ACT I

Shiho 1: Uncommon Dedication

Present day

As Shiho and Masae sat across the table from each other, they prepared to share their separate stories, and considered where to begin.

Through an unspoken agreement, Shiho decided to go first. It was Masae who had first made the request, and Masae was more likely to be the one who knew less about the other.

"Before I begin, I have a question, to which I believe I already know the answer," Shiho said. "Instructor Atago, did your parents have a set goal or career in mind for you when they raised you and your sister?"

"No, Instructor Nishizumi," Masae said. "I'm sure you know that I founded the Atago School of Tankery. My family was very supportive of me, but this was not their ultimate plan for me. They only hoped I would find a good job that I was skilled at and happy with, that if I chose to marry, I would marry a good man whom I loved and could trust to raise any children we had well, and that I would also do a good job of raising any grandchildren they had."

"I see," Shiho said. "My mother gave birth to me with a purpose in mind- that I would one day succeed her as head of the Nishizumi School. That was my life's purpose, the main focus of my training, and was my ultimate goal. If I could not accomplish that, I would be of no use to the family. And if I failed, no one would step up to replace me."

"Were you an only child, Instructor Nishizumi?" Hiroko said. "I would think that your mother would have multiple children to serve as multiple candidates for her successor."

"I was," Shiho said. "My father died when I was a young girl, and Mother, who was older than most women when she married, soon reached the point at which she could not have more children. So I was essentially the only possible heiress for the family."

Masae glanced at Miho and Maho, hoping for some cue as to how to react to this, but found nothing. Shiho had never truly known her father, and was not the type who would appreciate empty displays of sympathy.

"My training in tankery began at a very young age," Shiho said, "long before I could reasonably pilot a tank, even by our standards. But there were things I could do to prepare myself, and my mother was unwilling to simply let me remain idle."

Hiroko shook her head. Hiroko was relatively new to tankery, getting involved in middle school, but found that while her cousin Hiroe had willingly spent years preparing for it, when she herself studied and got practical experience, she quickly got almost on par with Hiroe.

"It hardly seems like studying so much at such a young age would do much good, at least compared to getting practical experience once you are ready," Hiroko said. "In fact, it might just end up turning the child off of tankery."

"There was plenty of opportunity for me to get practical experience later," Shiho said. "As for liking it, my parents hoped I would, but believed that was ultimately irrelevant, much like getting children to eat their vegetables. I would even say that a large part of parenting is getting children to do things that they don't like but are good for them."

Masae nodded. Perhaps she and Shiho had different interpretations of that principle, but she could not deny that she had to follow that while raising her daughters.

"So what was it like for you back then, Instructor Nishizumi?" Kinue said, realizing that Shiho's process of learning tankery was most likely different from hers, and even the practice her sister had put in.

"It was a difficult, but necessary and beneficial process," Shiho said. "We do not have the time and I do not have the memory to share every detail, but I will share the general process, as well as certain pivotal and memorable moments."

"Fair enough," Masae said. "I will do the same when discussing my own situation."

"I would start at the beginning," Shiho said, "but I'm not entirely sure when, where or how everything began. Even in my first memories of learning tankery, I had 'always' known I was expected to excel in tankery."

32 years ago

Shiho, at the age of eight, sat in her room in the Nishizumi house, reading over books about tankery. She had completed her homework for the day, but her studies would likely continue until she went to bed.

While the Nishizumi family house, a large and traditional home, was fairly luxurious, Shiho's room was relatively spartan and had few personal touches. She found it easy to stay on task, with little else to do than study tankery.

Her mother had strict expectations for her in school, and while Shiho had a great deal of work for her tankery studies, she was also expected to excel in academics, which were seen as just as important for the development of a good Nishizumi heiress.

As such, Shiho was not entirely sure how to spend her free time, and when she had time available, she would continue to study about tankery. It seemed to be the only responsible thing to do as a future heiress; her mother had stressed that she should do everything possible to prepare herself for her future duties. But more than anything, it seemed to be the only thing that came naturally to her.

Shiho had to wonder- did all parents drill their children in such a way? It seemed unlikely to Shiho that any of her peers had a purpose comparable to hers. A part of Shiho pitied them for not knowing where life would take them when they became adults, but another part had to wonder- was it possible that they could find out for themselves? And what would she do if she had the choice, even if her life had so far guided her in one direction?

