Chapter Five: Mystery Meat X

Narukami returned home, rather exhausted from his group's battle with the last enemy from Mitsuo's dungeon. Both his uncle and little cousin were waiting for him as he entered the house.

"Big Bro's home!" Nanako exclaimed, cheerful as ever. Dojima looked over at the doorway from his seat in the living room. "Hey there," he nodded slightly. "Have fun with your friends today?"

Yu cleared his throat as he answered. "Yeah. It was… exciting."

"Glad you had a good time," his uncle replied kindly. "We saved some food for you while you were out."

"Dad bought food from Junes!" Nanako informed her Big Bro happily. "It's in the fridge!"

"Oh. That reminds me," said Dojima, scratching his jaw. "I noticed a box was tipped over in the fridge last night. I assumed it was yours, so I put it back."

Narukami squinted a bit before recognition struck him. "Ah. Yes, it's for a… project." He'd almost forgotten about the mystery gift that he received just the other day. Which reminded him; he should probably remove the insect he'd caught. It would do no good to frighten one of his family members if they just happened to open the box and find a dead bug lying inside. So after grabbing his meal from the fridge, he located the box in the back corner. What he saw after opening it was not what he expected.

Yu assumed that he'd find a dead bug crumpled up inside the box, most likely situated around or under his gifted 'treat'. What he found instead was no insect at all, and a meatball that was nearly double the size that he'd remembered it being. He reached inside to lightly touch the chunky sphere, and was surprised to feel that it was in fact warm as well. He decided to poke it…

After hearing a loud bashing noise Dojima peered over at the kitchen, where his nephew was still situated in front of the open fridge. "Everything alright?" he asked. "Sounded like you hit your head or something."

There was no answer as Yu continued to stare at the gifted box, rubbing his stinging temple. In spite of recent events that he and his friends had experienced, he knew that he wasn't insane. The Object had moved; he was sure of it.

The remaining occupants of the house looked on bewilderedly as the silver-haired boy dashed upstairs without uttering a single word, clutching something tightly to his chest.

"Big Bro…?" Nanako wondered aloud as she gave her father a puzzled look. "He left his food…"

The grizzled detective sighed. "Guess he'll warm it up later. I've decided I'm through with questioning every odd thing he does…"

The next day found Narukami at Aiya after school. It had rained all day long and was just now starting to let up. His order was the same as on any other rainy day, a Mega Beef Bowl accompanied by a large glass of water. The one thing different than usual was the small white box situated near his bowl on the counter…

The door opened to let another customer inside. He spotted Narukami immediately and made his way over while finishing his topsicle. "Senseeii!" Teddie exclaimed, hopping onto the stool next to his self-proclaimed mentor. "Whatcha doing here, Sensei? Having dinner?"

Yu nodded and studied the bear. "You've been wandering around town with that suit on all day?" Teddie smiled and tossed the used topsicle over his shoulder. "My shift ended at Junes, so I've got nothing to do. And all of you guys were still in school, so…" He looked at the large bowl sitting in front of his sensei. "Oooh, that's a lot of food! Looks beary tastey. Can I have some?"

Yu watched the bubbly bear. Truly, he was a bottomless pit when it came to food. Then again, they'd all seen his x-rays, and there was indication of neither bones nor organs. Perhaps he was a black hole on the inside. If anyone could finish the Beef Bowl in one sitting, it would be Teddie. And yet…

"I should warn you," the stoic boy said. "No one's finished the entire thing before."

Teddie's countenance brightened with awe. "Oh, so it's a challenge? Ha! I can do it, Sensei!"

Narukami stared at the unfinished bowl, not seeming to have heard Teddie at all. "I've determined that this bowl is but one of many portals to the Meat Dimension," he said with an impassive expression.

"Hm? The Meat Dimension? What's that, Sensei!?"

Yu pressed on without answering: "It takes Understanding to accept the meat as a whole and Knowledge to set the proper pace. It takes Courage to attack the mountain of meat head-on, and Diligence to-"

Sluuurrrp~

Narukami stiffened as he watched Teddie down the entire meal in one gulp.

