AN: The boat ride towards Zaban City commences.
Killua embarks on an emotional roller coaster of a journey and strangely; he's content with its pace as long as a certain someone is there to share in the experience with him.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GONNNNNNN (and me lmao I share his bday okay haha)
Because it's his birthday, I added a sappy flash forward just because I can and u know what, maybe I will add this in the future just cuz AND WHATEVER DEAL WITH IT I GOT ALL CHEESY ARGH. Otherwise, I'm finally progressing forward and excited to see what's in store for them cause all the ideas are flowing and I am wired like electric cables bebi lmfaoimweirdstfu.
Anyway, thanks for reading like usual lol. Feedback is always appreciated muhahaha. The next few chapters are gonna be long so you're warned beforehand.
Enjoy.
When they catch you Alone
12
The small red flag cut from Mito-san's own coveted shirt waved high in the air, hoisted at the tip of the hill where Mito and Abe's graves had been dug- their burial securing themselves permanent remembrance in Gon Freecs mind as he waved the further those two small stones shrunk from view. Even though he knew their spirits probably couldn't spot his hand in the distance, he still kept it held high with aspiration; all the way until Whale Island slipped out of sight.
"See you later, Whale Island." Gon saluted and Killua was face palming beside him. "You will be greatly missed, but rest assured, I'll be back soon! I promise!"
"It's an island, Gon. It doesn't speak English. It doesn't even talk, period."
The assassin made a disgruntled sound at Gon's sideways glance his way. "It's still my home. I think the least I can do is show my appreciation for it."
"Whatever you say, weirdo."
Killua twisted on his heel and walked off, Gon trailing behind him still smiling brightly as he stretched openly in the air. They were lucky to have been picked for the main boat ride; the one Hanzo and most of his trusted commandeers were boarded on. That guaranteed them the best safety net in the course of a surprise enemy attack because the strongest members of their squad were gathered together.
Three boats together; all departing at varying times, had set sail from Whale Island in separate directions. Half-way between Whale Island and their next destination; they would pause at another smaller island to pick up the members of Silver Squadron 1; the attacking formation. Again, they would be divided into three factions and the groups will all transfer between different points until eventually meeting back together in The Republic of Padokia.
And although Gon and Killua had been lucky to wind up on the same boat as Kurapika, Leorio, and even Hanzo; well, their luck wasn't going to hold up if Killua's prediction played out right.
He hoped it wouldn't.
"Where's Kurapika and Leorio?" Gon voiced aloud Killua's wandering thoughts, following him along the small, creaky old deck of a pathetic-excuse for a boat. Killua gave the boat maybe a day at best before it broke down judging by how poorly built it was. This wasn't even accounting for the amount of damage it seemed to have already sustained. Even the outer shell was as rotted as the inside. The wood beneath their toes was barely holding under their weight and he knew adding on even a few more bodies would have them clinging to the boat's less-then-likely resilient undercarriage for the rest of the oh-so-joyous ride.
"Somewhere in the main cabin probably conversing with Hanzo about business-crap or something like that. I don't know and I don't really care." Killua wiggled his hands down into the pockets of his new change in attire; a pair of dark navy shorts with white stripes down the sides and a matching navy turtle-neck sweater under a loose, creamy white v-neck shirt. Gon took in the appreciating amounts of pale skin that was now exposed to the daylight and would giggle to himself once and awhile at how Killua's purple sneakers had little dots and lines on them that he often mistook for a face unless he did a double-take.
Gon really liked this change in Killua; unlike so many who wore the customary garb of war, all so uniformed and same. It was like a never ending parade of puppets, all marching to the same beat, the same pace; all looking exactly alike.
Now that the Zoldyck stood out even more, Gon was more then happy to stare at this open display of defiance. At least, in his mind anyway, that was what he'd imagine it to be as.
"Why don't you care, Killua?" asked Gon out of nowhere, propping his elbows on the railing where Killua had paused to stand; his sapphire eyes scanning the outstretch of blue horizon going on for miles on end. His eyes matched the color of the sea and Gon wouldn't lie in saying that he kind of liked that fact.
Killua didn't look at him when he spoke, chin held high on the cool updraft wafting from the sea below that Gon could clearly see the goosebumps there. "Why should I? I mean, it's not like I have any business with the stuff they discuss concerning the war. I'm pretty much here just to fight and avoid any confrontation with my parents. Why should I get involved with any of that tactical shit if it's just going to end up throwing me over into the hands of the Hunter Association? They're such freaks when it comes to the Zoldycks, it's not even funny. I'd be on the front lines if it hadn't been or Hanzo's persuasive nagginess that grabbed me in his favor."
"Why does the association want to recruit your family?"
