Although it is only around four in the afternoon, the air outside is cold and seems to bite my skin. It's dark in Father's part of town but the darkness seems more colder, as if it has a mind of it's own and is glaring at me with invisible eyes. The cracked paved street is always hard but with each step I take it seems like it is harder than normal. There is nothing about right now either, which is strange. Often times you can see wandering spirits, hell hounds, or hell creatures walking about this part of the city but there is no one right now.

Fear.

I smell it. I feel it. It's everywhere. That is why it's darker, that is why no being is wandering, that is why everything feels different. Fear. Fear is driving everything away and making everything more intense.

I follow the scent of it. The lemon scent that stings my nose yet makes me hungry. The scent is very strong here. I keep walking forward out of Father's domain of the city, remembering I am only going out to buy Mocha food, but I can still smell the fear. It is the strongest I've ever smelled, yet it's different. Although it is mildly pleasing to my nose, there is an edge to it.

I walk in silence and soon I am among the seemingly 'mortal world' again. Cars go by and people honk their horns and others yell and fight. The edge of Father's domain is always the nastiest past of the mortal's town.

No one bothers me as I walk. Some watch me as if I am a threat, but that is only because they are scared. It is normal for one who is scared to feel threatened and become defensive. But no one bothers me.

I refuse to buy anything from the local stores around here. The few times I tried, some dumb ass with a death wish would try to steal from me and have their wish granted. I can't keep fucking up like that though... So I've learned to shop elsewhere.

Normally I would shadow-travel to the closest nice town and roam around a bit until I found the stores I needed to go to, but for some reason today all I want to do is walk.

Walk and never stop.

The sky is dark and the clouds are like a blanket. I hadn't realized just how tired my legs were until I stopped walking. I lean against the wall of the convenient store I've just entered and look for a clock some where in the small corner store. Behind the cashier is a clock saying it's nine at night. I close my eyes and lean my head back to rest, my legs shaking.

So stupid. You've never walked that far before, you're not a physically active person. You can't do something like that. You've been walking for at least four hours. So fucken stupid.

I feel the cashier watching me. She is a small thin woman with brown hair who looks to be about the age of 22. This woman is terrified.

Of course she is scared. A random male dressed in all black walked into her store and seemingly collapsed against the wall and is shaking. She's a mortal. And all mortals are scared of anything possibly stronger than themselves.

"Cat food."

"Uh-uhm.. I-I'm sorry. Wh-what did you ask for?"

Her fear intensifies. It is becoming stronger, adding to the scent of fear that never left my nose as I walked.

"Cat food. I need cat food."

"OH! Okay! Y-yeah."

Without asking she rushes from behind the counter and goes to one of the shelves. She goes back to the check out counter with a medium size of cat food.

"Is-is this good?"

She is frightened. She is hoping that I will take what I want and leave.

I slowly make my way to the counter, my legs shivering with every step, my thighs feel on fire. With each step I take in her direction, I can feel her trying to not step back. She herself is shaking now.

She should be scared. She has no idea what I am capable of. Not in her worst nightmares does she even have a clue what I could do to her. All I need to do is loose my temper or feel something too intensely. I'm uncontrolled.

I slowly reach my hand into my leather jacket pocket, she flinches. I bring my hand up and gently place seven dollars and a few quarters on the counter in front of her. The woman seems to release a large breath.

The wind slams itself against the front windows. The woman jumps as she checks out my bag of cat food. I don't flinch a bit.

"Y-you have th-three dollars ch-ch-change sir," she stumbles over her words.

I walk over to the glass-door fridges that hold multiple different drinks in them. My legs still shiver and ache but I ignore the pain. I take a large plastic bottle of water out and bring it back to the women. I place it on the counter.

Without asking she checks it out and places two quarters down next to my items.

"W-would you l-l-like a b-bag?"

I glance up at her. I am not angry, I am not frustrated, I am not threatening or frightening or harmful in my look. I try to have a very calm expression on my face. I am trying so hard to appear normal and relaxed.

Although my face feels calm, the women shivers and her eyes go wide.

Idiot. You can't ever make someone feel comfortable. You're very presence is enough to terrify anyone. Trying to appear welcoming only scares them more.

I look down again, my hair and hood covers my face.

"Yes."

She puts the cat food and water into a plastic bag and asks if I need anything else.

I need to be normal. I need to stop fucking up. I need to be like every regular stupid teenager. I need to not feel anymore. I need to have Bianca back. I need to be a better person. I need to not fail. I need to be smarter. I need to be softer. I need to be normal. I need to be ignorant. I need to have bliss. I need my Father to not be disappointed in me. I need everyone to stop staring at me. I need to be normal. I need to not have the ability to kill at will. I need to be normal. I need to feel normal. I need to be okay. I need to not be alone. I need to be understood. I need a friend...

