You're the Northern Wind
Sending shivers down my spine
You're like falling leaves
In an autumn night

-City and Colour "Northern Wind"

Her cellphone vibrated on the counter and Andy checked the caller ID.

"Good morning Henry."

"Morning'." He said on the other end of the phone. "How is Eva?"

"She's fine. She's eating well and sleeping as much as can be expected."

"Good, good." He paused, "I have news." He said and immediately Andy sat up straighter in her high chair at the kitchen counter.

"Oh?" She was impressed. Hardly a week in and progress already? 'Well he always was an 'on the ball' kind of business man despite being a drunk.' Andy mused.

"Yes. Stephen Clarke is a bigger crook than I thought. This guy is dangerous Andy… Are you sure you want to do this?"

"For God's sake Henry just tell me." Andy growled impatiently.

Henry sighed heavily then said, "He's involved in a high level embezzlement scheme."

"What?" Andy gasped. "How?" She'd expected drugs or alcoholism or past cases of abuse but not this

"I'm not sure yet. But its big Andy." She heard him clear his throat, then he said, "This man has more connections and money than either of us. We'll have to involve the law, and it will have to be public if this is going to work."

Andy's eyes shut and she clenched her teeth. "If we can do this without involving police that would be best." If they did, the media would no doubt get involved and the media circus would rage around all of them. It could be troublesome.

"I can't promise that. I can try to stay anonymous if that will help, but if you want this guy taken down, you will need the law backing you on this."

"Alright." Andy conceded. "If you can find proof that he's involved in the embezzlement, enough to get him fired and maybe get some jail time. That will be enough."

"What?" Henry squawked in a choked voice. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?"

"I am aware of the risk I'm taking, Henry."

"If the law finds out that we are involved in any way with this, we would be finished, Andy. Completely finished. Do you realise that?" Henry was practically yelling now.

"Henry." Andy snarled, "If you won't do what I've asked, our deal is off."

That calmed him right down. "I— you fucking—" he stuttered furiously. "Alright. Damn it Andy. I'll do it."

"Good." Andy hung up.

She sat at the counter, still as a stone for a long while. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, like a drum. Her coffee grew cold.

She didn't care.

Andy'd always known she was capable of doing whatever was necessary to protect those she cared for but she'd never been made to go this far before. Fear sunk its teeth into her and she felt crushed by the sudden rush of emotion.

She was risking everything. The company. Miranda's wellbeing and her daughters'. Eva's safety.

She looked down at her hand. They were white and shaking.

She felt her chest tighten and her breathing speed up. She couldn't get enough air. She was panting, and she felt every muscle in her body tense up.

Then the tears came. She couldn't breathe. She was almost hyperventilating. Her nails dug into her forearms and she forced herself to take gasping breaths.

The pain in her arms helped her focus on the here and now. Beverly could walk in any minute and see her here, having a panic attack. That wouldn't do. She had to calm down.

After a few more minutes of forcing her breathing to calm down, she finally stopped crying. Her breathing regulated itself again. She stood up stiffly and went to the sink to splashed water into her face.

She hadn't had a panic attack since she was a teenager.

Andy took deep breaths, dumped the cold cup of coffee in the sink and then poured herself another cup of coffee. She was glad to be able to indulge in caffeine again.

She sipped at it grateful for its warmth. She felt chilled to the bone.

Andy reheated, then finished the coffee and went to check on Eva, who was still sleeping, thank goodness. She then went to the bathroom and cleaned herself up, got dressed and applied a fresh coat of makeup. She finished applying her nude lipstick carefully, then Andy heard the knock on the door.

She hurried to the front hall to open it. Miranda was early for her session, as per-usual. She opened the door to see Miranda in her Gucci sunglasses, and cream trench coat standing at the door expectantly.

"Hello Miranda." Andy murmured trying to keep her voice steady. She still felt a bit shaken by her conversation with Henry. She didn't know how much she should tell Miranda about it.

"How are you?" She asked brusquely. Miranda was obviously in no mood for mincing words.

"I'm well. So is Eva." She paused and let Miranda in the hall, taking her coat. It felt strange to think it had been so long since they had had a session.

"Would you like to meet her?" Andy asked glancing at her hesitantly.

"I—" Miranda started. "Yes, I don't see why not." She replied tersely, removing her sunglasses and putting them in her purse. Andy smiled and hung her coat in the closet, before leading the way to the nursery.

Beverly sat in a chair, reading a book while keeping an eye on Eva. Andy nodded to her and Beverly smiled and said, "She's awake right now."

"Hello darling." Andy whispered as she looked into the crib.

Eva was in her crib, gurgling quietly. Her eyes were wide and a deep blue colour. She couldn't really focus on much yet, but she enjoyed the dangling toys placed above her crib.

Miranda stood in the door frame for a moment, following Andy's lead. Then she moved closer and stood at the edge of the crib to look down at the infant lying there.