"Well, since we're at war, the Hunter Association is desperate for strong fighters." The words rolled right off the albino's tongue; a practiced and rehearsed sentiment, more or less. "There aren't that many Hunters out there that can pose a major threat to the Chimera Ants. So, they're looking for anybody who's capable of making even a dent in the oppositions force. Who better then to call the world's most renowned family of assassins? My father was all-too willing to join the effort with a little persuasion; my grandpa not so eager until they flashed on the dollar signs. They even recruited my fat brother, Milluki, who probably hasn't seen daylight since he was a snobby brat kid. My mother stayed behind to take care of our younger siblings and deal with our business because; you know, 'we somehow still have one even while the whole world is at war' or some crap like that."
"Wow! What kind of assassination jobs does someone get in the middle of a war?"
"Hell if I know." Killua laughed like it was somehow funny. Gon didn't. "My guess is probably to assassinate Chimera Ants or something stupid like that. Even better would be people desperate to rid of other budding members of society; like the upper-class, before saving their sorry asses to out live and take their spot when the war 'ends'. That's just my hypothesis anyway. People just love to take matters into their own hands when there's all this insuring chaos and madness to back them up. It's the perfect cover-up for a perfect getaway murder."
"I guess that sounds logical." A small, quiet hum and a nod answered back.
Killua was carding his fingers through his silver tufts with a heavy sigh while he continued, maintaining his eye contact on the stretch of endless water and not Gon's blank, neutral expression watching him like a hawk. "Of course it's logical. That's how greedy and selfish society is. They'll do anything to rise in power if it means having endless riches and spoils to feed their fat asses for the rest of their lives. It's so dumb."
"We're only humans." was all Gon managed to push out, throat tightening and Killua finally acknowledged his presence, a brow raised. "And humans do stupid things all the time." Gon turned over and smiled. Killua never felt more unnerved in his entire life then now, staring into that happy, carefree face of Gon Freecs. He both wanted to stay and flee at the same time; his mind and body torn between which was the wiser choice.
He just couldn't pick either.
"But, that's what makes us who we are, you know? Aunt Mito told me something like that once, when we rescued a baby Foxbear cub from some poachers. It was on the verge of death and when I first saw it, I thought it would have been better to put it out of its misery. It was suffering and in so much pain, that I panicked and almost did something really wrong. Mito-san reprimanded me though; stating that life was precious and special, that we shouldn't just throw it away if someone is still fighting to survive. Just like that cub was. I realized then that what I had tried to do was stupid and Mito-san said people do a lot of stupid things in their life. But those stupid things are what make us into who we are now. Her and I worked together to save the fox bear cub and eventually released it back into the wild where it's now living a nice and happy life again."
"When the hell did you become philosophical."
It was Gon's turn to laugh and he did not know why this time.
"I don't really know."
"You're really weird, Gon." Killua fought the urge to smile himself; because Gon's smiles were contagious and so was this thick, warm atmosphere radiating from melted caramel skin and gold, honey-suckle orbs. It was suffocating. Almost.
"Now, that, I do know!" Gon threw a finger to the air and it flailed in the air when Killua smacked him, hard, in the back of the head. "Oww! That hurt!"
"Idiot."
"I don't mind being an idiot if it means I get to be friends with Killua. So call me an idiot as much as you want." said Gon, matter-of-factually. Killua's eyes widened in shock.
Friend...?
"Gon, I-?"
"Nice blush you're sporting Killua. Looks great on you."
"Shit."
Out of nowhere, Leorio appeared behind them, smirk clear as day and hands on his hips. Killua quickly turned his slowly reddening face from view and coughed; his colorful skin hidden behind his unruly bangs. His blue eyes were now narrowed to slits and he hissed under his breath like a seething cat that had just been interrupted in a middle of a good meal. A real good meal, honestly. Gon laughed abashedly, rubbing the back of his neck gently in his familiar guilty gesture. He waved to Leorio while he approached, greeting him with a broad grin.
"Hey, Leorio. It's good to see you! Killua and I were wondering where you went."
"Hey, Gon. Kil-lu-a." Leorio punctuated the albino's name, granting him a disapproving twitch.
"Li-or-i-o."
"It's Leorio, you dumb brat!"
"Liorio."
"LE-OR-I-O."
"Leonardo"
"You're such a punk ass."
"Thanks, old fart."
"Leorio-san!"
Instead of his fist attempting to pulverize the white-haired assassin; Leorio thrust a finger towards Gon's way and beamed. "See, somebody at least gets my name correct. What does it take to get a little bit of appreciation around here? Seriously? Is it to much to ask for a little bit of respect for your elders?"
"Well, you are old, so I guess-" Killua started but Gon was flailing in front of the others mouth wildly to stop him from talking. Killua's small glare was all Leorio could make out past Gon's bulging, brownish hands.
"Don't mind Killua." The Freecs teen chuckled, nudging the stiffened bleached-haired teen beside him with his elbow. Killua grunted but didn't budge. "He's just being grouchy. What about you? Where's Kurapika?"
