In this the X-Men aren't dealing with too much life and death situations. They are still fighting against the Mutant Registration Act and they sometimes take down HYDRA when their paths cross but otherwise nothing too big and everyone's alive (because I said so.)
March on, and fear not the thorns, or the sharp stones on life's path. - Khalil Gibran
PART IV: March On
Sam looked over the packed bags on his and Steve's bed. Most were piled in the SUV already; there was really only two more to bring out. Sam sighed, he was still not sure about any of this but then again he was still a little in shock over the news of Steve's pregnancy despite it being four days since they found out, two since they spread their son's ashes. That was still another matter entirely, their son. Not to mention he still wasn't sure he wanted to trust Steve's safety to people he'd barely met and on top of that he had no idea how to explain this to his Mama or what she would say. Sam shook his head, none of this was helping Steve but moving temporarily to Xavier's school would at least take some of the stress from Steve and Sam too if he were being honest. He'd feel better if it weren't just him and Steve alone going away but despite Tony's suggestion that all the Avengers relocate to Westchester County, it would arouse suspicion and possibly bring trouble to Professor Xavier's door.
Sam grabbed his bags while trying not to worry about anything until he had greater reason to. He took the elevator downstairs and walked out to the indoor garage and was surprised to see more bags strapped to the hood and in the back than he or Steve would carry.
"Uh, what's going on?" He asked of Sasha, Bucky, Clint and Natasha who were loitering by the SUV.
"We're coming; we already called the school and made arrangements." Natasha said with no preamble.
"I thought you said you trusted Professor X." Sam answered, putting the bags down and crossing his arms.
"We do but we didn't say anything about the other occupants of Casa de Mutantes." Clint answered.
"Besides, the Professor may not always be the best judge of character. He was best friends with Magneto and according to Wanda and Pietros, their dad is kind of a dick." He continued.
"You and Steve are going there so you can both stay safe. We'll be there to protect you. Besides, do you really think I'm leaving my brother at a time like this?" Bucky said.
"Ditto. Besides Clint's an idiot, who knows what he'll do if I let him loose on those poor people." Sasha piped up. Clint nodded sagely beside her. Sam cracked a smile at that before shaking his head.
"Fine but you guys are telling Steve."
"Telling me what?" They heard behind them as Steve walked over to the car. Sam turned and watched him eye the extra bags and their new self-proclaimed travel companions before he sighed with a shake of his head.
"Just please make sure you respect all of Xavier's rules and don't eat all the food in his house, Clint."
"Me? You're the one eating for two. And I wouldn't worry about this parenthood thing Cap; you already have your 'scolding mom' voice down to a tee." Clint replied. Steve glared at him slightly before walking closer to Sam.
"Are you okay with this?" He asked as he stood close to him to give them some sense of privacy.
"Don't know why I expected anything different honestly."
"Seriously, I'll tell them to stay back if you want." Sam knew Steve would tell them they couldn't come if that's what he wanted but he could see Steve side-eying Bucky with more longing than he knew he was showing and he would feel better if Sasha was with him and more secure with Nat and Clint there. Of course with Clint being there it would mean they would have to put up with him being... him but Sam would still appreciate the company and he knew Steve would too.
"Apparently Nat called ahead to warn the Professor that he just invited a circus into his home so stop worrying about me when I'm perfectly fine. It'll be... well not fun but an adventure for sure. You know me, I love a good adventure. That is if you can keep up?" Steve smirked at him.
"With you? Even pregnant I can run laps around you, honey. Maybe she'll take after me in that regard." Sam groaned playfully.
"God forbid her first words be 'on your left.'"
"Nah, I'll still be on your left. She'll be on your right." Steve leaned in and kissed Sam's cheek before making his way over to Bucky. Sam watched Steve playfully bump his hip against Bucky's who retaliated by grabbed him in a headlock and giving him a noogie. He felt a bit of a leap in his chest but he tamped it down, he knew Bucky was being gentle with Steve and would never be anything else with him after what happened on the bridge and the helicarriers if he could help it. Steve's words rung in his head,
'I'll still be on your left. She'll be on your right.'
Sam was starting to think he wouldn't mind that.
After dealing with Tony's tantrum about not being allowed to go (which was partly based off the fact that he still didn't like thinking the word 'no' applied to him in any measure beyond when Pepper laid down the law) and after 3 hours of driving with rest stops for Steve to go to the bathroom ("It's a part of pregnancy." Sasha had told him after the third stop.
