Harue 1: An Idyllic Time
The rest of the table was slightly caught off guard by Harue's blunt question of whether they thought she had wasted their childhood.
Masae, already seeing a little of her younger sister, her younger daughter and her niece in Harue, was the first to respond.
"Not at all, Akado-sensei," Masae said. "I'm a relative late bloomer compared to the others at the table, having started tankery in middle school. The only one in my family who got involved in tankery from a young age was my eldest daughter Hiroe, and she did so by personal choice."
"I see what you mean, Instructor Atago," Harue said. "Of course, my middle school had no tankery program, so I only was able to get started in high school."
"What were you doing until then, Akado-san?" Ami said.
"What might be expected of an 'ordinary' kid," Harue said with a shrug. "Going to school, making friends, dabbling in various hobbies and clubs, that sort of thing. It was an idyllic time, when I didn't have to worry about too much, or seriously consider my aspirations for the future."
"Some say that's not necessarily a bad thing," Masae said.
"Back then, everything I did outside of school and my other obligations was more or less casual," Harue said. "I played soccer with my friends without thinking about getting onto a school team, much less a professional one. I wanted to be a news anchor for the sake of getting on TV, and my best friend, Atarashi Nozomi, fantasized about becoming an astronaut to go into space. And I think it was when we were talking about our fantasies that we first saw a televised tankery match."
18 years ago.
Harue and Nozomi, both ten years old, walked home from school in the town of Achiga, passing by the shops in the town. They glanced inside an electronics store, and saw one of the TVs on display playing a broadcast of a tankery match. The sound of the main gun firing drew their attention, and they saw a fierce battle raging across a field.
Harue and Nozomi stopped in their tracks, transfixed by an innocent fascination with what was transpiring on the screen. Were they actually watching a tank battle? It seemed so exciting to them.
"So this is tankery?" Harue said, having heard of it but never seen a match herself.
"Yes, it is," a woman working at the store said as she swept the outside porch. "It's a match between Black Forest and St. Gloriana for the championship."
"It looks really exciting," Harue said, speaking from the naive excitement and wonder a young child experiences when seeing something new and interesting. "I'd like to get involved somehow."
The woman smiled, a gesture that Harue interpreted as an appreciation for Harue's eagerness, even if she realized that she was nowhere near being able to act on her desires..
"You'll be able to do so someday, young lady," the woman said. "I got started in tankery in high school, and served as a radio operator for Blue Division. We didn't do all that well, but I had fun, and developed an appreciation for working with communication technology."
Harue's jaw dropped slightly, as she tried to count out the grades she had yet to complete.
"I'm in fifth grade, so..." Harue began, holding out her hands and counting on her fingers.
"Five years, including the one you're on, unless you get into a good middle school," the woman said. "Hang in there, and know that you're not the only one eagerly waiting, nor is tankery the only thing kids your age look forward to. There's plenty of good stuff- as well as hard stuff- that will come when you're older, so just enjoy your childhood for now."
Harue and Nozomi waved goodbye to the woman, and started walking away.
"To think I'd never heard of tankery being done by kids- that is, older kids- before..." Harue said. "I'd always assumed it was something grown-ups did."
"Well, it's not for our age group," Nozomi said. "I suspect the adults didn't tell us because they didn't want us to get ahead of ourselves, and long for something we can't have, on top of the many things off limits to children."
"I suppose you're right," Harue said. "I see Dad leave for work every day, but the only things I know about his job are the name of the company, the fact that it's an office job, and that he wears a suit and tie to work every day. I have no idea whether it's something I'll even want to do, although considering that Dad apparently complains about the job a lot, I probably won't want a job like his."
Harue paused, letting her words sink in.
"And yet, I know that someday, unless I get married and become a homemaker like Mom, I'll have to get a job too, even if it's very different from Dad's," Harue said. "So I don't suppose there's any harm in thinking ahead and looking to the future."
"I suppose not," Nozomi said. "But, like that woman said, you shouldn't lose sight of the present, either."
The two remained silent as they continued on home, their minds returning to their present concerns. Tankery was one of those things they had to look forward to in the future, so now they had to work on getting there.
Present day
"When you're young, you have a different sense of time," Harue said. "As an eight-year-old, when going to middle school seems distant, it's practically impossible to think about what you will do when you become an adult. And I don't think that I ever imagined myself doing this."
Harue paused for a moment, and wondered what her younger self would think if she saw her now. Perhaps the only part that the younger Harue a
"That's natural," Masae said. "My mother once told me that you should take things at their own pace and not get ahead of yourself. The advice you got from that woman you met and your friend is highly reminiscent of that."
"You may be right, Instructor Atago," Harue said. "But what I realized first was that neither those competing with me for a spot on a tankery team, nor those who would be my school's opponents, would wait for me."