"Still with Hanzo addressing the matters of our cargo transports. He wants to make sure they're making good progress." Gon was smiling; big, and Killua looked absolutely bored.
Yeah, they make a good pair. A pair of polar opposite, bratty teenagers. Leorio commended and coughed softly, putting on his best face. "Anyway, I came to see what you two were up to before we hit the first stop. Are you enjoying the boat ride so far?"
"Yeah!" Gon brightened like an excited kid in a candy store; his grin threatening to split his face in half. It was so happy. "Boat rides are so much fun. Mito-san and I used to take boat rides all the time around the Island and I even once made myself a make-shift raft to wade down some of the smaller streams when I was younger. I found all the best fishing spots that way."
"Seems like you've done stuff like this before, Gon." nodded Leorio, pleasantly surprised.
"Yep!"
"It's boring. I think I'd be better off swimming there at this rate. It'd be faster. Does this thing seriously go this slow?" Killua's dry comment came next, an expression to match. Leorio's brow furrowed, mouth twitching at the sides.
"It's all the Association would give us in order to not draw attention to ourselves. So, of course it's going to look shitty and be slow, but at least it's better then nothing, you snot. Show some appreciation will you?! Hanzo worked really hard to get this thing!"
"Really?" Killua was glancing left and right and beside him, Gon wore a badge of neutrality; completely oblivious to the dueling emotions at hand. "Because this thing is as run down as a piece of junk. If he tried hard to get it, then he really screwed himself over. We could have done better with paddle boats and oars."
"Killua, you are so-"
"Hey, Leorio! Where are we headed exactly, anyway?" Gon intercepted, perking up expectantly. Killua smirked victoriously next to him and Leorio's fist was moments away from punching off that snotty teenager's mouth if he didn't hesitate to do it.
Calmly and with much effort, the medical hunter lowered his hand into the pocket of his dress trousers, grumbling under his breath profanity after profanity to get it off his chest, before speaking. "Zaban City. Not that far from here luckily. That's where we're picking up more members from the Silver Squadron to take with us on our way to Padokia. I hear they're all gathered there after clearing out the remaining Chimera Ant forces that were stationed in the city."
"Really? How long did it take for them to do that?"
"Barely even a week."
"Is that good?" Gon turned to Killua, starry-eyed with interest. The assassin inhaled sharply and laughed, although it sounded more forced then anything. The tanned-skinned teen's face then faltered, dropping its earlier eagerness for concern. There was a harsh, degrading atmosphere in the ring of that laugh now and Gon didn't even need super inhuman senses to feel the icy chill all the way down into his very bone marrow.
"Is that good? Hah! Gon, that's just insane, really. It took us almost a month or so to clear out Whale Island's prisons and it takes them a week to desolate an entire city filled with mutant Ants. Is that good you ask? That's just fucking ridiculous."
"Wait, Killua-"
"No." The aforementioned boy held up his hand, stopping Leorio in his tracks with a haughty glare, lip bit, "Just, no. I don't want to hear it. Those people are crazy I tell you. All they care about is killing. All they do is kill. It's no better then what I do. I just can't understand how they can act so cruelly towards their comrades. How can people like that be so.. be so-"
"Not all of them are like that, Killua. I mean, some of our friends are there, like Senritsu, and they aren't focused on just killing! So, don't you dare say that when it's not true." Leorio pressed, butting in. Gon was busying himself looking from Killua back to Leorio and so forth; watching them converse and ears intently focused. He could see every twitch and twist of Killua's face, a sense of madness sinking in; and the way Leorio's mouth and eyes contorted, looking pained and disturbed altogether. Like he knew Killua had a point but was afraid to agree to it, while Killua was lost in the warring thoughts of factual life.
Gon wished he understood better to offer anything to console either of his two new pals; but alas, he could only remain silent and in neutral standing. And he hated that.
"It is true and you know it, Leorio. That's their job. To kill the Ants. They don't save anyone. They don't care. They just destroy everything, just like the Association ORDERED them to do!"
Killua was storming off faster then Gon could get his hands around those bony wrists and stop him. But before Gon could follow after the albino, it was Leorio who caught his arm and forced him to a halt. Gon was helpless as he watched the back of Killua's strong, rigid back, fade off into the distance, until he eventually disappeared below the boat deck and shut the door behind him, effectively gone. Those slumped, defeated shoulders of someone trembling with anxiety and negative, viral emotion was burned behind Gon's retina's; burned into his memory now. He couldn't get it out even if he tried.
"Killua! Wait-!"
"Gon. Leave him be." Leorio instructed and Gon could clearly see the pain now in the older man's expression. "I know you want to help, but there isn't anything you can do."
"Why not?" Amber orbs erupted then, a flickering of flames in the backs of his eyes, a spark of emotion that hadn't been there now more obvious than ever. Anger. "Killua's upset. Why can't I help him?"
