Was that... my old house?

I stood on the front lawn to what I assumed had been the house I had grown up in. It looked exactly like it, after all. Small, but not too small. White, but not too white. One of those average houses where average humans lived and raised their average families. But that was besides the point. The grass was chilled and wet beneath the soles of my feet, mud seeping between my bare toes. It was a shocking contrast to the searing hot flames on my face as they licked the black sky above. I shivered, torn between hot and cold.

"... Mom?"

The air was sharp, white puffs leaving my mouth rather rapidly. My teeth chattered together and I momentarily glanced down, as if to clear away what I had just seen. I found myself wrapping my arms around me in an attempt to keep myself warm. It was almost painful. I curled into myself, possibly for comfort. I was in nothing more than a thin long sleeve and some baggy jogging pants. Suddenly, this struck me as odd. Why was I dressed like this again? Why did all of this feel so... weird? And surreal?

"Izaya!"

Back to the situation at hand. I glanced back up instantly, recognizing my mothers voice. I swallowed thickly, realizing that what I had been seeing was really what was happening. Sure, I had hoped that maybe I was dreaming, but I couldn't take that chance. Not with my family burning inside of my house.

"... Mom?" She was standing in the doorway.. The flames danced around her while her hands sat on the shoulders of two striking preteen girls. Twins. My sisters. Fire was exploding from all of the windows on both the main and second floor. The roof had already been engulfed. It would only be a matter of minutes until the walls collapsed upon themselves. I shivered, torn between rushing in and forcing them to come out with me, and remaining still. What was I supposed to do? Why weren't they trying to escape? Why were they just standing there?

Wait. Weren't Mairu and Kururi just starting high school? They're teenagers... not preteens...

Confused, I took a step forward, my numb feet finding a new patch of slick mud. It sent a chill straight up my spine. I ignored the slimy texture as I sauntered closer; but not too close. I still wasn't sure. I knew what I felt, and the feeling that rose in my chest was peculiar. Foreign. I needed to get them out of the house. And soon. With one hand raised to shade my eyes from the bright yellow and red flames, I reached out a hand hopefully so that my mother or sisters would take it. "Come outside." I said it a little more commandingly than I had intended.

Mairu shook her head, a devious grin spreading across her face. "No, Iza-nii. You don't belong in here." Kururi nodded in agreement, their arms wrapping around my mother. Something I never did as a child. Mom just smiled, sadly, like she did when she knew I was lying. It was one of those looks. Disappointment. Indifference. Possibly regret.

My father appeared in the doorway then, wrapping an arm around my mothers waist while slapping the other on Mairu's shoulder. In his eyes, I could see disappointment. Did I miss something? "She's right. Izaya-san. You don' belong here." He was smiling, despite the fact that there were flames spewing from the doorway. They were all smiling... so eerily and brightly, like they didn't care they would burn. Like it didn't matter...

"Wait." I took a step back, retracting my hand as I did. Conclusions were being drawn in my brain, and I couldn't help the flutter in my chest. "No..." My parents were still smiling, hands wrapped around each other. "I don't belong where!?" And in the fire behind them, there was a pair of black eyes. Ovular and slitted, they seemed to manifest out of the flames itself. I felt a tremble run through me for the briefest of seconds.

"Izaya..."A voice boomed from within, sending a pulse throughout the house and exploding the fire into a monster. I took a few more rapid steps backwards almost slipping on the slick lawn. I knew that voice. My stomach had dropped out of my body, along with my heart and my lungs. I suddenly forgot how to breath, how to move properly, how to function and think straight. Who was he!? There had to be somewhere I could run to, someway to escape. The voice was incredibly familiar, but I couldn't put a name or face to it. Perhaps I had only talked to him on the phone? But even then... a client would never be able to make me feel so... terrified... "Don't look so scared. They never mattered to you anyway. They are right where they belong; where you don't. It would be better if you let the memories burn."

