Aaaaaaalright - so here we go with the very, very, very, VERY delayed chapter 5! I'm sincerely sorry for this, but life is crazy when you're an au pair for three little boys! Time is something I don't have much of. But, to make up for it, this chapter is twice as long as the previous ones! I do hope you enjoy it. Things start to get a little intense between Emma and Regina now. I am going to continue this story for the long run, and I really hope you'll stick around for it! I'll try to update more frequently, promised. And as always, reviews are highly appreciated! I love hearing what you all think. Much love, Regalfangirl xo

P.S The typos in Emma's messages are intended. I did not have a stroke.

May 28th, evening at Emma's

Emma couldn't help but chuckle at Regina's question.

"Who takes these pictures of you? Is it like a camera on timer or?"

Emma smirked before sending her answer.

"Hehe you wanna take them? No these are actually from a photo shoot. There are like fifty more or something."

They'd been sending a lot of pictures to each other since yesterday, when Emma asked Regina for the first one. Emma had sent Regina a lot of pictures that looked quite a like, from a photo shoot she'd once did. Some of which she wasn't fully dressed. Emma had to admit; their messaging had taken a crazy hot turn all of a sudden. She wasn't quite sure how it had happened.

"My friend August got me that as a present for my 18th birthday."

Emma chuckled hotly as Regina's responses ticked in. She liked this hot and teasing turn their conversations had taken.

"I didn't say anything about that… but… I wouldn't mind.

"Oh okay! I've been thinking about doing a photo shoot like this actually… what an amazing gift! They're good, really good."

"And I like the thought of fifty more."

This started off a long and sort of deep conversation. Emma didn't have anything to do; she was merely waiting for it to be time for her to go out with August and Ruby. Even though it was only Wednesday, she was lucky to be off school both Thursday and Friday. They had decided to celebrate that at their favorite bar. Emma typed away on her phone, answering Regina in three different messages.

"Haha yeah I bet you wouldn't."

"I know it was kinda the first time I felt beautiful… August knew that I didn't feel like a woman or girl at all so yeah that was really sweet of him. I actually hated it in the beginning."

"Thanks, really! It means a lot."

Emma felt her heart tighten as she read Regina's answer. This girl was simply amazing.

"I think I would be very self conscious in the beginning… Really hating the idea. But I really think it helps in the end, as you say. Your friend is grand for doing that. Although I feel like I need to call you stupid for not thinking you're beautiful - that's a plain lie!"

She felt like telling Regina about her past. She felt like she could tell her anything, everything. But it might be too early to cast the whole bomb of her messed up life. So she decided just to dive in a little bit. She trusted Regina.

"Well, I was pretty nervous then. And I actually hated just the idea of a photo shoot cause I'm just not that girly or whatever… And about that, well if people talk behind your back or keep saying that you're ugly and stuff, you start to believe them... besides I did dress like a boy until I was like 15 or something so yeah... I wasn't feeling beautiful and I kinda still think that I wasn't... I mean I didn't hate myself or shit..."

It took a while for Regina to answer. Emma found herself walking in circles. She chewed on her nails as she so often did. Over ten minutes past before Emma's phone went off again.

"Oh people should just learn to keep quiet... Define ugly really? So what if you dressed like a boy. That shouldn't mean anything to people. I'm sorry that you didn't feel beautiful, although I'm glad it didn't cause anything else like hating yourself. But you really are beautiful Emma… and… and so sexy too. I'm sorry I had to say that. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise."

Emma stifled a sob. She wasn't even sure why. She felt like crying and laughing at the same time. What Regina was saying just… touched her, so deeply. She'd ben told all this before. Ruby, for one, had given her pretty much the same speech although with more swearing and "just shut up you're fucking sexy okay, end of story." But coming from Regina, it was like Emma was really hearing it for the first time. Like she really understood it. Damn, Regina. You're crawling under my skin. What am I gonna do with you. Even so, being who she was, Emma didn't want to seem vulnerable. So instead of pouring her heart out, she sort of shrugged Regina's words off. There was plenty of time to get emotional later.

