Before-notes:
1. Reviews are nice :).
CHAPTER 16: LIGHT
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Tyrell's cell
"It's been awhile," Tyrell said.
"Yeah," Myalkni mumbled in response.
'It's been awhile' sounded like two friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time and were eager to spend time together. That would be nice. The truth wasn't anything like that.
A "special honor", that was what they had called it. Latakia had told Myalkni that Arcanus had assigned him the "special honor" of being the one to "tend to" Tyrell. Myalkni realized that he would actually prefer the "honor" of burning another Morgallian caravan. He'd easily sacrifice scores of people for the sake of sparing himself this agony. The realization was dreadful, but he couldn't deny that it was true.
Myalkni knew exactly what lay behind this. By doing this to Tyrell, he would be forced to destroy himself further, in order to live with the shame. At the same time, he knew he couldn't disobey the order, or else things would just get worse. Thus, he'd have to be the one to break Tyrell down. He'd torture and break Tyrell just like Latakia had tortured him before. He loathedeverything about this.
Myalkni clenched his hand into a fist and slugged himself. If only I wasn't such a worthless piece of crap!
There were so many times he had bungled it. He had blown his chance to kill Arcanus by hesitating. He had screwed up his escape attempt, and then he gave in to the pain and helped Latakia burn that caravan. And worst of all, he had betrayed Tyrell and Karis after they'd traveled across half of Morgal to rescue him.
Myalkni smashed his fist into his leg again. It hurt, but he barely cared anymore. It almost felt good.
I should've died, rather than end up doing all this crap to others, Myalkni thought. I should've killed myself ages ago.
He could no longer even use the argument that, being a prince, he should stay alive. After all the crap he'd done, he couldn't possibly pretend to be a decent human being, let alone a worthy prince or even a king.
The only reason I'm still alive, Myalkni thought, is fear of death. He didn't think his existence was worth anything anymore, but somehow the idea of it ending still terrified him. And, of course, that fear was also what Arcanus and Latakia used to control him.
Myalkni smashed his hand into the wall in frustration.
He knew Tyrell was watching him. Myalkni hated that, but wasn't sure why. After already betraying Tyrell, what was the point of feeling embarrassed around him for smacking himself?
Myalkni looked over at Tyrell. His eyes first rested on the ring that was still on Tyrell's finger. Will Tyrell use my own ring to heal the wounds I'll give him?
Tyrell was wearing only an aged pair of breeches, his muscular chest bare. Myalkni noticed that he was in much better shape than most of the other prisoners. Nevertheless Myalkni knew his body would eventually wither away just like his soul would. That was what happened to every prisoner here, unless they were killed first.
Myalkni's eyes eventually wandered up to Tyrell's face. Tyrell's expression looked more uncertain than angry, like he was sizing up the situation. Nevertheless, Myalkni couldn't stand to look meet Tyrell's gaze. He quickly averted his own gaze, looking down at the ground instead.
Tyrell's stare had been burning into Myalkni the entire time. Even if Tyrell's expression wasn't angry, those piercing eyes were accusing him. They were blaming him, and they were right to.
Myalkni knew he had to, but there was no way he could do this.
Tyrell's voice cut through the silence. "So, you're the Lord Myalkni who has come for me?"
"Yeah, that's me."
"I could never think of you as anything but Amiti," Tyrell said.
Myalkni scowled. "Myalkni is my real name though," he explained. "Amiti is what the court named me, but my mother wanted to name me Myalkni. 'Amiti' is this polite prince you first met, but on the inside I am always Myalkni."
"Why didn't you ever tell us that before, when we were traveling together?"
"I didn't know. Arcanus told me after he kidnapped me."
"Arcanus… is he your father?"
"…Yeah, he is."
Tyrell sounded like he had been suspecting this. Myalkni went a little cold inside. He hoped it was just because some other prisoner had told him. He shuddered.
"When I first came to Ayuthay," reflected Tyrell, "I thought that Paithos was your father. I still kinda do."
Myalkni had never really thought of it that way. "He might've seemed like a father but he was also the king. He had a whole kingdom of other people to care for."
"I could tell that he saw you like a son though," Tyrell said. "How is he nowadays? I never heard about you taking over the king job, so I guess he's all better now, right?"
"Yeah, he got better," Myalkni said. "I was really relieved, for the whole country… and myself."
"You don't want the throne?"
"I'm terrified of it," Myalkni replied, "but I'm not sure I can think of another person I'd rather have as king either."
"You don't think you'd be a good king?" Tyrell asked.
"I definitely have ideas about how the place should be run, but I… just don't think I'd make a good king. I barely stay afloat as a prince. Every single action I make could cause a catastrophe. I… don't think I could handle such responsibility… "
How can I talk to him like this so freely, Myalkni wondered, perturbed by himself. Tyrell wasn't some great friend anymore. I betrayed him, and now I'm the guard and he's the prisoner. He has every reason to use everything against me. How can I trust him like this?