"You don't understand, Gon-"
"Then I want to understand!" He ripped his arm away from Leorio; who gasped, a glare sent his way. "Just tell me, Leorio! Make me understand so I can help!"
"You hardly even know him, Gon. How do you expect to understand just like that? You can't! We've been fighting this war with Killua for years. We've seen and done a lot of shit we regret. But you can't just expect to know what we've been through all at once. It just doesn't work like that!"
"I don't care!"
"Gon!"
"I don't care!"
"Gon, stop-!"
Smash went the edge of the boat's outer rim when Gon's fist went flying through it, splintering the wood to a hundred pieces. They went every which way, Leorio shielding his face in time from the force of the cracking Gon's hand produced. His knuckles stay lodged there, blood peppering the skin around the developing bruises, and the tremble in Gon's breathing was rugged, hoarse. He was breathing in shallow, deep gulps and Leorio undoubtedly saw the tense flare of aura rippling off Gon's frame, angry and cautious like a lethal animal ready to tear into the nearest victim, but still debating on its plan of attack.
There was a deadly blackness darkening those golden-yellow eyes of Gon's then and Leorio could easily feel the tapping of the Grim Reaper's cold, bony hand on his shoulder. A shadow looming on the horizon, kissing away the light.
Out of purely trained instinct, Leorio took a cautionary step back, hands raised defensively in front of him, and the brief flash of terror in his face seemed to snap Gon from his senses; because he was blinking and looking completely normal in just one bat of an eye.
"Leorio? Are you okay?"
"Gon-?"
"What's going on here?"
Kurapika's voice brought both males to attention, garnering their blank, confused stares in the blonde's direction. Kurapika blinked twice then cocked his head to the side, looking perturbed. "What's with those looks? What happened?" His sight fell on Gon's hand still hovering in the gaping hole of the ship's hull and he rose a brow heavenward. "And why are you punching the boat, Gon? It's already a wreck. I know you want to help but that's not really the proper way to do so."
"Oh-" Gon quickly pried his embedded limb free and wiped the bloody knuckle furiously with his jacket, laughing tersely, "Sorry Kurapika. I don't know what came over me."
"It's alright." Kurapika accepted Gon's apology with a nod before turning to Leorio who was slowly unwinding his locked-up limbs from the odd position he was in. "Should I even ask what is going on here?"
"Later." was all the doctor croaked out, the slight furrow of his brow making Kurapika purse his lips thoughtfully. The muscles in Leorio's face were scrunched and wrongfully taut, like a wordless signal to his friend. With a resolute nod, the silent message passed between them was received.
"I just got done speaking with Hanzo and he says we should arrive at Zaban City in no less then two hours. The ocean's clear and calm as day which will make our travel go by quicker. That's the good news."
"Does that mean there is bad news then?" Gon asked, thumb distractedly rubbing at his bleeding knuckle.
Kurapika smiled, though faintly. "A little. But it's honestly not going to be a big deal with all of us Hunters gathered together so tight-knit. So it won't be of too great a concern unless we're posed with a dangerous and powerful threat."
"Is it more Ants?" Leorio begrudgingly tossed in the air, looking sickly-pale at the idea. Kurapika; unfortunately, confirmed his worries with a bob of his head.
"Sadly, yes. We just received a transmission from Satotz stating there is a small fleet of Ants spotted on the horizon, headed towards Zaban City. We'll be intercepting them as we're making our way in. But it shouldn't be much of a hassle because they'll have both Silver Squadrons to contend with."
"I guess so." said Leorio but there was no confidence in his tone. Gon's mouth was held in a grim line, quiet and tight-lipped. "Did he happen to mention how much we'll possibly be facing?"
"They estimate between 150-200 Chimera Ants. None of them seem to carry any Nen-aura which groups them on the weaker end of the scale. That's our best hope really."
Gon blinked, raising his hand ever-so slightly and coughed under his breath. "Wait, Kurapika. Are there really Chimera Ants who can use Nen? I thought only humans could use Nen."
"Yes, there are. And every living thing has Nen, Gon, but only certain individuals are even capable of using it. In this case, it's very rare to find any Ants outside the front lines who can use it. Most of the strongest Ants are stationed near the main-point of the war, where you'll find Chairman Netero and his troops battling. That's where they would need the Nen power the most."
"Are they strong?" Gon hesitantly added, moving a step away from the damage he's caused to the rickety boat. "I mean, like, with Nen anyway. How strong are they?"
"Real strong, Gon. So strong, that just one Chimera Ant wielding Nen could possibly wipe out our entire team in one go. That's how scarily powerful they are." Leorio answered for Kurapika, face in all seriousness. Gon gulped, nodding.