"Well, I've always kinda liked myself. I mean I hate certain things about myself but yeah... I'm pretty glad with who I am or rather turned out to be…

Well, calling someone names is pretty common for youngsters, you know, so I guess ugly is one of these things... Thanks haha, I actually really love those pictures. I mean all of them somehow show my confidence and all, it was the first time I realized that I'm a strong woman, that I'm actually beautiful... It feels like I proved all of those idiots wrong… I mean sometimes I feel like I'm too confident or like myself too much, which is also shit..."

Emma stopped her endless typing for a second and blushed. I'm rambling. She must think I'm crazy. This is embarrassing. She added something to her message just to seem less weird.

"Thanks again, you're beautiful yourself. You can tell me everything too you know. Otherwise I'll just feel awkward about writing so much."

As Emma pressed send, she couldn't help but wonder how they'd gotten here. It all seemed to have gone so fast. There was still so much she didn't know about Regina. So much Regina didn't know about her. But Emma felt so comfortable talking to Regina. Maybe she even felt too comfortable… she was starting to fear whatever was going on inside her mind. Maybe even inside her heart. She didn't really know what was going on. But if she was honest with herself, she knew it was something… more. Further definition was not possible in her current state of mind. Maybe when I get drunk tonight I'll know. Emma shook her head and laughed at herself.

Regina read through Emma's messages again. She couldn't shake this unnerving feeling that the blonde was hiding something. Or at least she wasn't being completely honest. That's the same thing, genius. She felt like Emma was using this sarcastic trait of hers to make matters seem less important than they might really be. And it worried Regina. She felt this need to protect Emma, to make sure she was all right. But how could she do that when she barely knew her. Regina sighed and typed in her answer. You need to put all this on hold. Emma's a big girl. She can take care of herself.

"Oh don't feel awkward at all! I'm a great listener, and a great talker!"

Regina paused before continuing. Showing that I'm vulnerable, too might help, Regina thought to herself. So she dipped into her own troubles.

"I can imagine feeling like this really... It's a boost of confidence when you have literal evidence that you're actually beautiful. I guess I'm at that point where I can feel confident about my face, and I can see that I do have a pretty face, but the rest is still yet to come. I've always felt like I was too "dangly" and don't have enough "curves". So I might be confident about my face, but I'm not confident with my body. I want to be, but there's just things I can't overlook."

It took some time for Emma to answer. But when she did, it made Regina chuckle and blush.

"Well, yeah I was mainly talking about my character. I mean I've gained some pounds that I really want to lose again. Besides I've like the biggest thighs ever cause I eat way too much... I'm not a picky eater at all. And I'm sometimes not happy with my face though. Anyway, I think you still have a great body and even if you're not "curvy" or shit, you can still be and feel sexy and beautiful."

Regina bit her bottom lip. She was getting emotional now, and unlike Emma, she didn't feel like hiding anything. Sometimes she thought she sought too much attention, like she needed the recognition of her problems to feel good about herself. That could most likely be blamed on her mother. Either way, she typed away.

"Well women in my family are very small and dangly, so I got that trait. And I know you can feel both sexy and beautiful even if you're not especially curvy, but I just haven't got the ability to. That's why I think maybe a photo shoot like that would help me out... But maybe I should rather focus on eating more."

Regina suddenly felt bad about herself. For doing to Emma what she always did, to everyone. She wished she didn't need this. That she could just stop.

"Or maybe you'll have to find someone who makes you feel beautiful. Because I for once already think you are."

Regina sucked in a shaky breath. She felt her eyes burn with unshed tears. She wasn't used to being called beautiful. She couldn't remember the last time anyone else had told her so. She didn't know how to react. So she avoided the compliment at first.

"Well that would be the ultimate key, yes…

Emma's answer came quickly.

"I know. I really wish you'll find someone who's able to do that."

Regina furrowed her brows. Emma's words held an unspoken promise. Regina's head was spinning. If this had been a conversation in real life, silence would surely have spread as they'd just looked at each other. Even now, Regina looked into the air. She didn't know what to make of Emma's words. Lately they'd been teasing and talking so much in code that she didn't feel sure about what was going on anymore. She decided not to address it though.

"You're seriously the sweetest, Emma. I mean you don't even know me and you've seen three pictures of me."

Within seconds came Emma's reply, and as on cue, Regina giggled and blushed and felt her stomach flip wildly. The reaction that seemed to happen frequently lately.

"Haha I'm really not the sweetest but thanks. Well, you're more than nice to me. You're actually amazing and three pics are enough. Besides, I saw more and I actually wanna kiss your face. Ok. Bye."

