Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing that you would recognize as the fantastic work of J.K. Rowling. I only take credit for those OC characters that appear here.
Warning: Chapter contains scenes of strong violence. The mature rating is there for a reason, please read at your own discretion.
February 1st, 1979
'I still don't understand why you both couldn't live with Moony and I.' said Sirius slightly grumpily.
James was using his wand to levitate boxes into the corner and after seeing that they were in the right spot he turned back to Sirius and grinned at him. 'We're getting married Padfoot and besides my mum wanted us to have this place.'
The two men looked around the large living room approvingly. Sirius had to admit it was a cosy and comfortable house that suited Lily and James well. He wouldn't admit that he was a little more than disappointed that James was moving out of his place.
'Yeah I know Prongs.' He said as Fabian, Gideon, Peter and Lily came into the room.
'You two having a nice break while we do all the heavy lifting?' said Gideon jokingly.
'Har har, I think we've got everything now anyway.' Said Sirius scratching his head in thought.
'I think so too.' Said Lily happily and she was beaming around the place with excitement.
'Well all hope is lost!' Sirius announced. 'Lily's fallen in love with this place, you'll be stuck here until the day you die Prongs.'
The men laughed while Lily gave Sirius a moody look.
'Well if you don't need us we were thinking about heading out for a few drinks, anyone want to join us? Asked Fabian.
'No thanks, Lily and I are going to do some unpacking. Maybe get used to the place a little. You guys go ahead.' Said James with a slight glance at Lily.
Sirius noticed her blush slightly and knew exactly what James meant by "get used to the place". He tossed James a knowing look, and James pushed his glasses up and avoided his eye.
Sirius laughed, 'Sure, I'll come by tomorrow then. You two have fun.' He said, and winked at Lily who blushed even fiercer.
Sirius grinned and grabbed his jacket, leading the brothers and Peter towards the door with James following behind them to close the door. Sirius stopped and turned as the others took off towards the street and made a gesture with his hips at James who snapped the door shut on him as he barked with laughter from the other side.
James turned to find Lily watching him, shaking her head with a grin. 'I think he's really rather sad that you've moved out.' She said as James made his way over to her.
'He'll get over it.' Said James huskily as he wrapped his arms around Lily and pulled her close to him.
'I really hope he works things out with Eileen Grey, I'd like to see him happy too.' She said as James bent down and picked her up.
'I'm going to take you upstairs to our new bedroom now.' He said ignoring her comment.
Lily smirked at him. 'He's our best friend you should really do something to help him out.'
James continued to ignore her as he climbed the stairs. When they reached the bedroom, which at the moment held only their bed and an assortment of boxes, James pushed past one and dumped Lily unto the bed where she grinned up at him. He pulled his shirt up over his head and tossed it onto the floor next to him.
'I'm going to kiss you now and then I'm going to make love to you Lily Evans. In our new bed, in our new home.' Said James and Lily felt her blood rush as she watched him.
She considered continuing teasing him by not acknowledging what was about to happen but he pressed his lips to hers and the thought was gone and replaced with the taste and scent of James Potter.
No sooner had James really started kissing her a banging sounded from the door bellow. James broke the kiss and a low growling nose issued from the back of his throat that both surprised and excited her.
'If that is Padfoot I'm going to murder him.' Said James, grabbing his shirt as the pounding sounded again more frantically.
They exchanged a look and James slowly pulled his wand from his back pocket. Lily climbed off the bed and moved behind him. Her wand was still lying on the table downstairs.
They walked into the hallway and with his wand held tightly James walked down the stairs. He crossed the living room in a few strides and pulled the door open, aiming his wand at whoever was standing there.
'Merlin Prongs!' Remus looked anxious and startled and James instantly lowered his wand.
'Moony, what the hell? Were you trying to knock the door down?' said James, stepping aside to let Remus in.
'Sorry Prongs, where are the others?' Remus looked around as if expecting Sirius and Peter to be hiding somewhere. 'Moody sent me, we need help. A group of Death Eaters just showed up at Marlene's brother's house. She sent us a message and a few people took off to help!' Remus was slightly out of breath as he stood in front of them.
They stared at him for a second before Lily came pelting down the stairs and skidded to a halt behind James. James turned sharply, strode over to the table and grabbed Lily's wand as she shoved boots on her feet.
'Of course we're coming. Padfoot, Wormtail and the Prewett's aren't around. We will have to do.'
Remus nodded and in less than a minute the three of them were stepping out in the road of Godric's Hollow.
'Let's go.' Said James, his face set and his wand grasped tightly in his hand. He exchanged a brief look with Lily, each trying to tell each other they loved the other with only their eyes.
They turned on the spot and disaparated, reappearing in a field and surrounded by chaos.