"The point of the matter is, we'll be having a small battle on our hands when we reach Zaban City. So I think it's time we have a quick chat about Nen so Gon has at least a basic understanding of it before he's forced to fight alongside us. Don't you think so, Leorio?" Kurapika settled a hand on his companion's shoulder, squeezing, and Leorio couldn't help but sigh and give into the touch. He immediately loosened in the build and rose to his full height, dusting off the bits of finely shredded wood from his pants, a smile on his lips.
"Yeah. Alright. You're the boss. Time to show Gon some Nen then."
"Cool!" Gon threw up his arms, grinning ear to ear. "Finally I get to learn Nen. I can't wait."
"But first," Leorio held up a hand to amend for his earlier behavior and Gon couldn't grin any bigger then he already was if he tried; which believably, he was trying, "Let's get Killua. He should be apart of this, too."
"Yes. Yes he should." Kurapika agreed.
And they were both wrong. Gon could grin even bigger because his eyes started watering and the sides of his face started twitching rather humorously and the three males couldn't help but fall into a small fit of shared laughter at the funny familiarity of their current predicament. A new comrade by their side, now.
"Alright. Here we come, Killua!"
"You don't look so well, Killua."
A soft voice, feminine, but also cautious, spoke from behind the Zoldyck teen and he quickly withdrew his shoulders inward, hugging at his knees with a glare at the wall. Just when he finally thought he had managed to seclude himself alone, somebody had to find him. There was a limited amount of space and a limited amount of available rooms on this run-down ship. He just so happened to stumble upon the only vacant storage room with enough area for maybe two people at best, but that was pushing it. At least it was her, anyway, and not some other lousy excuse for 'friends'. "Are you sure you don't want me to get you something?"
"No, Palm. I'm fine. I told you this ten times already. I don't need anything. Now can you please go away already?" Killua accentuated the fine part with much effort, his eyes pinched together from the tensing in his face. As much as he hated being rude to one of the very few sensible women in their squad that he held ample respect for (Palm seemed incapable of treating anyone who was younger then her with an ounce of courtesy so it gave him plenty of pleasure to argue with her on one of her good days), he just didn't feel in the mood today to be bothered. Palm Siberia's bipolar moments were unpredictable; if he caught her on a bad time, he'd sooner find his neck hanging in a unforgiving noose then clash a duel of heated words with her.
Or the few times he found huge steak knives stabbed in his bed just an inch apart from tearing into his throat. There was that too.
He knew being rude at a moment that she was being nice would be forcing him to sign his death certificate for an early grave that even his family's insanely gifted assassination talents couldn't prevent.
"But you don't-"
"I'm fine!"
Through the shaggy forest of tangled black locks, Palm's dark eyes squinted and if Killua had been paying better attention he might have saw how deeply frowned her thin lips were. Stomping over without making the slightest sound; the woman named Palm grabbed hold of both the young assassin's ears and yanked as hard as she was able. The none-too-manly shriek that came from Killua's throat would have been ear-bleeding worthy if she didn't clamp a hand over his mouth right after, releasing her grip with a huff.
"You're not fine and it's more then obvious, too! So quit being a baby and let me do something to help!"
"Palm-" Killua started to say the second she pulled her hand from his mouth but it was quickly slapped back on when those crystal blue eyes found themselves lock in onyx ones, still glaring through her hair.
"Excuse me, young, Mr. Zoldyck; but you're stubborn. So stubborn that it drives crazy caring types like me to the brink of insanity! Do I need to drill some sense through that thick skull of yours or what? You know some of us care, even if you choose to ignore it. The least you can do is show us a little bit of recognition."
"But I do-!" He attempted to speak through her fingers but her grip on his face was unrelenting, long nails digging into his cheek bones a little too hard for his liking. Tears dotted at the corners of his eyes.
"No, you push us away every time, running away to sulk and mope alone just like you're doing right now. So what's your excuse this time for me to be finding you curled up in a corner pouting like a child? You're sixteen years old, Killua. A growing young man. It's time to act like one."
Prying off her hands, Killua sent his own glare her way; a pair of narrowed eyes challenging each other in a duel that neither would back down from. "Hey! I act like an adult! Geez, give me some credit for at least trying to act civilized and normal like everybody else. I try to get along with people but it just ain't a cinch to do, okay?! You know it's not as easy as everyone makes it out to be. I try and try and try and no matter what I do, it hasn't gotten any better. Cut me some slack, I'm just one stinking person!"
There was a lone pause of silence distributed between them, edgy and suffocating, before the woman sucked in a deep breath and sighed out loud, bristling Killua where he stood. "I know." Palm's scrunched up face relaxed, smile forming, and Killua released the grip on her wrists in surprise at the tender expression he was receiving. "I know exactly what you mean. I'm happy to hear you say that, Killua. It's true. And you have been trying so hard that we're so proud of you. We just want what's best for you, that's all. And if it means doing stupid things like this, well, then that's okay too. You've been making progress! Don't you think? We all think so. And all you have to do is just keep right on going! That's all!"
