A/N: Decided to make this a threeshot instead of two, as intended, because clearly I have no control over the length of anything. I didn't read this through super carefully yet, forgive the definitely present typos...I'll probably be editing them periodically, as is my sloppy policy. But Tumblr anons are getting impatient and I've already neglected work for too long. Hope you enjoy, let me know what you think!
Fifth Year
Her tenure as a prefect doesn't get off to a great start: Piper is oddly distracted throughout the Head Boy and Girl's speech about prefect responsibilities, just because Alex Vause is standing right beside her, looking completely bored and unruffled. Her green and silver tie is loose and the sleeves of her robe are rolled up, giving Piper a view of Alex's new tattoo, a tribal armband that keeps twisting and rearranging itself in a completely distracting manner. Piper had been pointedly not paying much attention to Alex for the last half of fourth year, but she's still pretty sure it wasn't there before summer. Which of course begs the question of how Alex managed to enchant it since she can't do magic during school holidays.
Not that Piper cares.
Because, really, last years strategy had worked for her. It's nice that Alex seems to hold no ill will toward Piper for the freeze out, but that's no reason to go back on it. Piper still shivers a little every time she remembers that burst of rage that knocked Tiffany out. Whatever guilty obligation she apparently feels for Alex is clearly dangerous. She's not going to put herself in that position again.
But when they're sent out to patrol the train, Piper steps aside to wait for her fellow Ravenclaw prefect, only to have Alex sidle up to her instead.
Alex smirks and arches an eyebrow, like she's making fun of Piper even before the conversation begins, with a fairly innocuous, "Have a good summer?"
"It was fine." Piper shifts her weight nervously. She can't help but notice the way the other prefects are side eying them as they hurry by, even the male Slytherin. "Yours?"
"Good." Alex's grin widens a little. "You seem tense."
Piper feels her face get hot, and she starts down the corridor, muttering something about patrol. Alex ignores her, falling right into step with Piper and continuing conversationally, "I mean, I understand why. I'm pretty scary...I'm assuming you heard? I can hex with silent, wandless magic. Very dark stuff." She purses her lips to hold back a smile, eyes gleaming with amusement. "You know...there've been a lot of times that would have come in handy. Lot of people I'd like to hex. But it's the craziest shit...I can never seem to make it happen when youaren't around."
Piper scowls, finally slowing to a stop and rounding on Alex. Her chest is starting to prickle with defensiveness. She shouldn't have to feel bad about being the one person who actually stuck up for Alex. "Look. I tried telling people what really happened. It's not my fault no one - "
Alex is laughing at her. "Pipes, chill." The easy, unthinking nickname heats Piper's face up again. "I wasn't accusing you, dumbass." In spite of the insult, Alex's smirk slowly softens into something more genuine. "I wanted to say thanks, but you kinda never gave me the chance." Piper looks away, guilty, but then Alex smirks again. "Turns out I kinda like being feared. So it all worked out."
Piper smiles clumsily at her, but she can't think of anything to say. They're walking side by side now, barely squeezing through the space outside the train's compartments. Finally, Piper comments, trying to regain some semblance of casual dignity, "But you still made prefect. In spite of your new reputation."
"Unlike the general student population, I think the headmistress and professors are smart enough to know a fourteen year old can't do wandless magic. I'm very talented, but even I have limits." Alex nudges Piper's elbow with her own. "Though nonverbal magic is pretty badass of you. Unless I just missed a hex."
"You didn't," Piper says quickly. "I...I didn't even really mean to hex her." The light in Alex eyes dims, just the slightest bit, and Piper realizes it sounds like she's saying she wouldn't have intentionally defended Alex. "I just mean...I didn't even have time to think about it. I don't know what happened."
Alex stops moving, and Piper instinctively stops, too. For a second, Alex just looks at her, eyes roving her face like she's picking apart Piper's expression. Then, slowly, Alex smiles. "I know."
"What?"
"I know why you did it. But you aren't going to like it."
"Fine, what?"
"You like me," Alex says with a shrug, and it's clear from her tone she means it in the most simple, straightforward way possible.
"Um..."
"You like me, and you want to be my friend."
Damn her. Piper grits her teeth, because there's no way to argue without sounding completely rude, but Alex is smirking at her with this infuriatingly smug expression on her face, and it makes Piper feel like arguing.
"We are friends," she says finally, but even she knows it's a feeble statement.
"No. I don't have any friends," Alex says matter-of-factly, and Piper feels a swoop of obscure admiration - and, strangely, jealousy - that Alex is so unbothered by that fact. "You just acknowledge my existence...or you used to. Hey, look..." They've reached the end of the train, the only time a compartment door has been opened; it's empty inside. Alex throws Piper a grin over her shoulder as she walks inside. "Wanna sit? Be like old times."
Piper follows her, trying to tamp down the distant, dizzying feeling that she's walking into something beyond her control. This is stupid. She hasn't even gone looking for her friends yet. She hasn't seen Tasha or Poussey in months, and here she is blindly following Alex Vause around the Hogwarts Express like she's the person Piper missed over the summer.
Alex smiles triumphantly when Piper settles onto the seat across from her, closing the compartment door before she does. Piper feels nervous, for some reason, but fortunately Alex's momentum seems to have stalled, and she doesn't pick back up the awkward conversation.
They've been sitting in silence for nearly a minute when Piper blurts out, surprising herself with her eagerness, "Can I ask you a question?"
"Go for it."
"Why were you so terrible in class the first month of school?"
Somewhere in the back of her mind, Piper's been wondering that for four years. All the amusement vanishes from Alex's expression, her eyes going hard and distant. For a second, Piper thinks she's going to refuse to answer. Really, she can't blame her; they really aren't friends, especially now, when Piper refused to even look at her for the last five months of last term. Piper hasn't earned the right to personal questions.
But then Alex meets her gaze and says seriously, "Because I found out who my father is. The Sorting Hat mentioned him, that he was a Slytherin, too...it said he was wild. So I looked him up, the first day of classes. I knew before everyone else found out."
This is startling news all on its own; Piper had always assumed, sickeningly, that Alex had heard the rumors the same as everyone else. Swallowing hard, Piper asks hesitantly, "But what does that have to do with...you in class?"
