I sat there crying with my head down into my arms, I heard the door open but I didn't really care. After a couple of minutes I heard it close and this time I did look up but there was no one there. I wiped my face with the sleeves of my blazer and stood up grabbing my stuff and making a quick escape to go home. I just wanted to lay in my bed and ignore the rest of the world.
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I was laying in my bed trying to figure out Dimitri's actions for everything when I heard a soft knock on my bedroom door.
I sat up and quickly called out to come in. The door opened and Elizabeth walked in a few steps. "Rose a friend from school is here to see you, are you up for company?" She asked.
I nodded my head at here, completely confused as to who could be here. She walked out and I heard her talking to someone and then Ryan entered the room. He stood there with his hands stuffed into his jean pockets and I could see him staring at me taking everything in. He crossed the room and sat down tentatively on the edge of the bed and continued to silently stare at me. "Rose are you okay?" he asked.
I looked down at the comforter and didn't quite know how to answer, I wanted to badly someone to confine in; like I did with Lissa; I quickly pushed that thought out of my head and shook my head side to side. I stopped realizing that he would take this as me saying that I'm not alright and not really seeing the gesture for what it was. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to him, I was shocked by the what he did that I didn't know what to do or even how to feel; I was still emotionally shell-shocked from what had happened between Dimitri and me today.
So I just stayed there wrapped in his arms with my face resting in the crook of his neck. I could feel myself start to slowly relax, Ryan just had this calming effect on me; that I was really starting to appreciate more and more everyday.
"Rose you know I'm here for you if you need anything right?" He asked me. I still didn't feel like talking so I didn't respond. He put his hands on my arms and gently pushed me away so that he could look at me. I tried holding his gaze, but my thoughts were so confusing and my nerves were shot for the day, I looked down at the ground trying to clear my head.
"Hey…" His voice came out soft, soothing, "Rose, look at me." I did. "I'm here for you, no matter what Rose. You can trust me, I promise you." I don't know why it started, I thought I was done with that for today anyways. But with Ryan looking at me with such concern and with everything he was saying; the tears silently started sliding down my face. He reached up and gently wiped them away with his fingertip but they just kept coming. He pulled back to him and wrapped his arms around me and I wrapped my arms around him, needing the comfort.
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I don't know why I said those words to here. I knew I probably couldn't keep that promise, and that I would probably end up hurting more than anything. But seeing her like that made my heart wrench. I'm not even sure when it started, but I knew I had growing feelings for her, how could I not? I looked down at her wrapped in my arms, and could feel her arms wrapped around me. She was so beautiful, in everyway possible. She was at all not what I had expected. I wanted so bad to be with her how I wanted, but no matter what she would end up getting hurt in the end, no matter how anything played out. I bent down and kissed the top of her head, I could tell that she was calming down. It's funny to think, that I was completely mesmerized by this girl. Maybe I could enjoy this time with her, while I had it; make the most of it.
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I had stopped crying, but I wasn't yet ready to leave the warm comfort that Ryan's arm brought me. I could feel the tears drying on my face and I tried to wipe them away but it was hard with his arms wrapped so securely around me. He gently pushed me away from him, and I wiped my face on the sleeves of a long sleeve baggy sweater I had on. I looked up at him and when I did he brought his hand up and cupped my chin beneath his finger and thumb and tilted my head up slightly and brought his lips down gently on mine. I closed my eyes and melted into the kiss, I felt him move towards me, wrapping an arm behind my shoulders and gently moved us so that I was lying down, and he was half on top of me, his lips never leaving mine. The kiss was slowly heating up, turning into something heated. His hand was warm against my side and he slowly slid his hand underneath my shirt but made no attempt to stray from my side. His hand was so warm against my skin that I could feel my own blood heating up in response. He broke the kiss and looked down at me, concern still dominating the look in his amazing aqua blue eyes, but there was also a look of hunger, and maybe even passion in them too. A couple of strands of his dark hair fell in front of his face, I reached up gently and pushed them out of the way; he closed his eyes and let out a sigh of content at my touch. The sun was going down; I could tell because the soft dusk light was filtering in through my bedroom window and threw the room in a soft blue glow, thanks to the blue curtains covering my window. But the blue light was soft and comforting and when he opened his eyes back up, the soft blue made is aqua blue eyes more brilliant.
My breathe caught in my throat, I felt the air had been taken from me; he was just so beautiful. "Rose, I won't do anything you don't want me to do; but I won't stop kissing you until you smile again." He said, his voice coming out soft yet husky.
"Well, in that case, I might not ever smile again." I heard myself saying before I could even think about it, my voice coming soft and husky too. And then I smiled, because despite all the confusion and how low I was feeling, he managed to comfort me and bring out my sarcastic side.
He looked down smiling at me, "How can you say that and then smile at me, you tease me miss." He said brushing his hand gently down the side of my face.
I just shook my head and smile at him, and slowly got up off of me and grabbed my hand pulling me up into a sitting position.