"'We?' Who's 'we'? What is that supposed to mean? What the hell are you talking about?" Confused. Killua was confused. It was written as obvious as the faint jagged lines on his brow, his chin, his neck. More obvious then the crisscrossing cuts etched in pearly white on the backs of his wrist, his hands, the insides of his elbows. Killua's scars of the past weren't as obvious as the genuine emotion going full display on his face, right at this very moment. Wide, puzzling sapphire hues and a small mouth, fumbling with a frown; all of it so open publicly that anyone passing up this chance to see it was missing something special alright.
Palm; a woman who'd watch the steady decline of people's sanity fall into the pits of Hell during this dark day and age, appreciated that little bit of light shining through the dark. Regardless of its size.
Not saying anything, she leaned forward to Killua's height and ruffled up his shaggy mane of hair; earning a string of quiet protests, and walked back out the door without a word. Because, in her opinion, no more words needed to be said as long as he kept up the pace he was moving towards. Nobody should question a person once-heartless and made of steel, finally digging free that vulnerable shell of theirs and start picking at the cracks which have formed with a new found curiosity on how they got there and what lies beneath them.
It's a good thing, Palm had said to Kurapika when they last crossed paths, That he's finally opening up. I'm glad it's with you two.
I know. Kurapika smiled. Palm swooned in his presence, the blonde chuckling lightly. Me, too.
Killua stared dumbfounded at the cruddy door swinging back and forth on its last hinges where the last of Palm's frizzy black tangles had fluttered by from and tilted his head sideways, chewing on his bottom lip.
"What the hell is up with these people?" He voiced out loud to no one, still more lost then before, and he gave up with a sigh. He had half been expecting Palm to lose his cool at his words; to throw a temper tantrum like she normally did when he became an unbearable grouch. But, no, she just had to go all motherly on him.
And the young fair-haired teen still couldn't sort his feelings about the situation, no matter how many times it had occurred since. He lacked the capacity to understand it, truthfully. A lack of a mother's love made his heart turn hard, he knew, but Killua thought better of himself to at least be able to grasp the concept over the years. A high intelligence level had to help in someway, right?
It didn't.
And, to top it off, Palm had the nasty and uncanny habit of going soft on him at the most inopportune instances and by the time he could reel in a proper reaction, no amount of deep, logical contemplation could solve the mystery that was Ms. Palm Siberia.
Heck, Killua thought he might even be able to predict Gon better then he could Palm. And that was a scary thought all in itself. Gon was the king of unpredictability when he wasn't being simple-minded and brutally honest to a fault.
He feared for the time they may eventually cross paths.
"Geez. I'm surrounded by crazies."
Killua combed his fingers through his pale tresses and glanced up right when the door swung open a second time. His jaw was working its way to hit the floor as Gon's jubilant smile blasted it's entrance ten fold within the background light haloing around his face. It temporarily blinded him. The warm glow poured in, thawing his cold exterior, and Killua sighed, defeated in the afterglow of his darker sanctuary, now turned glimmering.
"I found you, Killua!"
There just was no winning with this guy. He really couldn't be alone again, now could he?
"Hey, Gon."
As Killua was turning around, Gon was running at him. The Freecs boy rushed up so fast that even his skillfully timed instincts couldn't weasel his way out of this one and a bone-crushing grip enveloped him into a hug. Killua choked on a breath and Gon was bouncing in place, not letting go, as his laugh rang in the air like a chime. Kurapika and Leorio came next to hover in the doorway, small smiles on their faces, and Killua felt his facial skin battle between turning red from embarrassment and blue from lack of air.
"We've been looking everywhere for you, Killua! I was going crazy! It took us awhile but we're finally all here! I didn't know this tiny boat could have so many rooms and there's people everywhere. But we stumbled on this one in the back and here Killua was! I'm glad." Gon exclaimed, swinging Killua's poor tiny frame side to side in his big burly arms and the assassin squirmed, twitching his head anxiously. Even his exceptional strength couldn't break out of this vice. Gon was much stronger then he anticipated.
"G-Gon." He wheezed, droplets kissing the corners of his blue irises, "L-let go. I can't b-breathe! Gon!" He tried to kick in vain, swinging his legs and kicking at Gon's thighs, but it didn't phase the tanned-skinned teenager because he was obviously having a grand time squeezing every ounce of oxygen out of his lungs and breaking some of his bones in the process.
"What did you say, Killua?" Gon joked, giggling like a little school girl, and he stopped in his chaotic swinging to stare up into Killua's eyes wearing a huge, playful grin. "I never realized how light you are. Killua should eat more. You're really skinny and tiny."