Maybe... they didn't matter to me... But that wasn't true! I turned on my heel and ran. I needed to leave. I needed to get away. Because they had mattered! I just couldn't... I had to pretend... My job didn't allow me... My job... My personality... I really got lost in myself...

"Ahhh!" Struggling to breathe, I finally slipped. I fell to the ground faster than I had anticipated, my face very nearly smashing into ground at full force. I managed to catch myself, fingers sliding into the mud. The sensation made me sick. Glancing up in a hurry, I rolled to support myself on one elbow, glaring over my shoulder. "Who are you!?"

But I stopped, frozen solid.

Standing above me were two men, faces shrouded by hoods. They were wearing black sweaters and casual black jeans, hands shoved into their pockets. They looked harmless at first glance, but their only features alone set off alarm bells in my mind. A set of piercing blue eyes shone from beneath one hood, while a menacing scar ran down what I could see of the others face and jaw. I instantly recognized them both.

Yagiri Pharmaceuticals and Awakusu-Kai.

"Wait," I raised a hand in defence, ducking my head as memories flooded my senses. Running through an alley. Getting cornered. Being shot...

"There's no time for that." One voice said, the gruff voice of Ansen Hajime, from the broken Yagiri group. He shook his head, stopping my thoughts dead in their tracks. "You might as well not panic about the shooting right now. You'll be panicking about it in a few minutes." He shrugged nonchalantly a smile growing and twisting the scar on his face. A gun was pulled from his pocket and cocked at my chest. "How does it feel, to remember everything? To remember who I am? To know now what you didn't know then?"

I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. I refused to move. To show any form of weakness.

"You can't be here." The other, Akira Kai, pulled out his own piece and aimed it for my forehead. He wasn't smiling, but the hues of his eyes were laughing at me. Mocking me. He had damn well enjoyed shooting me the first time, and I knew he would enjoy it this time.

Again.

I felt my blood run cold. My saliva froze in my throat, and I didn't bother to consider why the house and all of the flames disappeared. Why my family disappeared. Because once again, I was putting myself first. Putting my needs and wants first. Wasn't that how I had gotten into this mess anyway? How could I forget such crucial information, like the fact that both Akira Kai and Ansen Hajime had been two of my most important pawns? They had been the main pieces to the game. And in my misguided reality, I had screwed up. I had been so caught up with the chess pieces that I forget they only represented real human beings.

And real human beings had the capability of figuring me out.

I remained still, wide brick brown eyes staring at the guns level with my body. I couldn't think straight. Because this couldn't be happening again. It had to be a dream. It was a dream, right? Swallowing audibly, I met the eyes of both men, one after another.

I flinched when one of them moved. Ansen dropped forward, falling to his knees over my body in a rather intimidating way. I cringed, pressing my legs closer together as he rested the majority of his weight on my thighs. He was larger, maybe Shizuo's height, but bulky. And heavy. "Get off of me." I said lowly in warning. I felt panic well up in my chest, but I refused to let it show. Akira chuckled, Ansen merely stared down with a malicious grin.

"You should be happy that this is as far as it goes... for now..." I felt a sweat break out on my forehead as Ansen pressed the glock into my chest. "What are you scared of more? Death, or Hell?"

Stunned, I kept quiet. My eyes went wide for my subconscious seemed to understand. Death, or Hell?

"Or, has Hell become death?"

My eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

Why couldn't I understand?

Feeling a little bit trapped, I did the worst thing possible. The only thing I really knew how to do in difficult situations. I opened my mouth. And my voice, strong as ever, almost convinced even me. "Death may or may not also be Hell, thus merging the two concepts together. And with both concepts merged together, you can't be scared of them separately. So theoretically I can't pick and answer, because I am alright with either option as long as I keep existing."