"Whewww, that was amazing, Sensei!" he said, looking serious. "Super tastey! I told you that you can count on me!" He seemed extremely proud of himself.

"H… how." Yu was actually at a loss for words.

Teddie perked up even more when he noticed the small box sitting on the bar as well. "Whoahh, more food? What's in it, Sensei? Is it a cake?"

Yu had no time to react as Teddie grabbed the box to empty the contents into his stomach without even looking inside.

"T-Ted…!"

The bear swallowed and soon after an audible thump was heard, as if a hefty rock had landed at the bottom of a deep well. A palpable silence hung in the air. The furry bear was unmoving in his seat, seemingly petrified. Had the Mystery Meat paralyzed him?

"S-S…Sensei…" Teddie moaned.

"Y-yeah…"

"That cake… It's terrible!" He shook his head back and forth, hands clasped above his head. "M-my virgin taste buds! They've been horribly wronged!"

Yu blinked. Well at least… At least he didn't have to pay for the food now that Teddie had eaten it all…

Soon after, Teddie left his suit behind to tag along with his sensei back to Yasogami High. When asked why, Narukami only replied that he was "strengthening bonds" with the other Investigation Team members. Teddie then asked how he knew that any of the others would still be there an hour after school.

"Because of the date," Yu replied plainly.

"The date?" Teddie wondered aloud. "Oh! You know exactly who will be there based on what day it is? Wow, Sensei! Can you see the future?"

Yu nodded slightly with a smile. "Something like that."

They entered the practice building and soon found who they were looking for in the arts and crafts room. Teddie spoke up once he recognized who was inside.

"Hey, it's Kanji! Hiii, Kanj-"

The excitable blonde was forced to stop waving as Narukami pulled him from the doorway with a hand over his mouth. Ignoring the boy's muffled protests, Yu tilted his head towards the room.

"He looks busy."

Teddie looked to where he had gestured. Sure enough, it looked like Kanji had his hands full at the moment. He seemed to be yelling at two other students.

"Nah, you got it all wrong, for god's sakes. You gotta go back over the original seam first. If you don't it's just gonna come undone, see?"

"Ah, y-yes," one of the students replied, flustered. Beside her, her friend discreetly tried to copy her movements. Kanji noticed and scolded her as well.

"Tch, don't go all fast and shit when you got no idea what you're doin'. Take it slow until you get the hang of it. You don't just rush through sewing on your first try."

"Oh, s-sorry! Sorry."

Kanji sighed and crossed his arms. "You gotta take the time to actually learn first, unless you want your creation to look like a hideous pile of crap. Are you tryin' to be shit at this on purpose, or what?"

The two boys watched awkwardly from the doorway as the girls struggled to hold back their tears of failure. "K-Kanji-kun can be beary strict…" said Teddie, feeling sorry for the girls. Yu nodded in agreement.

The tall boy observed the students' work with a stern expression, apparently oblivious to how nervous the two of them had become because of his presence. After a short while his expression softened, and a faint smile crept onto his face.

"Huh. You're not half bad, both of you. Looks like you may have what it takes. You learn fast, so maybe you'll be experts at sewing in no time.

"Oh!"

"Really?!"

Kanji nodded his affirmation with a thumbs-up. "Hell yeah. Just don't give up and you've got it made."

The girls exclaimed their joy and relief loudly, jumping up to give Kanji a grateful hug.

"H-hey! What're you…?" Both their eyes flowed with tears of joy as they ignored his uncomfortable protests.

"Stop, dammit!"

Narukami smiled as he made his way from the room. It seemed Kanji had branched out to meet even more people. He felt he understood the coarse boy better after seeing this softer side of him…

Teddie bounced on his feet, following Yu to another floor. "So, Kanji's a sensei too now, huh? Beary cute!"

