I got a super long review from Ruerue123 that kind of got this chapter out faster. I love hearing what you guys think of this story! It's so great to know that you're really enjoying it.

There was one more fight before the final ranks were announced. I'd won one of my fights and lost one. That basically meant that I needed to win this fight to get a good ranking, even if my team won last night. I wanted to make sure that I made it to the next stage of initiation.

As soon as T and I walked into the training room together, all eyes flashed up to us. The hair on my arms stood up as an uncomfortable feeling settled in the pit of my stomach. I felt T tense and followed his eyes up to the board of fighting pairs. He and I were fighting each other; that was why all the others were staring at us. They knew how close we were and that this wasn't going to be pretty.

Despite the sinking feeling in my stomach, I held my head high. Every one of them was looking for a reaction, including Lance who hadn't even blinked since the two of us walked in. I wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of getting one, I was going to do this fight and give it my all. I knew that T was going to beat me, he was a better fighter than I was. I also knew this was killing him just as much as it was killing me.

"Today is the final day of stage one," Lance announced, making all the eyes look away from T and me thankfully. "You've been paired with an initiate of equal strength and skill level. I didn't pair you, the people that have come in and watched you train and fight did so it would be fair. It's not just based on your fights, it's also based on your size and the style you use. If you're fast, you're paired against someone who's fast."

That explained a lot. T and I were at the same level of training, we'd both beaten people that were larger than us by speed and agility. Those factors weren't going to help us this time, we were going to have to figure out the other's weakness to win and that made my stomach give a nasty jolt.

Kadence was up against Bailey and I knew she'd win. Bailey hasn't quite grasped the concept that she has to protect both her face and her body, not just one or the other. Kadence didn't have a certain technique, but I knew she could hold her own and more on the mat with Bailey.

After we got back from capture the flag, we all raided the kitchen and ate chocolate cake as Fiona and I recounted what it was like to actually get the flag. T and Zeke told a hilarious story of shooting Leo in the chest and making him scream like a little girl in surprise. I was so happy that I had this experience, these people could make me forget everything bad in my life and replace it with happy memories. I let them fill me up, fizzy and warm, until the bubbled out of my mouth in peals of laughter.

"Damn, that's tough luck, stiff. She's going to kick your ass," Eric said, knocking their shoulders together roughly.

I didn't know what to say to him, but my cheeks heated up quickly at his words. I hated how easily he affected me, it was so frustrating! All he'd done was kiss me yet I was blushing like much more had happened. Well, it was quite a kiss, but that's beside the point. I had to focus on fighting T instead of worrying about Eric and our kiss.

The first fight was Eric and Elijah, and that made fear prickle at the base of my spine. I knew it was a pretty even fight, but I was still scared for Eric. I saw Kadence's face and knew she was feeling the same way. She made her way over to T and me, taking my hand in hers as Lance told them to take the mat.

There were no pauses and I knew there would be no conceding, the two of them would fight until one of them couldn't. Eric's fist connected with the bottom of Elijah's chin, making his head fly backwards and Kadence wince. Elijah threw a punch back at Eric that made his teeth clang together and my grip on Kadence's hand tighten.

Elijah didn't wait before clapping both of his hands over Eric's ears, disorienting him. Then he brought his knee up into Eric's ribs twice before he regained his wits about himself and started fighting back. He waited until Elijah brought his leg up to kick him again and grabbed him by the ankle, pulling his feet out from under him.

I heard all the breath rush out of Elijah's lungs quickly before he started gasping. Eric's face was a hard mask and I knew he wasn't himself at that moment. He was fighting for his life and wouldn't stop until he had to. I'd seen that look on his face before, the night that Lance tried to make me stay with him, but I wasn't afraid then. I was now, I didn't want him to hurt Elijah because he didn't deserve it. Lance on the other hand…

I thought the fight was going to be over until Elijah's hand shot out and grabbed Eric's ankle, flattening him out. I gasped before I could stop myself, but I wasn't the only one. Eric's head hit the ground pretty hard and bounced with a sickening thudding noise, but he was still conscious and fighting as hard as he could.

