This chapter has some mild violence and stuff

Day 1 of the rest of their lives

Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like.

In the direct aftermath of their fight with Kurt, Dib found himself wondering if things would ever go back to the way they were. Gaz had gone back to Kurt's base with the police. She said she was done playing with idiots. Dib was slightly irritated that Gaz was nominated for an award despite his and Zim's hand in everything, but he supposed she deserved it for saving their asses.

But things were different, especially between himself and Zim, who was being very cold and distant since their victory. Not that they'd been particularly close before, but they'd been civil, and besides, before this at least they'd seen each other, and been rapt in the hatred they revelled in when they fought, which was more than they had now. Now, Dib never saw Zim, and if he was lucky enough to bump into him when out of the house, he would avoid Dib with an air of indifference that made his stomach turn. There were no more fights, no more scheming, no more plans of world domination, just silence. It was driving Dib mad, and tonight was the night he was going to do something about it.

Obviously Zim was hesitant to fight with him because during their time in quarantine he'd warmed up to him, Dib reasoned. Though Dib hated to admit it, he'd grown accustomed to sharing a close proximity with the little green alien, and had begun to enjoy his presence. Now that he was gone however, life seemed a little duller than usual, and though Wild horses wouldn't drag it out of him, Dib missed him. He slipped on his jacket, grabbed his keys from beside his laptop, and made his way downstairs.

The walk to Zim's was short and brisk, the cold night air filling Dib's lungs. Street lamps casting menacing shadows that danced over the frosty brick buildings, making them sparkle. Dibs mind raced his heart, each competing to be the fastest. He had no idea what he was going to say. How would he even begin to bring up a truce, a comradery, an alliance, without swallowing his pride and admitting how he felt? His only reassurance was his conviction that Zim would want the same. It was nice to have someone on your side, Zim must think so too? After all hed been alone for so long, he must get lonely too.

Before he knew it, his foot nudged against the first defence gnome in Zim's garden. Most of the gnomes had broken over the years. Zim had repaired them time and time again, before finally giving up and upgrading his defences. A loud screeching noise filled the night, and the front of Zim's base erupted in lasers that aimed straight at dibs head. The loud mechanic voice of Zim's computer boomed out:

"Identify yourself"

Dib gulped, hoping he was still registered as an ally in Zim's computer. If not? Well…

"Dib Membrane" he said.

"Intruder detected, prepare for annihilation"

Dib panicked, had no way to counteract the computers attack. This was supposed to be a peaceful mission so he'd brought no weapons with him. It was too far for him to run to the edge of the garden, the lasers would get him by then. No, he only had one option.

"ZIM!" He yelled

Zim was already opening the door when he heard Dib shout. His insides twisted as he threw the door open. He couldn't let his computer destroy his Dib.

"Computer, hold your fire!" Zim said, appearing at the door, looking rather flustered.

Zim tried to make his manner and voice as hostile as possible. He had to cut ties with the human. Dib could see he was stressed, his antennae lay flat along his scalp. Dib swallowed.

"Zim."

"What do you want earth pig?" He demanded.

"Gaz told me you carried me home" he blurted out. "Thanks"
Zim folded his arms and said nothing.

"Right." Dib continued "I have a proposition."

"And what do you propose?"

"I propose a permanent alliance between us. No more dirty-fighting, no more back stabbing, just- friends. We make a great team and you know it."

"Never" Zim spat "I will NEVER BETRAY MY TALLEST!"

"Zim, the mission they have you on is fake! It's a fake fake- FAKE!" Dib sputtered "you don't need to follow their orders anymore! They're not coming and if you'd just stop trying to take over the planet we could, I don't know, get somewhere!"

Zim hissed quietly, and suddenly the atmosphere was hostile. You could cut it with a knife. And time seemed to slow for a minute too thick like treacle and slow moving. It seemed like a whisper of leaves rustling on the pavement, a short intake of breath and the time it took a cicada to sing one note of his eternal song for it to happen, and suddenly the world spun back into motion. Zim had unsheathed his pak legs and had flung dib round, and pinned him to the wall.

"Listen carefully dib" he snarled, his voice terrifyingly steady and calm, every last ounce of his insane speech inflictions had melted away to reveal a steely voice that made Dib fear him like never before.

"You will not come near Zim, you will not come near Zim's base, and you will not interfere. We are not friends."

And that was it. Those four words somehow hurt dib more than the metal that was digging into his flesh. He felt his stomach drop out. Why had he wanted to be friends with Zim anyway? Why was he so surprised by this outcome? Why? Why did it hurt? Why did he care? He hated zim. He hated him. He hated hated HATED- and the words found their way out.

"I hate you Zim. I hate you! I hate YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATEYOU IHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATE YOU ZIM! I HATE YOU!"

