You Can Live: Chapter 44

Yay! New chapters are always so much fun! :) PS There be action here!

I do not have a beta. Any and all mistakes are my own!

Disclaimer: you know I don't own HP. A very rich, brilliant lady does.

Warnings: Much angst in this chapter!

Confrontations

Harry felt exhausted. He ached down to his bones and his eyelids were as heavy as bricks. The thoughts in his head were buzzing and he couldn't quite remember what had happened. Starting slow, Harry twitched his fingers. When that worked, he methodically began flexing and testing each muscle. He could tell that he was on a bed, on top of the covers. That alone brought back flashes, and suddenly his heart was pounding and he was fighting to sit up and run-

"Calm down, Harry. Everything is alright. You're safe." Harry felt someone slide his glasses on, and he was met with his guardian's concerned gaze.

"S-sir, what..?"

"H-Harry.." Harry's whole body froze and locked up when he heard the broken voice of his friend. If his heart wasn't racing before, it certainly was then. Very slowly, he turns his head and saw Ron, Draco and Hermione standing at the foot of his bed. Draco's face was a cold mask in comparison to Ron's barely concealed anger. Hermione's hurt the most in the pain he read there, like he had burned her favorite book right in front of her. However, he didn't really know why they were so angry and upset.

"Guys-" Harry had twisted his body and leaned on his arm. He winced and looked down. He saw the bandages and suddenly he couldn't breath again. They knew. They had seen. Harry struggled to drag in air and soon found himself hyperventilating. He couldn't- He couldn't-

"Harry, you need to calm down. Listen to my voice. Breathe with me. In and out. In and out." Harry listened to the calm voice as best he could, but it still took him a good fifteen minutes before his breathing started to really calm down and his vision cleared up. He could finally see that it was Severus who had put his arms around him. Any other time Harry would have stayed where he was, but now that he knew, what had happened, what he was….he couldn't. Harry, as gently as he could, extricated himself from his guardian and brought his knees up to his chest.

The others in the room did not miss Severus's pained expression, but did not comment. A heavy silence fell over the room, as no one knew how to start. Albus ignored the awkward tension and hopped over to his master. He landed on Harry's knees and pecked him on the head.

Harry couldn't help the side of his lip quirking up and lifted a hand to pet the bird. Keeping his eyes on Albus, Harry spoke.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just…I didn't know how…" Albus nipped his fingers in affection. "I thought I got a handle on it, then it…just started back up again."

"What do you mean it just 'started back up again'?" Harry flinched at Ron's harsh tone, but missed the glares turned on the red head by Draco and Hermione and Severus.

"Ronald! Stop it." Hermione desperately wanted to pull Harry into a hug, but wasn't sure how that would be received. "Harry, no one's mad at you. Truly. If anything, we are mad at ourselves for not noticing you were hurting and for whatever circumstances pushed you to…this." Harry's head flew up, and his eyes widened.

"No! It's not your fault. I swear. I-I just…There's something wrong with me and-" There was a sudden uproar from everyone in the room, and Harry shrunk into himself.

"Quiet!" He heard his guardian bark. Then, much more softly, "Harry, there is nothing wrong with you. You are not crazy. We talked about this. But everyone in this room cares about you and we don't like seeing you hurt." Harry bit the inside of his cheek, but nodded like he believed his guardian wanted.

"Why don't we all go downstairs to talk? I for one could use some tea." Harry could not help but snort at Draco's drawling 'request'. While the blond held his pinched expression and cold demeanor, Harry could tell his friend was uncomfortable. Ron looked ready to open his mouth and start a fight, but Harry started to move.

"Y-yeah. Let's do that." HIs limbs still felt heavy, and it seemed that Albus did not want to lose contact with him. With a sigh, Harry settled him on his shoulder and then made to stand. Severus caught his arm when he nearly toppled over, but Harry quickly pulled away as if burned. Dirty dirty no touching no touching! Harry could not bare to see the look of disgust he was sure was on his guardian's face and quickly made to exit. He could already feel a strong urge to cut and was trembling with the strength he was using to combat it.

Ron reached out to touch his arm but Harry flinched so violently he nearly dislodged Albus who let out an indignant squawk. Harry winced at his reaction and mentally berated himself.

"S-sorry." With that, he quickly left the room before he could embarrass himself further. He could hear the others following him after a moment's hesitation. No doubt Hermione elbowed Ron to keep him from putting his foot in his mouth and Draco and Severus probably shared some sort of knowing Slytherin look.

Still when he reached the living room, the others were quick to file in. Harry shoved himself into one of the armchairs, leaving the other for Severus and the couch for his three friends. Lord of the Rings still lay on the coffee table next to the brand new journal Severus had given him. Part of Harry wanted to fill pages of the book right then and there, but the other part was terrified to relive his memory/nightmare/dream…whatever!…even in written form. He didn't want it to be real. He just wanted it all to go away.

Draco watched as his friend curled up into the smallest ball possible as far away from any of them as he could get. In all of their years together as students, enemies then friends, he had never seen Harry so…afraid. If he could catch Harry's green eyes for more than a second, he would also see the intense self-disgust and loathing.

"Snippy." The house-elf popped into the living room at the sound of Severus's voice. When the three friends of young Master Harry had arrived, Snippy had left them all to give them a bit of privacy despite her own concern for the young boy. She looked expectantly at Harry but the boy only gave her a weak smile.

