Squelch.
Leather boots running and ducking and weaving between pillars; eyes wide and chest heaving, but a grin was there.
She liked the thrill of the chase – even if it was her being chased. She would still likely tire out well before the Arishok did and Fenris knew that.
That stupid woman was going to get herself killed if she didn't do something now. How careless of her, or was it? She was not herself, and that was certain. Her mother's death was still fresh in her mind, more likely than not. This better not have been one last ditch attempt at her own life – even she would run out of luck if it was pushed hard enough.
But there it was; the magic.
He could feel it before he saw it; lyrium in his skin tingling as he watched frosty white dance from the end of her staff and before the Arishok could react, his feet were frozen in place.
The Qunari roared and there would not be much time until he broke free; Hawke would have to act quickly if she wanted to land any damage at all. But she did land damage and while it was not nearly as significant as any had hoped, it was something.
Lightning now danced in the air and Hawke laughed and Fenris wondered if she was finding some healing salvation in this fight – she looked more like the Hawke he knew instead of the Hawke she'd become.
(If he knew her less, he'd think she'd become an abomination, but now she had nothing left to be desired with her mother dead).
The Qunari's sword lashed out towards the nimble mage who spun away narrowly, her robes being ripped in the process.
Fenris felt concern then that perhaps she would die during this duel. That perhaps she was throwing herself away, slowly, but surely. Perhaps she was too far gone into her grief to fight harder for her life...
But the magic returned and the Qunari was slammed down onto the concrete with a loud crack. Hawke heaved enough energy to throw together another spell, only to have it fall apart as she was shoulder checked with enough force to send her body flying in the opposite direction.
Smack.
"A- ah..." Her voice shook, her back to that wall and she stared up at the Arishok with a sudden grim expression on her face.
"Well, you're pretty tough." She said, voice wheezy as she struggled to her feet and she wobbled and Fenris saw blood slide from her nose to her mouth and dribble from her chin as she grinned.
Only she would take this so lightly. The impending idea that she could die was an idea nearly impossible.
"Damn it all, Hawke, this is serious." Aveline had uttered beside him.
Serious indeed; unless Hawke had a plan. Which was feasible, but...Fenris had doubts. She'd been going about this so haphazardly in comparison to her typical 'style', as it were.
She was not used to fighting alone, but she had thrown herself out there to do it anyway. He had to wonder what her intentions were. Was she fighting for the city? Or was this an attempt to die?
"I'll have you know though..." Hawke breathe, raising herself further up just before she had to duck a swing – some dark hairs fluttered behind her to suggest how narrow of an escape that was.
"...I'm practically immortal. Hell, dying does not come easy, so you're going to have to try really hard if you're going to kill me."
If there was any sense of mercy in the Arishok (which there undoubtedly, wasn't), it was gone at those words. A raging roar filled the Keep and Hawke laughed as she was lifted by the collar of her robes and thrown across the other side of the room like a rag doll.
There was a loud crack as her body hit the wall, followed by a much weaker chuckle.
"...that's it?" Her voice was weak.
"...and here I thought, maybe, you had it in you. The thrill of the battle, the knowledge to give me the fight I want. Tch...useless." She forced herself up again, her right shoulder looking awkward and likely dislocated.
Anders made a comment about her well-being and Fenris didn't care. He just watched this fight, wondering what in the hell Hawke was thinking. What was she after? Was she trying to win or trying to die? He could not tell and perhaps, that was what she wanted. This entire time, she'd spent no spare instance to look at the crowd, to gloat at her expertise.
"...you come here and blame us for surviving. Blame us under your false truths. Blame us for one person's mistakes. Blame us for giving second chances." Hawke's eyes flared and the room crackled suddenly with an increase surge of emotional and magical energy.
Ah, there it was.
Her reason to fight.
"Isabela is one of mine. I protect mine. I give mine second chances. You will not have any more lives on your hands, Arishok. I will not and cannot allow it. No amount of hurt I suffer will change that. The actions of one do not determine the actions of many." She heaved a breath and her face flashed in pain before contorting into anger.