"It wasn't a problem before."
"When they did the surgery they might have moved the baby so she's pressing on your bladder more."
"Great.")
The group finally found themselves pulling up to the back gates of Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. The mansion looked just like it did on the pamphlet. The place was well kept and just had an inviting air about it, never mind all the kids running around (or flying or hopping). When they pulled up Sam could clearly see Professor Xavier, who he recognized from video coverages of the senate meetings, sitting in his wheelchair with two men flanking him. One of them wore red tinged glasses on his eyes and the other, dressed in a leather jacket with some wicked sideburns, was just putting out a cigar. Sam cut off the engine once they pulled up. He heard Steve take a deep breathe beside him before he opened his car door and stepped out. Everyone else took after him and exited the car. Steve took the lead walking the sixsome towards their new hosts with Sam not far behind him. The professor smiled when they were close enough and Sam could tell Steve was smiling back even without seeing his face.
"Professor, thanks again for letting us stay here. You really didn't have to." Steve said, holding out his hand to Professor X. The older man, (younger man? Sam was going to have to check into that) shook Steve's hand.
"It's no trouble, Captain. You've had no need to speak up for my people; you have your own worries as is. Thank you again for your help and support."
"There's no need for thanks, it's just the right thing to do." The two shared a smile between them and Sam was loath to interrupt their moment but cigar guy apparently wasn't.
"Look at you, Sergeant Barnes. You're looking almost sane these days." Sam looked over at Bucky and was surprised to see him grinning. Bucky smiled but to see him actually grinning was a rarity, maybe Steve and Sam weren't the only ones who would benefit from some time away from home and all the trouble and stress that it entailed.
"And you're looking almost sober, Logan." He replied.
"Our lives have taken tragic turns since we last saw each other, buddy."
"So, have you finally asked Storm out on that date?" Natasha asked. Logan began shifting a bit uncomfortably.
"Well..." Natasha and Bucky both looked over to the man with the glasses and the three shared a look at Logan's expense. Sam knew Natasha took Bucky to the Professor to get the triggers out of his head back before he decided he was ready to reunite with Steve but he was wondering just how long they stayed and how many times after that they'd seen the X-men if they were interacting with the two men with such familiarity.
Maybe this will turn out to be better than I thought. Sam thought to himself.
"Perhaps introductions are in order?" The Professor prompted. Natasha took care of introductions on their end and Logan and Scott Summers formerly introduced themselves. Scott was courteous; Sam got that aura from him anyway, while Logan cracked a joke at Steve's expense.
"Guess I can add pregnant man to my list of crazy shit that just proves the worlds gotta be ending soon." He said with a shake of his head and a smirk.
"And you still wouldn't have gone on that date." Bucky retorted teasingly which prompted a hum of agreement from Natasha and a chuckle from Scott. Logan grumbled almost through the whole generalized tour of the mansion. They were directed to their rooms in the same corridor as the teachers' rooms, someone else brought up their bags and the three couples packed out their clothing and relaxed a little before meeting back up with the three men after an hour.
They followed the Professor to the elevators and took them to the basement floor before walking out to a long, sleek, metal themed corridor.
"Storm and Jean are in the lab. They wish to run some tests. They feel the sooner the better." Steve shrugged like he didn't mind but Sam could see the bit of anxiety in his shoulders.
"Of course, Captain. They'll take no more than you permit." The Professor said.
"Thanks." Steve replied with a little smile.
Did I miss something? Sam wondered before remembering that the Professor could read minds.
Does that get as awkward as I think it does? He thought towards him directly.
"It can Mr. Wilson, but thankfully I've trained myself to block out certain thoughts automatically." He replied.
"You mean sex thoughts?" Clint asked in an unnecessarily loud voice.
"Clint... I swear I will." Sasha said. Sam wasn't sure what she was implying and he didn't want to know though Xavier did smirk so he must know what Sasha threatened Clint with. They reached the lab just then and Scott held the door open for them all to enter. There were two women in the room which was set up like a hospital room. Sam recognized Dr. Grey-Summers as the one who was taller with long red hair that was a duller shade than Natasha's fiery mane. The other woman, who he assumed was Dr. Munroe, was on the shorter side with caramel toned skin and short white hair in a pixie cut with sky blue streaks. They both turned from their conversation and smiled as the group entered. Nat and Bucky immediately stepped forward and greeted the two women warmly with hugs and kisses to the cheek then they introduced themselves as well.