Regina couldn't help it. This unknown sort of force inside her made everything she believed and all her fears loosen their grip around her. Something else was taking over her. Something stronger. It scared her in a new way. She was walking in blind, in unknown territory, and even though her steps would be cautious at first, she felt like she would soon be running, sprinting, towards something more powerful than anything else. And if there was something she knew for sure it was this:

"I want to kiss your face, too, Emma"

Later that night, at the bar

As Emma took a sip of her fifth beer so far, she felt the dizzying warmth of alcohol seep through her body, making her cheeks blush and her vision slightly blurry. The music was loud and it pounded unpleasantly in her ears. Honestly, she didn't feel much like partying. Even though the tracks they played here were usually good, today they seemed unreasonably loud and she wondered if she could ask the DJ to turn the volume down. Or she could make him. Her mischievous plan was interrupted as August came from the bar, balancing a tray of shots. Ruby threw her hands in the air in triumph.

"Gus, this is why we're friends!" She immediately gulped down two of the glass containing the brownish, sugary liquid. Emma scrunched her nose and instead took another sip of her beer. God, how she didn't want to be there.

"Come on Em, you don't want my money to be wasted," August said as he pushed the tray towards her, gulping down a shot of his own. Emma reluctantly took one of the nasty shots. She could never say no to that damn fool. As she tilted her head back and the liquid flooded her taste buds, she had to admit though, it was quite okay. She quickly snapped another one before the devouring wolf that was Ruby had gulped them all down. She did see August smirk as he'd noticed she actually liked the shots.

"Shut up," Emma muttered as she smacked her lips after her third shot. She was feeling really dizzy now, her head spinning too much for her liking. I have to get some air.

She rose too quickly from her seat and had to slump backwards in her chair to avoid stumbling into anything. August's hand was quickly on her shoulder?

"You alright there, sis?"

Emma nodded slowly.

"I just need to get some air. Maybe some water."

She rose, slower this time, and when her vision finally steadied she made her way towards the door at the back of the bar, leading to a closed off alley where all the smokers went. She rested her head against the brick wall outside and took a deep breath of the chilly spring air.

Not a minute passed before a guy with too much gel in his hair and a leatherjacket too broad for his shoulders approached her. He looked like he'd jumped out of Grease. Emma was not pleased, and even less so when he leaned in so close that she could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"What brings such a sexy woman as yourself out here alone?"

Emma pushed herself further against the wall, trying to get more distance between them. She felt nauseous with him this close by. And she was not in the mood for anyone's shit tonight.

"Not any of your concern, thank you."

"Oh come on, don't you wanna play?"

"No thank you. I'm also very much gay."

The guy laughed slyly, a big smirk on his lips.

"Let me be the judge of that."

Emma suddenly felt a hand groping her ass, a move he would soon come to regret. She smashed four hard knuckles against his nose and as the guy yelped backwards, Emma turned around on her heel and sprinted towards the door. She looked back to see a gush of blood covering the guy's mouth and already dripping thickly on his jacket.

As she made it inside she went for the restroom. It was empty, as people were more occupied on the dance floor or hovering at the bar. She went to take a sip of water, but flinched as she held her hand under the water. She flipped it over, only to see her knuckles bright red, the flesh having been scraped raw as she'd punched him. Fucking idiot. She flexed her fingers and grabbed a paper towel to wrap around her hand. One more reason to be a lesbian. She laughed dryly.

That's when she felt her eyes burn and her stomach flip. Suddenly she knew why she'd been in such a nasty mood all night. She was usually always up for a night out, but this night, she'd just felt like staying home. And it wasn't because she was tired or didn't want to see Ruby and August. It was because someone else was missing. Regina. She missed Regina like fucking crazy. She longed for her. In more ways than one. All these messages the last few days had awakened several emotions inside Emma, some of which she didn't know how to deal with, simply because it had never happened to her before. Right now though, she just felt hot. For Regina.

In the drunken state she was in, her feelings were all the more intense. She felt a lump in her throat that she desperately tried to swallow around but without any luck. I have to text Regina. She was as rational as she was sober, so within seconds she'd grabbed her phone and with much concentration typed a message to Regina.

"Stop being hot."