Spells and curses were flying through the air marked by screaming, shouting and the shrill and piercing laugh of Bellatrix Lestrange. The Death Eaters outnumbered the Order members ten to seven but they were fighting back with everything they had. Frank and Alice Longbottom were taking on Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange and Bellatrix was taunting them with her laughter while still dueling to kill them. Her father and Lucius were a few yards to her left duelling Hector, all three with identical looks of hatred frozen on their faces. Marlene and her brother were taking both Dolohov and Nott and they went flying by Eileen as a curse soared past Marlene's shoulder. Dorcas Meadowes was standing with her back to Alastor Moody, duelling both Mucliber and Wilkes. Eileen was beside Rabastan, dueling Alastor Moody. The field in front of Ned McKinnon's house was a battlefield and the noise was deafening.
The ground behind Eileen was hit with a spell and she was blasted forward over Moody and into the middle of Dorcas's duel with Mulciber and Wilkes. She landed face down in the grass and for a moment the sounds around her were muffled as she struggled to get the air back into her lungs. Time seemed to move at a fraction of the speed it normally did for a moment as she lay there, her cheek pressed into the frost-bitten grass and she felt heavier than she ever had. People were running and moving all around her and she knew she had to get back up and join the fighters. Which side to join? The moment she aparated into the clearing with Rabastan she had felt the sickening sensation in her belly that filled her with an incredibly powerful sense of both recklessness and excited anxiety. She would hold her cover as long as she could but she could never forgive herself if anyone from the Order was hurt or worse. She didn't want to think about it and at last she gasped as the cool air filled her empty lungs and the chaotic nose returned in full force to her ears.
She forced herself up and immediately dove to the left as a hex few past her left ear. A slight popping nose sounded to the right of where she landed and she rolled to her feet, wand in hand, to see Lily, James and Remus apparate on to the field. She felt as if a slight weight lifted off her shoulders, the fight was now evenly matched, or at least slightly in the advantage of the Order as Eileen was with them. She wondered in that split second where Sirius was before Hector, Dougal and Malfoy flew by them, sending James and Remus into the fray. Lily was forced behind them and Eileen raised her wand, signalling for Lily to duel her. Getting the hint Lily sent a spell at her that she easily blocked. She wanted to give Lily a smile but the concern on her face made her resist.
With a sudden whoosh the house behind them went up in flames and Marlene and Ned let out noises of outrage. Hector was distracted for a brief moment by the flames and Lucius, taking the advantage, sent him flying across the field. What happened next seemed to happen both in slow motion and faster than anything she had ever witnessed. She turned to see Hector picking himself off the ground as Dougal pulled the sleeve of his robes up, revealing the dark mark imprinted on his arm. Her duel with Lily was forgotten as she watched in horror as her father pressed his finger to the mark, summoning Lord Voldemort. The battle around them continued as if nothing happened and Eileen turned back to Lily, wanting to warn her somehow but it was too late because Bellatrix let out a scream of delight that could only mean that Lord Voldemort had joined them.
Eileen wasn't the only one to realise that Voldemort had joined the fray. Lily had stopped dueling and was watching with horror as Voldemort engaged James. Moody abandoned his duel with Rabastan and was pelting towards Voldemort and James. Eileen was both mortified and impressed that James was taking on Voldemort and the pair was starting to draw more attention as James blocked another curse.
Before Eileen could react, Lily was pushing past her and running full speed towards them. Moody and Lily joined the duel at the same time, their wands flashing in the air with an intensity that Eileen had never seen.
She knew she ought to be doing something, or anything, but the sight of Voldemort arriving and dueling the Order members left her momentarily stunned. She watched as if from a distance as the three Order members dodged and blocked curse after curse, hardly being able to get anything other than a shield charm off. The house behind them burned on and it was Marlene McKinnon, flying sideways through the air that brought her back to the battlefield.
Marlene was getting up some feet away and Wilkes was lying face down in the grass, unmoving. She clutched her wand tighter and moved to where Remus and Mulciber were dueling, as fiercely as the others. She slid into place next to Mulciber, giving Remus the slightest nod before firing a curse over his left shoulder and into the hill behind him. She was keeping James and Lily in view and found herself appalled by Voldemort. His face was smooth and hairless, pale with slits for nostrils and the blood-red pupils of a snake. His whole appearance was disconcerting; tall with long pale fingers wrapped firmly around his wand he wore a look of complete hatred as he dueled James, Lily and Moody. James managed to send a curse closer to Voldemort than he had before and the result was immediate. Voldemort growled in anger and swiping his wand in a sweeping slash, Moody, Lily and James were sent backwards into the air, bringing down the dueling pair of Dougal and Malfoy. Hector seized the moment to stun Lucius but Dougal shoved Lily off him, jumping to his feet and screaming in anger as Hector took off in the opposite direction.
Voldemort did not hesitate and he twirled his wand and James, who was climbing to his feet, was suddenly forced back to the ground and was dragged back towards Voldemort. James was struggling with his invisible bounds but his arms were pinned to his side and he couldn't get his wand up to stop the movement. When he finally stopped, Voldemort studied him for a moment, his cold unfeeling eyes taking in James Potter. He raised his wand and Eileen heard Lily scream from some distance away and her heart seemed to leave her body as Voldemort pointed his wand down, his face snarled, to kill James.