There was laughter, cutting off my ramble. Taking in a shaky breath, I glanced at the two men as they exchanged knowing looks. Grins twisted their faces like demons and I couldn't help but shudder. Like they were sharing an inside joke. And I was the punch line. My stomach dropped at the teasing idea that maybe, there was more to my story than everyone was telling me.

"Izaya..." I glanced up just as the guns were repositioned; one just over my heart and one against my forehead. Two clicks later and I had my eyes squeezed shut. I reconsidered my answer, and decided that I didn't like it.

"Wake up, Orihara."

I awoke with a start, violently sitting up from the cot and practically jumping out of my skin. There was a soft curse as I somehow found myself standing, grabbing onto the nearest object in an attempt to steady myself. I gasped, the world spinning white and blurry just as a set of gentle hands found my upper arms. Disoriented, I jerked back, instantly slapping them away. "Don't... touch me!" Hysterically breathing, I whirled on my attacker, almost falling in the process. Don't think just run. As absurd as it sounded, that was literally my thought process. I took a step back, eyes narrowed, breath heaving. My heart was racing in my chest. A blur of white and green moved towards me, and just as I raised my hands to defend myself or strike...

Slap!

Blinking, I realized that my head had snapped to the right and I was staring at my shoulder. What? Turning my neck back into it's proper position, I stared wide eyed at an angry looking Namie and a flustered looking Shinra. I put a hand to my cheek as a soft sting began to rise from the irritated skin. Namie suddenly shifted, crossing her arms over her chest and narrowing cold eyes. She was wearing a different green sweater than normal; this one had a hood. Her hair was pushed back from her face in an annoyed matter, and she tapped her foot rather irritably. "It's unfortunate to have you back." She said sourly.

But there was a slight quirk to her lips.

I blinked, lowering my arms, which had been raised almost in front of my face in a defensive gesture. I'm just at Shinra's. It's okay. No one's trying to kill me. Slightly confused, I awkwardly shifted back over to the cot before sitting down gently. I took in a steady but shaky breath, tempted to drop my head into my hands, before glancing up to Shinra. What happened? Besides having a nightmare and remembering the fact that I had been gunned down in a back alley like a rabid dog. "What..."

"Are you good? You were making a bunch of noise in your sleep, I thought you were having a seizure or something!" Shinra waved his arms before he shoved his way past Namie to grip me by my shoulders. I tensed, glaring up at him. "Did you have another nightmare?" He shook me lightly. His brown eyes were wide behind the glasses, and I momentarily wondered if something bad had happened.

I decided to ignore his questions. "Why is Namie in here?" I asked, mood souring rather quickly. I flashed her a quick look, seeing her normal cold expression return the glare.

Shinra lifted his hands from me, dramatically shrugging. "She seems to think her former occupation allows her to know more about your condition than I do," he leaned forward with a grin, raising a hand like he wanted to whisper without her hearing, "so I am letting her play doctor. It makes her happy."

Namie's face darkened, and I almost laughed. Namie playing doctor. That was an uncomfortable thought.

"Now, back to the matter at hand. You've been awake here, how long? Four or five days?" Crossing his arms, he grabbed his chin. He seriously contemplated it before I waved him to continue. Shrugging once again, he moving on. "You've had nightmares every night. Are they all the same?"

I blinked, suddenly feeling like Shinra was holding me under a magnifying glass. I plastered a fake grin to my face, keeping my masks in check. "And what if they were?"

"Then it means your traumatized and I finally have a legitimate excuse to send you to therapy." Shinra beamed, "Maybe they can assist you with you borderline psychotic behaviour... while helping with your trauma too, of course."

I knew he was teasing, but I still couldn't help but feel slightly irritated. The smile remained however. "I'm not borderline psychotic, and what you just said is technically 'changing' as opposed to 'helping'. I do not wish to change myself, and I do not wish to go to therapy, okay?"

Shinra chuckled. "So, you're saying that you don't want to go to therapy for help with your trauma, because it will change you, and you are happy with who you are now, trauma included?"