She didn't know why exactly she'd typed that. Maybe because the last picture Regina had sent her before Emma had left to meet her friends was exactly that. Hot. She'd been wrapped in a towel. Hair wet and unruly, falling around her shoulders in a way that looked both intentional and unintentional. Like, how could anyone look so hot, unintentionally? How was it possible? The top of her breasts had even been visible. The beginning of her cleavage. When had this happened? When had their "relationship" taken this turn? Emma couldn't recall anything anymore. She just knew that she didn't mind it at all. Frankly, it made her want more. Much more.

Her phone buzzed. Regina was being her sassy self. Emma couldn't help but smirk.

"Never."

Emma's answer was quick.

"Fuck u."

Abbreviations were easier at this point, since Emma had trouble seeing straight. A distant voice told her she was going to regret this conversation in the morning, but she ignored it.

"I don't even… I'm serious. Youre fucking hot. Smoking. Beautiful."

Emma felt her cheeks burn even though she didn't feel embarrassed. She was speaking the truth. Right now, in these drunken minutes, there was nothing but the truth.

Regina's message made her blush though.

"You are too. I'm not kidding. I actually gasped when you sent me that picture of you. I might have been starring a bit too long."

Emma typed in quickly. As she pressed send, she immediately regretted it though.

"I might have gottn wet when I saw your picture. Fuck. Blame it on the alcohol. No actually blame it onyour hotness."

Emma smacked her hand across her face. Shit. Idiot, that was over the line. What the hell am I doing? She's gonna run away screaming now. She doesn't want this. She's a… she's a lady, not like me. But what if she does? What if she by some miracle, actually wants me, too? Fuck. I…I have to be honest. I have to know. I can't keep quiet. But… fuck.

As Emma continued arguing with herself, she found herself typing in a long stream of messages that would sure leave Regina either wanting her or want nothing to do with her. Carpe Diem, Swan.

"I wanna hug yoy in rl; I'm not kidding."

"Shitm... Maybe I wanna make love to u."

"Ok without thda maybe."

It took a few agonizing minutes before Regina answered. In that time Emma imagined all the different answers she possibly could: "Emma, I don't know what to say", "I feel the same way", "What are you talking about?", "It's too soon", "Are you crazy? That's too much Emma", "Um, bye."

But Regina's answer was neither one of these. It was better, much better. It was promising. At least, it wasn't a rejection.

"This is where England and America are too far from each other. You smoking hot piece of woman, you're making me blush."

It was all or nothing now. Emma decided to go with the flow. Which in this case meant writing crazy drunk shit she would never have written had she been sober. Too bad I'm not, she thought to herself and laughed.

"Shit. I'm just incredibly horny rn."

"For you."

"I'm sorry. This is not romantic or shit."

"I'm actually just at the bathroom."

"You don't even wAnt to know this rn…"

"I wish yoy were here with me thiugu."

"Though."

Emma was satisfied with herself. She was just being honest. Thinking about that picture of Regina had made her wet. Right here, alone in the restroom of a bar. With the person she was hot for all the way on the other side of the planet.

Emma starred at the screen when Regina's reply came. She was confused by it.

"Oh I want to know."

Her answer to that was simple.

"What?"

"I so want to be drunk with you, just. I just want to be there!"

Emma furrowed her brows. If she was reading Regina's messages correctly, Regina might be feeling the same, but was too scared to say so exactly. Or too shy, maybe. It seemed like she didn't know exactly what to say. Or maybe she was just being nice and would break it off with Emma in the morning. Emma felt like an idiot for doing this to Regina. She didn't want to push her away or scare her. She just wanted her to know. She needed her to know. And blunt was the only way she knew how to get a message across. Even as the words she was typing tasted bitter on her tongue, she typed and sent them nonetheless. Here goes nothing.

"I wanna fuck u. Okay? Shit. Okay. Don't even listen. I'm sorry. im really sorry. I'm an idiot."

Three minutes. For three minutes Emma was banging her head against the cool tiles of the bathroom wall, wishing for the best. She figured Regina had lost her shit and didn't want anything to do with her anymore. But then came her answer, and it made Emma so happy and confused at the same time.

"Don't be sorry. And you're not an idiot. You're hot. This is hot. I'm hot. Not like, I look hot, it's just hot here."

"Fuck Emma how can this seriously turn me on."