"I tried to understand, but I could not. Try and destroy me to get to what you want, but you will fail because my will to protect is stronger than your will to destroy."
And the fight continued.
No humourous remarks from Hawke and no words still from the Arishok. There was a sudden reinvigorated will to fight on Hawke's end; perhaps a sudden need to see this through.
"I protect mine. I give mine second chances." Even the mages, who continued to disappoint her one after another; the mages who took her mother from her – the mages who continued to betray her left and right.
Fenris did not have her ability to forgive; her ability to grant second chances. One hurt was enough – if she saw it that way, perhaps she would hurt less. Perhaps what had happened to her mother would never have happened.
What ifs, however, did nothing now. It was over and she was fighting for a world that would use her and abuse her. Fighting for a world that probably should be destroyed for hurting her as it had and would probably continue to do.
"I am here." He had told her that night, after everything he had done to her, but he could not resist her in her time of need.
"I don't know what to say, but I am here." With her mother gone, who would stop her from doing such foolish things?
Aveline only inspired the rebel in Hawke.
"Am I to blame...?" Her voice was broken, but there were no tears.
"...for not saving her?" It was a question with no one there who could answer it.
He could not give her the answer she felt she needed and they both knew it. Even so, to sit in silence would do nothing for her; that he was most certain of.
"You are looking for forgiveness, but I am not the one who can give it to you." It was poor, he decided afterwards.
He had come to her to help, and instead had likely only hurt her more. She had said nothing after that, and still there were no tears.
She was a strong woman.
And now, she still only continued to push this thought. She was strong, facing against a Qunari Arishok who had thrown her time and time again, who was trying to break her physically and emotionally and she was not having any of it.
The magic in the air was strong and the fight was going on and on and on, neither side tiring enough for surrender.
It would indeed, be a fight to the death and Fenris was concerned only for her. Hawke. Yet, he was also proud and pleased.
She was someone he respected – there were few who rightfully earned his respect and none of them were mages. Yet, there she was. A mage determined to prove him wrong through her actions, not her words. He may not agree with her actions, but her actions were hers and they knew it.
"I'm not going to argue with someone set in his ways." She said once.
"I think everyone deserves a second chance."
"You're giving them third, fourth, and fifth chances, Hawke. How many more must you give until you're satisfied?"
"As many as it takes for them to change – or for me to kill them all." He rarely saw her so serious, but something in him tingled when he did.
She was so certain of herself. Even after everything.
"I will –destroy- you!" Her voice brought him to his senses now, and he stepped back as the lyrium burned at her power.
Then it was over, the fight was won. Hawke stumbled, bloody, beaten, but not broken like her bones. It was a miracle that she remained standing at all, Anders would probably say later.
If not for her will, and what he knew of her, Fenris would have agreed.
"It's over. I've won. I've bested your Arishok in battle now leave. Honour your agreement." And without a word, the remaining Qunari that plagued the city left.
And Hawke fell, laughing and gripping on her cracked staff to keep her on her knees and not on her stomach.
"Ow, ow, ow." Fenris was the first to her side, now that the circle had been broken.
"Oh, don't give me that look, Aveline." Hawke laughed, peering up at the Guard Captain with the widest of grins.
"All in one piece."
"Barely. Anders...?"
"Ah, none of that, thanks." Hawke replied flippantly, getting back to her feet and shaking the group off as best as she could.
"How else will I have an excuse to remove myself from the ceremony?"
Steely expression from Aveline; Hawke surrendered.
"...fine." She uttered finally.
"...and here I was hoping for some alone time after the battle. A woman really can't get any privacy in Kirkwall. How demeaning."
"Enough is enough. You've done being careless enough for one day."
"You ruin all of my fun, Aveline."
"Someone has to." Now that your mother is gone – was unspoken in the air.
Hawke frowned only for the briefest of moments before she sighed.
"...right...then...someone catch me? Since I've reached my careless quota for the day."
And she fell.