I jump from my seat and rush to the backroom door.
"What are you doing?" Ashton asks me. I freeze in my tracks.
"Oh nothing I...was..just...I was going to the backroom but I decided not to." I whisper.
He looks at me confused but he just smiles. "Why are you whispering?" he asks, mimicking my whisper.
"Because I like to whisper." I say, still whispering. The truth was I was whispering because I didn't want Calum and Luke to know I was listening in on their conversation.
"Okay well uuhhh..." he giggles, "Michael and I are going to eat some lunch in the kitchen do you want to join us?" he asks.
"No I'm not very hungry, I just ate. I'm just gonna relax for a few minutes." I say leaning up and kissing him. He kisses me back and walks off to the kitchen. I lean my body against the back door and listen in to Luke and Calum's conversation.
"Luke calm down. what's wrong?" I hear Calum say along with a couple of sniffs from Luke.
"I just feel like such an idiot!" I hear Luke say loudly.
"Why? You have to tell someone Luke. I hate seeing you so not yourself."
There are a few moments of silence before Luke begins to talk. I hear him choke on his tears with every word. "I just wanted to see Ashton happy. But I didn't know it would hurt like this." Luke says. He pauses and continues. "I saw her in the crowd. I saw her looking at me. And she was so gorgeous and beautiful. And..." Luke pauses again and after a bit continues. "And I thought I could find a way to talk to her. After the show I saw her leaving the arena, somewhat confused, in the lot. I was nervous but somehow this girl I'd never met before made me smile and I wanted to go for it. But... But then I heard Ashton." he says.
"You heard Ashton what?" Calum asks with concern in his voice.
"I heard him talking to Michael about her. I listened in on them talking and... I don't know, suddenly the idea of being with her made me feel guilty. The thought of getting to know her made me feel selfish as if I was going to take away happiness from Ashton and I didn't want that. I felt like seeing his happiness amounted over my own and that everything would be okay in the end." Luke says. I felt my heart sink. I don't know what to feel.
"Lu-" Calum begins but Luke cuts him off.
"It was fine at first. They weren't serious. How could I've imagined they'd end up here getting physical and saying I love you and me being this awful person. I made the mistake of letting myself fall in love with her as he did. I-" I hear Luke choke on his failed attempts to hide the fact that he's crying. "It just hurts. It hurts to love her." Then all I hear is crying. Oh god.
"Luke you have to tell Dani." Calum says. A bit to late for that Calum.
"No. I can't! I can't! Don't you see Calum! My happiness doesn't matter! What matters is them!" he shouts as if he was stating a fact. "It hurts but it's-"
"Luke you have to stop putting others ahead of yourself." Calum says.
I fall down to my knees and feel pain in my chest. I did this. I'm making him feel like this.
"Nothing I do will fix anything. I just have to love her in silence." Luke says.
"I promise I won't tell anyone. Just know I'm on your side Luke." Calum says as I hear footsteps coming towards the door. I quickly jump onto the bunk next to me and pretend to look occupied. Calum looks at me with frustration in his eyes. Not like he was mad at me, he's just mad about the situation I assume... right?
"Everything okay Cal?" Ashton shouts from the kitchen.
"Yeah everything's good!" Calum says forcing a smile on his and running to the kitchen. I wait until they're all looking away and open the door to the backroom. I see Luke sitting there with his head in his hands and tears dripping from his fingers. The tips of his blonde hair wet from tears.
"Luke?" I say with a choke in my voice. He looks up at me. His blue eyes seemed deeper, deeper from regret and frustration. "I can't believe you did that." I whisper.
"Wha-what?" He asks stuttering, clearly trying to play dumb.
I walk over to him and hug him tightly. At first he's just limp in my arms, but soon wraps his arms around me and balls his hands into fists in my sweater. "I'm so sorry." I whisper.
He snuggles his head into my neck and takes a deep breath. He's no longer crying but his face is still wet. "It's ok." He says, pulling away, wiping away a stray tear.
"No it's not. This entire time I've been mad at you because I thought you were going to destroy our relationship, but in reality I should be thanking you. You gave up your own happiness for Ashton." I pause and think a moment. "Why?"
He sniffs. "He wasn't going through a good time. People were saying things and I thought if he could find someone to talk to, he'd be happy."