Did Regina really want her? Could she? Was it actually possible? Emma blinked at her screen, perplexed. Fuck. She gulped down on a sudden lump making it hard for her to breathe. Regina was too good for her. Emma was nothing but a messed up orphan. Sure, she had a family and a job now, but that was all she would ever be. An orphan. What she'd gone through as an orphan had formed her and made her who she was today. But here was Regina, the most beautiful and hot woman on earth, turned on, wanting her? This seemed so wrong.

She replied with shaking fingers.

"You're hot? Like for me or? Shiiiiit.. I don't even deserve yoy. You're like fucking hot, okay?"

"Yes, really, for you. Would you stop that, you're fucking hot yourself, you can have me!"

You can have me? I can have her? Fuck. Shit. It's hot in here. It's hot…down there.

"I'm hot for you... Okay it's out. I don't even care. I wish you were with me even if I'm so fucking weird and don't deserve your love at all… It turns me on... I don't really know how you feel, but I wanna be close to you. Here. I'm sorry."

Emma felt tears prick at her eyes now. Stop being such a pussy. You've got no reason to cry. You're a fuck-up. Deal with it. Two messages from Regina ticked in, seconds apart.

"You should stop saying you're sorry, cause you shouldn't be! My stomach is doing insane flips right now and I'm just... Fuck, Emma. I wanna be there with you. If I came by, I would seriously walk right up to you and kiss you senseless."

"I'm aching here. And I'm not even drunk. I'm the weirdo."

Emma felt a tremor run through her body, pooling between her legs. She inhaled sharply. Her panties were definitely wet. What the fuck was going on? At the same time that she felt extremely hot and bothered, she also felt so incredibly sad. Because as much as she wanted Regina to be here, she wasn't. And how could she ever be? This was a recipe for disaster. Before she knew it, she'd spammed Regina with several heartfelt messages. She had no filter when she was drunk. This was the first time she was showing her vulnerability to Regina. And she was scared shitless. But she couldn't stop. She'd started this, and now she was going to finish it.

"Fuck. I really wish you were here. I'm nearly coming undone."

"I wanna touch you, kiss you."

"There all these bitches who just want penis... They're just so pathetic, I don't fucking care about them"

"I'm still sorry cauae I'm drunk. And I'm nearly crying cause I'm fucking alone... There all these people that just don't mean anything to me... But you…"

"If you were here."

"This isn't what it's supposed to be."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't even bother u."

On the other side, in Regina's room

Regina swallowed thickly. Everything was racing. Her mind, her heart. Her breathing was quick and shallow and her palms were sweaty. She tried to determine exactly what she was feeling. Tried closing her eyes to listen carefully to herself, her body. But it was just so damn difficult when so many things were screaming at her. I'm panicking. She blinked rapidly and shook her head. Shit. I'm panicking. No. I can't. She was so confused. She felt scared and happy all at once. Like this was what she wanted but she couldn't handle it. She wanted to want it, and she did want it, but she was scared of wanting in. She chuckled drily. Now she wasn't even making sense.

Emma's messages had caught her completely off guard. Sure, the blonde was very drunk and would probably not remember this in the morning, but "drunks speak the truth". And as much as Regina did feel like there was something more between them, something yet to be uncovered, this had come out of the blue. They'd never discussed it directly. It had always been teasing promises that neither of them had addressed. They'd let so many moments pass. But maybe they'd both known all a long. And now, today, drunk out of her mind, Emma had chosen to let Regina know how she felt. So why could Regina not just be happy and stop fucking panicking?

And now, with these last seven messages from Emma, Regina's heart was aching for her. She wished she could be there for her. Give her a tight hug and tell her it was all going to be all right. Kiss her. Regina smiled at the thought and felt her stomach do a pleasant flip. She hadn't been lying when she told Emma she was…hot. It was still a mystery to her. But there was definitely something inside her aching for release. And it only wanted Emma to be the releaser.

She decided to help Emma. Tried to make her feel better. It sounded like the blonde needed this from her right now. She sounds like she hates herself. How could she possibly hate herself? She's amazing…

"Emma if you feel like this then go home. Don't cry. I might be too far away, but I'm here, and I care. If you're not having fun, then just go. I wish I could be there with you and make you feel better. I wish I could just. Just touch you. I don't know what's going on."

"You're not bothering me. You could never bother me."