But Myalkni couldn't stop. "I hate living in the court," he continued. "Everyone there hates me there, I swear, and I have to watch every word that comes out of my mouth.
"When I first met you guys," Myalkni confessed, "I was happy, like I hadn't been for a long time. When I thought you were going to leave, I was terrified. Thankfully, getting the Insight Mirror made a convenient excuse to come with you…"
"It was good, being with you," Tyrell said. "After we parted, I missed you."
"Yeah," Myalkni mumbled. "I… missed you too."
It felt like there was a rock in Myalkni's throat. A spiky rock. He wanted really badly to have a friend right now and wanted to believe he did have a friend, even though he knew he didn't.
"Even then, though, you could tell that I wasn't completely at ease very often, right?" Myalkni asked.
"... Well, yeah, you seemed uptight sometimes," Tyrell said.
"I always worried that I wasn't really part of the group, that I was just tagging along. You all came from foreign lands and your parents all knew each other, while I had been pampered in the court for most of my life. I was afraid that I didn't understand anything about the lives of people in the outside world, and that it showed. I was always afraid I was saying things that sounded ignorant or offensive without realizing it."
"Really, you weren't that bad. A lot of the things you did were funny, in a good way," Tyrell said. "Remember when we were about to leave Ayuthay, and you didn't realize you'd have to change your clothes?"
"Yeah…"
"That was hilarious. It was kinda cute, really. It wasn't anything that would make people dislike you."
"That's good to hear," Myalkni said blandly.
"Just like I said back then, you don't have to worry about standing out, because no one stands out more than me," Tyrell said, with a grin.
Myalkni felt a wave of affection for Tyrell. It was one of the most horrible things he had ever felt. He understood everything now. Tyrell's kind words were a way of torturing him. This was his revenge, and it was working.
"You remember that djinn we had to put up with in Kolima?" Tyrell asked.
"…Yeah, I do," Myalkni said, with a weak laugh.
And with that, Tyrell began reminiscing about various episodes of their group's journey across Angara.
Myalkni felt a deep longing for those days. Even though they had been involved in some serious affairs, it somehow felt like he had been childlike and innocent back then. He had been ignorant about some things, but he'd been happy. Everything was simple and seemed to make sense. Now, everything was messed up and nothing made sense.
Even then, I knew it would eventually come to an end. "When you return you will be a man," Paithos had said before I departed, Myalkni remembered. And he remembered the dread he had felt when he heard that. He would be a man, responsible for his mistakes, and worse, he could be a king, whose mistakes could cost the whole kingdom.
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Karis' cell
Zhungmyen had been told her job was "critically important". She had been assigned to oversee over 40 prisoners all cramped into one chamber, and among them was one of the young adepts that the Tuaparang had "special uses" for. She was the only one assigned to it.
Zhungmyen could tell something was coming. She could sense it in the air. Of course, maybe it was just her; maybe she was convincing herself her fears were true. But even so, the risk was always there. Forty prisoners could easily overcome her, especially considering that one was an adept.
To make matters worse, many of these prisoners worked in, of all things, the facility's weapons depot. The depot stored weapons to be used in case of a revolt, but in this case it was likely to facilitate the revolt instead. Any potential rebel would know immediately where to go first.
Regardless of whether the revolt was successful in the end, Zhungmyen knew that she would be the first casualty. All that stood between the prisoners and her life was fear. Any day could be her last.
Zhungmyen turned the handle and entered. She may have been terrified, but she wasn't surprised when she was pounced upon by a horde of prisoners as soon as she'd closed the door.
They quickly wrestled her to the ground and smothered her. She could barely breathe, and she tasted blood in her mouth as kicks and punches rained in on her from all directions.
"Kill the traitor!" one of them cried, before stomping on her unprotected chest. A rush of blood and a cry of agony forced their way up through her throat.
Zhungmyen didn't even try to breathe. So this is the end. She considered putting up a fight, but decided against it. She was an adept, but a weak one. She had no hope for survival, the Tuaparang wouldn't want her killing prisoners, and she didn't really want to either. She didn't blame the prisoners a bit. She really did deserve to be slaughtered.
"Hold it!" cried a female voice. "Let her breathe!"
"Are you crazy?" a prisoner asked incredulously. "This traitor will rat us out if we let her live!"
"Don't you know? She used to be one of us," another roared, "but she agreed to be a guard for the Tuaparang! She's the worst scum in the world!"
"She's kills and tortures us, despite having been a prisoner in this very cell before! We suffered so much because we refused to join the Tuaparang, and now you won't let us have justice on traitors like her?!"
