"I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive." - Tim Allen

PART VI: Good Lies

"I name you and this how you repay me." Sam heard Steve grumbling as he passed him by with no acknowledgment from the kitchen to go to the bathroom. Another month into the pregnancy found Steve's bathroom breaks even more frequent as Saralise grew larger. He was getting more annoyed and surly these days with the mood swings and his stomach was larger now but he looked more four months along rather than seven. He was experiencing a lot more cravings as well, particularly for macaroni and cheese for some reason which Sam could see Steve had apparently been making a hulking pot of. The pot was so big you could cook a ham in the damn thing never mind it was 10 at night. Sam had gone looking for Steve when he woke up and noticed him gone but he figured he'd find him alone in the kitchen so he was a bit surprised when he walked further into the kitchen and saw there was six students sitting on the chairs surrounding the stove with clean bowls waiting to be filled. Sam recognized them as the students who didn't physically sleep at all. He always worried about that but Xavier said their mutation allowed for it and he trusted Professor X so he let it go.

"Hey kids, keeping my fiance in check?" He asked, ruffling the curly brown hair of a boy who he was sure he saw talking to an owl once and the owl seemed to understand.

"Yes, Sergeant Wilson." The kids chorused.

"Captain Rogers says he'll watch a movie with us after we eat." A small five year old wearing a hijab said radiating so much excitement that her skin began to literally turn red. It was a testament to how much shit he'd seen over the past decade that Sam didn't even freak out when she changed colors like a living mood ring.

"Will you watch with us, Sergeant Wilson?" A teenage boy asked, his lizard tongue slipping out briefly not unlike a snake.

"Eh, why not? Sasha has 'Brave' on DVD." He said walking to the fridge and grabbing the apple juice from the fridge as well as eight glasses from the cabinet and pouring some juice out for everyone including himself and Steve. He didn't dare touch the macaroni, Steve got really possessive about his food. Just as he finished pouring out the juice Steve returned and greeted him with a smile and a kiss.

"You staying?" He asked. Sam shrugged and picked up the girl in the hijab, who had returned to her usual brown skin tone, and placed her in his lap before sitting. Steve smiled again, guess he was less grumpy now that he'd (momentarily) relieved his bladder. He began dishing out the macaroni to the kids who gratefully accepted with a wide smile at Steve, Sam passed on the offer sticking to his juice. Steve sat between a boy whose eyes changed color every time he blinked and a preteen girl whose mutations Sam couldn't tell by looking at her. They all ate chatting comfortably. The kids asked them about their adventures as Avengers, about the baby, about what Steve's life growing up circa 1920s-1940s, they even asked questions about their school work. Sam looked at Steve and he seemed perfectly at ease talking to the kids. Steve was good around kids it was babies he was always awkward with but Sam saw him holding Nathan a few times and seemed to get more comfortable being around babies which was good because it'd be unfortunate if he couldn't hold their kid until she was two years old.

Once the kids finished eating and drinking Sam sent them and Steve out to the living room while he washed the dishes. Once he finished he went to the living room and smiled as he saw the kids had all piled around Steve on the large couch but left space for him. He slipped in next to Steve and cuddled into his side. The lizard tongued teen slipped under Sam's arm and cuddled into him while Steve started the movie. It struck him this was what he had to look forward to. He could see himself, Steve and Saralise cuddled up on their own couch enjoying a movie and their time as a family together and it was all he wanted, it was all he could think of. What Saralise would look like, who'd she look like and what finally having her in his arms would be like. But no, that wasn't entirely accurate. He also spent nights laying awake wondering what would happen after. Someone would undoubtedly notice a baby at Avengers tower eventually and depending on how she looked they'd put two and two together. From what discernable features her brother had they would eventually have a problem and if anyone found out Steve's genes were in her she'd be sought after by virtually ever government agency that existed. If people didn't believe Steve was her biological father perhaps she'd be safer. She'd still be sought after being the child of the Avengers (because honestly everyone was going to have a hand in raising her) but maybe she'd be safer if it wasn't widely known that she possessed supersoldier genes. He had thought about perhaps telling the public that they got a surrogate and used Sam's sperm, he had thought about running the idea by Steve. Of course they'd need to find a woman who looked enough like Steve and who would stay quiet about the truth but it was all very premature at this point. The fact remained that they needed a plan and needed it quickly.

Sam looked around the decorated party room of Avengers Tower with surprise. He was expecting Tony to go overboard with this baby/wedding shower. The man didn't know what toning down meant, a Stark trait as he understood it, so really the set up was a surprise. There wasn't any gaudy pink streamers or balloons proclaiming Saralise's gender, no giant sculptures or statues like he'd expected and thankfully the cake wasn't shaped like a baby (though according to Bruce it wasn't for lack of trying), the ballroom was decorated generally as if it could be the host of any event. The caked was three tiered and said 'congratulations' but not for what. There was around 70 guests including all the Avengers, some SHIELD agents along with Phil and the team, the X-men were there with a majority of the students attending as well as some of the workers of SI. The whole event reeked of a modesty Tony wasn't capable of so of course when Pepper came gliding into the room it all made much more sense in his head.

