naam abhi maine kuch socha nahi hai lekin maine na internet se dekh 1st time banai hai na wo bhi apne style me to tum ise Niyati specail Machurian Chowmin with indian masale bula sakte ho.
DAYA-kya yaar ye ajooba try karne ke liye aaj ka hi din mila tha. Jaisi ajoobi ye khud hai waisi hi ajoobi ye dish bhi hai or usase bhi ajooba iska naam hai.
Aap bhi khaiye na.
NIYATI-haa haa khaungi na lekin ye dish maine tumhare liye banai hai na to pehle tum try karo.
DAYA- ji bilkul.
Daya ek spoon dish chakhta hai or ajeeb si shakal banata hai.
DAYA-kitna ganda taste hai iska. Lagta hai apni lab ka koi chemical mila diya hai isme. I m sure zehar bhi isase kahi jyada tasty hoga.
NIYATI-(after eating 1 spoon) Huu yummy.
DAYA-kamal hai ise ye khana yummy lag raha hai. Ya to iska dimag kharab hai ya phir juban.
NIYATI-Niyati tera to jawab nahi. Rukhi sukhi dish me bhi tu aisa taste dalti hai na ki bus khane wale na tere hath chum le.
DAYA-mera to dil kar raha hai ye haath hi kaat dalu jisase itna bekar khana bana hai. Iske would be husband ka na bhagwan hi malik hai. Ye aise aise dish bana ke khilayegi to wo bechara ya to pagalkhane pahuch jayega ya phir Murdaghar.
NIYATI-kya hua? Are khao na thanda ho jayega. Pata hai kiku humesha kehta tha ki main agar koi restorent join kar lu to kuch hi dino me wo restorent famous ho jayega.
DAYA-famous to ho hi jata kyunki aisa ghatiya khana or kahi nahi milta. Or bechara restorent malik sucide kar leta.
NIYATI-kaha kho gaye ho jaldi jaldi khatam karo phir tumhe medicins bhi leni hai.
DAYA-ji kha…. kha raha hu.
NIYATI-pata hai ek sunday ko maine or kiku ne milake kitchen me..
DAYA-he bhagwan inka ye kiku puran sunane se to accha hai main ye zehar kha ke maar jaau.
Daya thoda sa khana or khata hai. Phir.
DAYA-mera pet bhar gaya.
NIYATI-are itna sa khaya.
DAYA-aaj tabiyat kuch thik nahi hai isliye khane ka maan nahi hai.
NIYATI-haa hota hai. Tum room me chalo main tumhe tumhari medicins de deti hu.
DAYA-ji.