Hank rolled his eyes, blew out a breath, then nodded and stood up. "I guess we'd better get this over with, whatever it is." He strode toward the day room, followed by Marco and Mike, then paused and raised an eyebrow at them. "I think I'd better handle this alone, fellas." He gestured with his head toward the arriving squad. "Better wait a couple of minutes until I find out what this is all about. Tell the others, but give me a chance to diffuse what might be a nasty situation."

"Sure, Cap," Mike replied, returning to the mop.

Marco shrugged, and lounged against the wall, watching as Roy backed the squad in beside the engine. He nudged Mike. "Looks like Chet and Johnny aren't talking to each other. Maybe I'll drive the squad to Rampart next time, just so they can get a break from each other."

Mike tilted his head to the side, considering. "Maybe… or maybe they'd go nuts if they didn't have a chance to harp at each other. Tell you what: you fill them in while I get this finished, then you and I can sneak in, and let them follow a couple of minutes after us."

Marco grinned. "That ought to get them to talk to each other again, just to try and figure out what's going on." He walked toward the squad, and explained the situation. "Remember, give Mike and me a minute to spy things out before you barge in there."

"Why can't we go in now?" Johnny replied. "I didn't do anything."

"Are you sayin' I did?" Chet demanded.

"That's why you should wait," Marco said. "You're still mad at each other, and this is a more 'delicate' situation."

"What about me?" said Roy. "I'm totally innocent of… whatever is going on."

Marco pointed at Chet and Johnny, still arguing in the front seat of the squad. "You're elected to referee, Roy. I'm sure not gettin' involved in this, and you already know what's going on with these two!"

-E!-

Hank put on his most charming smile, and walked toward Mrs. Van Doren with his hand outstretched. "Hello, ma'am. I'm Captain Stanley. How can I help…" he broke off as the box on the table moved. He stared at it.

"Captain, I'm here to hope that you're ready to right this terrible wrong and take responsibility for this dreadful transgression," she stated, giving him a cold stare. "I believe my letter stated things clearly."

"Uh… not really, ma'am," he replied, reaching behind his head to rub the back of his scalp. "I mean… my single men don't know anyone named 'Dora', and I'm sure that my married men…"

"What on earth would this have to do with your men being single or married?" she demanded with a puzzled and angry expression. "I ask you!" she shrieked, reaching into the box and holding up a golden-haired puppy with extraordinarily long ears. "Does this look like a Golden Labrador Retriever to you?"

Hank, swallowed, taken aback by her aggressiveness. "Uh, ma'am, uh…"

Mike and Marco slipped in, their smiles wry at observing their captain's discomfort. They moved unobtrusively into the kitchen, pretending to focus on coffee while actually listening to the exchange.

"WELL?" she demanded, thrusting the puppy up into the captain's face. The puppy gazed at him with sorrowful eyes, then licked Hank's chin, his tail wagging. A small yipping bark issued from the puppy's throat. He washed Hank's chin again with his tongue, his paws twitching in the air.

Mike covered his mouth in a desperate attempt to smother a laugh, and succeeding in choking on his own spit. He started coughing uncontrollably.

Marco slapped the engineer on the back, ostensibly to help Mike's coughing spasm. In reality, he was grateful for the opportunity to conceal his own facial expression behind the taller man. Wow, Cap is really rattled. She's making him as nervous as McConnike does!

Chet, Johnny and Roy came into the day room, and paused, their eyes swivelling from the barely controlled smirks of Marco and Mike, to the faces of Hank and the angry woman. "We're back," Chet said with a shrug.

The woman whirled, and her eyes narrowed as she glimpsed Chet. "YOU!" she growled.

Chet's eyes widened, and he took an involuntary step backward. "Uh… hello?" He tried a friendly smile, then gulped, his half-smile fading in an instant.

She pointed the index finger of her free hand at Henry, lying on the sofa, then lifted the puppy at Chet in an unspoken gesture of accusation.

"Uh… ma'am… I can explain," he said quickly, clearing his throat. "Uh… it was only once…"

She stalked toward him, swinging the puppy. "Once is all it takes, or don't you even know basic biology?"

"Look, it was an accident," Chet mumbled, his hands raised in a defensive posture. "Who knew that Henry could move that fast?"

Mrs. Van Doren stared at the Basset hound on the couch, who gave a yawn, rolled onto his back, and then settled back into his nap. "It looks like that's the only thing he's ever done that was fast," she snapped. She turned back to Chet, and thrust the puppy at him. "This is yours." She pointed at the box with three other puppies curled into soft golden balls. "And so are those." She sighed, and crossed to the door. Her voice quavered. "And somehow, my poor darling Dora will put this unhappy episode from her life…" She opened the door, paused on the threshold for dramatic effect, and snarled, "Forever!" as she left.

Mike coughed a couple more times, then let his laughter escape – but no sound came out. He pointed at Chet and the puppy he was clutching, then at Henry, then at the box of puppies on the table. A thin wheezing escaped the engineer, as he doubled over, leaning on the counter for support, tears pouring down his cheeks.

Marco's laughter was anything but silent. He walked over to the table, picked up one of the sleepy puppies, and cuddled it, chuckling loudly all the time. "You know, they are pretty, uh, 'interesting-looking' dogs… not a Golden lab, for sure, but certainly not all Basset hound. They have their, er, father's ears and eyes, though."

Hank rounded on Chet, who was trying to sneak out of the room with the puppy. "Perhaps you have something to explain, Kelly?" he asked in an icy tone, crossing his arms over his chest and lifting his right eyebrow almost into his hairline.

"Uhmmm. Well… I, sorta borrowed Henry a few weeks ago…" Chet began.

"For what?" Hank snapped.

Chet squirmed, absently patting the puppy in his arms. "Well… there was this girl…"

"Don't say anything more," Hank replied with a sigh, rolling his eyes as Roy and Johnny started to snicker.

Chet's expression was earnest. "No, he was fine… it was when we were walking in that park a couple of blocks away, and she let her dog off the lead…"

"So you just had to follow suit, right?"

Chet shrugged. "You wouldn't have known it was Henry, he moved that fast…"

Marco put the puppy back into the box, leaned over and laughed louder. He glanced over at Mike, who was still convulsed in silent laughter, and pounding on the counter. Marco snickered, but his grin faded as he stared at the engineer.

Mike's face was red, his shoulders were shaking uncontrollably, and his mouth was sagging open.

"Roy!" Marco called, as Mike started to sink to the floor, gasping for air. "Breathe, Mike!"

"Gage, get the oxygen!" Hank called as he and Roy moved to assist their engineer. They eased him to the floor, alarmed as his colour changed from red to white, tinged with blue lips. His eyes rolled back in his head, then his eyelids closed as he passed out.

-E!-