"No, thank you," is all I mumble and walk back out into the cold night with my bag.

My legs are exhausted, I know I can't spend another five hours walking back; but I am too tired to shadow travel.

Walking slowly all alone on peaceful streets does something to your mind. It's similar to thinking at three in the morning but a bit different. You pass by places where people hang out yet no one is there at that moment. You feel the environment around you is hectic yet the buildings seem to be resting through it. Your mind wanders yet is focused at the same time. Thinking of everything yet nothing.

I feel empty yet completely full.

I pass by an electronics store and look in the glass windows. There is a boy seeming to get everything ready for closing. I enter the store.

Chink-Chink chink

A small bell is disturbed by my entrance. I stand in the door way, not closing the door yet.

"May I help you," the boy questions while putting something into a box behind the counter.

"I'm not sure," I mumble, more to myself.

The boy stands up straight and looks at me. He is short with a darker skin shade and curly brown hair. For some reason he seems familiar.

You can't possibly know him. And even if you did, he wouldn't want to know you.

I feel him get nervous, but I don't smell much fear from him.

"What did you say?"

I try again at seeming like a normal person. Looking up and giving my best calm expression I say, "I am not sure."

I see him shiver but he covers it up by doing a small bounce and walks around the counter, "Well, if you aren't sure what you want, I don't know how to help you."

I nod and watch him. He tries to act casual and in a good mood, but it seems he is just naturally energetic. He is young and can't be older than 14. Not that it makes much of a difference to me but it doesn't make sense how he could work in a store like this.

"I suppose..." I mumble, letting the door behind me close.

He looks at me for a moment, more curious than anything.

"Are you interested in a TV, cell phone? Maybe something you can listen to music to or a combination of things? We have a new shipment of X-box and PS3. Are you a gamer?"

I don't respond. A TV does not interest me, nor does a cell phone. I would have no use for either. I've never used any gaming device either and don't have anything to play it with.

He does a little skip and walks over to the wall of shelves and begins to poke around.

"Okay let's see. I'll pick something for you and you tell me if it seems like something you would like. We'll play a guessing game, how does that sound?"

I nod silently and watch him as he struggles to see the higher shelves. Eventually he gives up and sighs, walks behind the check out desk and brings a stepping stool back to where he was trying to reach.

"Being short is always a fun thing, am I right?"

Why is he trying to joke with me? Am I short? Or is he mocking me... I must be short... dammit I should fix this...

He bounces around and continues to looks at different small devices with an attitude of enjoyment. As if just looking and holding at the different devices is the greatest thing he has ever done.

"AHA! HERE IT IS!"

He jumps down and bounces over to me and pushes a small pocket-sized device with a large screen in my face.

"Okay. This may seem like an I-pod but it's not. It's one of those rip-off versions but I figured it would be better for you. It has 64 GB's for music, pictures, and a few programs that you can download. It does not text but I'm sure you can download a texting app if you want to. It is meant to play music for the most part but go ahead and download a few games. Here, I'll do it now for you to make it easier."

I watch as he turns the 'rip-off version' of the I-pod on and begins to download different games and programs although I hadn't even said I would buy it yet. He seems fully convinced that I will buy it and that it is a perfect fit.

It does sound cool... I could use it... I don't listen to a lot of music but I could...

"Alright. So I downloaded a texting app for you. It's kik so you can 'kik your friends'." He laughs at the joke but I don't. I won't ever use that app. For the moments that he is laughing at his own joke I look at his uniform. The plastic name tag on his chest jiggles as he laughs. I've always found the "Hello and welcome. My name is _._._._._._" name tags annoying. They are a mock welcoming. His name is Leo.

Soon Leo notices I am not laughing along and slowly his laughter dies out. He looks at me nervous for a moment then quickly resumes back to his energetic self.

"Okay. I've also downloaded YouTube, tetras, Mahjong, and a few other simple games for you. You can buy music with the I-Tunes program," He leans in a little closer to me and covers his mouth half way and squints his eyes, as if what he is about to say is very sneaky, "but I also gave you a program that you can download music for free. But that is illegal so don't let anyone see." He straightens up again and begins to show me how to navigate the device.

The touch screen seemed easy enough to understand. I found myself interested in the device, I wanted to take it and go. He explained to me how to download different apps and programs and how to use the free music down loader and a few other things.

"So, this is about fifty dollars."

I stare at him blankly.

Fifty Dollars?! I didn't come with that much money. I shouldn't have even walked into this store. It was stupid, stupid, stupid. Now I want this damn thing. It's completely unneeded and I'll be fine without it but It seems so cool. Why did I have to be curious and walk in here.

"Hey... If you don't have that much I'll give it to you for a little less, or you can just pay me back in school."