"Thanks for doing this Storm and Jean. I didn't expect either of you to take time out of your schedule for me." Steve said as he sat in the chair in the middle of the room that seemed smaller with 10 people in it.
"You don't have to thank us Steve. We aren't just going to have you stay here and fly through this pregnancy completely blind." Storm said as she hooked him up to a heart monitor.
"We can't say we'll have all the answers because this is a first for us but we may at least be able to give you some closure and make a plan of how to treat you and make sure that you and the baby are healthy throughout the rest of this pregnancy." Jean said reassuringly while turning on a machine as Storm continued hooking up wires to Steve's skin. They took blood samples and saved scans of his brain and vitals.
"Did you have an ultrasound before?" Storm asked.
"I was hooked up to a fetal heart monitor when I woke up after…" Steve trailed off then. Sam reached forward and grabbed his hand.
"Anyway the fetal heart monitor was also a 3D ultrasound so..."
"3D ultrasounds, weird things aren't they? Makes your baby look like something out of sci-fi movie. Not the most comforting things to stare at, right?" Jean stage whispered to Steve. Steve looked at her with a bit of surprise before giving her a small smile at her understanding. Sam figured Jean probably knew from experience since she and Scott had a son together.
"How about a real ultrasound, the way they're meant to be?" Steve looked up at Sam but Sam just smiled at him in a way that he hoped told him he was leaving that decision up to Steve. He hadn't known that he felt uncomfortable with the 3D ultrasound though he knew he wasn't really comfortable with being pregnant at all so he wanted as much of this to be under Steve's control as he could get it to be.
"Yeah, yeah I'd like that." Steve said. Storm patted Steve on the shoulder while Jean pulled over another machine and applied something to the wand. Storm walked closer to Steve and kept a comforting hand on his shoulder.
"You don't mind, do you?" She asked indicating towards his shirt. Steve pulled his shirt up and pushed his pants down lower on his hips.
"It's going to be cold." Jean warned. Steve indeed did jump a little when the wand was placed on his abdomen and after Jean moved the wand around she seemed to find what she was looking for.
"There we go." She pressed a few buttons on the ultrasound machine while she and Storm scrutinized the screen.
"Well… it's definitely a girl. Looks about five months along, healthy and normal from what I can see." She flipped a switch and a thump thump thump filled the room.
"Is that…?" Bucky asked.
"Her heartbeat. It's strong, that's good. We'll go over our blood tests and scans but right now it looks like she's doing very well." Storm answered.
"I won't tell you don't worry while we wait because I know from experience you will but do your best to relax, that's the whole point of you staying here anyway." Jean told him as she pressed a button. Storm walked over to a printer and pulled some photo paper out of it. She handed one to both Steve and Sam and then gave one to Sasha and the last one to Bucky. Sam looked down at ultrasound. He could definitively see her head and her little body. It was real before but seeing her again made his chest swell with emotion. Steve squeezed his hand tighter and Sam reciprocated the touch. There was that feeling of contentment welling up in him. He felt anticipation as well and fear at what would happen when their daughter did finally arrive in four months.
Four months? That really wasn't a very long time from now and there was so much to do, so much to get done, so much to consider. Would he and Steve stay at Avengers Tower or would they get a house for their family themselves? Would they continue to actively be Captain America and The Falcon? Where would that fall within their lives with their daughter? Would she be normal or different due to Steve's genes? Would they ever tell anyone how she was conceived? What could they even say about her origins in public?
"Do you guys have any questions we can answer for you right now?" Storm asked.
I have so many and I have no idea who can answer them. Sam thought, looking up. He felt eyes on him and when he looked over the Professor was smiling serenely at him.
You can handle this. He heard a voice in his head say and he wasn't completely sure it was his own but it still made him feel calmer. He looked down at Steve and he was caressing the edges of their daughter's outline with his finger. He was still holding Sam's hand but his grip was more relaxed now, he seemed relaxed. Whatever problems or challenges that was to come they could face it as long as they were together, it was something Sam was going to have to remind himself of but it did make him feel better.
"I've got a few questions." Clint said in a tone that just spelled trouble.
"Clint…" Sasha started warningly.
"So from my experience aren't pregnant people supposed to be a little heavy in the stomach area? How exactly is Steve going to squeeze that puppy out? Will baby freebird be kicking ass with super strength? And what about Bucky?" Clint listed off.