The fight went on for about ten more minutes before Eric aimed a punch at Elijah's temple and knocked him unconscious. That was the same move I'd used to knock him out, he must've been taking notes from me.

"Winner: Eric," Lance announced as Eric and Leo helped a woozy Elijah off of the mat and to the infirmary. "Next match: Kadence and Bailey."

I squeezed her hand before letting go and watching her move up to the mat with Bailey. I hadn't watched either of them fight since the first day when I'd beat Bailey and Maddison had beat Kadence. I really hope Kadence won, but I saw the fire in Bailey's eyes that told me she was going to go down fighting this time.

Kadence struck out first, balancing all her weight on one foot and striking Bailey's cheek with her fist. To say I was surprised would be an understatement, I never knew Kadence had that much strength in her. Bailey seemed as surprised as I was and just blinked her eyes stupidly as Kadence brought her foot up against the girl's ribs, kicking out with her toes pointed to dig in between the ribs painfully.

Bailey grabbed Kadence's leg and twisted it harshly, making the bone crack and Kadence scream shrilly. It took everything in me and T's restraining hand on my arm to stop me from running up to her. I thought she'd tap out, but she kept going with the fight. She pulled Bailey forward with her broken ankle and kneed her in the nose as hard as she could.

I wondered briefly if any of the initiates had ever died during initiation. These fights got brutal, and that was putting it nicely, and some people didn't stop until they were forced to. I would ask Teagan at lunch today, if I made it that far without going unconscious. I knew that if we had to fight, T and I would fight until we couldn't continue. Neither of us would take pity on the other, we respected each other too much for that.

The force of Kadence's knee knocked Bailey out cold, leaving her flat on her back on the floor. Her chest was rising and falling slowly, but she wasn't moving. I expected to see guilt on Kadence's face, but all I saw was pride and a touch of pain.

"Winner, Kadence," Lance announced. "Next fight: T and Rhys."

He and I walked up to the mat together and shook hands, maintaining eye contact the entire time. I knew there was a chance I wouldn't win this fight, T was a really good fighter. I also knew that I was a really good fighter when I turned off my emotions, I just had to go into autopilot and fight him like he wasn't my best friend.

I waited for him to make the first move and launched myself, but I didn't expect him to fake it. He took advantage of me launching out and sent a swift kick to my chest. Lucky for me, I'd just taken a breath or I'd be gasping with the force of it. I righted myself and tried to remember the way he'd moved when he'd fought Eric.

He always kept his body moving, even if he'd been hit. What I needed to do was make it impossible for him to keep lashing out at me. I couldn't figure out how to do that just yet, I just dodged all of his moves. Maybe if I tired him out, it would be easier to find a weak spot. When people were tired, they got sloppy.

"Stop playing around, red. Make a move!" Lance shouted, knocking me out of my concentration.

T wasn't expecting that and ended up slamming his foot into my ribcage really hard. I couldn't help the cry that left my mouth as blood filled it up. I'd chomped down on my tongue when he'd hit me. I spat it on the floor before gathering my strength in the pit of my stomach. If he wanted to play all in, I was going to play all in.

I brought my foot up as high as I could get it and kicked him in the side of the head. I missed and he grabbed it, pulling until I fell to the mat. I didn't pause, I grabbed his foot and knocked him to the ground with me. The ache in my ribs was gone when I connected my fist with his face.

We fought on the floor for a little while longer, him regaining his place on top of me and getting a few good blows in before we stood back up. I spat another mouthful of blood out before I brought my foot up and connected it with his temple. His eyes roll back in his head as he hit the mat again except he didn't get up this time. I wanted to help him get up, but I was doing well to stay on my own two feet with the throbbing in my ribcage coming back tenfold.

"Winner, Rhys," Lance announced. "Next fight: Frankie and James."