No one else seemed to notice that James Potter was seconds away from death as the fight raged on around them, no end in sight. James was still fighting the bonds that held him but seemed to for a moment understand that he was going to die. His eyes peeled off Voldemort's face and found Lily, screaming and running towards him and Eileen knew exactly what she had to do. She turned away from Remus, who had with the sudden realisation of horror, noticed what was happening, and she jabbed her wand in the air, releasing James from the hold Voldemort had on him and as Voldemort flicked his cold gaze towards her she hit James square in the chest with a blasting curse and he was shot a few feet sideways as Voldemort's killing curse blasted the ground where James had been laying seconds before, leaving a small crater.
Lily reached James in a flash, Moody on her heels. 'FALL BACK! GET OUT! LEAVE!' Moody was shouting as Lily helped James to his feet.
He could barely be heard over the noise but Remus disarmed Mulicber and without a look back he took off towards James and Lily, stunning Rodolphus from behind. Dorcas grabbed hold of Marlene and Ned and in a flash they were gone.
Eileen was feet away from Voldemort, staring straight back into his eyes, unable to clear her mind and knowing without doubt that she was done, she could never go back. Saving James's life had guaranteed her death; the only question was how soon it would be. Without warning her mind was flooded with the images of her occlumency lessons with Dumbledore, the order meetings, Lily and James kissing after their engagement and Sirius. Sirius at Hogwarts, face covered in blood, under the cloak with her, in the owlery when he kissed her cheek. She tried to stop the intrusion of her memories but her wand was snatched from her hand by some invisible force. Sirius was back in front of her eyes, smiling and laughing and touching her and then they were there in that kitchen and the memory was something she was unwilling to share, something far too beautiful and now so heartbreaking because she would never see Sirius Black again, she would never kiss that irresistible, reckless, brave, storm of a man again and her heart hurt with the loss.
Her knees hit the grown as Voldemort released her mind and she was able to see the remaining Order members leaving, sending final stunning spells over their shoulders and Lily and James shouting and fighting with Moody who was urging them forward, away from her and finally taking them both by the arm, and giving Eileen a look of undeniable sadness and misery he forced them to disaparate alongside him.
'I am not surprised Grey. It seems the Grey family cannot produce children worthy of their blood status.' Voldemort's voice was low and cold as a few Death Eaters started making their way towards them, looks of confusion on their faces.
'My Lord?' Rabastan has joined them first, picking Eileen's wand out of the grass and looking from her to Voldemort.
'She is not worthy of you Lestrange, I would forget your desire for her.' Voldemort turned his eyes on Rabastan, a cruel humour playing in them.
Rabastan's eyes slid over her face and the look she found there was revulsion and something else that sent a chill down her spine. Bellatrix sauntered over to them, grinning wide and looking at Eileen as though she had finally got something long past owed to her.
'Little baby Grey finally showing her true colours?' Bellatrix laughed and flicked her wand, binding Eileen's hands behind her back.
'What is this?' Dougal and Lucius had made their way to the group, looking battered and confused. 'My Lord?' Dougal turned his questions to Voldemort but Lucius's eyes remained on her a mixed look of confirmation and indifference on his face.
'Ah Dougal, it seems your other child does not, after all, wish to join us.' Said Voldemort, waving his wand casually in her direction.
Dougal's eyes snapped back to her and she held his gaze, refusing to speak and silently asking him how he did not see this, how as her father he had been so blinded that he barely knew his child.
A muscle twitched in Dougal's temple but he turned his eyes away from her. 'Kill her then.'
Voldemort laughed a high, cold laugh. 'Always so neat Dougal, but I think not yet. Take her away, she is no concern to me any longer. Get what information you can from her and dispose of her how you like. Bella see to it.' He turned, sweeping his long cloak behind him. 'Come Dougal, I have something else for you to attend to.' Her father glanced back down at her, revulsion plain on his face.
'Do not kill her without me Bellatrix.' He said as Bellatrix bent down and took Eileen's face in her hand. He swept away after Voldemort, both of them stepping over the body of Wilkes without any regard for the dead Death Eater.
Bellatrix pulled her chin up so they were looking in each other's eyes. 'Won't take long to crack you love. Will it Rabastan?' Bellatrix was looking at her hungrily, her eyes dancing with the horrifying ideas in her head.
Eileen stared back at her, unwilling to break for them, they would have to kill her.
'Cat got your tongue Grey?' Rodolphus laughed. 'Let's go.' He said and someone grabbed her from behind, forcing her to stand.
'You can take her to my place, I've got a cellar we can through her in.' said Dolohov nastily.
The hands tugged her nearer and she realised it was Rabastan. She continued to look forward, trying not to think or feel because what was the point? Rabastan dug his nails into her arm and in a flash they disaparated from the field, reappearing in front of a small, dingy cottage in what looked like the middle of nowhere.