I smile at him. "Thank you. And I know you probably regret it now but you saved him. You cared for him and I can never thank you enough. Thank you Luke." I say. I kiss him on the cheek and hug him again. I pull back and see his face has turned a bright red colour. I decide to ignore it for now. "This is good! Now we can tell Ashton and he doesn't have to be so rude about it all the time! You can go back to being best friends a-"
"No. We can't tell him." Luke says sternly.
I stare at him, confused. "Why not? If you tell him then you'll be friends again, isn't that what you want?"
"Yes, but I'd rather have you." He says quietly.
I sigh and look down. "Look, Luke we've been over this, I will never leave-"
"Me." A voice says behind me. I turn around and see Ashton at the door. His eyebrows are furrowed as he's assessing the situation. "Hi." He says emotionlessly, walking towards me and kissing me quickly before turning his attention back to Luke. "Are you ok Luke? You look like you were crying." Ashton says without any real emotion. He's trying though, so that does mean something. "What are you two doing?" He asks me.
"Oh, we were just talking. Luke actually has som-"
"We were talking about how to fix the magazine issue." Luke says, smoothly changing the subject.
"Oh, then why are you crying?" Ashton asks. Luke struggles to find the right words and looks at me.
I sigh. "He's still a little frustrated about it. He feels bad that he's ruined this up and he's afraid you two will stop being friends." I cut in for him. He nods a thank you and Ashton lifts an eyebrow suspiciously.
"Well it's not your fault mate." He says patting Luke's shoulder. "Well, not completely anyway." Ashton sits down next to me and puts his arm around my shoulder. "So, did you two come up with anything?" Luke and I don't say anything. "Come one you two have been in here for who knows how long talking about god knows what and you're telling me you haven't thought of anything?" Ashton says with humour in his voice.
"Our interview." Luke mumbles.
"Yeah your interview!" I repeat. Good idea Luke. "Don't you guys have one in Vegas right before the show?" I ask.
"Well yeah but-"
"So we'll find a way to address the issue in the interview. Chances are the interviewer already knows, and we'll turn things around there." Luke says.
Ashton smiles, knowing that we can solve this.
"Sounds like a plan." I say as I get up from the couch. Calum and Michael come in and sit around Luke as they begin to chat. Ashton leads us out of the room. The two of us then sit down on a bunk.
"I'm happy we found a solution but what were you two really talking about?" Ashton asks, his hazel eyes piercing through me. We always knew when the other one was lying. It was nice when he was the one lying, well it wasn't nice when he was lying but when I could catch him in the lie. But it's frustrating as ever when I am the one caught lying.
"I think it's best if Luke tells you himself." I say resting my head on his shoulder. He runs his fingers through my hair.
"Well then I'll go ask him" Ashton says as he starts to stand up. I quickly push him down.
"No. Luke will tell you when he's ready. It's better that way." I say as he gives me a glance. "Trust me." I say as I grab his cheeks and I pull him in to peck him on the lips, hopefully shutting him up. He grabs the back of my head and keeps me in longer than I was expecting. He puts his hands on my legs and starts moving them up my thighs. I just grab the back of his shirt and ball it in my hands. I'm not going to say I wasn't enjoying this.
He lets out a moan of happiness and for the first time since I got on the bus I knew everything was going to turn out okay. I'm not sure what Ashton will think when Luke tells him the truth. I'm not even sure if Luke will ever tell him, but that's in the future, and I am living in the moment. I hear laughter coming from the backroom and I smile underneath Ashton's kiss at the sound of it.
"I love you so much." I tell him.
"I love you to babe." He says as he places a final kiss on my forehead. He takes my hands into his and looks at me. "Will you come in with us?" He asks.
"Come in with you where?" I ask him back.
"Into the interview, just so I can see you. So I can see your happy face when we set this straight." He pauses and smiles at me. "And so I can kiss you because I don't think I can wait a whole interview to do that." Ashton smiles at me and I blush.
"Of course. I'll be with you no matter what. Everyday. Every step of the way." I giggle because of the rhyme. I wrap my arms around him and pull him in for a peck. We both look out the window to see the radio station in the distance. My hands become sweaty, but I know this is going to work.
Luke comes out of the backroom and places his hand on Ashton's shoulder. Luke and Ash look at each other with serious, yet friendly faces. "You ready?" Luke asks him. Ashton nods and gives my hand a squeeze as the bus comes to a stop.