(Katniss POV)

"There are two types of people. One is the kind that will fall apart under the slightest pressure. The other is the kind that rises up during the hardest trials. The moment makes the man, not the other way around."

I remember reading this on a plaque while exploring the bunker, as it has slowly increased on the impact that it has on me. Since Peeta and I talked, I knew that I had to be strong again for others sake. The situation is similar to when my Dad died in the accident. My mother fell apart at the seams, so it was my job to step up and rise to the challenge. That time, it was for Prim's sake. She would have starved to death otherwise.

This time, it is a whole nation that is counting on me to step it up.

I am the Mockingjay, the face of the revolution. People seem to be under the impression that without me, there is no revolution. No pressure for a teenager. I'm sure that plenty of teenagers have that much of an impact on that many lives. I have to keep telling myself that, as stupid as it sounds, to prevent myself from crumbling under the pressure.

I have improvised on my depression methods. I stay strong for everyone else. But behind closed doors, I'm a wreck. It isn't just Finnick that makes my heart ache. No, the time spent here alone has allowed some old demons to return in full force.

The moments where I brushed aside my heartache in order to accomplish a bigger task seemed to have stockpiled up for a moment like this. This means that the nightmares are getting worse, which decreases my chances of getting a decent night's sleep. Peeta has visited me several times and stayed overnight with me to help decrease the nightmares. It has been a slight success.

What's sad is that it isn't so much that Peeta is there helping me, it is the fact that he reminds me of a certain someone who is no longer with me. Although the idea helps chase the nightmares away, the heartbreak of losing Finnick increases to the point that it is hard to breathe.

What hurt more for me is to see the interview that we were able to pick up, although Beetee said something about it being about a day old and that the Capitol has been replaying it nonstop over the past 24 hours. But that fact isn't helping pain decrease. It didn't help at all to see him speak to Cesar about supporting Snow. It looks like Snow offered him a deal and Finnick jumped on the opportunity to betray his friends in order to save himself. But the end of the interview is what took me by surprise. I could have sworn that I saw Cesar slip something to Finnick, but I can't tell what.

Based on the looks of the others faces around me, I am the only one who noticed. In fact, the others seem far too busy arguing about Finnick's true motivations to notice the slip. The other Victors, like Peeta and Haymitch, are arguing for Finnick knowing how to manipulate Snow. While the soldiers, like soldier York, seem to believe that Finnick has sold his soul to save his own skin.

As the arguing increases, my patience wears thinner and thinner. The arguing continues until I snap.

"Will everyone please stop talking about Finnick as if you know what is going on in his head? I'm so sick of people assuming they know him! You all know jack shit about him, so shut up and learn a little more about him before you go off and make assumptions about him! He can be dead for all we know and this is how you honor someone who died for the cause? You people make me sick."

My explosion catches everyone by surprise. Even though I had shown my face more around the bunker, I still remained pretty silent most of the time. Everyone looks shocked, except for Prim, who looks like she is proud of me for standing up for Finnick.

I give Prim a small smile, before I quickly leave the room in order to save face. As I walk back, my thoughts stay on the District 4 victor.

I can't believe that people would question Finnick's true motivations. Even if Finnick doesn't feel the same way for me as I do him, he still displayed selfless acts that prove that he would never betray the revolution. But the people here would rather assume that they know the real Finnick Odair. The think that the real Finnick Odair is the one that they say on the cameras, smiling and flirting.

But I have seen the real Finnick Odair, which is far better than the fake Finnick Odair could ever dream of. That is the one I miss. The one that had the biggest impact on me.

When I reach my room, I close and lock the door in order to hide myself from the world again. That's when I realize that I myself questioned Finnick's motivations during the interview, even if it was for the slightest second. But even so, despite that, I was willing to defend him somewhat blindly against strangers and friends alike. That isn't something I would do on a normal basis.

Damn Finnick, making me defend you. Get your perfect ass back here so I can properly yell at you. Wow, thank god I kept that thought in my head there.

I am grateful that my thoughts are interrupted by a slight knock on my door. I would rather be left alone, but I really don't want to think about my feelings either. So, I don't mind putting up with some other person to prevent me from dealing with my complicated feelings.

When I open the door, the sight of the person in front of me takes all the breath out of me. This can't be real, can it?

"Hello Ms. Everdeen. Did you miss me?"

All I can whisper is, "Oh my God…"