"I hated magic. My magic, at least." She gives a short, bitter laugh. "Everyone in my house thinks I'm such trash because I'm practically Muggleborn. I wishI was. I wish it just came from nowhere. But when I found out it was from him, and everything he did...it made me not want to do it. I almost left."
The thought of that, Alex leaving, makes Piper's chest constrict. Even though they aren't friends. Even though it wouldn't have altered the last four years of Piper's life in any obvious ways.
Alex's eyes are clouded over with bad memories, and she draws a deep, steadying breath, visibly shaking it off. She finds Piper's gaze again. "My turn for a question."
"Okay..."
Crisp and calm, like she's had the question locked and loaded throughout the whole conversation, Alex asks, "What do you think of me?"
The vague open ended nature of the question makes Piper uneasy. "What do you mean?"
"I know you don't think I'm into dark magic. Or that I'm a death eater in training. Or that I'm a Squib, though thankfully pretty much everyone seems to have let that go after your Doggett attack, thanks again, by the way. So." She arches an eyebrow. "What do you think of me?"
Piper can't look at her. She mentally combs through potential answer, scrambling for something inoffensive but neutral. "I...I think you were nice, that first day on the train. And when you've shown me spells. I know you've never done anything to anybody. And...I think it's unfair, the way everyone treats you."
Piper ventures a look up, pleased with her answer, but Alex is glaring at her, eyes hot and narrow on Piper's face. "Bullshit. You don't just feel sorry for me. You didn't keep saying hi to me because you feel bad. And you sure as hell didn't look for me every time you walk into the Great Hall out of some charity case obligation because I was nice to you for a couple hours before you and everyone else figured out I was a Slytherin and a Death Eaters kid."
The level of anger in the words surprises Piper. Even Alex herself looks flustered by her outburst, like she'd gotten away from the point she wanted to make. They sit for a minute in harsh, angry silence. Finally, Piper can't stand the discomfort of the compartment anymore and she gets to her feet. "We're supposed to be patrolling..."
"Oh, please. You've ridden this thing five years in a row, has any prefect ever looked on in on your compartment?"
"No," she admits, now feeling foolish just standing there, robbed of an excuse to leave but not wanting to sit back down and commit herself to staying here. Finally, a little petulantly, she says, "I never said I felt sorry for you."
Alex isn't looking at her, her face tilted to stare out the compartment window. "Okay."
Merlin, Piper just wants out of there. "I should go...I haven't even seen my friends yet." She winces at the words the second she says them, and Alex lets out a hiss of a breath between her teeth but doesn't say anything else as Piper walks out of the compartment.
Well. She thoroughly blew that.
Alex slumps further down in her seat, scowling at herself. The whole confident, casual act was probably undermined when she yelled at Piper.
She'd been thinking about this all summer, planning it out in her head, even before the prefect badge surprisingly arrived in the mail and made finding a moment to talk to Piper easier.
It had sucked, last term, with Piper ignoring her completely. Sucked a lot, actually, which is frankly pathetic considering she and Piper used to have maybe two conversations a year that went beyond simple hey's. But considering that, the loss of Piper's mere acknowledgment had been much more obvious than one might expect. The absence had permeated, and only when it was gone did Alex realize how constantly aware of her Piper had always been, even when she wouldn't speak.
There was a lot less eye contact in her life, suddenly, and even though that still sucked, Alex had allowed herself to be retroactively smug at the full discovery of how frequently Piper had been looking over at her for the past four years.
The motives behind Piper's freeze out hadn't been hard to figure out, and they're oddly encouraging. It meant Piper knows, now, that she has some degree of attachment and investment in Alex beyond a long ago conversation on a train. Obligation or pity can't explain the level of emotion that had obviously enabled her to knock out Doggett like that.
Sure, it's frustrating that Piper's response was to cut Alex off completely, but it's not insurmountable. Even from a distance, Alex is pretty sure she understands Piper, at least a little.
So she'd figured Piper wouldn't blow off a direct confrontation - which she hadn't. Alex had planned to be charming and cool and take advantage of the fact that Piper totally likes her - which she had been, until the very end, when she ruined the whole thing.
Jesus. Merlin. Whoever.
Alex pulls her wand out and starts absently changing the colors of the seat cushions across from her, muttering spells under her breath. It has a distracting, calming effect; right now, she needs to remember that she's actually glad to return to Hogwarts.
She's missed magic. Being in the muggle world is like living with one hand tied behind her back. Maybe two. She'd spent the summer working at a coffee shop, fighting frustration every night as she hand washed all the equipment and mopped the kitchen floor, unable to get past the knowledge that she could have the whole process finished in a few seconds and a sweep of her wand.
Alex always feels guilty, thinking that way. After all, her mother's been wiping down tables and washing dishes for practically her whole life, no shortcuts.
Thinking of her mom has Alex reaching instinctively to her hips, but of course there's no pocket in her Hogwarts robes, and even if there was, her cell phone wouldn't be inside it. Damn it. God forbid technology screw up the goddamn aesthetic in the wizarding world (though her mom does still get a kick out of the school owl Alex uses to deliver letters).
She gets bored with the seat cushions, and instead turns her wand on the prefect badge pinned to her robes, sending it cartwheeling through the air in idle patterns. She's not sure what exactly motivated the choice to give it to her, whether it's just that she's top of classes for her house and year, or if she's too much a loner to be a proper troublemaker - Alex has never considered herself much a rule follower, but there's something lame about breaking curfew or wandering out of bounds all alone. Or maybe the intimidating, dark reputation she'd gained after the Doggett incident will just make her an effective disciplinarian.
Eventually, Alex returns the badge to where it belongs, her craving for pointless, muscle flexing magic temporarily satisfied. She should maybe return to the prefects carriage, but she's too embarrassed to risk running into Piper again just yet. She'd pushed too hard, clearly, overestimating Piper's emotional investment.
So Alex sits alone in the back compartment for the rest of the journey, trying not to glance hopefully at the compartment door every time she thinks she hears footsteps.
