* Wanted to update quickly because I'm excited about what's coming. Hope you guys enjoy! *
After only securing three hours of sleep, Olivia was woken up by the sound of her alarm blaring. She rolled over and hit the snooze button, not wanting to ever leave the comfort of her bed. But she knew that it wasn't an option, so instead she heaved herself out of bed and headed for the bathroom.
Nearly an hour after getting out of bed, Liv emerged from her bathroom, ready and needing to get dressed. She put on a simple black dress, grey blazer, and a pair of heels. She wasn't very fond of having to wear a dress, but most of her clothes didn't fit well anymore and she couldn't show up in yoga pants and over-sized sweater, as much as she wanted to.
Dressed and ready, pouring herself a cup of coffee, Olivia's quiet morning was interrupted, much like the night before, with a knock at the door. However, she was expecting it this time.
Liv waddled to the door and opened it to find the older gentleman standing there. "Let me get my purse and we can leave."
Donald Cragen nodded at his former sergeant and followed her into the apartment, closing the door behind him.
Cragen had seen Liv a few times since that day at Brian's funeral and when they had decided on a trial date he knew he would need to be there for that. She was doing her best to hide her worry and sadness, but the captain had known her too long to not be able to see that she needed some extra support. And he would do anything for the women he had known for over a decade. He was going to sit with her and be there for her in that courtroom.
Olivia appeared again, this time with a jacket and her purse slung over her right shoulder. "Alright, I guess we have to go."
"Yeah we do." Cragen ushered her out the door and walked out behind her. "How are you feeling?"
"I've been worse, but I've certainly been better." The typical evasive answer he had expected.
Once they got to the garage, Olivia handed Cragen the keys and got into the passenger seat. The man quickly started the car and pulled out of the garage, into the street. The ride was basically silent besides a few sentences, but Cragen felt Liv's tension and knew not to push her.
That same tension was what kept everyone silent in the courtroom right before Olivia testified. Just as Cragen had, the whole squad could cut the tension they were feeling with a knife. But they understood why Olivia was in the place she was and they certainly were going to be there for her whether she expressed her want for them or not.
Moments later Liv was sworn in and sitting on the witness stand, a whole room of familiar and unfamiliar eyes staring at her.
"Thank you for being her today Sergeant Benson, I know this is difficult." Barba started his questioning. "Can you first tell me how long you've been on the job, now?"
The questioning was at first simple. She told him how long she had worked as a cop and at SVU, how many cases she had handled, when the case of Jack Sutton had ended up at sex crimes, and how long they worked the case, the background information. Then, it became much tougher.
"When you entered your apartment that night, what did you find?"
"I unlocked my door and saw Jack Sutton staring at me, a gun in his hand pointed directly at me." Olivia exhaled deeply.
The ADA moved closer to the witness stand, he felt better being nearer to Olivia when he started asking more difficult questions. "What happened next?"
"Umm…" Liv paused. "Sutton grabbed me and dragged me into my bedroom. He threw me on the bed and ran his gun up and down my body."
"I know this is hard, but what did the defendant do next?"
"He… he undid the button and zipper of my pants. Then he unbutt… unbuttoned my shirt and tore it off."
"When the defendant did this what did he discover?" Barba could see the tears that were now welling up in the sergeant's eyes.
Liv took a deep, shaky breath. "He figured out that I was pre… pregnant. I was about eighteen weeks at that point and when I was no longer wearing a shirt, he could see it obviously."
"After he held you for nearly three hours, there was knock at your door who was it?" Barba asked.
"It was my boyfriend, Officer Brian Cassidy."
Olivia never told Barba or her squad that just a few weeks before they had broken up. She had decided that they didn't need to know, just because they had a fight and ended their relationship on somewhat of whim, didn't mean she didn't still love him.
"What did Sutton do after he heard the knock?" Barba could see the questions were becoming harder for Olivia to answer.