Killua's eyes bulged and he started stammering, now his pale skin tone deciding on a nice shade of crimson when he really didn't need it. "S-shut up, y-you embarrassing idiot!" A hiss, like a bristling cat, and he grit his teeth, thrashing around in Gon's arms. "Let go of me right now or I swear-"
"-Okay." Gon dropped him instantly and Killua fell to the floor, landing on his bottom. He groaned softly and rubbed his aching backside, casting a heated glare up at a smirking Gon. "You told me to let you go right now so I did." He pointed out, matter-of-factually. Killua's hiss became a growl.
"Gently would have been nice you know. Geez."
"Oops?"
"You're an assh-"
"Hey Killua." Kurapika butt in, stepping forward with Leorio at his side. "What are you doing hiding in here anyway?"
"Well, obviously to get away from you guys." Killua put emphasis on the you part when he glanced from Gon to Leorio and state a point.
"In a storage closet?"
"It was the most deserted place I could find!"
"Well. You've been caught. Now get up and let's go." Leorio jabbed a thumb over his shoulder at the open door.
"Go?" Killua pushed himself to his feet, dusting off his shorts with a scowl still aimed at an not-so-innocent, chuckling Gon. "Go where? Why would I go anywhere with you guys? Not after how you treated me before! No way! I'll never go with you-"
"I'm sorry."
Leorio was staring straight into Killua's eyes and the silver-haired teenager stepped back, shocked, mouth parted in a soundless gasp. The dead seriousness in those dark eyes was unwavering. He's not kidding. Swallowing thickly on a lump stuck in his throat, Killua pulled his lax hands into fists at his sides, teeth grit. It irked him for some reason, wondering if Leorio was too great an actor to hold up such a farce. He can't be serious, right? "What the hell are you sorry for?"
"Look, I didn't mean to be rude back there." The doctor amended, his head bowed slightly. "I know how you feel about the other squadron and I wasn't really thinking when I just blatantly ignored you and said those things. So, I'm sorry, Killua."
As Killua made to say something, Gon raised his hand in accordance, waving it to get his attention. "I'm sorry, too! For how I was acting earlier." He moved forward and clapped both hands onto Killua's shoulders and if it hadn't been for the bronzed palms holding him there; Killua would have jumped clear across the room to get away. He started bowing his head up and down in repeat, not stopping for a second as he begun to babble. "And for dropping you like that. And for squeezing you until your face turned blue. And for earlier when I was being an idiot; even though I really can't change that fact, but I'm still sorry! And I'm also sorry too back on the island when I stole and ate your entire bag of chips and ripped your pants in the crotch area so your underwear was showing-"
Killua slapped both hands over Gon's mouth, stifling the muffles of the other teen who continued to ramble on and on despite the new blockage. "G-Gon! S-shut up already!" He stuttered, the tomato red blush catching at the tips of his ears already. He turned his face away to conceal it, hiding the red color under the shadows from his bangs. "I g-get it so s-stop! I get it! I accept your a-apologies, okay? I accept! So shut up!"
"Pahhh." Gon made a sound when he exhaled rather loudly, Killua's hands dropping as he sighed. "Are you okay now, Killua?"
"Am I okay?" He repeated Gon's question and gazed left to right from Kurapika and Leorio and the reassuring smiles they had yet to drop since stepping into this room, and finally landing on Gon who was looking expectantly at him, grinning toothily. The spotlight was still on that head of upright blackened hair, still highlighting him; like a sun that kissed the sky, marking him as something very, very special.
"Yeah."
Infectious, Killua conceded, falling into the same step to match them; smiling himself. Maybe, just maybe, Killua could take a risk and step a little bit in that light.
But, just a little.
"I'm okay now."
"Ne, Killua."
"What now, Gon?"
"Are you happy?"
Killua gaped, swinging around to face Gon who was wearing that typical face-splitting grin and couldn't help but roll his eyes, not staying too long to look less he fall into that trap again. That infectious, disease-ridden smile of Gon's which no human could resist when seeing it at first glance.
You'd be smiling by the end of the day whether or not you even wanted to. It was just how Gon was, spreading smiles wherever he went, bathing any tense atmosphere in the afterglow of his giddy warmth. He was the sun, casting its light everywhere in his reflection and not a shadow in sight.
Killua may always appear disgruntled by this fact, but he was really all too happy honestly.
Gon was contagious.
"Well? Is Killua happy?" Gon pressed when Killua didn't immediately respond, nudging him hard in the side, and the white-haired teen almost wanted to punch him but didn't want to risk allowing Gon the privilege of seeing his steadily gathering blush. It'd give him away too easily to his fluttering, love-struck emotions and he did not need to have Gon's uncanny nosiness to be sniffing its way down his back all the time.
"O-of course I'm happy, idiot." It took him a minute to compose himself and Killua inhaled deeply, gripping at the edges of the roof they sat upon and staring hard at the cold tiles under their bottoms. "I mean, why wouldn't I be?"