Small pops on either side of them announced the arrival of Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Dolohov and Lucius. She was dragged into the small house and thrown down against a wall. The only thing it contained with a small stained sofa and a dusty bookshelf that didn't hold any books. Part of her wanted to laugh; it was not surprising that Dolohov didn't own any books.
Rabastan kneeled next to her, bringing her back to her increasingly desperate situation. He pushed the strands of loose hair out of her face. He clutched her face roughly and she was sure his fingertips were bruising her.
'Should have known you were the spy you little bitch.' He pushed his mouth against hers and kissed her roughly, holding her in place while Bellatrix screamed with laughter behind them.
She felt the bile rise in her throat and it took everything not to vomit when he finally released her. Hatred, hot and vicious built inside her and she spat in Rabastan's face.
'Fuck!' he stumbled back slightly, looking disgusted but regained his balance and grabbed her hair in his fist pulling her to her feet.
'Put her in the cellar where she belongs, I think a girl talk is what she needs don't you Lucius?' said Bellatrix, practically skipping with glee as Rabastan forced her down a set of stairs.
When they reached the bottom Bellatrix conjured a single chair and Rabastan forced her into it, waving his wand and ropes shot out of it, binding her to the chair.
Bellatrix approached her with the look of a cat stalking its prey. 'It's about time you were given what you deserve you filthy blood traitor. CRUCIO!' Bellatrix shouted with delight and Eileen screamed as red hot fire filled her body and it was a pain she had never felt before. The world must surely have shattered because nothing else except that could surely cause the pain she felt ripping her apart. And then it stopped and she was panting and her eyes were wet from tears she didn't know had fallen.
Bellatrix grinned, 'Filthy blood traitor wants her boyfriend hmm?" Bellatrix crackled with laughter. 'SIRIUS! SIRIUS! Looking for my filthy cousin are you Grey?' Eileen felt a weight drop into her stomach, she must have screamed for him without realising it. Rabastan and Lucius were glowering from behind Bellatrix as she lifted her wand and cried again, "CRUCIO!'
'WE HAVE TO GO BACK!' James screamed the moment they appeared in front of Order Headquarters.
'We can't go back Potter!' Moody said but he looked like a man who had lost something irreplaceable.
'WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? WE CAN'T LEAVE HER THERE! HE WILL KILL HER!' James shrugged out of Lily's grasp and his face was a mask of fury.
The front door opened behind them and Sturgis Podmore emerged, closely followed by Remus who looked relieved to see them.
'Come inside James.' Sturgis said softly.
'I'M GOING BACK!' James snarled, paying no mind to Moody or Sturgis.
'You will not find anyone there I am afraid.' Sturgis continued as if they were talking about the weather.
His tone seemed to change James's mind and ignoring the others he stormed straight past Sturgis and Remus and into the house.
The kitchen was full of people. Hector was nursing a cut lip while Alice and Frank were embracing in the corner, too preoccupied with each other to notice the newcomers. Marlene and her brother looked stony faced but otherwise unharmed and Dorcas was being tended to by Emmeline. The other Order members were around the table, some standing while others sat. Sirius, Fabian, Gideon and Peter were still absent and for once James was okay with Sirius not being there.
He stormed into the room and all eyes turned to them as James paced back and forth near the window, his mind racing.
'James – ,' Lily approached him slowly, placing a hand on his shoulder. He stopped pacing and looked down at her. For a moment, one horrible moment he had actually thought that he would never see her again, that he would never smell her flowery scent again or run his thumb across her perfect lower lip. The thought made his stomach seize painfully and Eileen flashed into his mind as she blasted him out of the way of death. The look on her face as Moody pulled them away, on her knees in front of Voldemort, she looked like a woman who knew only too well that she was going to die.
'WE JUST LET HER DIE!' He bellowed and Hector dropped the glass he was holding, the smash echoing around the room.
'What?' He looked from Moody to James and back. 'Who died?'
Everyone turned to look at Hector as he stepped back and bumped into the cupboard behind him. He shook his head as if to clear it. 'No.'
'Hector you should sit down.' Moody said calmly and Hector sat, his face falling and Benji silently patted his back.
'There was nothing we could do James, absolutely nothing. None of us knew he would show up.' Moody ran a hand over his face, his new magical eye fixed on James.
'BULLSHIT! WE DIDN'T TRY! WE LEFT HER THERE TO DIE AND THAT-,' James's voice broke suddenly and his throat ached from screaming. He closed his eyes and pushed a hand through his hair. When he spoke again his voice was deadly calm and everyone was listening to him. 'I'd be dead. Dead right now if it wasn't for her and we didn't even try to save her. We just abandoned her to him, to them. I'm disgusted with myself. I'm disgusted with this Order. We failed her just now and that is our punishment. I'm here because of her and I get to live now knowing I didn't try to save her too. Eileen is dead. Hector your sister – she is dead.'