Even when they arrive to the Great Hall and sit down in the comfortingly familiar seats at the Ravenclaw table, Piper still hasn't shaken the conversation with Alex. It doesn't make sense, why Alex rattles her so much. She shouldn't be important enough to do that.
Never mind that she's right, that it's not just that Piper feels sorry for her. Piper does like her, she always has, ever since that first day on the train. She'd wanted to be her friend right away, and Alex had never one done anything to change Piper's mind on that point. It's her own stupid cowardice, the fact that it was just easier to fall into step with everyone else at school when it came to Alex.
Maybe that's why Alex gets to her so much. She's a reminder of Piper's weakness.
The Sorting is a good distraction, especially when the hat shouts out, "Chapman, Calvin!"
Piper half stands out of her seat to keep her eyes on her little brother, feeling truly out of her head for the first time since leaving Alex. It takes just over half a minute before the hat calls out, "GRYFFINDOR!"
Disappointment and shock swells in her chest as the Gryffindor table bursts into applause for their first new addition of the day. Piper feels an instinctive wave of anxiety - what are their parents going to say?! - but Cal is trotting over to his new table with a wide, satisfied grin.
Getting sorted into another house, breaking family tradition and disappointing her parents, had been her biggest fear when she started at Hogwarts. Her little brother actually wanted that.
No wonder he's a Gryffindor. Her eleven year old brother is braver than she'll ever be.
Piper turns around, catching Cal's eye at the Gryffindor table. He grins at her, then gives a little apologetic shrug. Piper forces a smile back, shaking her head in fond exasperation.
She turns back and sits in silent, broody contemplation, not paying much attention to the rest of the Sorting until the food appears on the plates. Even then she's mostly quiet, as Tasha and Flaca and the other fifth year Ravenclaws chatter back and forth around her.
Eventually, Tasha jams an elbow into Piper's side. "Girl, you've been all clammed up since the train. You have some sort of tragic summer romance you're leaving behind or something?"
Across the table, Larry Bloom's head shoots up in interest, but Piper ignores him, glancing at Tasha and shaking her head. "No romance."
"She think she's too good for us, now that she's got that badge," Flaca says with a smirk.
"Hey you never told us who the other prefects are."
"Uh. Well you know Poussey and John Bennett are Hufflepuff. Sophia and Robbie are Gryffindor. And, um...Wyatt and Alex Vause are Slytherins."
She'd been hoping to blow past that, but there are immediate reactions.
"Vause?!"
"Seriously?"
"Who in Merlin's name would let her be a prefect after what she pulled with Doggett?"
Piper feels Tasha glance sideways at her, waiting to see if she's going to say anything. She doesn't.
When the feast is over, Piper gets to her feet. "I gotta show the first years where to go. I'll see you in the dorm."
She starts to corral the tiny eleven year olds, who don't include her brother, toward Ravenclaw tower. Across the Great Hall, she sees Alex smiling reassuringly at the newest Slytherins. She watches for a moment, when suddenly Alex looks up as though aware she's being watched. Her eyes lock with Piper's, her smile falling instantly, and it makes Piper's chest pang.
Their schedules are intense right off the bat, the immediate indication of O.W.L. year. Piper's studying her list of classes when Cal comes trotting over to the Ravenclaw table, smugly flicking his new red and gold tie in her face and almost gleefully telling her he'd owled their parents.
"As long as you're happy," she tells him with an eyeroll, instinctively tucking his tie back into his robes.
"I am," he says assuredly. "Not that you nerds don't seem great."
Piper shoves him playfully and he goes hurrying back to his own table, but it makes her think of Alex again, the way she made nerd sound almost affectionate yesterday.
Piper returns her attention to her schedule, looking to see when they have classes with each of the other houses.
She has to wait until the afternoon for double Transfiguraton with the Slytherins, but she's been thinking about it all day, and is pretty sure her resolve is strengthened enough.
The Slytherins are already there, filling up the left side of the classroom, and Alex is sitting alone at a table near the back and center.
Piper walks to the table and hesitantly leans her books on the corner of the table. "Can I sit?"
Alex looks up at her, undisguised surprise in her expression. "Of course."
It's not exactly the sweep of scandalized reaction Piper had imagined in her more anxious moments, but people are definitely paying attention. Most of the other Ravenclaws just looked shocked, shaded with varying degrees of judgmental, but Tasha is tilting her head at Piper like she's trying to figure something out.
Piper ignores them, just smiling at Alex like she does this all the time.
They don't get a chance to say much, as the professor comes in to give the typical lecture about the importance of their O.W.L studies.
After fifteen minutes of getting Piper's anxiety all the way up, they start practicing vanishing spells on snails, but it's tough going and doesn't leave much time for small talk. Across the room, Tasha's the first one to get it right, over halfway through the lecture, and Alex succeeds about five minutes later. But they're the only ones to manage it, and the rest of the class gets piled on homework.
Everyone else seems to take their failures in stride, but Piper stays at the table, still muttering the spell under her breath and not passing her snail back as everyone else does.
She can feel Alex watching her as she slides her books back into her messenger bag. Piper cuts her eyes over, smiling wryly, "Any tips?"
"I'm not sure, I'm still not consistent with it..." Alex pauses before tentatively added, "We could meet up in the library later and work on it, if you want."
Piper hesitates, thrown off by the quick turn around of that invite, when she hears Tasha call from the door, "Pipe! You coming to Charms?"
Piper glances over her shoulder; Tasha's waiting impatiently for her in the classroom doorway, and there's a cluster of other curious Ravenclaws hovering as well. The nosiness in their faces pisses Piper off, and she turns back to Alex and says, "Yeah, sounds good. After dinner?"
Alex tilts a small, crooked smile at her, but her eyes are lit all the way up. She nods crisply. "Yeah. Cool."
Piper waves as she walks off to join her friends, falling into step with Tasha and trying to ignore the others, crowding her with questions.
"Tell the truth, Pipe...are you being imperiused?"
"Yeah, what does she have on you?"
"Shut up," Piper grits between her teeth, but it's quiet, and mostly she just ignores them until they get to Charms.
She sits down beside Tasha, who gives her a sarcastic look. "Oh, now you get to sit with me again?"
"Don't," she says tiredly.
