Lucy POV

I watched Laxus sleep with his head leaning against the compartment wall. He looked so peaceful; making me glad he didn't know the whole truth. Watching Laxus at peace like this stirred up some of my own demons.

Starting with my memories.

It started three years ago, in my dreams. I was young, only eight or so years old. It was two years before my mother dies. She had taken me out to the forest, telling me to keep quiet as we approached this massive black rock, or so I had thought. It moved as though it could sense me and my mother's presence.

"Human, you are the one with the magic of old, are you not?"

I let out a yelp of fear. "Mommy!"

"Shh, baby, it's okay."My mother quieted me down. "Yes, I'm the one with the old magic."

The boulder shifted to reveal a mighty dragon with vibrant blue streaks across its back, face, and wings. "This child… She contains the magic as well."

"Yes." My mother confirmed. "I'd like it if you make her a dragon slayer. She's mastered the basics of Celestial Magic, and knows minor healing magic. The problem is that she has her grandfather in her, Acnologia."

The dragon narrowed his eyes at my mother. "How is it you know my name, Human?"

"Because my father is your king turned human. He is Zachariah, Dragon of the Stars."

The dragon seemed to smile in reminiscence. "Ah, that is why the magic is strong with you."

"And you know of his wishes." My mother said sadly.

"Indeed I do, but you do realize you are too old to receive those gifts."

"Yes, I'm aware, but my daughter is young enough." My mother chocked back the tears in her eyes. "Please fulfill his wishes and return my child to me."

"Mr. Dragon?" I asked. "Are you going to eat me and Mommy?"

The dragon let out a mighty roar of laughter. "No, little princess turned human. You are coming with me." The dragon scooped me up and placed me onto his back.

"Lucy, honey, Mommy loves you very much, but you need to go with your uncle for now. He'll take very good care of you. I promise. You'll see me and Papa very soon."

I screamed for my mother as the dragon took off, carrying me away from my family.

"LUCY!"

I bolted upright, looking around for any sign of danger, just to find Natsu, Gray, and Erza sitting in front of me. Erza quickly moved to sit next to me.

"What's wrong with you, Lucy?" Gray asked quietly, in is normal calm voice.

I shook my head. "It's nothing. Where's Laxus?" I asked, taking notice of my dragon slayer's absence.

"He went to go retrieve Wendy." Erza said sternly. "But screaming out for your mother is not nothing, Lucy."

"I said it was nothing, Erza, so it was nothing. I'm fine so quit asking."

Laxus slammed open the compartment door and looked me dead in the eyes. "Don't you lie to me, Lucy. Something's wrong with you and you're going to tell me what. You have got to stop keeping everything to yourself. We're a team, so we do everything together. Whatever it is we can handle it, Luce."

"Well this is something you couldn't handle even if you wished for it on a thousand falling stars." I said darkly. I stood and pushed passed all of them and moved to the end of the train. Walking outside, I leaned onto the railing. My hair whipped around me as I looked at the scenery we past at fast speeds. We looked to be just leaving the town where Natsu, Gray, Erza, Romeo, and Juvia were set to be.

There was a hand on my shoulder as stared off into the now distant town.

"Mavis, I told you I can handle it. They can't."

The not-so-young First Master giggled. "You're right about that, Fourth, but you know what they can do to you. I would like to talk you out of fighting, but we both know that won't happen."

I laughed darkly. "You can bet on that."

Mavis turned me to look at her. "Seriously, Fourth, you need to consider the high chance of Zeref using that magic. You saw where it got Acnologia shortly after your mother died."

I turned away from her. "I'm in control now, Mavis. I'm not just here to protect my family. I'm here to get revenge for everyone that's suffered by his hand; Gray, Sting and Rogue, Rufus, even Minerva, and most of all, my grandfather."

"Well, I know your grandmother is not happy with the way you're going about this, Lucy."

"I'm aware. You've expressed your distaste quite fluently."

"You bear the mark of my guild and you have dragon blood running through your veins. What does that tell you, Lucy?"

I looked at my mother's mother. "It tells me that I'm weak."