"She's lovely, Andrea."

"Thank you." Andy replied with a tense smile.

Andy still had nightmares quite often and she was sure there were dark circles under her eyes that no makeup could fully hide. Miranda looked at her child with an inscrutable expression. Andy held back a chuckle. She would probably never be able to read Miranda well , no matter how well they got to know each other.

"Let's go downstairs." Andy said, cupping her daughter's cheek gently before heading out to the hall.

Miranda followed close behind and asked surprised, "Downstairs?"

"Mmm, I had to move the studio to the lower level. Paint is not good for Eva's lungs."

"Oh, of course." Miranda murmured. There was an awkward silence, as they went back to the main hall. Once in the elevator, Andy took the liberty of searching Miranda's face for any signs of pain.

"Oh stop that." Miranda snapped, unexpectedly. "I'm fine."

"Are you? Really?" She asked, not at all convinced. Andy wanted to make sure that she was, but she knew Miranda would rip her head off for just asking. Which was why she hadn't asked. They still stood on thin ice with this topic. Andy didn't know how much she was allowed to know.

"Yes." She rolled her eyes. "He's on a business trip in Shanghai for the weekend."

Andy didn't need to ask who 'he' was. "Oh." she said awkwardly. "Good."

Miranda sniffed at her lingering expression of concern.

Andy took a step closer, but the elevator doors dinged open and instead she led the way to the studio. The space was similar but not exactly the same. She still had the wall of windows, which let the light in perfectly. The leather arm chairs had been rearranged and her work table was still as cluttered with papers as ever.

"Please, have a seat." She said, gesturing to the arm chair. Memories of the last time they had done this invaded her mind and she found herself picturing Miranda on the floor, with tousled hair, her mouth parted in a soft gasp.

She quickly pushed those thoughts away. Now was not exactly the time. The painting was important to Andy, she had to focus… but it was no longer her first priority. She supressed a sigh.

Andy let Miranda get settled in, while she set up her easel and paints.

She saw Miranda try to emulate the position they had used before and Andy knew what would come next. She could see it in Miranda's eyes.

Andy came forward to pose her. She waited for Miranda's nod before letting her hand cup Miranda's jaw to guide her into place. She felt Miranda flinch slightly.

"Miranda." She whispered. Andy watched her shut her eyes, and felt her jaw tense. She shivered under Andy's touch.

"Don't." she said through tight lips. "I can't stand people fretting over me."

Andy suddenly felt overwhelmed by how much she had missed her. Her barbed comments, the glances that meant so much more, her voice, and those damnable eyes of hers.

"I know that." She brushed her thumb over Miranda's cheek bone, and tilted her face up.

Miranda opened her eyes and Andy saw a flash of concern. Andy leaned in slowly and watched as the grey blue eyes closed again and Miranda sighed into her touch.

Andy pressed her mouth to Miranda's softly, putting all the tenderness and longing she felt for this woman into her kiss. She gripped Miranda's nape pressing more fervently. Miranda sighed and parted her lips slightly, an invitation to deepen the kiss. Andy took her chance and tilted her head accordingly. In that instant Andy dared to hope for more than she had ever hoped for.

Miranda's hands found her hair and threaded through the dark brown strands holding her there for a moment before pulling away gently.

Andy wanted to lean in for more, to see if she could maybe—

"I can't." Miranda gasped. Andy froze for half a second, then nodded.

Andy saw Miranda was just as breathless as she was. Her eyes were glazed and her lips trembled ever so slightly.

She wasn't ready. Andy should have known that. And if she was being honest with herself, neither was she, really.

She took a moment to study her face, the angles of her brow, the shape of her eyes, the irises and their shifting ocean colour, the way her hair curled just behind her ears, her bangs which fell onto her forehead and were just long enough to brush aside. The corners of her mouth which sharpened when she smiled, the strong lines of her jaw, and the length of her lashes.

She looked intently at all the features which are best observed at a close distance, committing it to memory so that her painting would reflect the truth of her.

Hopefully, her portrait allow the viewer to sense the awe she felt looking at this beautiful woman.

Andy let their foreheads touch briefly before straightening.

Miranda looked at her and raised an eyebrow, the remaining flush still clinging to her cheekbones.

"If only you could see what I see when I look at you." she murmured letting her sincerity colour her voice.

Miranda scoffed but smiled indulgently.

Andy frowned but thought 'I'll fight that battle another day.'

She was just glad Miranda hadn't been hurt— but doubt nagged at the back of Andy's mind. It had been a while since she'd seen her, who was to say he had not beaten her since then? She felt the frown on her face before she could stop herself.

Miranda glared at her as though she could read her thoughts. "Stop."

"But—" she tried to say.

"No, Andrea. I thought I'd made myself clear. I will not tolerate being pitied. Especially not by you. I thought we had agreed not to pity each other."