"Seriously, girl, what's your deal with her?"
"Nothing." Then, a little churlishly, "We're friends."
Tasha makes a skeptical snorting sound. "Since when?"
"Since the first day, on the train."
"Uh, the train yesterday?"
"No. The first first day. When we came to Hogwarts." Tasha is still giving her a skeptical look, so Piper sighs and admits, "And then mostly not since then."
Tasha waits for more, but there's both too much and not enough left to explain. Finally, Tasha just shrugs. "I mean, you do whatever, Pipe."
"Really? You're not gonna warn me to be careful?"
"Hey, I know she never hexed anyone without a wand. From what I've seen, you're the dangerous one." That makes Piper smile a little, and then Tasha adds, "And I'm in no position to give a shit who anybody's father is. I'm not a big fan of Slytherins, but if you say she's cool."
"She really is." Really, really.
Alex floats on that Transfiguration class for the rest of the day. She knows it's a bit pathetic, that Piper sitting with her in class and then agreeing to a study session is such a big deal, but whatever. She's just glad the disaster of the train ride had apparently worked after all.
Piper comes over to the Slytherin table toward the end of dinner when people are starting to trickle out of the Great Hall. She smiles at Alex, but she's unmistakably nervous, like she's venturing into hostile territory. It makes Alex smirk; she'll have to let Piper know that talking to her will essentially render a person invisible to the Slytherins. Other than the Quidditch team, completely ignoring her existence has been the strategy for Alex's housemates since she supposedly hexed Doggett. It's a preferable existence.
Alex lets Piper off the hook, though, standing up and nodding toward the entrance to the Great Hall. "Ready to go?"
Piper nods gratefully, grabbing a bag that seems packed with spell books and falling into step beside her, walking in amiable silence.
"Pipe!" They're nearly out of the huge room when the voice hits them, and Alex turns around to see a little boy who definitely has to be a first year nearly tripping over his robes as he comes up to Piper. "Hey!"
Piper's whole face relaxes and softens when she smiles at him, and warmth swells in Alex's chest. "Hey buddy." Piper ruffles his hair. "How was your first day?"
"Awesome," he says earnestly. "I turned a match into a needle. It was badass."
"Cal," she admonishes, biting back a smile. She seems to remember Alex then, turning to smile fully at her. "Alex, this is my little brother. Cal, this is my friend Alex."
It makes Alex stupid happy to be introduced that way, even if it is to an eleven year old who has no idea who she is yet.
Still, Cal is giving her a unabashed once over. "You're a Slytherin."
"Cal!"
Alex grins, parroting back, "And you're a Gryffindor." She slides her eyes to meet Piper's, arching an eyebrow in genuine surprise.
Cal puffs his chest out proudly. "I know."
"Guess that makes us rivals," Alex jokes with a smirk.
His eyes flash a happy challenge. "Do you play Quidditch?"
"Yeah, I'm a Beater."
"Really? I didn't know girls played that position."
Piper thwacks him on the back of the head for that.
"Hey!"
"Watch it. Alex is really good."
"She's right, I am," Alex assures him with a wink.
Cal grins back, and then Piper says, "Cal, we're going to do some work in the library, okay? I'll see you later. Do your homework."
He rolls his eyes. "Gee, thanks, Mom."
He trots off, and Piper and Alex continue on their way out of the Great Hall, Alex throwing Piper a curious look. "So. Your brother's a Gryffindor."
"Yeah, I know. First non-Ravenclaw in the family."
"Wow. I should pay more attention during the Sortings, I miss out on family scandals."
"Merlin, I'm dreading hearing from my parents. No idea what they're gonna say to Cal...no one ever got a Howler over their sorting, right?"
"I wouldn't be surprised. He doesn't seem bummed, though."
"Oh, no, the opposite. He wanted to be in a different house. Didn't even care which one. He doesn't care what our parents think...kinda likes doing his own thing." Off Alex's amused, pointed look, she laughs softly and adds, "Yeah, we're...really different."
Alex flashes her a smile. "Obviously." Alex starts toward a swiveling staircase that will take them toward the library, but Piper tugs her elbow in the other direction.
"If we're doing spellwork we should find an empty classroom."
"Oh, right."
They settle into the first empty room they come across. Alex perches on the edge of a table, twirling her wand idly between her fingers as Piper unpacks a variety of random objects from her bag. Then, rather than pull out her own wand, she sits down in a chair and pulls out her book and opens it to a marked page.
"What are you doing?"
"Re-reading the theory."
Alex rolls her eyes and reaches over the close the book over Piper's fingers. "Knowing you, you've memorized the theory already. Reading it one more time won't help."
Piper scowls, but she also slides her fingers from between the books pages and stands up, pulling out her wand. After a moment, though, she throws Alex a look. "Knowing me?"
Alex raises an eyebrow. "Am I wrong?"
"Well. No."
Her expression turns smug. "See?"
They practice for awhile, the only words the frequently repeated spell. Alex is managing the spell, but only two out three times, so she doesn't offer any tips.
After nearly ten minutes of work, Alex comments, "They should teach us to Conjure before they teach us to Vanish."
"Conjuring's more difficult," Piper mutters distractedly.
"Yeah but it's hard to practice Vanishing because if you're doing it right, you run out of shit to vanish."
Piper bursts out laughing, her whole face scrunching adorably when she does, and as soon as the laugh fades, Alex grabs her shoulders and turns her toward the row of objects. "Go ahead, do it now."
Startled, Piper obeys anyway, aiming her wand and blurting out, "Evanesco!"
The tissue she's aiming at disappears, and Piper lets out a yelp of delight.
Alex grins, triumphant. "I thought so. You get to a certain point and you're overthinking it."
Piper meets Alex's eyes, her smile tilting. "Guess you do know me."
Alex flicks her eyebrows. "Told ya."
Slowly, Piper's smile fades a little into an almost puzzled expression, her eyes digging into Alex's face like she's searching for something. "How is that?"
"What?"
"We had one conversation with actual substance, and we were eleven. So. Why is it you know me?"
Alex starts to say something snarky, but the look on Piper's face cuts off the instinct, and suddenly the air between them turns serious. Alex shifts her weight, feeling oddly uncomfortable. "I haven't made any major revelations here, Pipes."