Dibs breath caught in his throat, pure rage bubbling just beneath the surface. And suddenly Zim was close, he was so close.

"Listen to me human," he hissed into dibs cheek "you are a worthless pig. Zim hates you more than you could ever hate Zim, and I will kill you."

Dibs heart hammered against his ribs, their close proximity making him light headed.

But then the moment was gone as Zim pulled back a little and looked at Dib whose eyes were hard, his expression blank.

"Let go of me Zim, I have more important things to do." He said in a moment of stubbornness and shrugged his shoulders, the pak legs tearing through skin, before finally releasing him.

Dib made sure he was out of sight before punching a brick wall so hard his knuckles split, blood trickling between his fingers.

Zim closed the door behind him and leaned against it. His insides were turning unpleasantly, and he was finding it difficult to breathe. It didn't matter. He would be ok. Who needed the human anyway? His gaze swept across the room, and lingered momentarily on the lifeless shape of Gir. The little robot had broken down years ago, and Zim, though he worked tirelessly for months on end, had to finally admit that he could not fix him. He'd sent off for parts that had never come, and was left with the lifeless carcass of steel and wires that was his only company on this hostile cattle infested planet. The gravity of how truly alone he was now that he had cut dib out, finally hit him. His antennae twitched uncontrollably in the closest an Irken could physically come to crying.

Ooooooooo/\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ooooooooooooooO

Finally, finally, finally! After almost 3 months in this godforsaken spittle runner, left with nothing but his thoughts, finally dib came into sight of the massive. He had gone over his plan a thousand times on the ride over; get in, get information, and get out. It was that simple. He doubted Zim would be on the massive, not if he was dead anyway. And if he was alive? Surely he must be in some prison somewhere? He would never just leave like this.

Even though he had been distant before he left, if he was doing well, he would have found some way to gloat? Right? But he hadn't heard a peep from him in over a year.

He had to find out where he was.

Dib grabbed the idm and turned it on. Immediately he was cloaked in light, the hologram completely disguising him as an Irken invader. Pale green skin, deep blue bug eyes, two long antennae atop his head; he was a changed man. Dib knew enough about the Irken race from observing Zim for so long, and he was confident that he would be able to pull this off.

He'd been able to pull up a map of the massive from the computers database, and now had a good idea of how to get to the Massive's archives. He'd spent all week practicing Irken mannerisms and using the holographic disguise, which took quite some concentration. With his heart pounding in his chest, and a mixed feeling of excitement and dread, dib prepared to put phase 1 of his plan into action.

Ooooooooo/\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ooooooooooooooO

Zim's last day on earth:

Maybe two months had passed since Zim and Dib had last spoken, and it was really starting to take its toll on dib. There hadn't been anymore late nights fighting horrendous henchmen, no more end of the world battles, not even the faintest glimpse of a plan for world domination. Nothing, not a word from Zim. Maybe he had imagined him all along, maybe- but no. he was covered in countless scars obtained from their battles, there was no way he could Imagine all of those. No, Zim was just lying low, maybe he had something bigger planned.

That morning, Dib was lying on his stomach, flipping through his emails when his phone buzzed. He almost ignored it, he barely ever got texts, and just assumed it was his network provider. Better check just in case.

From: actual alien

My base 5 minutes.

Almost before he knew what he was doing, he was on his feet. He frantically looked around his room for his coat, or something, anything, what should he bring? Weapons? No… His head was buzzing with a hundred questions. What was Zim up to? Was this some sort of trap? Did he have some sort of world dominance plan that required Dib to be distracted? Or had he reconsidered Dib's offer? Maybe he did want to be friends after all? The very idea made his head rush, and his heart beat a little faster at the thought. He grabbed a jacket off the chair and rushed out the door. He took the stairs two at a time, the anticipation was killing him. He didn't say a word to Gaz, who was sketching in her notebook on the floor, and slammed the door behind him.

The walk to Zim's base was more of a run, and yet it had never seemed longer. He had no idea why he felt so frantic, he just knew he had to find out how Zim was. He skidded on the grass outside Zim's base, and had no problem getting to the door as Zim had apparently disabled his defences. He tried the handle, but the door was locked.

"Zim!" he said breathlessly, banging on the door "it's me, let me in."

There was the sound of shuffling behind the door, and then it unlocked and swung open. Zim looked terrible. Dib was suddenly shot back to when they were kids, and dib had abandoned chasing Zim for "real science". It had been the longest that dib had left him alone for. Apart from now. He was thinner than usual, and paler too. His skin was a washed out whitish green colour, his antennae lay flat on his head, and he moved jerkily, but perhaps the most unnerving thing about Zim was his eyes. There was no light, no burning fire of passion in them.

"Zim" he breathed.