I clicked my tongue. Damn Shinra and his witty comebacks and technicalities. I decided to push the conversation along the original path. I glanced to Namie, not exactly liking the fact that she was still present. The less she knew, the less she could black mail me. "The dream was different. It was different this time."

Shinra nodded, seemingly unphased by the shift in topic. "No therapy then?"

"No." I sent him a glare before taking a breath. "No therapy."

Namie scoffed clearly hoping I'd agree. "I have some things to check up on. I just dropped by to make sure you weren't dead." She eyed me critically, "You should probably get up though. It might do you some good." And with that, she whirled on her heel and stalked over to the door without even a goodbye.

She's moodier than usual. Whatever could she have to do, beside stalking her brother?

"She's mighty considerate, don't you think?" Shinra was grinning as he watched my secretary leave the room with a huff.

I rolled my eyes and slowly stood up, stretching my arms over my head. My muscles stretched almost painfully, joints cracking here and there. Maybe it wold be a good idea to get up and walk around. Maybe shower, and eat? I could surf the net and catch up with my work, that would be good too.

I blinked, suddenly remembering what had occurred in my dream.

Akira Kai and Ansen Hajime. Right. My face darkened. Well. Looks like I have a new game to start playing.

"I know that face and no. No you will not be doing any work or plotting here." Shinra dragged me back from my mini daydream by grabbing my forearm gently. His voice, however, was stern and unrelenting, "Like Namie said. You should get up. Move around. Sleeping all the time can't be good for you. Rather. It isn't good for you!" He said rather loudly, pulling me towards the door. I groaned in response, to which he sent me a stern glance.

Walking was so tiring. My body felt heavy, and I wanted nothing more than to stop and sit down.

"Are you hungry? It's been almost a day since I stopped giving you supplements." I shrugged in annoyance at the mere thought of it. Shinra had dosed me with vitamins and nutrients that my body probably hadn't consumed in years. They had made me feel sick, amongst other things. That situation was caused by the fact that I had refused to eat after waking up. The notion of it had me so anxious that I couldn't actually do it. "Namie was whining this morning about how I 'clearly am no good of a physician,' because I 'don't know basic nutrition'. I can't believe that woman... she has done nothing but bicker and complain about everything! She doesn't like my coffee. She doesn't like my couch. She doesn't like the medication I want to prescribe to you. She doesn't like the way I treat people. She doesn't like Celty. She doesn't like Shiz-"

"Shinra." I said a second too soon. Was he about to say Shizuo? Didn't matter. He was rambling again and I couldn't help but groan. He stepped out of the bedroom, pulling me with him. I had no choice but to follow. "Can you let go of my arm? I can walk with my own two legs you know. You know, homo sapiens are basically the only species to-"

"Izaya." It was Shinra's turn to stop me from rambling. I smirked. Point proven. He grinned in return, dropping my arm and continuing his way down the hall. "So how about some breakfast?"

"How about some coffee?" I asked instead, making my way into the living room. I had to eat eventually; I just wasn't hungry.

I froze.

There on the couch, was Shizuo Heiwajima.

He was wearing his usual attire; that stupid get up his brother had sent him. I kind of wanted to send him normal street clothes, addressed from his brother, so he'd at least look a little more stylish than that. I was almost tempted to look away and just ignore him like he didn't exist, but alas. This was Shizuo Heiwajima. I needed to keep an eye on him, especially since he was currently occupying the same room as me. His eyes met mine.

"Shizu-chan." I tried to keep my voice light, playful even. The usual tone I used with him. A hand pressed against my stomach almost automatically as apprehension washed over me. I don't really want to deal with you right now. "Fancy seeing you here." And then I casually strutted across the living room, being as dramatic about it as I could, and plopped down on the opposite side of the couch from him.

He grunted, rolling his eyes. "It's real fancy."