It took Emma a few minutes to answer. Regina was scared something bad was going to happen to her. She might be too drunk to take care of herself…

"It's the alcohol speaking. I'm sorry. I can't get home without my brother. He deserves happiness more than me. I can't get home without him."

"Because I'm gonna sleep at his place

"I have this bracelet, which will make a dream come true ONCE it goes off... and I wished that my brother finds his soulmate"

"It's still there."

Regina furrowed her brows. Brother? Emma had never mentioned a brother. I guess it slipped her mind. She couldn't help but smile at how Emma was rambling about something random all of a sudden. Even though her stomach dropped at Emma suddenly changing the subject. She's not okay. She can't pretend like she's okay when she's obviously not. How do I get her to open up to me?

Regina searched for words. She wanted nothing but to keep Emma safe, even if that meant keeping her safe from her own self-destructive thoughts. But how could she when she was so far away? Damn this.

"Emma you deserve happiness just as much as he does. But you're seriously the sweetest and just best sister for doing that. It seems like you have so much love for your brother, and I really adore you for this. But you have to make sure you're not miserable yourself."

Emma's answer frustrated Regina even more. She was avoiding the actual problem.

"So I just hope it goes off.. okay, I firstly wished thar I find my soulmate but I kinda changed the wish. I don't even know."

"I kinda just noticed thar I'm too concerned with myself. He's fucking 28 years old and he's the sweetest guy there is. He deserves someone who can mean the fucking world to him. I don't.

Regina typed quickly and maybe a bit too angrily. But how could Emma think for even a second that she didn't deserve love? You told me you didn't hate yourself, Emma…

"You do. Of course you do. You deserve love, you deserve happiness, and I don't even want to argue with you on this one. Everyone deserves this."

"You don't even know me. I'm sorry. I just... I don't even know."

Regina kept going.

"You're a human being. That much I know. And that fact makes you worthy of love just as much as any other human out there."

Regina sighed deeply. Everyone did deserve love, right? She had to tell herself that at least. Otherwise… she was screwed.

"I should just dance with one of these fucking girls to at least feel something

"Okay, I can't."

"I don't even knoe what I'm doing."

"I'm a fucking idiot."

Regina was frustrated by now. Why didn't Emma listen to her at all? Yes, you're a stubborn idiot. Please, why won't she just go home…

"No. You're drunk and you're sad. And that's not the best combo. I don't blame you for feeling this way. I don't judge you. All I'm asking is that you go. Because you're clearly miserable. Can't you ask for his keys and just go? You shouldn't torture yourself like this."

One minute passed. And as Emma's messages ticked in, Regina felt her heart sink deep into the pit of her stomach. She shivered. Fuck. Emma was angry.

"No, I'm okay."

"Don't fucking pretend to know me."

"I'm sorry."

"I shouldn't say this."

"I'm okay. I'm fine, okay."

"Bye."

Oh god. What did she do? What did she say? She was just trying to help, she just wanted Emma to be okay. Shit. Was that a goodbye? Was this goodbye? How angry was she exactly? I have to fix this. I…I can't lose her.

"I'm sorry, I'm only trying to help. You're not giving off the happiest vibe; I was merely making a conclusion to what I see you write. I'm sorry if I misunderstood something."

Regina was biting her bottom lip hard in anticipation. Emma sent several messages in reply.

"I'm sorry."

"Just please don't even answer me. I don't deserve it."

"I am fucking sad and I would never admit that aloud. I'm happy okay."

"I've never like this when I've been drunk. I'm sorry."

"Please don't care."

She couldn't help but feel relieved. She wasn't angry after all. Or maybe her anger towards Regina was muted by her own misery… She was right though. Regina didn't know Emma at all. She'd only known her for four days. But she still felt like she had a responsibility towards her. And the thing was – she could hear herself in Emma's messages. She'd been there. Hell, she often still went there. All these self-destructive thoughts can drive you mad. But she wouldn't wish that upon her worst enemy. And especially not Emma.

"Well then I'm sorry for dragging it out of you... I just... I don't want you to feel like this. I'm not pretending to know you, cause I know I don't. I'm not saying that I know anything about you. But I can't help caring, even if you tell me not to. If you want me to just shut up and leave you alone then I will."

Regina didn't know exactly what to do or say. She didn't know what her limits were or what she was even allowed to say. So she just tried to stay true to herself, what she was feeling and thinking, but she was so scared that she'd cross a line. Finally Emma answered.