Hector looked up, his eyes red but dry. He locked eyes with James but remained silent.
'How do I tell Sirius? How to I tell my brother that Eileen is dead? That it's because we didn't stay to fight for her as she would have done – as she did for us. How do I tell Sirius the woman he loves is dead?' James stopped talking, emotion over taking him and he turned and found Lily's arms around him, keeping him standing.
'Eileen knew what she was doing when she joined the Order. She was brave and kind and self-sacrificing. She did not die in vain today.' Said Dorcas and everyone around the table looked at her.
'To Eileen.' Said Caradoc and with a flick of his wand glasses appeared around the table, full of a rose-coloured wine.
Everyone stepped forward or reached out and silently picked a glass off the table and held it in the air in front of them.
'She was a fierce fighter, whose bravery will never be forgotten. To Eileen Grey, a great witch and a truly remarkable person.' Elphais Doge finished.
They all drank from the cups, and when they were finished no one spoke. After a few minutes Hector rose and without saying a word he walked out of the kitchen and out the house, shutting the door silently behind him.
'Where is Sirius?' Said Remus finally and his question seemed to break the silence.
'The Three Broomsticks or The Leaky Cauldron? Fabian and Gideon are often at either one.' Said Marlene.
'We will go send them here, we'll check those spots before we go home.' Said Frank, clutching Alice's hand in his own.
'Thank you.' Said Moody. 'Take extra precaution. We do not want what happened at McKinnon's to happen again.'
The Longbottom's nodded and left without another word and James thought that perhaps they were both eager for only the company of each other. He longed to have Lily to himself now, back in their house but he knew that was the cowardly thing to do. He would have to face Sirius and he was going to have to tell him about Eileen even though the thought was ripping him apart. Lily forced him to sit and she embraced Remus briefly before they sat on either side of James, both silent, lost in their own thoughts.
It seemed like forever and no time at all until Sirius and the others arrived. Sirius rushed into the kitchen with Peter on his heels and they instantly looked relieved to find James, Lily and Remus sitting there unharmed.
'Bloody hell Prongs, what happened out there? Frank just told us to come back!" Sirius looked flushed slightly from drinking but James knew him well enough to know that he wasn't near intoxicated.
He tried to open his mouth but words wouldn't come and in an instant Sirius's face changed from relief to concern.
'What's wrong Prongs? Moony?' He looked around the table at the few faces left but no one would meet his eye except Lily and Remus.
'Padfoot -,' Remus started but James cut across him.
'Sirius, I'm so sorry.'
James watched as Sirius's face changed from confusion and concern to slight panic. 'Merlin, Sirius its Eileen.' James forced her name out and his heart sank as Sirius seemed to deflate in front of him.
He sank into a chair across from James, his eyes wide. 'Where is she?' he asked, his voice calm, not betraying the chaos that James knew must be taking place inside him.
'She's dead.' He said and he couldn't look in Sirius's eyes any longer because the familiar and ever present spark suddenly died and James wondered whether he would ever see it again and if he had just killed it with his words.
'How?' he said and his face was blank and emotionless and Remus made to stand but Lily motioned for him to stay.
James forced himself to look back at his best friend and Sirius's eyes were searching James's and asking questions that James wasn't prepared to answer. 'Voldemort. He was about to kill me and she just – she saved my life and I couldn't save hers.'
'He was about to kill you?' Sirius frowned, a small crease forming between his eyes.
'Yes.'
'She saved your life?'
'Yes.' James responded, each word painful.
Sirius stood abruptly, strode around the table and forcing James out of his chair he embraced him. 'God Prongs!' He said and Sirius's voice broke and James wrapped his arms around Sirius in return, wet, hot tears escaping his eyes and dripping down the back of Sirius's leather jacket.
'I'm so sorry.' He croaked, irritated by his own voice.
'Eileen is dead.' Said Sirius and he sounded like a man that was stating a lie and hoping to be challenged. Remus stood and joined their hug with Peter and Lily and the five of them hugged each other, and cried while the Order members around them silently left the room.
She sat in the chair, head hanging, still bound to it by the ropes Rabastan had cast. Bellatrix had removed her cloak and robes and left her sitting there, freezing, in an undershirt and jeans. Her head was pounding and she had long lost any sense of time or matter or even her body. The world was a painful, agonizing place and it was these dull, lifeless moments in between the pain and the questions when she let her mind go blank. Feeling only added to the hurting, and what was the point anyway, she had nothing left to feel for.
She supposed she hadn't been here any longer than a few days and she was starting to wonder when or if they were going to kill her. Bellatrix and Rabastan seemed to be enjoying keeping her alive, torturing her and asking her questions that she simply refused to answer. She had been silent since they arrived in this hell hole and her silence seemed to infuriate Bellatrix that much more. A small part of her was taking pleasure in knowing Bellatrix was seething and perhaps that is why she was still alive.