Zim grabbed him and pulled him inside, slamming the door behind them. They were thrown into a murky gloom. When dibs night vision had finally adjusted, and the floaters had gone from his eyes, he saw the room. It was a mess. Broken dishes lay strewn around the room, the couch was all but shredded and empty cartons and boxes of floor had been thrown into various corners.

"Zim has some news for you earth boy," he said, his voice fainter than usual.

Dib looked up from the room and waited curiously, and though he probably wouldn't admit it, he was concerned.

"My tallest have requested that I return to the armada."

Dib was stunned. Zim leave earth? There was a funny feeling in his chest. This was good news! Wasn't it?

"What for? They're not coming here are they? Will you come back?" he said that last part with the faintest traces of hope in his voice.

"probably to reward me for my valiant efforts against the pigs of this planet." Zims voice betrayed him. Dib could tell he didn't believe the words coming out of his own mouth.

"W- Are you coming back?"

"Not to worry, Zim will be returning very soon to ensure your pathetic planets destruction" again, his voice held no conviction.

Dib was stuck for words, he didn't really know what to say to him. He settled for:

"So, why did you call me out here?"

"For earth goodbyes."

He promptly grabbed Dib by his shirt and pulled him close. he gasped in surprise to find the alien nuzzled into his chest, his arms playing with the neck of his t-shirt.

"zim what the fuck" he mumbled half-heartedly, stroking his hand down the back of Zim's head, caught up un the moment.

He felt numb, his heart was beating too fast, and all he could think about was how warm Zim was, the feel of flesh on flesh as Zim slowly stepped up on his tiptoes, and breathed into dibs neck;

"Don't you dare forget me dib."

And with that he pulled down the collar of dibs t-shirt and sunk his teeth deeply into the flesh on dibs shoulder. He cried out in pain, but didn't try to shake him off. He held Zim as he sunk his teeth deeper and deeper, until blood began to pool around his teeth and he finally let go.

"Fuck Zim," he whimpered, "what was that for?"

"So you won't forget about Zim, you're mine earth boy. I left my mark on you."

Dib sucked in a shuddering gulp of air, trying to calm the feeling in his chest.

"You better not forget me either space boy." His voice was strained from the pain.

He grabbed Zim by the shoulder and pulled him closer and to their knees. Out of the corner of his eye, dib spotted an empty glass that Zim had left where is fell. He picked up the biggest shard and brought it close to the Irken.

"You dare mark the skin of Zim?" he demanded, but gently almost as if it was a dare.

When Dib carefully pulled down the neck of his uniform, he didn't protest. And in the same place Zim had bitten him, he marked his tiny enemy, drawing a crude circle with a plus inside. Zim would have killed him had he known that this was the symbol for earth, but instead he gritted his teeth and allowed dib to make the mark.

"Filthy disgusting human," Zim spat as his pinkish blood trickled slowly down his shoulder and soaked into his uniform.

"nasty horrible space jerk" dib retorted.

They sat there for a little while in silence, until Zim finally demanded that he leave.

"You're coming back right?"

"yes yes of course," he said wearily. He hesitated. "Goodbye dib."

The door closed behind him as he left, Zim's last words to him made him suspect that maybe he was lying to him.

Their farewell seemed like a dream, the scar on his shoulder was the only thing that confirmed the events of that morning. It really only became a reality for Dib when he heard the distant sound of the Voot Cruiser firing up its engines. He ran to his window just in time to see the small space craft fire up into the sky and through the atmosphere. He watched it until it disappeared into the burnt orange of the sunset.

Ooooooooo/\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ooooooooooooooO

Boarding the massive had been relatively simple. As dib had predicted, the spittle runner had no problem, gaining access due to its Irken make and design, it was finding the archives that proved to be most difficult.

The map of the massive he'd gotten from the computer, as it turned out, was a little outdated. Some basic structural changes had taken place within the Massive's walls, and proved a little more difficult to navigate than he had previously thought. It would have been easy to blend in and remain unnoticed, if it hadn't been for his height. Hundreds of Irkens milled around him, each hurrying on, busy in their own tasks. Every now and again they would turn and look at him, their necks craning over the crowd to see him better. They were worried he was here to inspect them, or perhaps to give them orders, whatever the cased, they gave him a very wide berth. Better safe than sorry. He was currently walking down the 8th hallway he'd gotten lost in, and had almost been able to recognise where he was from the maps, when a voice behind him stopped him in his tracks.

"Halt!"

Disclaimer: I don't own invader zim or any of its characters.

Hi again! So much for my dream of a regularly updated fanfic am I right?! Im not going to go into it, but ive been super busy for aages, and really only have some free time now. I wanted to make this chapter a bit longer so you would have something to make up for the huge gap in my writing, so here!

I found it really difficult to write this chapter (bit of the awl writers block), so be gentle!

Please, if you like this, let me know!

Review review!

Luv u all

Mia out~