I chuckled, rubbing my belly. Maybe I shouldn't have fallen like that? There was a strange pressure sitting between my hips and I couldn't help but fidget. Glancing first to the brute to make sure he hadn't noticed my discomfort, and then to the TV, I couldn't help but wonder what is was that an animal like him would watch. It was still a commercial, after all.

And awkward silence settled over us. Shinra was still in the kitchen, taking his sweet time in pouring some coffee. I decided to temporarily entertain myself. "Whatever are you watching, Shizu-chan?" I made sure to emphasize his name, earning a twitch in his temple.

"There will be none of that." Shinra quickly made his way back over. He stood in front of me, blocking my view from the television. Handing me a mug of coffee, he slapped my wrist before I could take it. I pouted, grabbing the handle harder than necessary. "Don't agitate him. And don't drink that coffee too fast. You need to eat real food with it. So what do you want?"

I gave him my best smile. "My stomach actually seems to be a little upset right now." And for added effect I rubbed my stomach. Something was doing somersaults and it was upsetting my entire system. "How about we talk abut it after I finish this?" I raised the mug with a grin.

Shinra didn't take the bait. He crossed his arms and the smile on his face became strained. "Or we can talk about it now, because your stomach is probably upset over the fact that you haven't eaten anything solid since you've woken up. It's been nothing but coffee and supplements and juice. You're going to pass out." He nodded, before glancing over to Shizuo. "And you know. I could always play dirty..."

"You wouldn't." But I knew he would. He would ask Shizuo – probably pay him even – to force me to eat. To spoon feed me, to shove it down my throat, whatever was needed. My stomach gurgled at the thought and in response to Shinra, I took a sip of the black coffee.

Just the way I liked it.

"We both know that he would, and I wouldn't pass p a chance to see you squirm." Shizuo said, even though I had already determined that fact for myself. He didn't look my way, but I could tell that he was rather irritated by the situation. More so by the fact that I was being stubborn.

I scoffed, drinking more coffee. This isn't sitting well. Rubbing my stomach, I set down the mug. Shinra broke out into a gin at this, stepping away from the coffee table and headed back to the kitchen. "So will that be some toast?"

I only grumbled in response, my eyes distracted by what Shizuo was watching on TV. Who would have thought that Shizuo would be into documentaries? I chuckled as they began to show ancient ship wrecks in the ocean. "So. Shizu-chan, why are you here?"

Because honestly. There was no reason for him to be.

He glanced over to me with a scowl, before turning back to the TV. "You know, Shinra's my friend too."

I nodded. Nice choice of words, there. Something Celty had said the day I had woken up – the only day I had seen her, actually – suddenly popped up in my brain, and I couldn't help but smile. "So you're here because you feel guilty, right?"

Judging by the look he shot me, I was surprised that I hadn't been jumped. He practically flashed his teeth at me like the animal I accuse him of being. A tingle worked it's way down into the pit of my stomach, and I suddenly felt sick.

Very sick.

Before I knew it, both of my hands were pressing into my stomach.

"Now, now, behave yourselves." Shinra stalked over with a plate in one hand and a coffee cup with his own name on it in the other. He shot Shizuo a dirty look before handing me the plate. I hesitated, aggressively locking eyes with Shinra before I gingerly took it and placed it on the coffee table. This wasn't defeat. "Best behaviour, you two." He said as he bravely sat himself down between us. He seemed rather proud about something. "Shizuo, if you're going to stay, don't hurt him or break anything."

There was a grumble from the other end of the couch.

"And Izaya," he glanced over to me, probably because I hadn't even glanced at the plate. "Eat."

Lying back with my hands casually clasped over my belly, I glanced down. Sitting on the glass plate was two slices of white bread, and what looked like margarine slathered all over it. I chuckled, shaking my head. "No can do. That looks disgusting."

Shinra glanced over to me with that look. The 'don't start with me' look.

Grinning, I strongly met his gaze. "So anyway. Where has Celty been?"