Shiho put the thought out of her mind, finding it to be too unsettling to consider, and believing that it was a waste of time to think of the paths that were off limits to her. She told herself that she had her goal, and it was not her place to ask for more.

Present day

"I always knew what to do in order to please my parents," Shiho said. "In the end, it was only a question of applying myself enough to meet their expectations, and to become the tanker they wanted me to be; obedience is something to which parents are entitled from their children. Perhaps it was difficult to meet my parents' expectations, but there was nothing unfeasible, unclear or unreasonable about them."

"I see," Masae said. "It seems somewhat clear that you were forced from a young age to learn tankery with surprising devotion. But what I don't yet understand is you merely accepting it uncritically from a young age, even considering how much children are influenced by their parents. Neither of my daughters, nor my niece were interested in tankery from the start."

As Shiho looked on calmly, preparing to give her answer, Hiroe nodded.

"Yeah," Hiroe said. "Isn't childhood about trying new things until you find something that interests you and you're good at? Some take longer than others to find it, like Kinue, but it's not always a bad thing."

Kinue nodded in agreement.

"I may have given up soccer for tankery, and may have not pursued it with the same fervor as some of my peers, but I don't see it as a waste of time," Kinue said. "I had a lot of fun. I made friends through it, some of whom followed me to Pravda. And I learned the value of good sportsmanship and working as a team, values that are important to tankery."

Shiho passively listened to Kinue, seeing her as little more than the commander of the defeated flag tank. If she was truly devoted to her sister, she should have fought alongside her from the beginning. And her devotion meant little if she did not have the talent to achieve results through it.

But one thing stuck out in Shiho's mind.

"Soccer?" Shiho said. "That sounds familiar. A few of my classmates took an interest in that as well. But by that time, I was already firmly on the path toward becoming a Nishizumi heiress, and as such, rejected them along with all other distractions."

32 years ago

As class ended for the day Shiho, wearing the blue sailor fuku with a red neckerchief that was the school's uniform, packed up her belongings after class. Her school was a private all-girls school some distance from the one where Miho and Maho attended years later; by the time Shiho had children of her own, her alma mater had closed down.

Some of Shiho's classmates were milling around the classmates, talking with each other, but Shiho saw no need to do this. Her mother expected her home promptly after school, and she had a tight schedule, so she believed she had no time to waste.

"Nishizumi-san," one of her classmates said, while approaching her with a taller girl who had short hair, "some friends and I are going to play a game of soccer this afternoon. Would you like to come?"

Shiho pondered the question for a moment. She had heard of soccer before, however much her classmates thought she lived under a rock, and understood how to play it. What she did not understand, however, was why her classmates would take part in it. They clearly were not taking it seriously enough to even have a chance of becoming professionals, so what point was there in doing it halfheartedly?

"I'm sorry," Shiho said. "My mother wants me to return home as soon as possible so I can study tankery."

The girl nodded to accept Shiho's answer, albeit disappointed to be turned down.

"See? I told you Nishizumi wouldn't accept," the taller girl whispered into the first girl's ear, albeit just loudly enough to be audible to Shiho. "She's stuck up and sees all of us as inferior. She's obsessed with that stupid tankery her family teaches, and thinks soccer- and those of us who play it- are beneath her."

The first girl fixed the second one with a disapproving glare, but said nothing in response. Shiho briefly considered asking why, but believed she would not get a fully honest answer.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Nishizumi-san," the first girl said. "My offer is still open, though."

As Shiho said goodbye to the two girls, she was uncertain how she had gotten such a reputation around school; it was a harsh but not entirely inaccurate representation of her thoughts, but if they did not know what she was thinking, how did they reach this conclusion? Was it because of Shiho's habit of refusing to socialize with others? Was it because of the Nishizumi family's reputation? Was it because they hated tankery?

In any case, Shiho concluded that people like those two girls would not be worth her time if they regarded her family's trade in such a way, showing how little they had in common. Shiho regarded tankery and her parent's style as important parts of her identity, and believed that she would find it nearly impossible to get along with those who could not accept both of them.

But two disquieting thoughts went through Shiho's mind. Who would be worth her time? And just why was she trying so hard?

Shiho returned home to the Nishizumi household, which, not unlike the Nishizumi style, largely did not change in the decades between Shiho's childhood and her daughters'.

"Welcome home, Shiho-sama," Fumi, a maid for the Nishizumi household said. "How was school today?"