Andrea sighed. She knew Miranda was right to reprove her. "I'm sorry. You're right."

"I understand that you are concerned but I do not appreciate it."

Andrea nodded meekly.

"Don't look so sullen." Miranda said, with a sly smile. "I'm here aren't I?"

"Yes." Andrea replied. "And speaking of which, I should get to work."

She positioned Miranda gently but swiftly into the portrait's pose and then went to easel.

She selected a playlist on her iPhone she thought Miranda might enjoy. Mostly a collection of instrumental, calming music, some from unknown artists, others from the classics.

Andy thought she saw Miranda sigh almost imperceptibly.

Andy hardly ever saw Miranda outside of these short sessions. She knew of her reputation as a ruthless business woman, and she knew just how busy she must be. Andy remembered what it was like, being completely swamped when she had been running the company.

She imagined that running an international multi-billion dollar fashion magazine must be a similar situation.

Andy set herself to the task of outlining Miranda's shoulders and neck. She let the music play and advanced on the portrait with as much care and skill as she could muster.

After nearly a half hour, she called for a break. Miranda stood up and rolled her shoulders slightly.

"Tea? Coffee? Water?" Andy offered, as she flexed her own shoulders then rolled her wrists and stretched the muscles in her hand.

"No, not right now." Miranda replied. She pursed her lips thoughtfully for a moment. Then she jerked her head in the direction of the canvas. "May I look?"

"Of course." Andy said and stood up from her easel so Miranda could come stand beside her to see how the portrait was progressing.

So far, she had her jaw, neck and shoulders outlined and the beginnings of her brow and the edge of her hair. Andy knew it didn't look like much yet. But it was a slow process and she wanted to be certain it was as accurate as she could make it.

"Hmm." Miranda said. Andy's eyes widened. 'What on earth did that mean?' she thought worriedly.

"Do you not like it?" she dared to ask. She could have kicked herself for it. She wanted to know but at the same time, she didn't. What if she really wasn't pleased? What then?

"There isn't much to like about it yet." She quipped raising an eyebrow at the painting.

Andy barked a laugh. "True enough." Andy admitted. "I work slowly. But the detail I achieve is worth the time it takes to create it."

"I'm sure." Miranda said, with a hint of sarcasm.

Andy hmph'd. She would do her damned best to make portrait exactly like Miranda so that once it was done, she would be satisfied.

Then she gathered her courage and said, "Miranda…I need to talk to you about Stephen."

She saw Miranda's shoulders tense. Andy bit her lip. She really wished she didn't have to do this but she did. It was important for her to know.

"What about him?" She asked immediately on the defensive.

"I've discovered some information." She hedged.

Miranda's lips thinned with displeasure but she didn't tell Andy to stop talking. 'Oh God.' She thought.

"Incriminating information." Andy said despite her misgivings. Miranda inhaled through her nose sharply. Andy could see her jaw tensing and wished she could make this easier for everyone involved but she also knew it wasn't possible.

"I have reason to believe he's involved in an embezzlement scheme."

Miranda shut her eyes and swallowed hard.

"I thought it would be best to inform you before I went any further."

"Do you have solid proof yet?" She asked cutting to the quick.

Andy shook her head 'no'. "But I will soon enough." She hoped. Henry was generally quite competent when he had the right motivation. Ok, maybe generally was too much of a compliment. But at least she knew he was motivated.

Miranda looked out the window and swallowed hard again.

"I wanted you to know because if you have any involvement in it unwittingly, you had better get out of it as soon as possible. Get you financial advisers to go over everything with a fine toothed comb. If this blows up, and it might, you need to be beyond reproach."

Miranda turned away to glare at the window now and it looked like she was biting the inside of her cheek. Andy could practically feel the anger rolling off her in waves. Towards Andy or Stephen, she didn't know. Damn it. She wished for the millionth time she could simply have Stephen killed and be done with everything but she would never say anything of the sort to Miranda.

"I'm sorry." She said, almost meekly.

"Sorry? You're sorry?" Miranda barked. "If anyone should be sorry it's—" she snapped her mouth shut trying to contain her rage.

Andy was at a loss. She did not know how to help Miranda in this instant. She didn't have the right words for this. So instead she reached out and touch Miranda's hand. She immediately gripped Andy's fingers tightly enough to hurt, still not looking at her.

"Can you put me in touch with a few people at Elias-Clarke who would have reason to— dislike Stephen? People who might have access to his financial files particularly?"

Miranda loosened her grip but did not let god. She nodded once.

"Thank you." Andy breathed, relieved to see Miranda calming down, even just a bit.

"I'll have Emily email you the names." she said stiffly.

Then she let go of Andy's hand. "Let's get back to it."

She went to sit again in the arm chair, and looked at Andy expectantly.

Andy gave her a small smiled and began to pose her once more for her portrait.

-TBC-