"He started to panic and I screamed for help. But after I yelled, he umm… he hit me with the gun against my jaw and then shove… shoved the gun in my mouth and threatened to kill me if I didn't shut up." Liv struggled to get the answer out. "Then he left me cuffed to my bed post and went to get the door."
"After Sutton went to the door, what did you hear?" Barba inquired.
"I could hear the voice… the voice of my boyfriend Brian Cassidy. He sounded worried and was asking where I was. Sutton replied with something like it didn't matter. That only made Bri… Brian mad." Olivia's breathing was starting to become shallow, as she held back the lump in her throat.
Barba inched a little closer. "When the yelling had stopped what did you hear?"
"It became silent for a moment and then something crashed to the floor. But next, I heard…" Olivia could hear the sound of gunshots ringing in her head and they made her voice stop for a moment. "There were… there were three gunshots."
Liv gritted her teeth and tried to keep her tears from falling, but it was so hard to recall everything from that horrible night and not be absolutely emotional. The more she talked about it, the more she wished that everything could be taken back, that it would all go back to normal, and that she wouldn't have to have any more flashbacks of the moment when Fin told her Brian was dead.
"When you were wheeled out of your apartment what did you see in your living room?" The ADA asked.
"There were pools… umm of blood on the carpet. There was so much blood and things were thrown over from the fight."
""This is the last question I have for you, but it is difficult." Barba prefaced the question. "That night, after being taken to the hospital, what happened?"
"One of my squad member, Detective Tutuola, came into my hospital room and told… told me that Brian, the father of my child, was… that he had died during surgery." Now, without any chance of stopping them, a few stray tears rolled down Liv's cheeks.
But she wasn't ready for what was next. The defense attorney stood up and Olivia finally really looked at Sutton. They made eye contact and he gave her a small smile, which sent a chill down her back. She couldn't do it; she couldn't let the attorney who attached to that smiling bastard question her.
Liv looked at Barba and then at the judge. "Do you… umm could we…" She choked on her own words.
The judge looked at her with sympathy. "Are you okay, sergeant Benson?"
"Could we take a short break?" Olivia replied.
With a simple nod and a bang of her gavel, the judge granted the court a thirty minute recess and Olivia left the witness stand and walked out of the courtroom.
The team and Cragen quickly followed behind her. They were worried about her and they knew she was in need of their support. When they exited the courtroom they found her across the hallway, sitting one of the benches. She looked slightly distraught and uncomfortable.
"Liv." Nick said. "Are you okay?"
Her head was resting in her hands and she was taking deep breaths trying to calm herself. "I think I'm going to be sick."
Before anybody else could talk to her, Barba came walking out of the courtroom, briefcase in his hand. "Olivia, are you alright?"
"I don't know if I can handle any more of this today…" Liv admitted, her voice wavering.
"You don't have to Liv." Barba assured her. "If you want me to I can ask the judge to recess until tomorrow."
"I think that might…" But before Liv could reply to Barba, she felt a sharp pain run through her stomach.
"Liv, is something wrong?" Amanda could see the pain that showed on her face.
Her hands rested on her stomach, Olivia could the feel the kicking of the baby, but her stomach was tight. She hadn't felt it like that before and she wasn't sure what was causing it. She tried to take a few deep breaths, but they were much shallower than before.
"Olivia…" Cragen now sat down next to her and watched as she relaxed for a second.
But then she felt it again and this time it was much more painful, causing her to let out a small cry. "Ahh."
And then she knew what it all meant. The pain stopped and Olivia could feel the gush of water stream down her legs, splattering to the floor underneath the bench.
"Oh, Olivia." Cragen looked down at the floor.
"No, no." Olivia was shaking and she had never looked more fear stricken. "This can't happen now. It's too early." Her eyes were wide with panic as she looked up at the man.
"I know that Liv." Amanda kneeled down next to her and looked into her eyes. "But we need to get you to the hospital now." The young woman was gentle but firm with her response.
With a look of sheer terror and her breathing unsteady, Liv nodded at the blonde detective.
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