"I'm always happy... I don't even know...I'm the one who makes everyone smile, I'm the funny one."

"I'm honestly sorry. I care about you. And what I'm doing isn't good for you in any way. Fuck ... I'm just gonna wait for my brother… I can do this. I'm sorry. I've never meant to hurt you. I adore you."

"I'm gonna dance my troubles away. I'm sorry. I adore you. And I can't deal with you not being here."

Regina felt her heart swell inside her chest. Her throat tightened and she had to keep tears from spilling. "I care about you." Was it really true? Did this amazing woman really care about her? Did she in any way deserve her? Oh Emma, you didn't hurt me. God no. She longed for the blonde to be by her side now more than ever. She was missing her. She was missing someone she'd never met. This was crazy. But even in all this craziness, this drama – it felt right. She took her time replying, and it ended up as a long one.

"You haven't hurt me Emma. I'm trying hard not to seem like a know-it-all right now, but I know about feeling this way. I'm trying to help because I... I just remember. I remember thinking stuff like you're writing. And of course I don't know you, so I can't know exactly how you feel or even begin to understand, but all I know is that I don't want you to feel this down. I... I'm sorry if I made you angry or even sadder. That wasn't my intention. I'm truly sorry if I did anything to hurt your feelings. Have fun dancing then. I adore you, too. I wish I could give you the biggest hug right now."

Regina had been lying in her bed, ready to sleep, already when Emma started texting her. Now it was pretty late and she was supposed to get up for class tomorrow, so she really needed to sleep. It must almost be morning at Emma's by now. Wow. Once again she wished the blonde would just give up and go home. She waited for Emma to reply, but nothing happened. After ten minutes, she decided she better sleep. So she wrote one last message to Emma.

"I'll sleep now. I really am sorry if I hurt you. I was just trying to help. Please know that I don't in any way pretend to know you. I would never do anything like that. I would love to get to know you though. Really. I hope you find a way to enjoy the rest of your night out. You do deserve it. Again, I'm really sorry."

As she put her phone down on her nightstand, it buzzed persistently. She shook her head gently. Of course.

"I'm sorry. I'm fine okay."

"You didnt hurt me!"

"Youre fucking awesome. Have sweet dreams."

"I adore you."

"I'm the one who needs to be sorry."

"Fuck. I shouldnt have said any of those things."

"You havent done anything wrong."

"I'm fine. Really."

"I just sometimes write shit."

Regina smiled warmly at her phone. This woman. So frustrating but so adorable all at the same time. What am I going to do with you… She still wasn't convinced that Emma was indeed fine. But she couldn't worry about that right now. She'd done enough damage already.

"It's okay. Really. I was only worried that I hurt you. I don't want you to be angry at me. If you say you're fine, then I'll stop bugging you about it. Just know that you can always come to me. Sweet dreams to you when you get there."

"If I'm sad it hasnt anytbig to do with you."

"I adore yoy."

"You could neger hurt me. Youre wat too sweey."

Regina chuckled. That was sweet, but not entirely true. Oh Emma, you have no idea what I'm capable of.

"Okay then. Adore you too. Oh, believe me, I can bite if I want to. But I don't want to with you."

Emma simply kept going.

"Sleep tight, love and Im sorry if I hurt you."

Regina was a little annoyed by now. She'd told Emma several times she hadn't hurt her, and it was true. She was just… shocked.

"You didn't, I was only shocked. But I understand now that you didn't mean it. It's fine. Thank you."

"Im sorry. I didnt mean to make you shocked or fuck."

"I dont really get it but I will once Im sober."

She really needed to sleep now. And Emma needed to get home and in bed, too.

"Just enjoy the rest of your night, don't worry about it."

"Thank you. I adore you. I'm sorry if I caused you any trouble. I'm an asshole."

Regina replied quickly, her eyes heavy by now.

"It's okay Emma, really. I adore you too. Stop worrying about me now, go dance. I'll sleep, it's 12am after all."

Regina quickly dozed off, Emma the last thing roaming around inside her head. And in her dreams, the blonde was the center of attention. When she woke up the next morning, those emerald eyes were the first thing to enter her mind. And when she checked her phone with sleepy eyes, Emma was there in several unread messages.