Piper reacts, barely, to the nickname, not the first time Alex has used it, but then presses on, "I mean it. I've lived in the same room as some of my other friends for four years, and none of them thought anything about my brother getting into Gryffindor - "
"You told me on the train that your whole family was in Ravenclaw - "
"And you've helped me before, with spells. You know what I'm doing wrong."
"We've had classes together for four years."
"I've had more classes with Tasha for four years. And the other Ravenclaws."
Alex starts pointlessly rearranging the objects in a row. "Okay...what's your point, Pipes?"
Piper makes a smug, so there sort of face. "So. You've been paying attention. Which means you like me, too. You want to be my friend."
It takes Alex a second to realize Piper is referring to what she said yesterday, on the train. Then, Alex lifts her face to look at Piper, and immediately Piper's victorious smile drops completely. "I do," Alex says quietly. "I never pretended not to."
Piper's face flushes, and she jerks her gaze away from Alex's.
The silence that settles then is awkward, for the first time. Alex finally breaks it by pointing a wand and absently muttering the incantation, vanishing a cracked ink bottle. Piper follows her lead, repeating the spell. It takes her two tries but then she succeeds again. They work side by side until all the objects are gone.
Alex watches Piper vanish the last thing, an earring that she's guessing was missing a match. Alex nods. "Nice."
"Guess I don't need you making me laugh every time."
"Once you know you can do it once, you usually don't have trouble," Alex explains without thinking, instantly regretting it. Probably best not to keep demonstrating how much attention she's paid to Piper over the last four years of sharing a few classes.
"Well," Piper says finally, stuffing the forgotten spell book back in her bag. "Thanks."
"Sure." Alex cracks a smile, joking, "Want me to walk you home?"
Piper smiles back and nods. They leave together, and true to her word, Alex heads toward Ravenclaw Tower. They don't talk, and it feels like a heavy, waiting quiet: like Piper's working toward saying something. As soon as she thinks that, Alex has to wonder herself about where her instincts with Piper come from. Not all of them can be chalked up to simply observing from across rooms, even if Alex had done a fair bit of that.
Sure enough, as soon as the bottom of Ravenclaw Tower's spiral staircase is within view, Piper turns to her and blurts out, "We can be friends now, right? Like. Real ones?"
It would be a good time to play hard to get, remind Piper that she was always the one stopping that from happening, but Alex doesn't have it in her. She wants this too much, and she can't keep hold of the smile spreading across her face.
"If you want."
"I do."
"You always did."
"Yeah. But..."
"I know."
"Okay."
"Okay."
"Friends?"
"You need to shake on it?"
Alex extends her hand sardonically, and Piper playfully shoves it away.
"You don't have to walk me up the stairs."
"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Definitely."
"Goodnight, Piper."
"Night, Alex."
Alex doesn't stop smiling the whole walk back to the Slytherin common room. Today felt like magic.
It isn't until she's retreated into her dormitory, drawn the curtains around her bed and cast her usual spell to block out noise from outside, that any sort of darkness seeps into Alex's good mood. She remembers what she saw in the mirror when she was thirteen, the very last time she'd gone looking for it, as though staying away from the thing that showed her strongest desires meant those desires would disappear.
No. She's not going to go there.
Pathetic or not, this is the best day Alex has had at this damn school in all four years she's been here. Better than the first time she flew, the day she figured out how to appreciate her magic, the day she made the Quidditch team. This day kicked those days' asses.
So Alex is going to take it, and she's not going to ruin it by wishing for more.
She and Piper are friends. Before any of the rest of it, that is what Alex wanted.
For the first few weeks of term, Alex kind of keeps waiting for it to go away. But it doesn't.
Piper sits with her in the few classes they have together. They do homework together in the library, sometimes, and even lounge outside the grounds a few times during free periods.
The first Hogsmeade weekend comes, and though Piper walks over with her usual group of Ravenclaw friends, plus Poussey and a few other Hufflepuffs, she leaves them after an hour or two and meets Alex in the Three Broomsticks.
One thing Piper doesn't do is invite Alex to hang out with her other friends. She keeps her entirely separated, and while Alex is well aware that the implications of that aren't great, it's hard to get too worked up over it: she likes hanging out with Piper one on one.
"Give it back!"
"What's the matter, Willick, don't want anyone reading your little diary?"
"Jump a little higher, mate, we're not even making this hard!"
"Stop."
"If you weren't such a little Squib you could use your wand to get it down - "
"HEY."
Alex's voice cuts through the sound of taunting and laughter in the corridor as she and Piper patrol the hall together. Two third year Gryffindor boys have their wands whipped out, keeping a book moving aloft between the two of them, while a tearful, red faced second year jumps for it.
Alex gets there first, Piper behind her, and Alex moves her hair behind her shoulder, making sure her prefect badge is visible, but it's not necessary. The cluster of younger kids have gone dead quiet at her present, and Alex flicks her wand and the book comes zooming into her hand. "Ten points from Gryffindor, each," she says harshly. "No one likes bullies." She points her wand at one of them, just for emphasis, but the boy in question lets out a frightened yelp and dashes away, the other at his heels.
Rolling her eyes, Alex holds out the book to the smaller boy. He reaches out, his hand trembling, and doesn't move any closer to her then he needs to. "You okay?"
He nods mutely, but he's clearly afraid to look Alex in the eye, and turns to go the second the book is in his hand.
"Hey, stop running."
The little boy freezes, turning around, trepidation swirling in his eyes. Alex walks up to him, arms folded, one eyebrow arched. "I just saved you from those punk assholes. Why are you so scared of me?"
"Alex..." Piper murmurs from behind her, half-amused, half-admonishing.
Ignoring her, Alex waves an impatient hand at the kid. "C'mon, you gotta answer, I'm a prefect."
"I, uh..."
Piper steps in front of her, addressing the boy sympathetically. "You can go."
"Thanks, miss!" He runs off, relieved. Piper gives Alex a look.
Alex shrugs, unapologetic. "This is your fault. You gave me this reputation."