Mavis smiled. "Yes, it does, as it should, but it should also tell you that you're strong enough to hold Fairy Tail's name high enough for the world to see."

"Then the name must be light, Mavis."

"No, it's quite the contrary. It's rather heavy, but that's okay, because you're not the only one carrying it." We both whipped around to see Makarov walking up to us, taking his place between us. "Lucy, I take it you have something you wish for no one to find because you we will judge you for it. However, this is not the case. I know your secrets, as well as everyone else's, and I will not share them, but if you put us all at risk, you shouldn't just bear the knowledge of that alone."

"I'm Acnologia's dragon slayer, Master. What do you make of that? They are going to crucify me! I didn't ask to be a dragon slayer. I didn't ask for this burden! I just wanted to follow after my mother's dreams for me. I wanted to make her happy by becoming the best mage I could be. I didn't ask to be this… this monster!" I looked Makarov in the eyes. "You wanna know how I know where Zeref is? It's because I can hear him in my head. I can hear him beckoning me to his side, Master. He's calling me to go to the dark side and do you know how hard it is to resist? Do you understand that I've been battling his calls for four years now?"

Lucy, you are far from a monster. You just need-"

"Shut up!" I yelled. "You don't understand! Four years of hearing that man bark his orders, whisper his plans, and talk about his dreams for me has started to tear me apart. Sometimes, I can't even look my boys in the eye without wanting to scream at them to get away from me. He's been getting louder, Master. Much. Louder. It's getting harder to ignore him and he knows it." I stood on the railing. "I've thought about suicide, Master, but I just couldn't do it. I'd save so many people if I died, but I'm too selfish for that."

"Lucy, you need to stop this. You're no monster." Mavis said quietly. "Come back inside, when you're ready. We have much to discuss."

Oh, sweet Lucy. Still fighting for the light, I see?

"Shut up and get out of my head!" I yelled to the emptiness around me.

I gladly will, but you must hold your end of the deal as well, Lucy.

"Go to hell, you son of bitch. I'll keep fighting you until the day I die." I snapped.

Tis a shame. Acnologia was looking forward to see his precious dragon slayer again. Perhaps I should put him out of his misery.

"What are you going to do to him?!" I yelled frantically.

I'm going to have him kill your friends and this time, Mavis won't be able to save them. With them dead, you have nothing holding you back from reaching your full potential. You'll be what you were meant to be. A monster of the highest caliber.

I took a deep breath and exhaled. "Fine, Zeref. You win. But you keep my family out of this."

Oh? Is that so? Self sacrifice is the way if your family, isn't it? I can't say I'm much of the bargaining type, Lucy, but I know an unfair deal when I hear one. Here's the deal, Lucy, you come and find me, lead your family to me, and I'll make them all monsters. All of them and you can be with your precious little fairies and I'll have you. Sounds like a good deal, doesn't it?

"No way in hell. We're fighting you as we are! We're fairies and your demons!"

Ah, but the thing about fairies is that they walk in the light, but you, you walk in the darkness. You have since the day you were born.

I clutched my head in my hands. "Get the hell out of my head, you son of a bitch!"

All I heard was silence and my heavy breathing. Then the door behind me opened, revealing a tiny Wendy.

"Lucy-san? Dinner's ready and everyone is waiting on you."

I turned around and gave her a smile. "Alright, let's go, Wendy, before Natsu and Sting eat everything."

She gave me a long look before returning my smile and nodding. "Okay."

I knew what I had to do and no one was going to be happy with it.

Zeref, since I know you're listening. You can have me on your side, on the condition that I can eat this last meal with my family without you and I can say my final goodbyes.

Granted.

That was intense, eh? So I know this is a little out of schedule for me, but I had some serious inspiration and I think I'm going to finish this story up before I update any others with the exception of one-shots and the one (maybe two) shot squeal to Starstruck.

So, with this story now my primary focus that means my other stories are on hiatus. I dunno how long that'll be though. So sorry.

Also, we're close to two hundred reviews and I think we should do something special to celebrate, so I'm going to have a poll on my profile with the options of what kind of one -shot I'll write.

Drop me a review okay?

-Jay