The question seemed to through him off because he suddenly looked displaced. "Eh? What do you mean! My darling comes home every night and goes to work every morning! She's been here! You've just been too busy sleeping and complaining and refusing my help!"

I chuckled, knowing very well that the Dullahan was spending more time away from home than normal. "Oh? I haven't seen her, and I am up every other hour." I was prodding him and he knew it. "Awh, did you two have a lovers quarrel?"

Shizuo growled from the other end of the couch, and the volume suddenly got turned up on the TV. "Stop being so nosey and loud."

"My dearest Celty and I never fight! Don't think you can distract me!" Shinra shook his head, pointing at the plate. "Eat, or I'll hook you up to a feeding machine and sedate you so you can't pull it out!"

"That's just mean." I rubbed my belly, eyeing the food warily. "What if I can't stomach it?" Because really, that was the question that had me a little nervous. My stomach wasn't feeling too great, and the idea of eating was sounding rather... risky.

Shinra sighed, throwing me an unmoving stare. "If you can't, then we'll find an alternative. It's just bread, I'm sure it will be fine. You need to eat something before your body gives out on you. So, either eat now or suffer later. Which would you prefer?"

I groaned, shifting again. I was just hurting myself if I didn't do it, right? I was Izaya Orihara. I shouldn't feel nervous about something as simple as eating.

We had a miniature staring contest, before Shizuo threw my a dirty look. He would have so much fun, trying to force feed me... "I supposed a bite won't hurt me." Even if it was margarine, which would probably kill me off before starvation, I guess a little bite or two couldn't do much damage. I grabbed the plate, setting it atop my skinny thighs. It really was in my best interest, or so I kept telling myself. The faster I got my strength back, the sooner I could leave.

Especially after the threat of a feeding tube.

Shinra visibly beamed as I began tearing at the bread so that I could just pick at the small pieces. No one paid me any mind as I mutilated my food. Shizuo wasn't even looking my way, and I secretly wondered why he was even still here. Does he really feel that guilty? I made a face at the slimy substance on my fingers before popping a piece of toast in my mouth. Shit. I really hated margarine.

I made a face.

Something flipped in my stomach area, but it was gentle enough that I decided to ignore it. It didn't feel like my stomach was upset, it felt more like something was irritated in general. I wonder if I should mention the pressure. I don't think it's normal. There was still an awkward tension between my hips, and I couldn't help but squirm uncomfortably. I caught Shinra staring, no questioning that he was medically determining if there was something wrong with me. He had such a ridiculous fascination.

Not that I'm really one to talk.

I forced another piece of toast in my mouth. "See. I'm eating. Now stop bothering me about it." I reached forward, grabbing my coffee mug and taking a sip. A small growl rumbled through my stomach, alerting me to the fact that I was hungry. Starving. Swallowing a mouthful, I ditched the coffee back on the table and began to pick at the toast at a relatively hurried fashion.

"Don't eat too fast." Shinra was grinning like an idiot. I felt a little bit bested, not that I'd ever admit it to his face. "And see. Doctor knows best." He shrugged, earning a small chuckle from Shizuo.

"At least the damn louse is eating." Shizuo groaned, before glancing back to the show. He remained quiet after, clearly happier with silence. He sighed, before glancing to his phone. "I have to go to work soon." He glanced to Shinra and then eyed me suspiciously. Not that I really noticed. I was too busy shoving the toast into my mouth to really respond or care.

"If you see Celty, make sure you stop and talk to her, alright?" Shinra said. Not suspiciously at all. Like Celty wasn't upset and avoiding the house or anything. I wonder what's going on. I polished off the plate, picking it up to grasp the last piece of bread. My stomach felt good, happy, full. It had been a while, and I hadn't realized just how deprived my body had been-

I suddenly dropped the plate on my lap, staring at it with wide eyes. My fingers were hovering in the air, and I could see that they were shaking. I couldn't move. Couldn't speak.