13 years ago
Harue, now in her final year of middle school, took a tour of Black Forest, along with Nozomi and several other prospective students. Each of the students wore their school's respective summer uniform, which, for Harue and Nozomi, was a light blue sailor fuku with a red neckerchief. Without a tankery team or school theme, their school had simply gone with a standard Japanese school uniform, different enough from other middle schoolers that you could identify a student with a glance, but not tied with any national theme. Several others in the crowd had various themed school uniforms, indicating that they were from schools with somewhat noteworthy tankery teams.
The tour approached the Black Forest tankery team's table. The person at the table, Yukimura Mashiro, a first-year with short white hair who was a vice-captain for Black Forest, outlined Black Forest's history and prestige as a tankery team.
"Does anyone have any questions?" Mashiro said. Harue raised her hand, and Mashiro turned to her, noticing her hand and then her name tag. "Akado-san?"
"What sort of people are you looking for in your tankery team?" Harue said. She found the description of the tankery team slightly intimidating, but having some familiar with athletic programs, knew that not everyone could make the team, even in one as large as a tankery team.
"Only the best," Mashiro said. "What sort of prior experience do you have, Akado-san?"
"Prior experience?" Harue said, caught off guard by the question. She had not expected being required to have experience already, or that the person who answered questions would ask her one in return. "Um, none. I'm interested because tankery sounds like it would be fun."
Reactions varied among the group. Some snickered derisively at Harue's apparent ignorance. Others sighed, despairing at their chances of getting a spot on the team.
"Then you should look elsewhere, Akado-san," Mashiro said. "At Black Forest, we do not coddle those who are not both willing and able to do what is necessary. It is our duty to come prepared, and give our all for the team. If you can do that, you will earn the honor of being part of the champion team. If you cannot, then it would be better for both of us if you do not apply. I do, however, wish you the best of luck in finding a tankery team better suited to you."
Mashiro's words stung Harue. She knew that teams required sacrifice and selflessness, but wondered if this was going to another level entirely, one that a person like her could not hope to reach. Had Mashiro forgotten what it was like to be a newcomer who had yet to prove herself?
Harue believed that there was little point in debating with this more experienced student, lest she embarrass herself further, and silently shrunk back into the crowd of students, letting another one ask her question about what position they needed most. But she hoped a day would come when she proved that tankey was accessible to anyone with the right determination.
But as Harue looked over her shoulder, she caught the faintest glimpse of a somber and resigned expression on Mashiro's face. Unable to understand why Mashiro would look on her in such a way, Harue turned away and never looked back.
Present day
"Basically, I came away from that encounter seeing just how seriously people took tankery," Harue said. "I could understand her wanting strong players for her team, but realized that the team was no place for enthusiastic newbies like Nozomi and I. Where, then, could we go?"
The rest of the table remained silent for a moment, knowing what answer Harue had eventually found, but understanding what she had felt back then.
"I'm sorry your first encounter from the Black Forest tankery team was with Yukimura-senpai, Akado-san," Kikuyo said. "She, our senpai in both Black Forest and the Nishizumi school, as well as our commander in the former, tried her best to have a perfect tankery team, and had high standards for us. Unfortunately, that led her to dismiss an enthusiastic beginner as being naive and useless to the team, so it's understandable that from your perspective, she would come off as an overly harsh perfectionist."
"Not everyone at Black Forest is like that, of course," Ami said. "Some of the tankery students are fairly affable, if more determined and competitive than most. You probably wouldn't have guessed Kikuyo was a student unless I told you."
"No, I don't think I would have," Harue said.
Takako frowned, understanding Kikuyo and Ami's condolences, but believing that they were not what Harue needed to hear.
"Commander Yukimura was harsh, but she had a point," Takako said. "It was better, for both you and Black Forest, that you learned about our expectations before you applied, rather than when you tried to join the team. If nothing else, I'm up front about what I expect out of Black Forest's tankers, so they only get involved if they're willing to go as far as we need them to go."
Harue simply nodded. The more she heard about Black Forest, the more certain she was that her decision not to attend was a good one.
"You may be right, Coach Kubo," Masae said. "But as someone who spent almost two years at Black Forest, I believe that my doing so helped inform my perspectives about tankery. Perhaps Akado-sensei might have learned lessons of her own had she attended there."
"Perhaps," Takako said, "but Commander Yukimura knew that we don't exist so that tankers can have a journey of self-discovery as part of our team. Our tankers should come here knowing that they're ready to give their all to the team, or look elsewhere."
Masae nodded.
"I will concede that tankers should, at the very least, be committed," Masae said. "And I am also forthcoming about what I expect from others. But what about someone who tries hard but doesn't meet your expectations?"
"Commander Yukimura knew of someone like that," Takako said, "namely, her older sister, who is five years her senior. The elder Yukimura was not nearly as skilled at tankery, and had flunked out of the Nishizumi School. Commander Yukimura spoke fondly of her sister, making rare shows of warmth when she did, but concluded that she was not cut out for tankery."