"Not all of it," Piper shoots back, then makes a scrunchy, regretful face. "Sorry."
"Harsh, but true."
"Makes you an effective prefect, though."
"Yeah I'm pretty sure that's why they gave it to me."
Most of the Ravenclaws give up prodding Piper about her friendship with Alex after the first few weeks, and Tasha and Poussey, though continually curious, are never particularly judgmental about it.
Still, for most of Hogwarts, attitude toward Alex hasn't changed. The Doggett incident isn't talked about much anymore, but the conclusions drawn from it persist, and it's generally accepted that Alex is into dangerous, dark magic, a tendency inherited from her Death Eater father.
There has been a change, in fifth year, besides Piper's newly overt friendship. The boys, fifth year and older, start to try to approach Alex, like they haven't badmouthed or ignored her for years. They treat it almost like a dare, wanting to get close to the danger and darkness.
Piper sees boys talking to Alex a few times, and though the conversations never seem to last long, and Alex never mentions any of them, it always pisses Piper off and puts her in a foul mood for hours at a time.
Once, at a Quidditch match just before Christmas, Slytherin versus Hufflepuff, Piper's in the stands with Tasha and Poussey, and most of the Ravenclaw boys from their year have ended up behind them. On the pitch, a Bludger aimed by Alex sends a Hufflepuff Chaser spinning off course, preventing a goal, and Piper grins even as Poussey groans dramatically beside her.
A few seconds later, she hears Alex's name from behind her. Her shoulders stiffen, but she doesn't turn around, just stares straight ahead and listens to Joel Luschek regaling Larry Bloom and the others with a supposed encounter with Alex in the Room of Requirement, where apparently he discovered a bed, ready and waiting.
Piper realizes she's grinding her teeth when a pulsing ache starts up in her jaw. Her fists are bunched around material of her robes, and her eyes are wild. She can feel Poussey watching her, and Piper tries to calm herself down because she is at least eighty percent sure he's making this shit up.
"Have you kissed Joel Luschek?"
Alex makes a loud, spluttering sound, her head jerking up to look at Piper and managing to look both disgusted and amused. "What?"
They're on the Hogwarts Express, heading home for the Christmas holidays, and Piper hadn't really meant to say that.
They're sitting on the same side of the compartment, Alex leaning against the wall by the window, Piper leaning against the wall by the door, knees drawn up, feet beside each other in the middle. And Alex is looking at Piper like she's insane.
"He said you made out." He'd said more than that, but Piper doesn't even want to go into it.
"Um. No. First of all, Joel Luschek's a prick. Second of all, I don't make out with guys." Alex says it casually, not like she's revealing something, but the new information reverberates through Piper's body anyway. Oblivious, Alex continues, "I mean, I guess technically, I don't make out with anyone. At the moment. But. If I were..." She shrugs.
"Oh." Piper nods for a long time. "Cool."
At the least cool sounding declaration of cool ever, Alex looks up, smirking. "Why?"
"Just wondering."
"Uh-huh," Alex says, but she says it smugly. After a moment, she asks casually, "Have you kissed Larry Bloom?"
"I. Just, um. He kissed me at the Yule Ball last year."
"Oh."
"But never since."
"Cool."
When they've fetched their stuff from the prefects' carriage, Alex taps her knuckles gently against Piper's elbow. "Have a good holiday."
"Yeah, you, too. I'll see you in a few weeks."
They smile, almost questioning, like both of them want to say more, but suddenly Cal comes running up, dragging his bag behind him and seizes the back of Piper's robes. "Pipe, come on, I'm not dealing with them alone, you gotta run interference."
Alex laughs and Piper rolls her eyes, giving Alex one last smile before letting her little brother pull her away.
Alex feels it when she leaves, a dull thud in her chest like the anticipation of missing her, but then Alex moves off the train and starts scanning the crowd for her mom, breaking into a grin as she spots Diane in the crowd.
"Mom!" She waves before running over and into her mom's waiting arms.
"Hey, baby!" Diane holds her tight, familiar fingers stroking Alex's hair. She draws back to look her, smiling widely. "It's so damn good to see you."
"You, too. Let's go home."
As they're walking off the platform, Alex catches Piper's eye across the platform - standing next to her parents and older brother, all of whom seem to be focused on Cal at the moment - and Alex lifts her hand in a wave. Piper waves back.
Her mom follows Alex's gaze. "Is that Piper?"
"Yeah."
Diane bumps her shoulder against Alex's. "I don't get to meet her?"
"No."
"Oh, c'mon, I want to meet your best friend...and I want to meet a real witch."
"Hello? I'm a real witch."
"Well, I've known that since you were two years old, babe."
The Christmas holiday feels longer this year than it ever has, and Piper's excited and relieved when it's time to return to Hogwarts.
She looks for Alex in the crowd of the platform but doesn't see her, so Piper tells her parents goodbye fairly quickly and heads to the prefects carriage, but Alex isn't there yet, either.
She's stowing her trunk when Piper feels a tug on her robes, and she spins around to see Alex grinning at her. Piper's so happy to see her she hugs her without thinking, the first time they've done that.
"Nice to see you, too, Pipes," Alex snarks in her ear, amused, before pulling back and grabbing hold of her wrist. "C'mon, my mom wants to meet you before we leave."
"Really?!" Piper's smile widens. Alex talks about her mom all the time.
"Yeah, but one thing..." Alex stops, hesitant. "Don't mention my father or anything, okay?"
"Merlin, why would I bring that up?"
"I don't know. You wouldn't. Sorry, it's stupid, just...she doesn't know. So I get nervous, when she's here."
"Okay," Piper nods assuringly, but she frowns slightly to herself as soon as Alex turns to tug her back into the throng of people on the platform. If Alex's mom doesn't know about Lee Burley's reputation in the wizarding world, she probably doesn't know how her daughter gets treated at school because of it.
"Mom! This is Piper," Alex is saying as they approach a pretty woman wearing blue eye shadow and a waitress uniform under her coat.
Piper smiles politely and sticks out her hand. "Nice to meet you, Ms. Vause."
Alex's mom grins at her, shaking her hand and then pulling her into a quick hug. "Call me Diane. Nice to finally meet you, too. Can't believe it's taken this many years."