The thought brought a tiny bubble of laughter to her throat but it didn't escape her lips, least one of her captors hear and decide she needed to be questioned again. She might be alive, but barely, her heart was slow, as if it had stopped caring and merely was giving half an effort. She felt drowsy, maybe she could sleep? Probably not, the draft from the cellar window was cold and every time she felt sleep taking her the wind would blow frosty air against the exposed skin of her arms and back.
She shivered as another blast rattled her abused body. If only she could close that window and maybe she could rest a while until someone came back to torture her again. She could still remember the last winter at Hogwarts and it felt like it had happened a life time ago rather than a year. She used to climb to the highest tower and stare down into the snowy grounds until the wind or chill became too much and she would leave for the warmth of the library or her dorm. In one of these moments she had watched a group of boys make their way out into the snow, trudging along happily, no care for the cold air or their inevitably frozen and wet feet. They started a snow ball fight with their wands, ducking and diving and laughing like she had never heard people laugh before. She recognized them as the four Gryffindor boys who she had known since first year, James Potter, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black. They were always making trouble and none of Slytherin house liked them, but she did, in her own way. She didn't know them but she had admired their friendship and above all Sirius Black's way of defying his family through his place in Gryffindor. This was what lead her to him, she knew he was arrogant and bigheaded and perhaps a little too full of himself but she had seen him with his friends when no one else was watching and she had seen love there and caring and loyalty and thought maybe he would understand her, maybe he could help her.
Where was Sirius now? He hadn't been at the battle and maybe that was a good thing. She hoped he would be happy maybe, they never talked about what they had or what they wanted from it, everything had been too quick, not enough time. Never enough time to figure things out, she was always here or there but never where she wanted to be, with Sirius, in his arms, kissing him and making up for the months and weeks when she should have been only with him. She would do anything to steal back some of that time, to kiss him one more time before she died.
The wind blew another shiver up her spine and she looked towards the window, cursing it for being open. Her expression softened slightly as she looked at the window and wondered or hoped for the first time whether she might fit through it. Life seemed to seep back into her and her heart beat a little faster, warming her blood and bringing her back to herself. Her wand must be upstairs with Rabastan, it would be no use to her here. She pulled at her bonds and found them slightly less resistant than she thought they would be. If she could wiggle her wrist enough, she might be able to shift the bindings lose. They must have been worked lose during the use of the cruciatus curse.
She started moving them, a little at first and then more as she felt the rope digging into the skin of her wrists. The rope was burning her skin, and she was sure her wrists would be raw if she ever managed to get free. She managed to slip the rope up her hand but her thumb joint was getting in the way and she huffed in frustration. A small creak sounded from upstairs and she froze, listening harder than she had ever listened. She could hear the faint snores of either Rabastan or Mulciber but everything else was quiet.
The cellar was dark except for the crack of moonlight seeping through the open window. She wondered momentarily whether they had left it open hoping she would try to escape. Maybe her ropes were loosened intentionally and she was falling into another trap. She inhaled and exhaled, trying to regain her focus. It didn't matter, she had to try either way.
Her heart was racing and she felt warmer than she had before though the icy cold left her fingers numb and aching against the ropes. There was no other option, she would have to pop her thumb out of joint to get it past the ropes. She had done it once before accidentally during Quidditch practise in fifth year and had popped it back herself, receiving a slight lecture from the matron but it wasn't terribly painful. Besides, it couldn't be worse than the hell Bellatrix, Rabastan, Rodolphus and Mulciber had been paying to her. She held her breath and with a twist and a hard pull her thumb popped out of its joint and her hand slipped up and out of the rope. She let her breath out through her teeth and quickly untangled her other hand and without hesitation she popped her thumb back in, a small pop telling her it was in place. She knew it would swell fast without proper care and putting any pressure on it would be a bad idea.
Gingerly she used her good hand to pull the ropes off herself and she stood for the first time in two days. Every joint and every muscle protested and she stumbled awkwardly but thankfully, silently, towards the window. Her body was screaming in protest and she almost sank to the floor in front of the window but she grasped the sill and gazed out into the night, thinking of Sirius.
If she could only get out of this house she might be able to put a few hours of distance between her and those that would inevitably come looking for her. If she could get close to a wizarding town or village then she would make her way to the Order house and then she would be safe. The thought of seeing Sirius kept her on her feet and pulling strength from that she lifted herself up and climbed through the window and into the snow outside.
She rolled into the snow and let herself have a brief moment to adjust. She hurt worse than she had ever hurt but she knew she had to keep moving, without a wand she wouldn't get far fast and the snow on the ground would give away her trail quicker than if she yelled to them. She staggered silently to her feet, wondering when it had snowed. The small cottage was surrounded by trees and she headed directly into them, hoping the snow was less thick and less likely to take her track. She stumbled along, catching tree roots on her boots and shivering worse than she had before. Her heart was still racing, keeping her from slowing down. The ground was hard and frozen but luckily the canopy of trees had kept much of the snow from reaching the ground.