"She killed my wife, just to prove her loyalty!" cried one of them. It was true. It had been totally unnecessary, but Latakia had wanted to be sure that Zhungmyen wouldn't betray the Tuaparang, so she had to kill the prisoner whom she had previously been closest to.
"You will let her breathe," hissed the girl, "or else. Remember who I am."
And they released her. Somehow, this girl had power over them. She must be the adept, Zhungmyen realized.
The other prisoners didn't seem very happy about it though. They were glaring furiously at the girl.
"Thank you," Zhungmyen croaked, as her savior came into sight. The girl looked to be about eighteen, but she possessed an aura of conviction far beyond her age. She wore her green hair back in a ponytail, and her eyes were violet. Why had she intervened?
"Why are we denied justice?" demanded one of the prisoners who had previously been attacking Zhungmyen.
"I can't guarantee justice," the girl said, "but I'm confident I can win us freedom. If you want freedom, you'll have to trust me. Let me handle this; you'll see."
The prisoners seemed to grudgingly accept this. Grumblings rippling through the crowd, but none of them touched Zhungmyen.
The girl turned again to face Zhungmyen. "If you haven't figured it out already, we're staging an escape attempt here. As you probably also know, I am a powerful adept. In fact, I am Karis, the daughter of Ivan, one of the Warriors of Vale. I can put you through agony with a snap of my fingers… unless you cooperate with us."
"What must I do?" Zhungmyen asked.
Before Karis could answer, dissent erupted from the other prisoners.
"First you make us spare her, now you ask us to trust her?!"
"She betrayed us before, and now she is betraying the Tuaparang. Who's to say she won't defect a third time?"
"As a guard, she knows this place well," Karis argued. "She knows which areas are patrolled at which times. Her help could be vital in getting out of this place."
Some of the prisoners seemed to accept this logic, but others didn't.
"Who's to say she won't sell us out for rewards with her bosses?"
"You think I'd rather stay here than escape this place? I hate everything about this place!" Zhungmyen exclaimed. "I would join your revolt willingly, thoughtlessly, if I knew it would succeed!"
"I can't say for sure," Karis said, "but I'm pretty confident. I'm an adept, there are a good two score of us, and help will arrive by boat."
"Well, now you have another adept at your disposal," Zhungmyen stated.
"You're an adept?!" exclaimed one of the prisoners. "How did we not know this?"
"I concealed it from you all… and from the Tuaparang," answered Zhungmyen. "I didn't want to be used."
"You're still a traitor though," snarled one of the prisoners.
"Oh, stop it," said another. "We can settle our scores with her after we've gotten out of this place, but until then we're in this together."
"I'm not in this together with her!"
"Would you rather get captured by the guards?" asked one of the prisoners who'd originally been holding Zhungmyen down. "She's scum, but right now she's some pretty helpful scum for us. It would be stupid to forsake her help."
The majority of the prisoners seemed to agree with this sentiment.
"You plan to go first to the weapons depot, don't you?" asked Zhungmyen.
"Yes, that is our plan," affirmed Karis.
"Then let me warn you- do not take the main route that you probably usually take. There is no way you will make it into the place that way without getting caught."
"Do you know another route?" asked Karis.
"Yes," Zhungmyen said. "The depot has a back entrance and there's a corridor leading to it. I doubt they'd guard it very heavily. It'll take longer, but it'll be safer."
"Will there be guards in the warehouse?" a prisoner asked.
"Yes, there will. However, I think we can handle them. We will outnumber them, two of us are adepts and the rest can quickly grab weapons. They are mostly are stored in the back, immediately accessible from the end of the corridor."
"It's true," noted one of the prisoners. "They are all in the back."
The prisoners all seemed to content to follow Zhungmyen's directions. If any of them weren't, they were keeping their mouths shut.
"Alright, let's get going," said Karis. "We don't have time to lose."
-~:|~~|:-:|~~|:~-
Tyrell's cell
"I'm sorry," Amiti cried. "I'm so sorry, Tyrell. Words can't express how sorry I am."
Tyrell took that as his cue to move on to the elephant in the room. "Why…why did you do as Latakia said? Why did you chain me?"
Amiti stared at him in silence.
"Together, we could've beaten her," lamented Tyrell. "We could've won, Amiti!"
Amiti was shaking his head slowly and shutting his eyes. He wanted to be somewhere else… or someone else. He wasn't sure where, or who, but he desperately wanted anything but this.
"We could have been free!" Tyrell cried. "Didn't you see?"
Amiti turned away from him, still saying nothing.
"Why won't you answer me?" Tyrell bellowed.
Amiti slowly turned around, clutching his robes, his eyes wet. "I'm so sorry," he said again.