"Izaya?" Shinra glanced over at me with a questioning look.

I grabbed the plate and dropped it on the coffee table, like getting it as far away from me would help. Were my knees shaking too? That was weird.

"Izaya?" Shinra reached out, putting a hand on my shoulder. I could even feel Shizuo's stare on me. "Don't be so dramatic."

I swallowed hard as my stomach did a viscous flip. I felt mocked, betrayed even. I glanced up and meeting honey just before I hurled.

Once. Twice. Three times.

There was hand on my back, rubbing circles as I gasped. My body shuddered, and I jerked away from the touch, dry heaving over the floor again. My head had fallen between my knees, and my fingers were tangled up in my hair. What happened? Did I really deserve this? I coughed, feeling bile rise in the back of my throat.

Well. There went my breakfast of champions. Damn margarine.

"You good?" Shinra was kneeling beside me as I inhaled ragged breaths. He had taken his hands off me in favour of pushing the dangerously close coffee mug further away from the edge. I could feel that Shizuo was still staring, and my face heated up at the sensation. Of all times for the brute to be here, I had to suddenly get sick? Not too mention, Shinra's carpet was awfully light.

If it stained, I'd never hear the end of it.

"Yeah. I'm good." I whispered, rubbing my hands into my face. "No more toast." I chuckled before sitting up with my eyes covered. I rested my elbows on my knees and held my face. I rubbed the tears out from the corners of my eyes.

Shinra was silent, and so was I momentarily. My hands splayed over my stomach, which apparently wasn't finished with what it had started. I was feeling really light headed and spacey. I glanced over to Shinra, hoping I could convey what I was feeling. The doctor was glancing to the mess on the ground, concern suddenly shifting into a more serious acknowledgement.

I closed my eyes, wiping my mouth with my hand. My stomach groaned in protest once again, and I forced back the need to dry heave. But other than that, it looked like the worst was over. I was good, right?

"Izaya,"

I glanced down to the mess more accidentally than intentionally. Red, unsafe amounts of red, stained the carpet, and Shinra was reaching up to me. I quickly glanced to my hand, noticing that blood was streaked across it from wiping off my mouth. I suddenly held the limb away from me like it was contaminated. Slightly panicked eyes glanced back over to Shinra who was now standing. "Why am I..." Why is there so much blood?

A wave of sickness washed over me and I gagged, dirty hand covering my mouth as I leaned forward again.

"Shizuo, grab a bowl or something!" Shinra was standing safely to my side, grabbing my shoulders, "Izaya. Can you lay down, or are you going to throw up again?"

I removed my hand, breath shaky. "What is-" I cringed as a sharp pain set into my gut. Wrapping my arms around my stomach, I hurled a fourth time, more violently than before. And there went all of the toast. Face dropping to my knees, I gasped for breath. What is going on? The pressure between my hips only increased, and I momentarily wondered if I was internally bleeding. "Shinra – here-"

I sat up, hands pressing into my stomach. My current concern was the fact that I might die from recovery compilations after a bunch of people tried to kill me. The mere thought pissed me off, but not enough to override the pain that suddenly blossomed from within. A sharp cry was all it took to have Shizuo Heiwajima jumping up like a spooked cat, and Shinra shoving me over none too gently as he grabbed the hem of my shirt.

"How does it hurt?" His cool hand ran over my skin, thumbs gently prodding at my hard abdomen.

I couldn't exactly answer him, so I opted just to gasp instead. It felt like I was being torn apart from inside. Little, sharp, piercing pains shot through my entire system, and they all came from the pressure settled between my hips. I grabbed onto his hand when a particularly nasty pinch came, silently screaming. A hand slapped over half of my face as I endured the onslaught.

I hadn't been prepared for this. I never signed up for any of this, and to Hell and back again if I was eating or even looking at toast the same way.