"Yes, it is," the stoic boy agreed. After ascending the stairs, Yu stopped abruptly in front of one of the Home Ec rooms. An aroma that he couldn't pin down was wafting from it, so he decided to crack the door open to see what was going on inside. Teddie pushed himself in front, sniffing the air before looking inside.

"Oh! It's Nao-chan and Rise-chan!" he whispered much too loudly. "Heyyy, Sensei do you think those two could be 'scoring' again-"

Narukami reached around and pinched the rowdy bear's nose to silence him. They seemed to have caught the two in the middle of a conversation.

"Plus, Yukiko-senpai said that she and Chie-senpai were picking up stuff to practice today too, so there's no way I'm falling behind."

"Well in any case, I see that you've finally finished," said Naoto in a rather annoyed tone. "But why did you require me to observe the entire time? I did have some other work to attend to."

"Becauuse," Rise huffed and crossed her arms. "I needed emotional support! None of the others have a palette mature enough for my masterpieces. I mean, It's not like I doubted my skills or anything, but…"

"I see…" the detective replied. "What… type of soup was this supposed to be again?" She wrinkled her nose at the steamy red concoction as she placed a hand on her hip. Rise brought a hand to her chin as she pondered.

"Well… it's an original recipe. There's vegetables, tomato… I threw in some meat as well. Oh, and some special sauce. Created by moi, of course," the idol grinned proudly, clasping her hands behind her back.

"Is that so…"

Rise didn't seem satisfied with such a reply. "Geeze, Naoto! You could at least pretend to sound interested! I worked hard on it, you know." She offered her best pout.

"Ah… right. Sorry. It looks uh… you did well, Rise-san." Naoto fidgeted with the hat atop her head.

The girl snorted at the formality before smiling with a nod. "Thank you."

A minute or so passed, both of them staring apprehensively at the large pot of food…

"Naoto." Rise glanced at the Detective Prince expectantly before eyeing the soup again.

"Hm?"

"So taste it already."

Silence…

…

"…W-why can't you taste it?"

"Naotoo~! Please?"

"It is your food after all, is it not?"

"That's beside the point!" the starlet protested. "Plus, I need an unbiased opinion. I mean it's my food, so I know it tastes good, but…"

"Then we can leave it at that, shall we?" Yosuke-senpai had warned Naoto about this a while back. She recalled his tormented expression when he made her swear to never eat any of the other girls' cooking. Ever. Also a bit about him not wanting the memories of her youth to be tainted in the same way that his had, or something like that. She was pulled from her ominous thoughts when Rise grabbed ahold of her arm.

"C'mon Naoto, pleeease? At least just one sip! It would really mean a lot to me." She leaned on the detective's shoulder, using her impeccable acting skills to look almost heartbroken.

Outside the door, Teddie was truly moved by such an emotional display. He placed a hand over his chest and attempted to walk inside, fully prepared to take the fall for Naoto. Narukami held him back however, shaking his head solemnly. "Some sacrifices…" he said enigmatically, "are never meant to be made."

Back inside the classroom, Naoto sighed heavily with Rise still tugging on her arm. She wouldn't want to be the cause of Rise crying, whether they were crocodile tears or not. So she swallowed the ominous feeling she'd felt for some time now and answered with a resigned smile. "Very well, if it truly means this much to you."

The idol squealed in delight as she looked for a spoon. "Thank you, Naoto. You'll love it, I promise!"

Yu and Teddie watched outside in horrified anticipation as Rise scooped a good amount of soup onto the spoon and slowly brought it to the shorter girl's mouth. Naoto seemed to accept the food pretty well, appearing to approve of the flavor before swallowing.

"It's… quite good." She chuckled warmly. "I'm impressed, Rise."

"See? Told you it would be good!" Rise beamed, feeling somewhat relieved.

Naoto cleared her throat. "Yes, well… I'll be sure to take Hanamura-senpai's future warnings with a grain of salt. Apparently he was…" She rubbed her eyes. "He was ah, overreacting."

