"Do you know how far this has gone?
Just how damaged I have become?"
- Trent Reznor
Five Days Later
Quil dragged his body to the small river, bringing water to his dry lips, he groaned at the ache inside.
After he released his fury on the female vampire, he ran. Away from La Push and familiarity, losing himself in vengeful acts. Before the Newborn battle, he did not think such darkness lurked beneath the surface. Only a slight, luminescent piece of him lingered… his child imprint...
Fate, however, had a twisted sense of humor when it came to his destiny.
The day he bit the Swan girl, those tentacle-like cables of his imprint gently thrummed, and loosened their vise grip on his heart. Every hour since then, he felt the snip of his ties to Claire… until nothing remained. The last attachment to the toddler vanished not long ago, and with it, his body fought against the release. He did not belong to an imprint anymore.
It hurt.
Far more than he imagined. A sense of loss smothered him, threatening to steal the very breath from his body. A battle ensued within; life versus death… a choice had to be made. So, he struggled against it, determined that this was not how his life ended.
He was never meant to be intertwined with the child.
The animal stirred at the oncoming void. Territorially pacing, clawing at his skull, bombarding him with images of ivory skin, blood stains, and brown eyes. Binding him to the act of the mark, twisting him to its will… He pushed back, forcing to reminisce of anger and violence against the undead that she welcomed with open arms. The hazel wolf would not be deterred; gaining his attention by bringing more anguish as the binding reinforced itself… Commanding that he live, for himself… for her... the chains tightened around him. The girl his best friend loved became his reason...
Quil hated himself. This craving for the selfish girl vexed him. It should not be there; this devouring, incessant urge to take from the fragile human.
Not so fragile, though, is she?
She obliterated Jacob. Tormented his heart. Pushed him away, only to pull him back in. Such wickedness should not be allowed to thrive. He'd tasted the remnants of the parasite's scent when her blood rushed onto his tongue.
The lifeless creature had no more claim to her. And, if the tick dare test him, there would be no place on earth for it to hide.
He shivered in the feel of hatred… the inherent knowledge, and power to kill pricked at him deliciously...
He rolled over, letting the leaves and twigs dig into his back. He searched his soul, rummaging through what became a blackened, stained wisp of humanity, and found that he did not want to harm her. No more physical pain shall be thrust upon her; for she has done more damage than any vampire or shifter could ever hope to do.
Oh, she will learn the error of her ways. Penance - if it can be called such a thing.
He knew, just as he understood the beast's yearning to take and claim, he would return to La Push. Raising himself off the grass, he took one last look around his refuge, then jogged between the surrounding red woods, and headed home.
It was time to face the consequences of his actions, and do what must be done.
(Lyric from Song, Even Deeper, by Nine Inch Nails)