I was breathing hard when the pain ceased. A sweat had broken out on my forehead, and I suddenly felt tired. My heart was beating erratically like I had just clear across Tokyo with Shizuo chasing me through the streets. My stomach was empty once again, and the disturbance had finally settled down. Did that happen just because I ate? I let out a soft exhale, relieved that the pain was ebbing away. My hands rubbed at my bare stomach like I could rid myself of the experience.

"Are you good?" Shinra asked cautiously, looking me over with his eyes before crossing an arm and rubbing his chin. Pondering. He seemed confused, and that had me worried. If the most obsessed, biological doctor couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, then I was looking forward to one nasty road to recovery.

Shinra abruptly hovered over me when I started coughing. "Shizuo, can you carry him into the bedroom?" He was pulling me into a sitting position, just in case I threw up again.

Shizuo seemed to hesitate, before coming to my aide silently. He loomed over me, before bending over and quickly scooping me up and into his arms like a puppy.

"Wait!" I almost screeched as I was effortlessly hoisted into the air. Air rushed past my face as I gasped from the sudden movement, the too quick movement. I grabbed onto the front of Shizuo's shirt out of reflex, realizing for the first time that Shizuo was actually really freaking tall. To my complete irritation, I curled into him, the motion sending my stomach into a fit. "Don't-"

"Shut up." And suddenly we were moving quickly across Shinra's flat. I squeezed my eyes shut again, and may have heard Shinra chuckle. Whether it was the fact that Shizuo didn't want to be caught with me in his arms, or the fact that I apparently stunk to him, we made it to the bedroom rather quickly. "You're always so difficult." And he almost dumped me onto the bed without a second thought. He still had to be somewhat gentle, after all, so the landing from being dropped was much softer than I had first thought it would be.

Shinra was there right away, grabbing at my shirt and pushing it back up. Feeling rather awkward, I shot Shizuo a dirty look while Shinra placed his hands here and there, pushing and prodding like he expected to find something solid or alien.

I rubbed my face, wiping the sweat away. "Shinra, I feel fine. I'm okay now." I threw an arm over my eyes so I didn't have to see anyone. I felt too exposed.

Silence.

I heard Shizuo shift, and then a few seconds later, Shinra's hand were removed. He fixed my shirt, and I timidly dropped my arm to glance at his face. He seemed puzzled but focused. His brain was turning over my symptoms and their possible causes. He was probably coming up empty though.

After a few seconds, he sighed, stalking over to me and dropped a hand on my forehead. I doubted I had a fever. "I don't think there's any internal bleeding." He said quietly. "I'll do a few tests to be sure, but. I'm." He sighed, looking away. "You might have to go see a specialist or get a full body scan. Next time, we'll try a hot pack. I'm not sure what that was, but I'll try and find something easier for you to eat in the mean time."

I stared at him, secretly shocked. That might happen again?

He suddenly turned to Shizuo, crossing his arms. With a sigh, he said "You're going to be late for work."

"Shit!" Shizuo suddenly pulled out his phone, checking the time. "Fuck, sorry. I got to go." He practically ran from the room, pausing in the doorway. Turning awkwardly, his eyes met mine briefly. "You take it easy, and stay out of Shinra's hair." He was unnecessarily threatening about it.

I chuckled in response and he left the room in a hurry. Shinra turned back to me, scratching his head. He waited until the front door slammed to speak to me. "Is there... something else you want to tell me?"

My stomach dropped. I wasn't sure why, but I felt the nausea return and a tremble started in my fingertips. I shook my head because no, there wasn't anything else that happened. I got shot, not beat. That was it.

Shinra sighed, placing his hands on his hips. "Well. I'll run a few tests, but it might just be a temporary thing. Get some sleep."

I sighed, feeling too drained to argue for once. I leaned back, pulling the blanket closer just in case I needed it. "Just make sure I don't die in my sleep, okay?"

Shinra chuckled humorlessly. "I'll be here if anything happens."