The idol rolled her eyes at the mention of Yosuke's ridiculous exaggerations. "For sure… wait Naoto, are you alright? You look a little flushed…"

Naoto attempted to loosen her collar as she spoke. "R-Rise… that sauce you mentioned. What was," she coughed loudly. "What did you put…?"

"My secret sauce?" she asked, surprised. "Well, of course I couldn't just make the food plain without any additional flavor. I added some things for a little extra kick." She counted on her fingertips. "Lots of peppers, of course. Green, yellow, red stick, jalapeño… oh! Banana peppers, too. I also found a few foreign spices I wasn't too familiar with name-wise, but they just add even more flavor, I'm sure."

"You… t-too much. H-hot…" The Detective Prince wheezed.

"Hm? Naoto?" She turned after hearing a strange sound. "Ah!" Rise kneeled over Naoto's unconscious form, her face as red as a tomato.

"N… n-nurse!"

Yu grabbed ahold of Teddie's shoulder. "Run."

"S-Sensei?" The boy's eyes widened in confusion.

"We should leave them be," was all he got for a reply as they stormed back down the steps. Narukami understood his friend's pain, and felt closer to both of them as a result. But when it came down to the cooking skills of certain members of the Investigation Team…

It seemed that some lessons were meant to be learned the hard way.

After following Narukami around some more, Teddie found himself back at Junes.

"What're we doing back here, Sensei? Are we getting a gift for Nanako-chan?"

Yu shook his head and reminded the bear about what his kohai had said. "According to Rise, Chie and Yukiko should both be here in the produce section."

"Oh-ho!" Teddie replied, understanding. "So we're still 'strengthening bonds' then." Yu nodded in affirmation. Before long, they located the pair in front of one of the many produce isles.

"Wonnnderful!" the bear shouted. "Chie-chan and Yuki-chan shopping for food! I still haven't gotten the chance to eat one of their proper meals…" he said, blushing with excitement.

Narukami put a hand on Teddie's head to get him to duck behind the isle they were currently watching from. "Some things…" he stated seriously, "were never meant to be tried by mortal men."

Teddie's big blue eyes blinked questioningly at his sensei. Someone walked up to them right before he could inquire of his master's tremendous wisdom. "Ted? Bro? What're you guys doing here?" They turned to see Yosuke in his Junes apron, carrying a large crate in his arms.

"Shhh!" Teddie hushed loudly with a finger to his lips. "You'll blow our cover, Yosuke! Don't ruin it!"

"Ruin what?" He shifted the box's weight to get a better view at what they were looking at. "Oh. So those two are at it again, huh? Geeze, I feel sorry for whatever poor bastard has to taste-test their crap-" The brunette was suddenly pulled behind the isle by the other two boys, causing the box he'd been holding to fall to the ground with a loud crash.

"H-hey—the hell did you do that for?! If anything's broken in that, it comes outta my salary, y'know!"

"Shhh!" the other two shushed him.

Yosuke grunted. "What're you even snooping on them for, anyways?"

"We're strengthening our bonds with the other teammates!" Teddie supplied matter-of-factly.

Yu nodded. "That's right."

The Prince of Junes blinked. "Strengthen… what? By spying on them? Dude, that's just creepy as all hell—"

"We wouldn't expect you to understand, Yosuke," said Teddie with his eyes closed in a dismissive manner. "It takes a true master of Personae to forge Links with others through social activity. Right, Sensei?"

Narukami dipped his head. "Exactly." The smaller boy seemed to glow with his sensei's approval.

"Gimmie a break…" Yosuke retorted - then immediately joined them on their watch. "Hold on. What're they even buying from this section?" He eyed their basket. Shrimp, vegetables, white rice… god please no. Were they making curry again?! Mustard, horseradish… cocoa, soy sauce… raisins? Yogurt? The hell?