"It went well, thank you," Shiho said. Shiho, knowing that the maids were discouraged from fraternizing with her, saw the question for what it was- a simple gesture of politeness- and had responded in kind.

"Very good," Fumi said. "The mistress is expecting you in the living room."

Fumi bowed and showed Shiho to the living room.

Fumi, like the rest of the maids, was largely not to speak to Shiho unless spoken to, or show Shiho anything less than the utmost respect- although since Shiho was not yet head of the family, Fumi was to call her by her name and "-sama", rather than "Mistress." Shiho suspected that Fumi, despite seeing her every day, did not know much about her apart from her being her mistress' daughter, her approximate age, and her studying to succeed her mother's headship of the tankery school; Shiho did not know anything about Fumi apart from her occupation and. the fact that she was apparently once one of her mother's students, something her mother had mentioned in passing.

Shiho and Fumi had little in common apart from tankery, and were both brought together by their common connection, albeit different in nature, with a single person. If Fumi's employment was terminated, or Shiho was disowned for failing to become a proper heiress- something she was fully aware was possible even back then, and strove hard to avoid- they would no longer have any reason to talk with each other.

Shiho, as young as she was, was beginning to realize what her life would be like as an adult. Most of those she associated with would be those who served under her or otherwise had business with her. They would often have an ulterior motive for currying her favor, or see her as someone to whom they were subservient. And those who did not share her goals would likely regard her as obsessed, or not worth dealing with, like her classmates had.

So was Shiho really so different from others? Did she necessarily have to be? She decided to talk to her mother to find out.

After one of Shiho's evening lessons, in which she was relentlessly drilled by her mother, Nishizumi Hotaru, Shiho asked about her peers.

"Mother?" Shiho said. "I've noticed that few people my age seem even remotely interested in tankery. Do so few people have our level of commitment to tankery?"

"Yes, Shiho, and it's their loss," Hotaru said coldly. "Success in your endeavors takes a combination of talent and determination. There are those who will not succeed no matter how hard they try, but there are also others who waste their talent by not giving their all. You have talent, Shiho, so I will not settle for anything less than perfection from you."

Shiho paused to consider her mother's words. Was it really worth limiting herself to be able to relate to other people if they had this level of resolve? Would they be worth relating to, enough so that it would justify her incurring her mother's wrath?

"Then that is what I will do, Mother," Shiho said, trying to convince herself as well as her mother. The latter's approval of her was, as always, of paramount importance, given her mother was the sole person whose opinion of her had practical ramifications for her.

Shiho's mother was still dispassionate; Shiho realized that her mother noticed the less than absolute conviction in her voice, and thus, the fact that she was not fully committed. But Hotaru chose not to rebuke Shiho, but tell her what she was meant to do.

"One day, you will understand," Shiho's mother said. "You are still young, so it is likely too much to expect you to understand the Nishizumi School's ideals, or the importance of upholding tradition. But until you do, I expect you to obey me, and dedicate yourself to becoming as good at tankery as possible, so that when you are old enough, you are prepared for your responsibilities. Do you understand me?"

Shiho knew that there was only one acceptable answer to the question.

"Yes, Mother," she said.

Evidently satisfied with her daughter's response, Shiho's mother nodded.

"Good," Shiho's mother said. "You have already shown commitment far above that of your peers- now show me that your results will similarly exceed theirs."

Shiho's mother then left her daughter to study alone. Hotaru had told Shiho to develop good study habits on her own, so that she could do well when her mother was no longer around to supervise her.

Shiho walked back into her room, sat down and began poring over a text related to operating a tank that was significantly above most elementary schoolers' reading level. There were few her age who could perform on her level.

Perhaps it was time for Shiho to stop reducing herself to the lowest common denominator. She was set apart from her peers, and that was a good thing. The day would come when she would truly understand it, but even now, she saw the difference between her and the others, and some of the results of her superior effort and greater devotion.

Present day

"My mother was a stern woman, who rarely gave praise, but I knew that she approved of my choices, and my results," Shiho said. "If she hadn't, I would have known; she made it clear that failure and halfhearted resolve would not be tolerated."

Miho was temporarily at a loss for words. She'd heard stories about her mother's childhood, but never this part. While it was difficult for her to openly question her mother, she knew now was the time to do so, and believed even her mother would not object to the question she had.

"I'm… honestly surprised to hear this, Mother," Miho said, "about how you decided to approach Grandmother and ask about your peers."

"Which part, Miho?" Shiho said. "That I was isolated from my peers in school as a result of my tankery training? Or that I had doubts about this?"