'Pay me back in school.' School? I know him from school, that's right! He is in my business class. He goes to my school. No, no, no, no. He knows who I am. He knows what I've done. He knows I'm a freak.

I look down at my shoes. I'm such an idiot.

"Hey, you alright? Nico?"

He knows my name. He knows me from school. There is no way this wont go around. I feel so embarrassed.

"H-here..."

I flinch when I feel his hand at the edge of my jacket pocket as he slips in the 'rip-off I-pod' into my pocket.

"Just take it. It's alright. Stay here and I'll get the charger for it."

Leo bounces behind the desk and takes two little plastic bags out from behind it. He then comes back over and holds them out to me.

"The charger stretches up to three feet so you can lay in your bed comfortably as it charges. And I'm giving you a pair of headphone too."

He stands there for a moment, awkwardly holding out the little plastic bags to me.

Why is he giving me these? I don't have money to pay for them and he knows that. He's trying to make things worse for me. He'll give me these things and then accuse me of stealing and everyone will talk more about me and have even more reasons. The fucken mortal police will get involved and I'd have created another mess that one of Father's workers will have to clean up. But he looks genuine... If he's... Pity. He's pitying me. How pathetic. Disgusting. He is pitying me. That is repulsive. I'm a disappointment. To be pitied, that is disgraceful. I'm such a-

My thoughts are interrupted by him gently placing the small plastic bags into my jacket pocket. I stand completely still. He seems to awkwardly lean from foot to foot for a few moments, I feel him becoming more nervous the longer we are silent. He is uncomfortable by me.

He should be.

"Soooo... Do you have a way of getting home? You can't be walking out in that."

I turn and look out the big glass windows behind me, up until now I had been oblivious to the weather.

I need to pay attention more...

A garbage can is carried down the street then falls and is sent back the way it came with a vengeance, as if the wind is fighting over which direction to blow. The sky can not be seen through the thick layer of dark clouds that loom over. A chill slithers in through any possible tiny opening of the windows and creates a cold throughout the small shop.

"Do you have a ride?"

I look at my shoes and shake my head, 'no'. Once again he seems to shuffle uncomfortably.

"Well, I've got a truck in the back and I can drive you home."

He can't be older than 15. He can't drive. It's illegal for him to have a driver's license. He's bluffing.

I glare at him, annoyed.

"Hey, hey, hey," Leo say, bringing his hands up defensively, " I know what you're thinking. But it's okay. Old Festus has yet to fail me, he can handle the weather. I'm a very good driver."

I slowly turn and look out the window again.

"It's not a problem if your house isn't near by. My dad doesn't particularly care when I get home, " Daddy issues? Same. ,"So how ever long it takes doesn't matter."

"No." I mumble and walk out into the violent wind and begin to walk down the street. It's colder than I thought it was.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. How could I even put myself in this situation. I need to be smarter than this. I should never have walked into the damn store. I should have walked back out the moment Leo saw me. I should have been smarter. I'm so stupid. I keep fucking up. He pitied me and gave me things out of repulsive pity. I'm a disgrace.

I had forgotten just how badly my legs were feeling. Each leg feels like cement as I slowly take each step, throbbing from the new strain.

I'm so stupid. I need to be better. I need to be smarter. I need to stop fucking up. I should not have walked this far. I should have shadow traveled to a store. I shouldn't have walked so much. I shouldn't have gone into that store. I can't tell anyone about this. Who would I even tell anyways? So stupid. I should...

"...hhheeeyyy..."

I need to stop fucking up. I need to try harder. I need to get control of myself and stop being so rash. I should be better. Why can't I just be better? Why can't I be normal? Why can't...

"...HHeeeeyyy..."

I need to get control of myself. I need to get control of my abilities. I need to try harder. I need to be stronger. I need to be better. I can't lose my self control and lash out just being I've gotten mad. I need to be calmer. I need to get myself under control. I need...

"HHHHEEEEEEYYYYYY!"

I whip around and see a large bronze pick-up truck driving towards me with Leo hanging half way out the window waving to me. The curls on his head being vigorously braided by the wind. He slows down and pulls up beside me. Leo leans over in his truck and opens the passenger side door to me.

"I'm not taking no for an answer. Get in."

Hey guys :D Thanks so much for reading my fanfiction. Special shout-out to a fan whose friend has created fan art for the story :D You're awesome. Just saying. I love fan art guys, if you have some, send me a link and I'll share it 3 . Leave me some reviews, :D tell me what you think and if you have any ideas for this ^_^ I love feedback.

Hope you all have a good rest of the day or if you are reading this at ungodly hours - heh heh heh...pun... - of the night then GO TO SLEEP!

^_^ Hope to have the next chapter up soon.

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