The NES Series:

Excitebike

The crowd cheered in resonating chorus, creating a rumble that matched the steady vibration of the bike between Villager's legs. He gripped the handlebars, enjoying the feeling of the thick rubbery grips beneath his fingers. He looked at his fellow racers on either side of them, each one clad in orange, blue, or purple jumpsuits, their faces obscured by large white helmets.

"Okay, you're good to go," Olimar said, standing up from where he had been running maintenance on Villager's bike. "Why exactly are you on that bike, and I'm still stuck doing pit crew?"

"Well, since Excitebike is being represented as a DLC track on Mario Kart 8, and I'm a DLC racer for that game, the managers of the track thought it would be a great publicity stunt to have me as a special guest for the race. As for you, well, we do still have our jobs as pit crew."

Olimar let out a long breath and rolled his squinty eyes. "Okay, but why do Rock and Jazz just get to sit and enjoy the race then? I could really use the help of a robot out here."

Villager glanced out at the stands where Rock and Jazz were sitting in the front row. Jazz was sipping a fruit smoothie, while Rock was holding up a large banner that read, "GO VILLAGER!"

"They are our guests, Olimar," Villager said. "We can't expect them to do our jobs for us."

"Okay, fine. Do I at least get to add a name to the Smash Five list from this game?"

Villager shrugged. "Sure. People have been requesting an Excitebiker for years."

"Really?" Olimar said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, of course. He's been right up there with Balloon Fighter and Ice Climbers as NES options since Melee."

"If you say so. It just seems to me like they wouldn't work all that great as a character."

"Why not?"

"Well, isn't the point of the character to be on a bike the entire time? What could anyone do on a bike?"

"Wario rides a bike."

"Yeah, but he's not on it the entire time. It's just one move. The bike is all an Excitebiker would have."

"Bowser Junior spent all of his time in a Klown Kar."

"No offense, but his Klown Kar was tricked out with a lot more capabilities than these bikes will ever have."

The Excitebiker to Villager's left leaned down and tapped Olimar on the shoulder. "Hey, are you guys talking about Super Smash Bros.?"

Olimar looked at the guy and nodded. "Yeah. We're supposed to be looking for candidates for Smash Five."

"Dude, put me down," he said. "I've been sending in an application for years. I'd love to be a Smasher."

Olimar shook his head. "I don't think so. I'd love to, but I'm just not convinced about what you bikers could possibly do on a battlefield."

"Oh," the biker said, sitting up straight on his bike. "You're one of those people, are you?"

A voice boomed across the arena. "Racers, start your engines."

Olimar bent down and picked up his tools. "Well, you guys have a fun race out there." He stepped out from the line of bikes and walked out to the long grassy strip alongside the track. The Excitebiker leaned in to Villager.

"So your friend thinks us bikers can't make it in Smash, huh?"

Villager nodded. "I don't agree. I think you guys would be awesome in it."

"Well then, what say we show your friend just what we can do, eh?"

Villager grinned. The announcer's voice counted down from three and the whistle blew to signal the start of the race. Villager clutched down on his handles, planted his feet into the pedals, and sped forward.