"Well, I was just curious, that's all." Laughed Gon, his voice bright, cheery, like bell chimes that caressed your ear drums with its blessed musical tone. Killua would listen to that sound any day over anything else. "I wanted to make sure, because, well, you make me happy."
Blue eyes widened and Killua did swing around this time, irises wide and constricted and totally caught off guard by the bluntness that was Gon. "What..?"
"I'm happy when I'm with you, Killua." Gon said, again, as serious as ever.
"Are you for real? Why? How?" Killua wasn't comprehending the words that reached his head and he had to rub at his temples a few time to clear his muffled thoughts that, too, were struggling to grasp the concept that was 'you make me happy' from Gon. How was that even possible?
Killua killed people for a living. He fought and argued with pretty much anyone and his language was as foul as your grimiest sailors. He had a tongue that wasn't afraid to strike just like his inhumanely shaped claws were more than willing to rip out your heart at any moments notice. He was dressed in red; in blood, and black, like shadows.
Killua was downright dark and dreary. How did any of that translate into happiness?
"Because," Gon seemed to pick up on the others distress and leaned forward, sliding a soft, warm hand underneath Killua's angular jaw line, before pulling him into a small kiss; their lips barely brushing over when Gon pulled away and left Killua sitting there, breathless but not entirely empty of air. "I love you. And being around you, being near you and doing things like this, makes me happy. I know it's been really hard lately but I'm just happy that I have Killua by my side to pull us through. That's all."
Killua pursed his lips together, reaching up to run the tips of his fingers over it, feeling the leftover heat gathered there and swallowed. He couldn't just meet those raw, glittering golden orbs yet, eyes well hidden behind his shaggy bangs. His cheeks were burning now and he knew his face must be as bright as a tomato. "Gon."
"Killua." The black-haired boy smiled, leaning forward again to cup both sides of Killua's speckled red cheeks and giggled, his mouth hovering inches from the others again. "You make me so happy, Killua."
"Y-you're so sappy." Cool, sweet air fluttered over Gon's own lips and he licked them, enjoying the taste of Killua's breath on him. He watched those long eye lashes flutter shut, closing off the dazzling sapphires from view, but he knew they'd open back up sometime and he'd get to enjoy their sight again; never truly gone. "But I love you too, you sappy idiot."
"At least I'm your sappy idiot."
"Oi, Gon!"
"Hahaha. Killua. You're funny." The Zoldyck teen giggled and closed the distance between their lips, sealing them shut for a moment, until they were breathing nothing but each others oxygen, tasting each others flavors, and basking in each others touch. It only lasted a moment, maybe two, when they pulled away again and Killua rested his forehead onto Gon's, their fingers laced together and held tight at their sides.
"Happy Birthday, Gon."
"Thanks, Killua." Gon hummed out and laughed, broad shoulders shaking like they always do when his chest rumbled with cheer. "Do we have to go back to camp and celebrate with the others now, or can we stay here a little bit longer?"
"Hmmm." Killua seemed to take that into thought and pulled away to tap his chin; his acting job worthy enough to look believable that Gon laughed even harder as he watched. "That is such a hard question, Gon. I'm not sure how to answer." He turned his head side to side, humming louder-then-necessary, before he swung around and grinned ear-to-ear at Gon, navy eyes daring. "What do you think? This is your birthday. Do you want to stuff your mouth full of cake and sweets while all those sweaty soldiers cheer and hug you with their gross, smelly bodies as they congratulate you for finally turning 18?"
"Sure." answered Gon and Killua would have just threw himself over the edge of the roof if it wasn't for the fact they were about five stories too high for even their skills to land unscathed. "What? I want to have some cake and sweets. I'm hungry."
"Gon!" Killua whined and did a face palm, hand sliding down his face dramatically. He reached forward, grabbing hold of both of Gon's shoulders and leaned close enough that their noses were smashed together. "Idiot. You're supposed to say 'No, Killua I want to stay here with you!'"
"But I do want to stay here with you, Killua."
"..." sagging until his head thudded against Gon's shoulder and audibly bellied a moan. After a minute of quiet shared between them, Killua spoke again, more confident than earlier. "Does this mean you're okay now, Gon? I mean, after everything that happened before. Are you okay?"
"Am I okay?" Gon blinked, head tilted, then he grinned, tapping Killua's chin back up to level their stare, amber eyes brimming with honey as those sapphire ones rippled like the sea. He leaned in close, one last time, his mouth against Killua's while he spoke, chuckling. "Of course I'm okay."
All too eager to resume their kiss, Killua pressed forward and met Gon half-way; the two settling into each others rhythm as new found strangers fated to meet would do when colliding together in a display of fireworks.
It felt like magic; their chemistry, but Killua and Gon both knew it was something else entirely.
Love.
"I'm okay now."