"Steve! Sam! It's so good to see you guys. It's been too long." She said making a beeline for them and pulling them into a hug.

"How was everything at Stark Industries overseas?" Sam asked once they pulled away.

"Nothing I couldn't fix."

"Don't I know it."

"I'm not here to talk business, I'm here to talk about the little one. Congratulations. I'm so happy for you guys." Pepper bestowed them both with a kiss to the cheek.

"You guys figure out a name yet?"

"After much debate and nearly inciting a civil war we settled on Saralise, after Steve'd mother and my grandmother."

"Saralise, that's such a beautiful name, unique."

"Weird Pep, that's the word you're looking for. It's weird." Tony commented while strutting over to stand next to the CEO who rolled her eyes.

"That actually wasn't what I was looking for but thanks Tony."

"Of course it was because it's a weird name, Pepper's just too nice to say so."

"Times like this make me wonder why the thought I missed you ever crossed my mind." Steve commented.

"Missed him or missed his shower?" Sam asked.

"Hmm, you're probably right." He replied ignoring Tony's indignant huff.

"At any rate Tony, when do you plan to propose?" Steve asked.

"Do what?" He asked as if he'd never heard the word before.

"You and Pepper have been together longer than me and Sam, you're practically married already. Why not make it official?" Sam looked over at Steve while Tony sputtered intelligible noises. He had a twinkle in his eye, he was messing with him on purpose.

"I don't know what- I mean I- who let Dum-E and Butterfingers serve wine?"

"You did." Pepper reminded.

"Why on earth would I do that? Better go fix that, bye." He said hastily before practically running away much to the trio's amusement.

"That's what he gets for making fun of my daughter's name." Steve commented before turning Sam.

"I am going to the bathroom then I'm going to look for some mac and cheese." Steve said before kissing Sam's cheek and sauntering off.

"He buys macaroni more than a kindergarten teacher." Sam joked before turning to Pepper she was laughing but there a glint in her eyes that said she wanted to talk to him but didn't want to do it there. He offered her his arm and let her lead him away from the ballroom.

"How are you really, Sam?"

"I'm alright Pepper. Anticipating when she's finally here."

"And not worrying about what comes after I'm sure." She said giving him a look that clearly said it was no use lying to her as they boarded the elevator.

"I mean of course I have but Steve doesn't need the stress, not after the miscarriage, so I haven't brought it up."

"I know about the ideas you've been throwing around. Professor X told me." Sam didn't even get upset about his thoughts apparently not being private anymore though he was a little annoyed and Pepper could see it.

"He wants you all safe just as much as we do, he thinks he owes Steve for speaking up for mutants. Of course Steve would disagree but that's how he feels. Coincidently, Charles and I had been discussing one of the plans that crossed your mind." She said before stepping off the elevator and leading him to the kitchen where Charles was along with a woman he'd never seen before.

"How's it hangin, Snap?" He was a little taken aback by this stranger calling him by his nickname and addressing him with such familiarity, he didn't recall ever meeting her.

"Your mask, dear." Xavier reminded.

"Oh right." Sam watched her press a on her earring and then pull a photostatic mask off her face.

"Sharon!" He exclaimed happily. She hugged him back tightly.

"Sorry, been undercover so long I forget I'm wearing the damn thing." It had been a year since he or Steve saw her. Despite she and Steve's previous dating history they were all friends. They fought together enough, side-by-side, through some rough times that no pointless pettiness could survive. He hadn't known she was undercover but he had thought a mission kept her away, it was nice to see her.

"Did you take time off your mission just to come here? You didn't have to, Sharon." He said as they pulled away.

"I just closed my mission actually and when Pepper called and told me the news I had to see you guys." She said with a smile, Sam smiled back before frowning.

"What does this have to do with our cover story? Are you helping coming up with whatever it is Pepper and the Professor have been cooking up?" The Professor rolled forward then.

"Actually that's what we wanted to talk to you about, Sergeant. One of your thoughts in particular got me thinking and Ms. Potts and I agreed it would be the best story to all our bases." Sam looked at them curiously.

"We want to tell the public that you and Steve got a surrogate and that you were the genetic donor. That way, in people's minds, Steve's genes and the serum aren't directly tied to Saralise's DNA. Of course we couldn't just get anybody for that, we need someone who looks enough like Steve and won't turn on us for any reason. I was talking it over with Sharon and-"

"And I volunteered to be your 'surrogate'."