I spat yet another mouthful of blood onto the floor as I struggled to make it to a bench before I collapsed. My ribs were on fire and black dots were ghosting around my line of vision, telling me that I was about to pass out. Eric came up next to me as my mouth filled up with more blood that I spat out near his feet.

"That's too much blood," he whispered. "You need to get checked out, blaze."

If I wasn't in as much pain as I was, I would've fought him on that. I just let him lift me into his arms and even whimpered when the movement jostled my aching ribs. He held me gently but securely as he made his way to the infirmary quickly.

"Is that another one from initiation? That's the third one in thirty minutes," a woman's disembodied voice said, but I was too woozy to open my eyes and see what her face looked like. "That's too much blood to be a surface wound. She's got to have internal bleeding, I'm going to need to see inside of her."

Before I could ask any questions, I felt a sharp prick on my arm as ice flooded my veins and everything went black.

I felt a prickly feeling in my side that kept me from inhaling too deeply without a sharp twist of pain. I held in all the noises that I wanted to let out and forced my eyes open, no matter how hard my body rejected the idea of it.

It took a second for my eyes to become acclimated to the darkness. I only heard one other person breathing in the room which told me I wasn't in the dormitory. I tried to sit up, but any sort of movement sent prickles of pain through me and made me whimper pathetically.

"Hey, I'm up," Eric's voice was groggy as he woke up slowly. "I wasn't sleeping, I was completely conscious the entire time I sat here, I swear."

I raised my eyebrows at him only to realize a couple seconds later that he couldn't see it. I actually laughed out loud at that and felt him take my hand in his. He ran his calloused thumb over my knuckles soothingly as his breathing slowed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked in a voice rough with sleep, it actually sounded really good…

"Where am I? What happened?" I asked, trying to sit up again only for him to push me back down by my shoulders.

"You've got four broken ribs, they're being mended right now. They nicked the lining of some organ and had you bleeding internally," he explained, continuing to rub my knuckles soothingly as he spoke. "They stitched up all the tearing and gave you a bone-mending serum. You should be all good by tomorrow –today I guess."

"Is that why there was so much blood earlier?" I asked him.

"Yeah, but you're going to be good now," he told me, scooting his chair closer to my bed and brushing my hair out of my face. "You scared the hell out of me, blaze."

"What are you talking about? I just got kicked in the ribs," I forced out, trying to ignore the sparks that his touch was sending up my arm.

"I'm going to turn this light on," he warned me before flipping on the switch and making a light next to my bed turn on. "You just kept bleeding and Madge freaked out about all the blood."

I had a lot of questions about what had happened, but I wanted to take a self-evaluation first. I had all my fingers and all my toes felt like they were still in place. I could move my legs and my arms so they weren't broken. I felt my face and every piece was still in place and my nose was straight so it wasn't broken again.

Without thinking I raised my tank top up to look at my ribs. They were covered in multicolored bruises and I had a line of stitches a couple inches away from the ribcage. I ran my fingers over them gingerly, they felt rough against my fingertips. I'd never gotten stitches before and they felt odd, but they didn't really hurt. I couldn't help but think that they made me look very Dauntless and it made me smile.

"Madge said they should dissolve in a few hours and your ribs should be healed by then, too. I already asked because I knew you'd want to know as soon as you woke up," Eric said quietly.

"Why did you kiss me?" I asked, looking everywhere but his eyes.

His movements stilled as he took a quick breath. "Oh yeah, that did happen, didn't it? Wow, I kind of hoped that you'd forgot about that."

"That didn't answer my question, asshole. Why did you kiss me after you told me that you hated me?" I asked him, my temper rising as I tore my hand out of his grip.

"I don't hate you, not even in the slightest. I hate that you're better than me at everything we ever do without trying. I hate that you're so gorgeous that it distracts me. I hate that you'd chose the stiff over me every single time," he said, jumping out of his chair and pacing with his hands behind his back. "I hate that I can't put how I feel for you into words that aren't negative.