"Yeah, I got that," snapped Tyrell, his frustration at everything seeping into his voice. "I'm asking why you did it!"
"I… I was scared… I… I had… no choice."
"Oh come on, there must be more than that, isn't there?" cried Tyrell. "That just sounds pathetic!"
With this, something seemed to break within Amiti. He slid down the wall behind him, as he slowly collapsed to the floor.
Amiti may have originally come under orders to torture Tyrell, but it was easy for Tyrell to see that Amiti was now at his mercy. This twist in events was surely good for Tyrell, but it felt awful. He actually hadn't intended for all that to come out so harshly. It was times like this where he wondered if Karis was right, that his mouth and his temper always got the better of him.
"I'm cursed," Amiti said.
"What do you mean?"
"Latakia cursed me. I have to follow all their orders, or I'm rolling on the ground in agony. I don't know of any way to rid myself of it."
Tyrell bit his lip, for once.
"I know," Amiti choked. "I KNOW I could have just endured it, rolling on the ground while you two defeated her. I know I could've done that, knowing that it would be worth it in the end. But… I couldn't, and I didn't… because I'm a piece of utter crap."
Amiti let out a pained sigh. "I know I betrayed you," he ejected. "I know I blew it, badly. I know; you don't have to tell me anything."
Tyrell opened his mouth, but Amiti wouldn't stop.
"I know you hate me now," he said. "And you have every reason to."
"But, Amiti, I don't," Tyrell said. Tyrell supposed Amiti was right; there were have many good reasons to hate him. But somehow, Tyrell just didn't.
"Don't lie to me," Amiti retorted. "I know you're hate my guts right now. I know. I don't want your white lies."
"Amiti…" Tyrell started. But he stopped himself. He didn't have a clue what to say.
"Just be glad you're not scum like me…" Amiti mumbled.
Amiti, please stop this, Tyrell begged silently.
"All I ask is this: Please don't hate me," Amiti said with a quiet conviction, "because you don't need to. I do that for you. I hate myself much more than you ever could."
Tyrell didn't doubt it.
"Throughout all of this, I always wished I could have been like you," Amiti confessed. "You travelled across a country to rescue me and endured Latakia's torture without a single scream. Icouldn't even endure it when your freedom depended on it. You did all that… just so I could betray you and make it pointless in the end."
The sound of Amiti's teardrop hitting the ground echoed lightly around the cell.
"If I wasn't so worthless," he lamented, "it would never be like this now."
Tyrell thought of all the times he had cursed himself for not living up to his father's example. Tyrell wasn't so sure he was the perfect person that Amiti seemed to think he was.
"That's why I ask you to forgive me," Amiti said, "because you're a good person."
"What do you mean?" asked Tyrell.
"I know this sounds really lame," Amiti said, "but it's not my fault I'm a bad person. I'm a bad person because of two things: my upbringing, and the traits I inherited from my parents. I had no control over either of those.
"Good people do good things, even for people who don't deserve a bit of it," he continued. "Good people forgive people who don't deserve it.
"I don't deserve your forgiveness, but could you please forgive me anyway, for everything I've done and will do? Because even though it's all my fault, that's because I'm such a bad person, which isn't really my fault."
Amiti stared at Tyrell pleadingly.
"Wow, I must sound really, really pathetic to you right now," Amiti admitted, with an ironic laugh. "That's because I really am pathetic. That's how I truly feel. Now you see my true face."
"Amiti…" Tyrell said, trailing off again.
"What I'm trying to say is…. Could you please just forgive me, even though I don't deserve it… just because it'll make me less miserable?" Amiti asked weakly. "It's agony everyday. Just, please, forgive me, because… it's a good thing to do, and… good people like you do good things…"
Tyrell took a breath, and then spoke.
"Amiti, the story isn't over," he said. "Life isn't over."
"…what do you mean?" Amiti asked, raising his head to meet Tyrell's gaze.
"If you had a chance to redeem yourself," asked Tyrell, "would you take it?"
"I'm not sure that's even possible, after all I've done…"
"But if there was, would you take it?"
"…Yes," Amiti said. "Yes, I would."
"Good, because you can," said Tyrell, before proceeding to tell Amiti about the planned jailbreak.
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Next Chapter: The Shattered Cage
Author's notes:
Zhungmyen's nameis from Chinese zhèngmiàn (正面), meaning "façade". The 'zh' is pronounced like the 's' in measure or leisure.
Originally, Zhungmyen was going to be Feizhi from GS1 in disguise (hence the name). I ditched the idea because Feizhi's ability for premonition would've caused all sorts of problems for the plot (for example, she would have been obligated to tell the Tuaparang about the coming revolt).
Please don't forget to review :). Just tell me anything you think about the chapter… I'd really like to know. Constructive criticism, comments, anything that comes to mind… its all good :).