"Sharon…"

"Look, it's perfect. I've been underground during this whole pregnancy, no one's seen me so they can't say I wasn't hidden away somewhere pregnant with Captain America and the Falcon's baby. You guys don't have to worry about paying me off and I'll be in her life anyway."

"What about Tripp? You have your own relationship to worry about."

"I already talked with Tripp about it and he thinks it's a good idea, he isn't against it at all. You and Steve are my friends, it's the least I can do for you guys." Sam sighed looking between the three of his friends.

"I haven't even talked to Steve yet."

"Then you should, talk to him about this and if he says yes Charles and I will take of the rest, you won't have to worry about anything." Pepper said with understanding. Sam smiled a little at her.

"Thank you. All of you, really for putting so much thought into this and trying to help protect Saralise." He said nodding before walking back towards the party. Yes, he had put some thought into that scenario but now that he was faced with it he didn't know how Steve would take it. Would they have to lie to Saralise to in order to protect her? Yes, Sharon did look vaguely like Steve – blonde hair and blue eyes—but would that even be enough to fool people? When he got upstairs he noticed the music was different, more classical than the dance party music that had been playing before. He noticed most people were residing on the dancefloor now. Steve was dancing (mostly swaying in a circle) with Jean, Natasha and Bucky were as criminally graceful as always as glided around the room outdancing everyone else with their simple waltz, Bruce and Betty were wrapped up in each other's arms swaying along, Sasha was dancing with Bobbi, and the two were obviously talking about Clint while the man in question complained about the fact that his ex-wife and current girlfriend were being civil with each other and not going 300 on the others' ass while he tried to unsuccessfully cut in and he could see Logan dancing with Storm. He wondered how he managed to make that happen. Every one of the people in this room were such a huge part of his life and they were going to be huge in Saralise's life as well. Was he about to ask all of them to lie to her too? Did the ends justify the means? He'd do anything to protect the ones he loved including lie. Really, at this point the decision was up to Steve.

"Thanks Sam." Scott said as the two of them finished loading up the students in the van to go back to the school.

"No problem man."

"You guys sure you wanna stay the weekend?" He asked. Despite what they intimidated to Tony, Steve and Sam had missed the other Avengers and had decided to stay the weekend at the tower.

"Yeah I'm sure. Steve's not showing that much. Besides Tony still has some baby/engagement gift to show us. I don't think I ever thanked you by the way." Scott had helped a lot when Sam was trying to figure out how to propose to Steve. He'd kept him calm and gave him the advice he'd needed.

'It feels like climbing Mount Everest now but you love each other, you're going to be a family and when he says yes it's going to feel like the best word you ever heard in your life. Trust me, it'll be fine.' He had said and it had kept Sam from bouncing off a wall.

"You don't have to thank me, Sam. I'm just happy for you." The men smiled at each other before Scott patted his shoulder and got in the front seat of the van. The passenger seat window rolled down before they pulled away.

"Until Monday, Sergeant Wilson. I do hope you discuss the matter with Captain Rogers as soon as possible." Professor Xavier said. Sam nodded before watching the group drive off. The second van passed by with Jean waving out the window and Sam watched until he couldn't see the vans anymore. He turned and walked back towards the house, the breeze blowing soothingly across his face. When he entered the house and went into the common room on the main floor all his housemates were there talking and joking amongst themselves, catching up.

"I seriously think Tony might be more excited for this baby than any of us." Pepper commented.

"My excitement is at a perfectly acceptable level."

"Tony you took paternity leave." Rhodey deadpanned. Steve rose his eyebrow at Tony.

"I had other things I needed to focus on. Speaking of, good of you to finally come back Wilson. Now I can finally flaunt my superior gift giving." Tony said standing with a smarmy look on his face.

"I'm not sure I want to know but at the risk of getting a head ache..." Sam said, trailing off as he attached himself to Steve's side. Tony motioned for them to follow and they did as Sasha looped her arm through his. They went up the escalator to Steve and Sam's floor and followed Tony towards a bedroom that they didn't use.

"Brace yourself for awesomeness, Plebians." He opened the door with a flourish and waved them inside. He and Steve went inside first and couldn't help but gasp a bit. The room had been turned into a fully equipped nursery. The floors were carpeted in royal purple. There was a crib that looked like it cost a thousand dollars against the wall with a name card reading 'Saralise' above it and a mobile with planets hung on it. There was a changing station already stocked with diapers, powders and wipes. There was two dressers and a closet all of them were open showing they were fully stocked with clothing. Sam spotted three different baby bags hanging off hooks next to the closet. Off to the far right was a playpen with a about ten stuff animals inside along with baby rattles and other toys. Suffice it to say Saralise would not want for anything.

"Tony, you didn't have to do all this." Steve said, Sam could hear the emotion in his voice and was pretty sure it wasn't hormones.