"What the hell are they even trying to make with that stuff?" Yosuke crouched lower behind the isle when he thought one of them glanced their way. "This is only gonna end in disaster, dammit…" Come to think of it, why was he even spying with the others in the first place? And why was he feeling so invested all of a sudden? He still had work to do, for god's sakes. His thoughts were interrupted by the girls' voices.

"So, that's it for this list," Chie was saying as she placed one last thing into their basket. "Anything else we need to get before we go?"

"Hmm…" Yukiko pondered aloud. "We should probably get some more types of meat. Or maybe some tofu, at the very least."

"Oooh, meat sounds good. While we're at it, we might as well grab some beef steak from the food court on our way out."

Yukiko seemed vexed. "But Chie, we just ate on the way over here…"

"I know," the shorter girl defended. "All this shopping's made me hungry, is all."

Yukiko shook her head as they made their way to the refrigerated isles, both oblivious to the small group that was tailing them. Once they came to a stop, the boys situated themselves in the next isle over, discreetly listening from their new hiding spot.

"Do you think that the others would even try our food again after what's happened, well… before?" asked Yukiko as she placed something in the basket.

"Nope," Yosuke whispered bitterly from their eavesdropping point.

Chie scratched at her head nervously. "Well… sure, maybe. I mean if we tell them we've been practicing, I'm sure they'd believe us."

"Deceit," said Yu, possibly feeling betrayed; it was difficult to tell.

"Hm," Yukiko agreed with a nod. "We could surprise everyone! Like make everyone lunch the next time we meet up."

"Yeah! That'd be great."

"Ha! There is no chance in hell— oww!" Yosuke cried after being elbowed in the shoulder, causing the box in his arms to fly right out of the isle.

"Teddie, I swear to god—"

"Shhhh! You were being too loud, Yosuke!"

"Like knocking that crate out of my hand was any quieter! They've gotta be onto us now."

Narukami placed a hand over both of their mouths to silence them. "Shush. You'll both blow our cover. They're still talking." The two boys ceased their bickering for the moment to listen.

"If that fails, there's still always Teddie," Yukiko was saying. The bear in question perked up at the mention of his name.

"Pshh, yeah he'll eat anything. Guess we can always count on him," Chie said jokingly.

Teddie appeared to be touched by their apparent consideration, obviously inexperienced with any form of sarcasm. He began to hum to himself in delight. The girls seemed to be finished with their search as well, since their footsteps could be heard moving away.

"But you've been taking lessons from the Inn's chef, right? I'm sure in no time— uhh…" Chie paused. "Do you hear that?"

Yukiko looked up from their shopping list. "Hear what?"

Chie shrugged. "It's like, I don't know… singing? I'm not sure."

The Heiress strained her ears to listen. "Oh…" Come to think of it, it did sound like something was making a… cooing noise. "It sounds close by," she noted.

"Dammit Teddie, shut up!" Meanwhile a few feet away, Hanamura was trying his best (without using strangulation) to silence the bubbly nuisance before he could lead the girls straight to them with his incessant humming.

"Mmmhhnnf!" Teddie protested as Yosuke put an arm hold around his neck and mouth. Yu's eyes widened when he realized that the girls were now heading their way. "Ok, I definitely heard that," said Chie, starting to round the corner. Could be a kid that lost his mom or something. She wasn't able to get far before she tripped on something in her way.

"Ack! W-hat the-?" The boys heard her exclaim. "Where did this come from?"

"Crap! The crate," Yosuke panicked and let Teddie go; about to rush to his box before its contents could be harmed any further. Yu grabbed him by the arm to stop him. "Are you insane?" he warned.

"Dude, if anything else is smashed in that crate, I'll be broke for two weeks!"

Narukami shook his head. He felt that he understood the girls' drive to be better cooks, but staying here any longer would only cause everything to backfire in their faces. "It's either it… or you."

Teddie nodded fervently as he started to scamper in the opposite direction. "Sensei's right!"

Yu nodded. "We should leave it be."

"What? Are you serious?" Yosuke sighed dejectedly. "Dammit… let's just go then." He knew he should have just minded his own business…