"What about me?" Bucky asked with confusion.
"Well, Betty says the serum was what caused Steve to be pregnant. Does that mean that you could pop a kid in your oven too?" Bucky's eyes widened comically enough for Sam to chuckle even though he probably shouldn't have. Steve hit his shoulder a little but there was no real intent behind it, besides everyone was chuckling a little.
"I don't exactly have the parts to knock him up but thanks for the concern, Hawk." Natasha said drily, then she seemed pleased.
"Still if we do decide to have kids James it's nice to know I've got options." Bucky looked over at her wide eyed and a little fearful as she looked him over with interest. Sam shook his head and turned to Jean as she began speaking.
"Every pregnancy is different and low weight gain and minimal stomach growth isn't as uncommon as you would think. That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the baby, it just something that happens sometimes. As for the birth itself, Storm and I were talking and from what was sent to us there isn't a viable birth canal. That can happen in women as well. So the solution would be a cesarean section." Jean said.
"More surgery." Steve didn't sound very happy but understanding at the same time.
"We can talk more about that later on. We'll know more once we get our own tests results back." Sam nodded. He supposed that's all he could hope for.
Later that night Sam and Steve were in their room at the school. After they left the lab they were introduced to the student body en mass. He wasn't sure if they knew the truth but it seemed that they were at the very least knowledgeable that Steve had been helping to fight for their rights and they seemed excited to meet some of the Avengers. After the meet and greet Steve was exhausted so he went up to their new room to get some sleep, Sam joined him after an hour or two of exploring the grounds. He wasn't really sleeping, more dozing than anything else when Steve spoke.
"We need to tell your mom." That shook any lethargy right out of him. He turned over to look at Steve.
"I know." Sam answered.
"Do you want to tell her?" Steve asked. Sam could hear the insecurity in his voice, the doubt. He wasn't sure if it was doubt in himself or in Sam or in the situation itself but it made Sam smile reassuringly.
"My mom has been waiting for grandkids for about a decade now. Even if this isn't exactly the way she expected I don't think she'll have a problem with it. Besides, she adores you. There go those baby blues at it again." Steve smiled widely at Sam's words and the fact that he could pull Steve out of himself made him feel warm (and it had nothing to do with how hot Steve ran.)
"Thought you said I wasn't smooth." He pointed out.
"As sandpaper but that's part of your appeal." Sam replied before moving forward and kissing Steve. Steve pulled him closer to him by the waist, pressing their bodies flush against each other.
"You know this is what got us here in the first place, not that I'm complaining." Steve said as Sam began kissing his throat. Sam pulled away from Steve's neck and kissed his lips one more time before pulling away from him completely.
"I'm going to go call Mama and tell her to get on video chat. I don't want to say it over the phone, don't know whose listening." Sam jumped out of bed and heard Steve move and turn on the lamp. He walked to the closet and pulled his cellphone out of his jacket pocket. When he turned back Steve was starting to lean over the mattress to pull Sam's laptop case from under the bed. Sam felt himself jumping forward before he even knew it. He pushed Steve back upright and grabbed his laptop from under the bed himself. When he stood up Steve was glaring at him disapprovingly. It wasn't a look he got a lot but it wasn't something he liked to be on the receiving end of.
"We have another four months to go before she is born and I am not going to put up with you coddling me or not letting me do things myself." Steve had the expression on his face, the one he got when he would not be moved on an issue. Steve's independence was something that he didn't want to ever be taken from him in any way and Sam understood that but he also knew that sometimes Steve didn't value himself. He didn't think he'd ever put their child in harm's way and their son's death was in no way his fault but he instinctually wanted to make sure Steve was okay. He didn't want him to do anything and it end up hurting him or her at all, he couldn't deal with losing either of them. Steve seemed to see the jumble of emotions and he softened a bit at the edges but not in his resolve. He reached out and grabbed Sam's hand.
"I know you want to protect me, protect us, and I know I probably don't have a lot of your trust right now because I didn't tell you the truth-"
"Steve, that's not—"
"I should've told you the truth from the beginning but I'm not going to do anything that's going to put her in danger. This may be strange and it all feels completely out of body but I do want this. Is that… strange? To want this?" Sam leaned down and kissed Steve.
"It's not strange, I want this too. I'm glad I get to have it, to have her with you and only you and… I will do my best not to take away your independence or make it seem like you can't do things for yourself."