"Snippy, please bring us all some tea." Her Master also sent a pointed look at the younger Master, in effect telling Snippy to also have Calming Draught handy should the need arise. Snippy nodded hastily and was gone in a blink. Before the silence became too overwhelming for Harry, the house-elf returned and laid out the tea. The three on the couch reached for their own, while Snippy personally handed Severus and Harry their cups.

Albus had transferred from Harry's shoulder to the back of his chair making it easier for the boy to lean forward and accept the warm drink. He made sure to give Snippy a grateful smile in hopes of reassuring the small creature that he was…alright. Tea in hand, all occupants stalled for a few moments, trying to figure out how to start.

"There is obviously a lot we don't know. Severus, I take it you don't understand what happened upstairs either?" Draco set his tea down and the others on the couch followed his example.

"That is correct." The Potion's Master looked to his ward, silently asking if the boy wished to explain. Harry barely met his gaze, but Severus took his silence as permission to continue. "After we returned here from the party, I re-dressed Harry's cuts. We discussed everything and came to an agreement. When he fell asleep on the couch last evening I took him up to his room and stayed there. This morning, I awoke to find Harry fighting a vivd nightmare, and when I woke him up…he panicked, backing himself into the corner of the room." Harry had curled up into an even smaller ball, as his guardian spoke of him. After a brief pause, Severus continued.

"I couldn't calm him down…and then Harry's bird started to fly about and screech at something. When I looked there was nothing there but…I could sense a strange magic in the room. I cast Revelo and something formed. It appeared as a Shade in the form of a man. It charged, passing through myself and then Harry. Harry's wild magic responded, blasting myself and Snippy back. That was just before you found us." If all eyes weren't on Harry before they were after Severus's explanation.

"Harry? Please. What happened?" Harry's eyes were clenched so tightly shut he wasn't sure he would be able to open them again. Try as he might he couldn't get words out of his mouth. He still couldn't get his thoughts in order; how was he supposed to explain it to his friends and guardian?

Suddenly there was a knock on the front door. Severus's hand immediately went to his wand. The wards had not gone off…again.

"All of you stay here." Snape stood and slowly made his way to the door. The three on the couch got their own wands ready, their eyes darting between the entrance Snape had left out of and Harry barely breathing in his chair. They were all startled when Albus flew off the back of Harry's chair and up the stairs. The bird's movements sparked Harry into motion, and he realized with a start that he didn't have his wand on him.

They heard Severus reach the door and all held their breath.

Snape meanwhile, approached the door slowly and cast a scrying spell. He was met with the image of an unsettled Minister of Magic. Severus kept his wand ready and carefully opened the door.

"Severus! I have terrible news concerning Mr. Potter! Please, can I come in and talk to you." Severus however did not move aside or open the door further.

"Why didn't you use the floo, Minister? That is your preferred method of travel." Minister Shacklebolt paused as if about to explain himself, when his serious expression dropped and he started laughing.

"Oh Severus Snape. You got me. Though I was hoping I would at least get in the door the easy way." The 'Minister' abruptly shifted into smoke and blasted past the Potion's Master. The…Being…flew into the house and towards the living room. Just as it was about to pass the threshold, a screech barreled past.

All four young wizards were on their feet the instant they heard Severus open the door. Hermione noted that Harry didn't have his wand and moved to stand by his side. Her friend looked equal parts determined and terrified. Whatever or whoever was at the front door suddenly broke past the Potion's Master. Before whatever it was came into full view, however, Albus came careening through the opening and dropped Harry's wand into his outstretched hand.

Snape ran around the corner only to find four wands pointed back at him and no one else in the room.

"Where did it go?!" Everyone stilled and slowly looked around the room, braced for an attack at any moment.

"Now isn't this funny?" Harry froze at the voice beating on the back of his neck. He couldn't move. He couldn't breathe…and then he felt fingers slowly running down his spine.

He whipped around and blasted a Stupefy- into nothing.

"Harry!" The young wizard ignored the cries of his friends as he searched frantically for Menos. He then heard the man laughing on the other side of the room.

"They can't see or hear me, Sweetie. Only you can. Wonder why that is?" Harry felt a deep, burning anger roiling up from inside him and another blast came from his wand and struck thin air. He screamed in frustration.

"Harry, mate, where is it?" Again, Harry ignored Ron's outburst.

"Hmmm, crazy and a slut. I like it," the sickly voice rasped in his ear.

"Shut up!" Harry lashed out with his fists, hoping to connect with something.

Severus and Draco meanwhile, were watching Harry. Whatever was in the room, they couldn't see it, but Harry could. They locked eyes and communicated silently. Harry's whole body language would change in a moment, quickly followed by an attack at seemingly nothing. If they timed it right…The next time Harry tensed, one cast a Revelo and the other cast a solidifying spell.

They all suddenly found themselves face to face with the Shade. The man scowled at Severus and Draco, before smirking at Harry and winking out of existence. Severus was not at all surprised that he recognized the man as the 'Muggle' from town that made Harry uncomfortable. His obvious non-Muggle status also partially explained how he did not set of the ward alarms the first time.

However, rather than dwell on this fact, Severus rushed to his boy's…Harry's side and steadied him before he fell over. It seemed that whatever adrenaline that had kept the boy up on his feet and fighting had run its course. Harry flinched away from the touch, but dumbly allowed himself to be herded into a seat.

Before anyone could say anything, the floo activated. All on their feet had their wands at the ready…when who but Luna Lovegood stepped out. She took one look around and then offered a small, airy smile.

"Sorry I missed it. You did wonderfully."

Moving right along, yes we're moving right along... :)

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