She walked for what seemed like an hour or more but the moon was still shining above her, a full moon. She continued on, hoping that they wouldn't come looking for her until close to dawn and maybe by then she would come across something or anything friendly. Her mouth felt dry but she didn't want to eat any snow for fear that it would lower her body temperature more. She was contemplating turning slightly west when a nose sounded behind her that made her heart jump and her brain freeze in terror.
A high pitched scream sounded and she knew instantly that they must have checked on her earlier than she had anticipated. Without a second thought she was running through the woods, leaping over roots and fallen branches, arms and legs pumping to get away from the people chasing her. Every pain she had felt, the stiffness in her muscles disappeared as adrenaline surged through her. The woods seemed to clear in front of her and a large house appeared, old and apparently deserted. She had no time to think, she could hear the footfalls of those behind her and she dodged around the side of the house and stopped, panting.
'Come out Grey!' Severus Snape called and Eileen felt momentarily stunned by his voice.
She moved along the back of the house until her hand came in contact with a hard wooden handle. She turned it and the door opened a fraction, enough for her to squeeze inside. She shut it behind her, knowing she was on borrowed time. Maybe if she could get one of their wands, she would be able to apparate away. She stepped away from the door, turning into what seemed to be a hallway with an open door with steps leading down. Picture frames hung off the walls unmoving, a muggle home, and the floor was dusty and covered in old bits of junk and paper. The flowery wall paper was mouldy and peeling in places as she breathed in the smell of damp wood and mildew.
As she rounded the corner the hair on the back of her neck stood up and she knew, too late, that the room wasn't empty. Dougal Grey stood in the center of the room with Lucius, wands raised and pointed directly at her. She dodged to her right without thinking as Dougal screamed 'STUPIFY!"
She smashed sideways into another room and found herself in a large empty area with two doors leading into adjacent rooms.
Malfoy ran into the room after her, 'AVADA –.' Malfoy yelled but she ran at him, ramming her shoulder into his stomach and he went stumbling sideways as Dougal and Rabastan pelted into the room.
'EXPULSO!' Dougal cried and Eileen ducked behind a wall to avoid the blasting curse but it hit the wall she was behind and flung her backwards, rubble landing all around her and with an audible snap, her arm broke and she screamed in pain.
'YOU BLASTED THE DOOR IN!' Rodolphus shouted at her father from the other side of the caved in room. 'HELP US CLEAR THIS AWAY LUCIUS!'
She could hear them shuffling around on the other side and with an effort that made the blood drain from her face she pushed the debris off of herself and stood, clutching her broken arm against her body she made for the other door, and pushed it open. She was back in the hall near the place she entered. Before she could turn Lucius shot out of nowhere and was on her and he pulled her down by her hair and the two of them went tumbling down the steps, each one rattling her broken arm and by the time they rolled on the landing her vision was going black at the edges.
She struggled to stay conscience but it was no use, the others were clambering down the stairs and in a flash Rodolphus had her bound again.
'Thought you'd get away from us did you?' He spat, snarling at her.
Her broken arm was pinned behind her with the other, forcing the broken limb into an awkward angle. The pain was almost too much and she started hoping for either unconsciousness or death as her father's face came level to hers.
'You are no child of mine. Filthy traitor that you are, you deserve to die.' He said and his voice was low so only she could hear him. 'You were always so weak, pathetic even and now you will understand what it means to cross the Dark Lord. You will understand what your mudblood loving brother knows, you don't cross me girl because I will kill him in the end, just as I am going to let them kill you now.'
'I'd rather die than spend another moment as your daughter. Kill me now, it will make no difference. Voldemort will never win this war!' she spat the words at him and they all flinched at her use of his name.
Bellatrix strode over, reached out and smacked her across the face. 'HOW DARE YOU! FILTHY BLOOD TRAITOR!' She screamed and Eileen couldn't help it and give her a smile before spitting a mouth full of blood unto the floor.
'Let's get this over with.' Said Rodolphus. 'I'll be outside.'
Rabastan moved over to her, the cold, cruel and disturbing look in his eye that always made her blood chill was there as he kneeled down beside her, pulling a long thin blade from his robes.
'It was your pretty face that made me want you, so I asked the Dark Lord if I could have you and he agreed. You looked like the type that needed a little push to get going but I desired you, still do maybe –,' he cut off, and ran a hand over her face, cupping her face roughly. He let go and grabbed her chin in his left hand and placed the knife tip against her top lip. 'The way I see it is – if I can't have you -.' He pressed the knife in and she felt the sharp blade cutting her face and she screamed as he trailed the blade up her cheek. 'I don't see why anyone else should and now your pretty face isn't so pretty.' He released her face and the knife stopped at the top of her cheek bone and blood was running freely and fast out of the deep wound and down her face and neck and unto her clothes and floor.
He let her go and she dropped onto the floor, her body protesting so violently that her vision went black. Her arm was screaming in protest and her face felt as if red-hot metal were lying across it where the wound was. She could still hear Bellatrix, screaming with laughter and the last thing she remembered before the world died around her was the clatter of something near her head and a familiar voice that said, 'Get off the ground Grey and act like a witch instead of a muggle.'