"'Course I did. Also these walls are this plain white for a reason. JARVIS, project the nightlight please."

"Certainly sir." Suddenly the lights went down and the walls and roof was scattered in real life stars. A ball of light flashed past the wall just next to Sam while he stared in awe. The planets soon appeared and the stars shifted a bit showing a condensed version of their galaxy.

"Nice isn't it. Jane helped me condense it so they all fit, even Pluto because it is a planet thank you very much." Sam grabbed Steve's hand and squeezed it. He had never dreamt of being able to provide this much to his child, he was sure Steve felt the same way. They're child would not be spoiled and unappreciative of the small things in life but it did quell the child inside of him who watched his mom struggle to pay bills before she fell in love with Sasha's father.

"The kitchen is stocked with baby formula and bottles so don't worry about that either. Also I brought you twenty boxes of macaroni and cheese so go crazy, Capsicle." The lights slowly turned back on while the space illusion faded. Sam saw Steve wiping at his eyes discretely but didn't mention it.

"Thank you, Tony." Steve said with a hint of a smirk. Tony hated being thanked for anything ever, it was a house rule. As Sam expected Tony immediately balked at his words.

"You said the words. The forbidden words, to me. You said- Pepper he said-"

"Tony say 'you're welcome'." She ordered.

"But Pepper, there are rules against this. No one is allowed to do the thing, and he did the thing." He whined.

"Tony..." Rhodey said giving him the look. Tony looked at Bruce for help but he stared at him with the same look Pepper and Rhodey had.

"Fine, fine. You're welcome. I'm going to eat you Mac and cheese for this." Tony said, crossed his arms across his chest and huffing like a kid.

"Not if you value your hands, you're not." Steve said sweetly. Sam kissed his cheek because he was so cute when he was making thinly veiled threats. Tony's present did cross off a lot of worry from Sam's list but there was still the matter of bringing up Sharon's proposition to Steve.

The next morning Sam sat with Steve in their kitchen in the Tower watching Steve's face carefully for signs about his reaction to Pepper, Xavier and Sharon's offer. He seemed contemplative, which meant he was considering this and was weighing the options.

"She volunteered herself?" He asked.

"Yeah, she's just coming off a deep cover op that's been running as long as you've been pregnant so people can't actually say where she's been."

"So she could've been off on some remote island pregnant with the Falcon and Captain America's baby - not mine biologically, so no serum. Knowing Pepper we'll come out about in an interview, probably a month after we're married so we can explain her existance and we'll minimize the suspicion and controversy if it seems like we've been married awhile. It's a smart plan. Could probably work." Steve said as calmly as if they were discussing a plan of attack and he supposed they were but he was a lot calmer about this than Sam expected. Even Steve without raging hormones would have usually been hesitant to consign to a cover story that invited lies they couldn't take back into their life. That's why he was a shit spy (or so Natasha, Bucky and Clint said).

"I'm surprised you're considering this with little to no convincing." Sam said, drinking a sip of tea (because whenever he drank coffee Steve glared daggers at him and looked at the cup longingly so he decided in the interest of comfort to drink strictly tea or orange juice as his morning beverage of choice until Saralise was born.) Steve looked over at him and looked like he was searching for words.

"I... know I've been critical of anything but the raw truth in the past but it's not just us we have to worry about it's her. After what happened to our son I'm not going to let anything hurt her even if we have to lie to the public about it. I can do it, it's for Saralise. Besides I'm glad it's Sharon, I wouldn't trust some SHIELD handpicked agent with this and Xavier and Pepper's on board so why not? It's better than any plan I've come up with." Sam looked at Steve with both equal parts surprise and understanding. They both shared the need to protect Saralise from any harm but he knew Steve' s hatred of lies. Steve must've noticed his skepticism because he chuckled before leaning over and kissing him.

"I mean it, it's fine. I'm fine with it Sam. Pepper and the Professor will handle everything else, right?" Sam nodded his head and Steve smiled at him.

"Then that's that. I'm relieved actually. I've been trying not to think of what comes after but it's hard." Sam nodded in understanding. He couldn't keep Steve's mind off stressful things 24/7, it was impossible because he was Steve but at least now they would both be able to put this particular worry to rest.

"Pepper and Charles will have to debrief the whole team and I'll need to tell my mom but I think it'll work." Steve nodded and squeezed his hand before scooping up some macaroni (because apparently it was no longer a food relegated to lunch and dinner) and eating contently.

"I wonder what Peggy will say." Steve commented but didn't seem like he was waiting for an answer. Instead of puzzling at his behavior Sam just thanked god that it was as easy as it was, hopefully it would be this easy when they did finally publically come out with whatever story they concocted. Sam brushed his thumb over Steve's engagement ring and took a deep breath in.

'Everything's gon' be alright. Just breathe.'

That's slowly getting easier everyday Nana.