Takako finished her story about Mashiro and her sister with a resigned tone, wishing that the outcome could have been different.
"Well, I don't really know Yukimura-san or her sister, Coach Kubo..." Harue said.
"Neither do I," Takako interjected. "She was my commander, but revealed little about her personal life, save to make a point."
"But I do have to wonder," Harue continued. "How would she have fared with a more welcoming environment?"
Takako shrugged. After a pause, Harue decided to give her answer.
"I know that if I'd continued to face rejection like I did at Black Forest, I would have become disillusioned with tankery- well, sooner and more permanently," Harue said. "But Saunders was my next stop, and my reception was much warmer there."
13 years ago
While touring Saunders, Harue and Nozomi approached the desk for the tankery team. The girl wore a navy skirt and blazer, a white dress shirt and a red necktie, an older version of Saunders' uniform. The uniform, like those of other themed schools, was, in addition to keeping with the theme of the ship, meant to give students a neat and professional appearance.
The uniform reminded Harue of her father's business suits, as well as the time he had taught her how to tie a necktie, saying that there were times when she would be expected to wear one. For a moment, she wondered if the student's demeanor, matching her appearance, was polite yet formal and distant. That impression faded the moment the student greeted her.
"Hi, and welcome to the information desk for the Saunders tankery team!" the girl at the desk said, as the students approached the table.
"Are you looking for new members?" Harue said to the student.
"OH, YES!" the student said in English."
"Even if they don't have experience?" Harue said.
"Of course," the student said. "We need warm bodies to crew our tanks, and lots of them. Experience isn't really a problem, since most of us are fairly new. And it's always fun having new people around."
"That's good to hear," Nozomi said.
"If I may ask, why do you need so many people?" Harue said.
"We're a relatively small and up and coming team," the student said. "We're not likely to win, but we find tankery fun so far. Not winning tournaments isn't a problem for you, right?"
"No, it's not," Harue and Nozomi said together.
"Good," the student said. "Check us out if you ever decide to come to Saunders."
Harue and Ami moved on, but then decided to confer with each other.
"So what do you think?" Nozomi said to Harue.
"I've got a few others my parents want me to look at," Harue said, "and it ultimately comes down to which ones admit us. But I think this one's the most promising so far. They look like they actually want us, and even if some say that 'beggars can't be choosers,' they're willing to help."
"That's good," Nozomi said. "I'm not in this to win championships or become famous, but to do it along with my friends. The rest of Saunders sounds like a good school, so I hope to go there. Are you interested?"
Harue smiled and nodded, agreeing with her friend. The fact that Nozomi seemed willing to go to there and get started in tankery together with her was all the more reason to choose Saunders.
Harue and Nozomi left Saunders in a good mood, making certain that they filled out the feedback form with positive comments about the tour guide. Not only had they found a promising place to go to school, but for the first time, they saw tankery as having an open door and inviting them in.
Present day
"A part of me wondered at the time whether the friendly invitation was because Saunders needed recruits and wanted to put its best foot forward, since they couldn't afford to be choosy," Harue said. "But Saunders has no shortage of them now, and still continues reaching out."
"It's ultimately common sense," Masae said. "Every year, some of your students graduate or otherwise leave the school, so you're constantly seeking new ones. I've had to put my school's name out there a great deal in the early years, and even now, part of my reason coming to this convention is to get the word out."
"Yes, I suppose that's true," Harue said.
"Of course, even if there are benefits to it, it's still a good policy," Masae said. "Saunders has always been one of my favorite tankery schools, apart from Pravda and Oarai."
"I did visit and consider Pravda, too," Harue said. "But ultimately, I had a better impression of Saunders, since they were willing to welcome newcomers."
Masae could not help but wonder how Oarai would do in the future. Several members of its team had graduated, and after the next academic year, they would need to replace many more members, including their commander. How well they did would determine their performance over the long term, or if there would even be a long term. Perhaps how Saunders had changed in the past might give some idea as to how Oarai would fare in the future.
"It certainly has come a long way since then," Masae said. "It's gone from a school that was desperate for tankers, to one that has more than enough for three teams."
"And yet, it hasn't forgotten where it came from," Harue said. "Granted, only a small portion of the people on the team qualify for the main team, but the team, by and large, has fun doing tankery."
Ami nodded.
"I am interested, though," Harue said, "in hearing why people would be drawn to a school like Black Forest."
"Then I'll tell you why," Ami said. "There are many who fall short of Black Forest's standards, and many who choose to look elsewhere. But there are also many, like my friends and I, who feel right at home there."
Author's notes
Saunders from Harue's time could be described as a well-funded underdog, a bit like Tsuruga in Saki. I suspect that's what they were like in the beginning, as they were not always a well-established team.
Incidentally, on my profile, there's a poll for which team leader you like the most. I'm interested in seeing which ones prove the most popular, especially if ones that I don't expect to be popular end up getting support.