The smell of wood smoke hit her and she groaned. Thick hot heat surrounded her, pushing in from all sides and a ringing laughter filled the air but as if it was coming from a distance. She rolled over and instantly regretted it as her arm throbbed. She felt the sweat running down her face, her neck, her back and mixing with the blood on her face which was still running but with less intensity.
She must have blacked out for no more than a few minutes but when she opened her eyes the world around her came crashing back as the place burned around her. Flames were dancing up the walls and up the staircase, licking down from the ceiling and the banister over her head was spitting so violently that it was a wonder it hadn't fallen on top of her yet. She felt her breathing grow shallow as the smoke pressed into her lungs and she panicked for a moment until her eyes came across something that she could hardly believe.
Her wand was there lying only a foot away from her head, and she gaped at it as if it was the first time she had ever seen it. There was no way, how did it get there? Something in the house groaned and the flames seemed to dance higher and with more intensity and she stopped thinking and with great effort pulled herself into a sitting position and grabbed her wand up with her good hand behind her back.
She severed the binds in a flash and holding her wand firmly in the wrong hand, her wand arm pressed tightly against her chest as it was still broken. She pressed forward and water erupted from the tip of her wand, clearing some of the flames from the steps. She moved up them slowly, achingly and with all the strength she had. The flames licked up behind her and she arched away from them, feeling the skin blister and heat on her back and shoulders. She wanted to scream but pressed her lips firmly together, holding in the pain. She just needed to reach the door she came in and she would be able to apparate out.
The hall and house were burning and crumpling and she made her way up the hall as fast as she could, her lungs burning from the smoke and the effort. She reached the door and pushed open the door with her good shoulder, falling out into the freezing air and scanning around for any sign of the Death Eaters. They must be at the front of the house, she could still hear Bellatrix laughing and without a backwards look she turned on the spot, gathering every last once of will and strength and thinking of the first thing that came into her head she disaparated, leaving the burning house behind.
When she reappeared she was at the edge of a small wood, looking at the back of a small neat house. A moment of panic passed through her as she didn't recognize the place but she couldn't think any more and she stumbled into the garden and collapsed as the back door opened.
Sirius sat at the table, the house soundless and empty. Tonight was the full moon and Remus was away. James was with him, and Peter but Sirius couldn't bring himself to go out, he didn't want to and he didn't think he could. He didn't want his anger and pain to affect Moony while he was transformed and potentially put them all in danger. So he sat, drink in hand, drowning away the pain he felt at the loss of the woman who he had fallen in love with for such a short time. Lily had offered to come over and stay with him but he had had far too many people fussing over him, asking him if he needed anything or just generally trying to care. He didn't see what they could do for him either way, Eileen was the one that was dead, he was still alive, and unless they could change that he didn't want or need their help.
He had refused to let Remus play any of the muggle music for the last two days, and he had sat with the drapes pulled shut and telling anyone that came by, 'thanks but I'm fine.' He knew he would have to stop mourning her eventually but he was so angry, not at James and not at the Order but at everyone and everything. He felt like something had been stolen away from him and hot, raging hatred was consuming him and he knew that he couldn't do anything but sit here and drink because to do anything else would be useless unless he were hunting down and killing every single last Death Eater.
The world seemed like a place a lot less worth saving and he wondered a few times over the past couple days whether they should just pack up and leave, leave and go away to some place far, far away. He thought that maybe he would ask James about just leaving but he hadn't solidified the idea in his own head yet. Maybe it was because he knew he would never do it, maybe because it felt too much like running away. Maybe it was running away.
Eileen wouldn't have run. The thought made him smile a small, sad smile. She was spying for them! Risking her life to gather some information, she would have thought him a coward for thinking this way. Who knew what she would think, she was dead now and he would never know. He thought that maybe they could have been more, had more and he turned away from the thought because it was far too painful.
A popping noise broke his thoughts and he slowly put his glass back on the table and picked up his wand. The drapes were pulled shut and the back door locked. Someone had just aparated into his back garden, something that was impolite in most cases unless they were there to kill you. He stood slowly, wrapping his fingers around his wand and moving silently towards the door. He never knew a Death Eater to wait for someone to answer the door but either way he peeked out from behind the drapes and watched as someone stumbled into the garden. His mind went blank for a moment but his body moved without him, throwing open the door.
There she was, face down in the snow, wearing next to nothing. He could see the faint rise and fall as she struggled to breath and in a second he was beside her, lifting her limp body out of the snow.
Author's Note: First let me start by saying thank you for reading and reviewing! It is so wonderful hearing from you all. Second I want to say this chapter was challenging to write and I hope I did it justice. It was an emotional chapter to write. Please leave some feedback if you can, I would love to hear what you have to say, or any predictions you may have! I'm happy to discuss anything (without giving anything away of course! :) )