"I did nothing for sixteen years other than read and learn things. I should know how to handle this situation. I'm intelligent, but you make me feel like I'm an idiot," he kept ranting as he paced. "I want to be the one that you run to when something bad happens, the one you run to when you're so excited that you're in autopilot and just going where your feet take you. I know that's always going to be the stiff and I can't change that."

He was laying himself bare in front of me, putting all his cards on the table. I didn't know how to respond to that, he wasn't the kind of guy to do this without ulterior motives and I wasn't the girl to just believe him. People were never who they wanted you to think that they were, I'd learned that the hard way.

"I don't know why you hate my relationship with T so much. He's my best friend and that's it," I said, figuring I'd start with that and work through everything else. "He's a good person, I don't get why you hate him so much."

"He's the reason you're in that bed and you're defending him! This is ridiculous!" he shouted, making me flinch. "I stayed with you to make sure you were okay and he's still the one that gets you!"

"I'm not a fucking trophy! No one 'gets' me," I shouted back at him. "I like you, Eric, I really do. You scare me a lot, I'm not going to lie. You're a loose cannon and you give no warning before you go off. T has done nothing but be nice to me and try and help me since we got here. You even told me that you just wanted me for sex!"

"He hurt you so badly that you needed emergency surgery and you're STILL defending him!" he replied. "You're so pathetic! It's like those girls who defend their abusive boyfriends."

That hit a little close to home and I could tell he saw it on my face. "You're not going to fight with me about it? Did you have a boyfriend back in Amity that like to rough you up? What'd he do? Hit you with rotten apples? Play the wrong notes on a banjo and hurt your ears?"

I was never one of those girls that cried whenever she was angry, but I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't keep them in, they poured down my cheeks in waves. I wanted to be mad that I wasn't strong enough to keep them in. I wanted to be mad that I wasn't strong enough to keep myself from falling apart. Maybe being strong wasn't staying put together all the time, maybe it was falling apart...

"I was raped by the boy I attacked that day at the gates," I told him, not even trying to sound strong when I spoke. "That's why I don't want you to get close to me, I don't want anyone to get close to me because I know they can hurt you beyond repair."

That made him stop pacing, he wasn't moving or breathing from what I could tell. I ignored ache in my body as I forced myself up so I could touch his arm. He looked down at my hand before taking it into his and placing a kiss on the inside of my palm.

It was such a gentle action, something so unlike Eric that it burned me. I felt like he'd branded me with a hot iron against my skin. I couldn't break his intense gaze as he sat down beside my hips on the bed, his brushing against mine with only the thin cover and our pants between us. Everything between us felt hushed and intimate in a way that scared me and thrilled me at the same time.

"I am so sorry," he breathed out, his eyes glassy. Then he reached up and held my face in his feather-light grip. "I am so, so, so sorry, Rhys."

"Marhysa," I told him in the same tone. "Call me Marhysa."

"Marhysa," he whispered my name like a prayer as he pressed his forehead against mine. "I'm so sorry, Marhysa."

I shifted my head and pressed my lips against his this time. I pushed all the fear and all the weakness down. All that I felt in this moment was the heat gathering between Eric and me, the way his lips ghosted against mine. It was almost like he was afraid I'd break if he kissed me too harshly.

I thought I'd be upset that he was treating me like I was breakable, but I wasn't. I would never admit it in the light of day, but I liked it when Eric treated me like I was fragile. I'd never wanted to be fragile before, I'd always detested it. Yet with his hands holding me like I was fine china in the dim, honey-colored light of the infirmary, I felt like it was where I was supposed to be.

When he pulled away, he stayed close to me. "I told you that because I felt so gutted when you said it was a mistake that we'd danced together that night."

"I know that, T told me that you just said that because you were hurting," I told him, running my fingers over the side of his hair. "When did you get a haircut?"

He laughed and ran a hand over it. "A couple days ago, blaze. You're not too observant, are you?"

And just like that, he and I were back to our normal bantering selves. I liked that it could be that way for us. I'd just told him a secret that could've ruined our… whatever we had, but it didn't. I had a feeling it just increased it.

Thanks for reading, as always!