"The latter," Miho said. "When I was young, I also felt lonely at school, unable to make friends without common interests with my classmates. I suppose the same was true for you and my sister. But I never expected that you even thought about quitting, Mother, since you always seemed so… sure… about everything."

Miho wondered if any of her mother's schoolmates were like Hitomi, Chihiro and Emi, the first friends Miho had made as a result of tankery. Was it possible that Shiho had closed herself off from the possibility of such friendships? Miho was well aware that her friends would likely not have befriended her if she had uncritically accepted the Nishizumi style, which was one of her strongest reasons for rejecting it.

And Miho knew that her mother, who believed strongly in the value of sacrifice, would most likely never compromise her principles to accommodate those who did not go as far as she did, seeing it as a small sacrifice.

"That was because back then, I did not understand the importance of adhering to tradition," Shiho said. "I realized when I became a parent that it would be too much for you or Maho to understand that as small children, and I could only hope that you would obey, trusting me, as I trusted my mother, to raise you in the way I knew to be best for you and our school."

Masae frowned. She was starting to understand more about Shiho's motivations. But while it was refreshing to hear more about Shiho's personal vulnerability, she was disappointed to hear Shiho dismiss her inability to uncritically accept tradition as weakness.

"It seems that, yet again, you do not agree with me, Instructor Atago," Shiho said, reading Masae's expression.

"No, Instructor Nishizumi," Masae said. "Tradition is important in some ways, but there are times when people and society must adapt to the changing times. Think back to a time when people did not foresee the creation of tanks, or seriously consider the idea of women like us having important positions in teaching."

"Perhaps not," Shiho said. "But surely there are many things about the present that you would like to keep as they are, Instructor Atago? Traditionalists believe that the past practices have endured because they work, and while the wiser ones among them realize that things will change in the future, they do not wish to see us go down paths that lead to unpleasant change or the sacrifice of the values they hold dear. And even those who recognize the value of change have been influenced by the past, even if they don't admit it or aren't fully aware of it."

"That's true," Masae said. "My parents were a large influence on me, going down different paths from their parents, but still learning from them and resolving to raise my sister and I as well as they could."

Shiho nodded. Masae had asked to meet her to learn about her, but perhaps Shiho could also learn a few things about her, her style of parenting and her teaching methods.

"Very well, Instructor Atago," Shiho said, "I would like to hear about your parents."

Author's Notes

Thank you for the reviews, favorites and follows.

EXpertUS: The Achiga-hen series was intended to show us the other side of the tournament, which might have been interesting to see in Girls und Panzer. As for Shinohayu, nothing story-changing has been revealed so far yet, but it's still interesting to see the pros as small children, and the format for it partly inspired the format for this fic.

Shiho does tend to be fairly unapologetic about her parenting styles, but she sincerely believes that what she does is in her children's best interests, as much as her upbringing was beneficial for her own.

Character Analysis: Hotaru Nishizumi

Hotaru is in many ways like Shiho, in large part because Shiho chose to emulate her mother. She has strict expectations for her children, primarily judges them by their ability to succeed her, and is intolerant of failure, even if her daughter, by meeting her standards, did not test how far she would go for the sake of corrective action. Like Shiho, Hotaru focuses mainly on the good of the Nishizumi school, and thinks of considering a single individual's welfare above the goal of the family unit as foolishly sentimental at best. Hotaru has dedicated her life to tankery, and will not stand for anything less from her daughter and granddaughters. As a result of that, Miho and Maho saw little of her, and have few memories of her.

Of course, Hotaru is only similar to Shiho to a point. She's slightly more "hands-off" than Shiho is; while she expects Shiho to achieve perfection, much like Shiho does for Maho, Hotaru is more willing to sit back and leave Shiho to her own devices, trusting her to do what she has been taught and to meet her expectations. This is partly because Hotaru does not have a daughter who defies her expectations, and partly because she (correctly) believes in Shiho's ability to follow her orders and live up to her standards.

How would Hotaru deal with Miho? Shiho cannot say for certain apart from her justified belief that Hotaru would not approve of her granddaughter's deviations from the style but knows of her mother's harsh standards, refusal to accept anything less than the best and devotion to the Nishizumi tradition, and so chooses to follow her mother's example, while hoping that Maho will one day do the same. In that sense, while Hotaru may have passed on, her legacy can be seen in the Nishizumi family's present situation.