"I guess that's the best I can ask for." Sam sat down next to Steve as he opened the laptop and after a quick phone conversation with his mother, they were staring at her smiling face.
"What's with the mysterious summons? Though I have no complaints, four months is much too long to go without seeing your faces." Sam smiled and he could feel Steve relaxing more beside him.
"Does there have to be a reason to want to see your gorgeous face, Mama?" Sam said. His mom gave him the look and he immediately felt like he was 15 years old again and had been caught with a group of boys breaking into the old abandoned house to drink alcohol together. Steve seemed to know that and chuckled while patting Sam's shoulder.
"We really do miss you Darlene. It's been way too long." Steve said.
"Yes it has but are you deny this isn't a social call?"
"Well, there's something we need to tell you. We wanted to do it face to face... in a manner of speaking." Steve and Sam looked at each other and collectively took a deep breathe but before either could say anything Darlene began squealing.
"Oooh, please tell me what I think you're going to tell me."
"Depends what you think we're going to tell you." Sam said carefully.
"Did one of you finally get your act together and propose?" She asked. It wasn't an invalid assumption. They'd been together for four years, things were at as much of an equilibrium in their lives as they were going to get at the moment and Sam had even discussed their plans for the future with her so them getting married was no stretch of the imagination and begged the question whether or not they would get married before or after the baby was born.
"Actually that's not it exactly. Look Mama, there's no way to say this and not sound crazy but Steve's pregnant." Darlene stared at them like they'd grown two heads (not wholly impossible at this point) then looked completely confused.
"Did I miss something?" She asked, looking like she was going over every conversation they ever had in her head.
"No. I am a man but the serum I got gave me more to work with than I bargained for." Steve said nervously.
"I'll say. So nine months from now-"
"Four months, I'm already five months along."
"Samuel David Wilson and Steven Grant Rogers you better not mean you waited five months to tell me I'm going to be a grandmother."
"No Mama, we just found out not even a week ago." Darlene suddenly started smiling widely and laughing.
"A baby..."
"You're not mad?" Steve said with confusion. Darlene looked confused too.
"Why on earth would I be mad? God gave you one of the greatest gifts you could ever receive. I'm just happy you get to experience this, I'm glad you'll get to hold your baby one day. When you hold that bundle of blankets in your arms and you see yourself in that little face the whole world's going shift and no one will ever be able to take that feeling away from you." Steve and Sam both smiled. Sam would admit to being nervous over his mother's reaction but she took it a lot better than he thought she would.
"So, boy or girl?" She asked excitedly.
"Girl. There was a boy too but..."
"Oh. Oh baby I'm sorry. I know what that's like. Sasha had a twin but I miscarried her at four months. Now don't you blame yourself, Steven. Sometimes things happen and there's nothing we can do about it. You never forget but don't dwell on what could've been and forget what you do have." Steve nodded at his Darlene's advice and Sam was glad that he seemed more willing to listen to her when she said it wasn't his fault.
"There's so much to do! Shopping, gotta set up a nursery, ooh a baby shower. When's the wedding? You are getting married, right?"
"We hadn't talked about it yet, Mama."
"Well, there's no reason not to." She was right but Sam wanted to do it right and he didn't want Steve to feel obligated to say yes just because he was pregnant. Before either could say anything Sasha burst into the room without knocking.
"You know one day you'll see something you don't want to." Sam commented.
"Nothing I haven't seen before." She said looking at Sam before sliding her gaze over to Steve.
"And nothing I wouldn't mind getting another look at." Sam could feel Steve grow hotter as he blushed.
"Girl, you better stop." Darlene said. Sasha ran over to the bed and plopped herself between he and Steve.
"Hi Mama! Or should I say grandma."
"Speaking of, when are you going to give me a grandchild?"
"Mama..." Sasha whined while Steve and Sam chuckled.
"Or at least a wedding."
"I thought you didn't like Clint."
"I never said that, you assumed that so you try to keep us from spending more than five minutes alone together. And you know what…" Sam tuned his mother's tirade against Sasha out as he began to think on her words. Should he propose to Steve? And if he did, would he even say yes?
Well, there's goes my good night's rest.
'Now things are going to get a little difficult but remember to breathe. Everything's gon' be alright. Just breathe.' He remembered from his dream of his Nana.
I'm trying but it's hard, it's really, really hard.
He had a feeling it would get harder before it got better.