Piper slides a glance at Alex without thinking; Alex's face is red, and she's avoiding Piper's eyes, and it clues Piper in. She turns back to Diane and smiles, smoothly replying, "Alex talks about you all the time."
Diane winks. "You, too, honey."
"Okay," Alex cuts in loudly. "Mom, we gotta go. Patrols and stuff."
"Oh, right, fancy prefects. Don't let me keep you." She hugs Alex, long and hard, then kisses the side of her head. "Love you, babe."
"Love you, too," Alex gives her a strained smile that makes Piper sad for her. She remembers Alex telling her once that she always hates leaving her mom alone.
"Have a good term. You, too, Pipe."
"Nice meeting you," Piper says again, smiling at Diane one more time before she and Alex head back onto the train.
Their work load only increases in the second half of the school year, and with O.W.L.s bearing down, Piper has turned into a live wire of buzzing anxiety that only Alex has occasional success in calming.
Even she can't do much about Piper's state of mind once the fifth years are scheduled for career advice meetings, just after Easter. Piper spends the long weekend pouring over leaflets for various careers, and the N.E.W.T level classes required for each one. Alex mainly tunes her out as she reads aloud the various qualifications, just chiming in occasionally to reiterate how strange she finds it that so much of their futures depend on what classes they choose to take at age sixteen.
"What do you think you want to be then?" Piper prods, probably to distract herself from her own uncertainty. "You're a Slytherin, aren't you supposed to be super ambitious?"
"Oh, I've got ambition," Alex replies lazily. "Just not very specific, yet."
"You'd be a good Auror," Piper tells her, trying to shove a pamphlet across the library table. "You're so good at Defense and Transfiguration..."
Alex looks up from her Potions essay to shoot Piper a sarcastic look. "Oh, sure the Aurors would love me. Daughter of a Death Eater, who may or may not still be alive...I could hunt him down and they'd make a movie."
"I don't think it would matter," Piper insists. "Have you heard of Nymphadora Tonks?"
They'd just studied the Second War in History of Magic. "She was the niece of Death Eaters. Bit more leeway there. Besides," Alex adds darkly. "Didn't her aunt kill her for her trouble? Not exactly inspiring."
"Fine," Piper takes the leaflet back, wisely moving on. "What about a professor? You could come back here and teach."
Alex makes a scoffing sound at that, but more amused than annoyed this time. "Right. I'd end up killing a student out of annoyance."
"Oh, c'mon. You're always so good at helping me understand practical spells...and you're really patient."
Alex glances up and grins at her. "Yeah, well, not everyone's as cute as you are, Pipes. Makes me more tolerant." She returns to her essay, doesn't let the comment linger, but Piper's skin heats up, instantly, in a not altogether unpleasant way.
Slytherin is playing Ravenclaw for the Quidditch Final, a fact Alex is delighted by until, after a week of trying, she has to accept that Piper isn't invested enough in the sport - or, these days, general house pride - to be any fun to trash talk.
"I don't see how any of you are so concerned with a game when we've got O.W.L.s coming up."
"Merlin, no sense of fun anymore." Alex sighs wistfully. "These tests have changed you."
But it is kind of hard to keep up with studying on top of marathon Quidditch practices, and Janae gets her fair share of grumbling from the three players on the team who are either fifth or seventh years - even though she herself is taking N.E.W.T.s, though she's already being scouted for professional Quidditch teams, so perhaps her lack of focus on academics is understandable.
Still, Alex is pumped for the match. They've come in second for the Cup the last two years she's played, and she wants a win - especially since she's not entirely certain she won't be cut from the team next year, depending on who succeeds Janae as Captain.
It hasn't been her best season. The Beater she'd played with the last two years had graduated last year, and she's been working with Leanne Taylor, who in spite of being a fourth year, is tight with Tiffany Doggett, which means she hates Alex even more than most people.
So Alex has taken team work out of the equation, and been pretty impressive, considering. She'd tried talking to Janae on multiple occasions about replacing her partner, once even explaining to her that most Muggle sports have extra players they can bring in as subs, in case anyone is having an off day and not playing well, but the Quidditch captain had just given Alex an appalled look, as if she was suggesting Janae herself spend a single game minute off the pitch.
Slytherin has to win by at least two hundred and ten points to win the Cup, which adds more strategy than is typical, as well as puts more pressure on the non-Seeker members of the team.
The morning of the Quidditch Final, Piper dutifully dons as much blue and bronze as is possible with her robes and, at Tasha's somewhat exasperated insistences, leaves her books behind in the dorm. A few other Ravenclaws make sarcastic comments during breakfast - "was half expecting you to show up in green, Chapman" - but they all walk a thin line between joking and genuine malice, so she lets it go.
Truthfully, Piper is hoping Alex wins.
To that end, when she finishes eating, Piper walks over to the end of the Slytherin table where the team is congregated for breakfast in a cluster of green robes. Her own house colors on display more than usual, Piper's immediately greeted by loud booing, which at least gets Alex's attention. She turns around and grins when she sees Piper, getting to her feet and moving away from the rest of the team. "You're awfully brave," she says with a smirk. "Crossing enemy lines."
Piper rolls her eyes. "I come in peace, I guess? Just wanted to say good luck."
Alex's eyes flash triumphantly. "Thanks, Pipes. And don't worry about sitting with your cronies. I know in my heart who you're supporting."
Piper laughs, but for some reason, she can feel her chest getting hot. The Slytherin Quidditch robes make Alex's eyes seem overly saturated, so green it's hard to hold her gaze. Piper's heard the Slytherin common room is bathed in green light; she wonders what Alex's eyes look like in there.
Now her pulse feels erratic and she's almost definitely blushing, and because Alex knows her so well, she tilts her head, questioning. "You nervous about something?"
"Oh, you know me...O.W.L.s."
"Geez, kid. Give yourself a two hour break." She playfully flicks the thing blue and bronze scarf hanging over Piper's shoulders. "Just relax and watch me sully your colors."
It is a nail biter of a game, and Piper even finds herself genuinely paying attention to the action. Usually, individual Quidditch games bore her: you can essentially just tune in when the Snitch is spotted. But the score is of more immediate importance here, which makes everything seem more relevant.
