I felt bad for Ryan all of a sudden. I was about to my first period when anna walked up and stopped me.
"Hey Rose, again I'm sorry but there's something last minute I want to talk to you about, we still have a few minutes before classes start." She put her hand on my wrist going to lead me away from the classroom door. I silently followed her still trying to wake my brain up out of a daze.
"I know you've had to have seen the party invitaion that we're throwing at my place tonight. Well Me and Ryan were thinking about having us girls do a dance at the party and then you and him, it would make the party perfect. And we're hoping maybe that some more kids from around campus will join the dance team. So Ryan was thinking that at the party you and him could perform the dance you did in dance practice the other day. And we wanted to pull you from your last to periods later today to go over the dance we want to perform."
I nodded at her in shock, and I had the worst feeling in the pit of my stomach that 'the shit was about to hit the fan', I watched her get excited and run off down the hall in a state that could only be dread.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo OoOoOoOoOoOo
During the lunch period, I wanted to be away from everyone to think. I walked out of the building, leaving all my stuff behind in my locker; and walked over to the park that I go to alot here of late. The closer I got to the park, the slower I started walking; putting my hands in the pocket of my blazer and looking down at the ground. I walked over and sat down on the swing with my hands still in my pockets and still staring down at the ground; I started pushing the swing back and forth a little bit with my legs. I felt so confused, my thoughts kept going around in circles, and I couldn't seem to seperate my thoughts and feelings and I knew that I like them both, but the way I like them are so different from each other. Dimitri is like fire to me, burning me up from the inside out, until I feel like I can't breathe when I'm aroudn him.
But with Ryan, he's like water, calm and soothing, I place to come to and refresh your breathe. He's like a pillar of strength to those he cares about. I didn't know what to do, I felt lost...
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo OoOoOoOoOoOoOo
I went through the day processing and absorbing everything that was going on around me, and being thrown at me; but I still felt like I was just going through the motions, 'Is this shock' I thought so many times. A shock of realization that I would have to choose one of them, and I could feel that in my gut. But how do you go about picking between two people that complete you in two different ways? I continued on like this all the way through practing my routine with the girls' through getting ready to the party. And i didn't really seem to snap out of my mood until I found myself standing infront of Dimitri to the front door of Ryan and Annas' house. I was standing a few steps down from him, wearing a black spagetti strap shirt with a long black fishnet shirt over top, a blue jean miniskirt with black cropped leggings on underneith; and black crop wedges that were made to be a more chic version of motorcycle boots. I had my hair completely down, and my make-up was up to look like a model right out of victorias secret. Apparently my body is more fashion forward with its movements then I would have thought.
I look up to see Dimitris eyes raking over me and taking me all in. I could see the fire burning behind his eyes and I knew that my eyes held the same fire when I looked at him.
He was leaning back against the wall with his hand shoved into a pair of faded, and fitted jeans with holes and rips placed strategically here and there, with a fitted black tee that showede just enough of his muscles through it, and a pair of black, white, and yellow Osiris shoes. And his hair pulled back into a bun with strand of hair coming out. It's a look that I would never have pictured on Dimitri; I know that he had to of borrowed someone else clothes; because there is no way he would buy an outfit like this. But the sight of him like that, was lighting something on fire inside of me. I don't know how long we stood there just staring at each other before I finally pushed of the wall with his hands still in his pockets and walked the few steps down to me and bent down til we were eye level, pulling his hands out of his pockets and placing them gently on eithere side of my face and staring into my eyes, like he could see my soul. He leaned in and whispered something in Russian to me. I didn't have time to ask what he had just said, because his lips locked with mine and everything seemed to just disappear and I felt so incredabily hot. He broke the kiss and without saying a word grabbed my hand and led me inside the house, and as soon as I passed the threshhold of the door I felt the pit of my stomach drop.
