Ceremonials
Chapter 9: Heartlines
'How do I do that?' Warren asked.
It was seriously sad and screwed up that Warren needed instructions on how to let someone in, how to make someone part of his life, how to share. It just about broke Layla's heart. On the other hand, she knew how to do this. This was as natural to her as breathing. Carefully, she made a suggestion.
'You could start by, I don't know, telling me something you haven't told anyone before? It has to be something significant, though,' Layla explained.
Warren looked at her without seeing her, seemingly searching inside for something that met the criteria. When his face became pained, Layla knew that he had found something. Only the thought of opening up could bring that expression to his face. A mixture of anger, reluctance and, most of all, fear.
'I own this place,' Warren confessed.
'The apartment?' Layla asked, confused.
'No. Yes. The restaurant too. I bought the whole building,' he clarified. Did this count as important? Layla didn't think so. It appeared to have very little to do with Warren as a person or the two of them as a couple.
'Why?' she inquired. Warren swallowed, as if to postpone the moment that he'd have to give her the reason for deciding, out of the blue, to buy a rickety apartment and a Chinese restaurant. That's how Layla guessed that it was important after all.
'It's where we started. You and me. This where we first… This is where I fell in love with you.'
'That's good. That qualifies. Definitely,' Layla stammered, filled with joy. She smiled at him. Warren didn't return the smile. He was too busy looking like he expected to be slapped down and ground into the dirt, like a bug. It made something in Layla's chest clench. When she made no attempt to crush him, verbally or otherwise, he looked surprised. Surprised, confused and relieved.
'What did you think would happen, Warren? Did you expect me to laugh at you? Use this against you in some way?'
'I don't know,' he admitted. 'I know that I expect the worst of people. And I know that I feel uncomfortable telling you this. I'm not good at whatever it is we're doing now. I don't enjoy being…'
'Vulnerable?' Layla supplied. He nodded.
'It's not easy for anyone. It's not easy for me either. There's always the chance that someone will betray you or hurt you, but you can't let that stop you. I think that, in order to get to the heart, you have to cut through that fear,' she told him.
'What a thing to do!' Warren exclaimed.
'But on the other side of that, there's love, sometimes,' she replied.
'You,' he said.
'Me,' Layla agreed. You, she thought. Us, she thought. They looked at each other and Layla swore later that she could see him do it. Right then and there, Warren made the decision to let her in. To let her love him. They still had a long way to go, but that day they took the first step towards a better relationship.
'That's more than you deserve,' Layla joked, aware of the fact that she was quite possible ruining their moment.
'Maybe that's true. Maybe I don't deserve you,' Warren admitted. 'But I want you. I love you and I want you and I will work for it. You know, I always thought that it wasn't about what fitted, because then you'd be with Will. I thought what mattered was that two people worked. I promise you that, this time, I will do my best to make us work. I will do whatever it takes to make you happy again.'
'About Will…' Layla began.
'He's your best friend,' Warren interrupted.
'He is. Well, he was,' she corrected. Warren shook his head.
'He is. You'll make up.'
'You won't make me choose? Because I won't do that,' Layla warned.
'I won't, but I do think that you should talk to him. He's your friend, but he's also in love with you.'
'I know. I'll talk to him when I'm ready,' Layla said. 'For now…'
She drew Warren closer by his hands - her palms against his palms, their heart lines entwined - and kissed him. Warren can do this, she marvelled. And, more importantly, he was willing to do it. Prepared to overcome his fear and let her in. They stood a chance to finally be a real couple. To become a family.