The Ravenclaw Chasers are probably a better unit, but Janae is the best player on the pitch, dominating the offense with the other two supporting her. Alex is the best Beater playing, easily, protecting her Chasers and preventing many Ravenclaw goals, allowing Slytherin to gain and maintain a decent lead.
Leanne, though, is giving Alex nothing to work with, being even more blatant this game than she's been all season in freezing Alex out, taking wild, rogue shots rather than pass the Bludger to Alex at a better angle. Janae is openly yelling at her, Piper can hear it even in the stands, but Leanne seems unbothered.
The score keeps slipping between Slythern being sixty or seventy up - enough of a lead to catch the Snitch and win the cup - and forty or fifty.
They're ahead by sixty when the Slytherin Seeker, Martiza, goes into a sudden nosedive. The Ravenclaw Seeker is nowhere near her, and Piper's section of the stands breaks into moans of dread and anger as she streaks toward the easy win.
Piper turns her attention to Alex, pulling up short as the attention of all the Chasers turn toward the other end of the pitch. Alex lets go of her and sits up, just hovering there, a grin on her face just as Madame Figueroa blows a whistle to end the match.
Cheers erupt from the Slytherin section, and at the same moment Leanne, seemingly unaware that play has stopped, finally decides to pass a Bludger in Alex's direction.
It slams into her back, toppling her off her broom.
She falls.
All the way down.
"ALEX!" Piper's anguished, terrified scream rips out of her throat, and it silences the crowd around her.
She wakes up in the hospital wing.
Her shoulder feels strangely buoyant, weird enough that it's the first thing Alex notices, but it doesn't hurt. All the hurt seems to be stored in her head. It hurts to open her eyes, and she lets out a quiet whine of realization, sinking further back into the pillows.
"Alex?" a quiet, familiar voice prods from right beside her, and Alex presses a hand to her forehead before braving the dim light of the infirmary, opening her eyes and even turning her head so she can see Piper, sitting in a chair beside her bed, arms pillowed on the edge of the mattress.
Piper's hair is messy and her eyes are red, and for some reason the first thing Alex blurts out is, "You're not studying."
Piper gifts her with a patented what the fuck kind of look, then chooses to ignore that inane statement. "Do you remember what happened?"
"Bitch knocked me off my broom," Alex answers, gingerly lifting her arm, bending it at the elbow.
"Here...I'm supposed to give you this..." Piper passes over a bar of chocolate waiting from the bedside table.
Alex takes it gratefully, but rolls her eyes as she does. "You people and your chocolate."
"You broke bones in your arm. And a few ribs," Piper informs her. "They're healed already...but you still have a concussion, so Madame Pomphrey gave you a sleeping draught." Piper swallows hard, voice fading a little, "Even though you were already unconscious."
"Funny. Muggles try to keep you awake for a concussion," Alex says absently, still testing her newly healed bones as if she doesn't trust them. "Don't you think it's kind of messed up that we just keep all this healing stuff to ourselves? Most people have to at bare minimum wear casts for over a month when they break a bones. Sometimes even have surgery. And here we are just kind of..." She flicks a hand to indicate magic. "My mom broke her ankle a few years ago, stocking shelves at work...and they told her not to walk on it, but she couldn't take six weeks off work even without the extra medical bills. She was waiting tables for two months wearing one of those brace things, and it almost definitely didn't heal right. Isn't that fucked?" She looks at Piper expectantly, but she barely seems to be listening to Alex. "You don't think so?" Then, waving her fully functional hand in Piper's face. "Pipes?"
"You..." Piper's voice comes out weird, all strangled and wet. She shakes her head hard, then tries again. "You fell."
"I know. I was there."
"You fell...really far."
"I actually reached for my wand mid-air. Then realized I didn't have it. I wanted to do a cushioning charm or something."
"I think one of the professors must've slowed you down. Because otherwise..." Piper's chin trembles. "For a second I thought you were dead."
Her voice cracks, and it shakes Alex out of the strange, woke-up-in-the-Hospital-Wing numbness. "Hey..." She puts a hand on Piper's arm. "Hey. I'm okay." Piper nods sharply, but she's still blinking back tears. Alex smiles gently at her. "You didn't hex anyone did you?"
"No." Piper wipes the heel of her hand under her eyes. Alex feels her whole heart soften, and without thinking she lifts her hand off Piper's arm and skims it through her hair. Piper looks at her, but she doesn't seem taken aback by the gesture. She smiles weakly. "Sorry...you really are fine, it just...it scared me."
"Thanks for caring," Alex says simply, reluctantly withdrawing her hand.
"Are you okay? Does anything hurt?"
"Head."
"Here." Piper shoves the chocolate at Alex again.
"What time is it?"
"I'm not sure. Late, I think."
"Guess I missed the victory party. Leanne and I should have celebrated like the great team we are." Alex rolls her eyes. She's pissed, but she'll deal with that later. "You should go to bed, Pipes. You've still got class tomorrow...assume I'll be excused."
"I'm good here."
Piper stays all night, getting only a little bit of sleep with her head pillowed in her arms on the side of Alex's bed. She skips breakfast, too, then reluctantly heads off to class, seeming unfocused on studying and O.W.L.s for the first time in weeks. Alex jokes at one point that she got hurt just to make Piper talk about something else, but the comment earns her a dirty look and not even a hint of amusement.
Janae comes to visit between her own classes in the morning, bringing a piece of cake she'd saved from the victory party and plenty of insults toward Leanne, but she's obviously still riding high off the win, which makes her seem less sympathetic.
At one point, she hesitates and says, "Your little Ravenclaw girlfriend's a bit, uh...dramatic, huh?"
Alex doesn't mind the mistaken title, at all, but she doesn't think Piper would want that getting around. "She's not my girlfriend."
"Whatever. She lost her shit. Ran onto the Quidditch pitch." It's clear Janae considers that the height of disrespect. "Yelling at everyone. Dramatic as hell." She pauses. "And she was definitely acting like your girlfriend. "
Alex has to bite the inside of her cheek to stop from smiling inappropriately.