It had been hard, choosing Marian over Regina. His heart told him to choose his soulmate, Regina, but he couldn't. He was a man of honor, he made a promise to Marian the day they got married. Till death do us part, and it did, then it didn't.
But none of this changed the fact that he still loved Regina, he will always love her.
He was constantly thinking of her, how she was doing. Probably hurting, because of him. He hadn't spoken nor seen her in a week. He longed to touch her, to hold her and kiss her. To lie with her and tell her that everything would be okay.
But it's not, it's not okay. Whenever Marian tried to touch him he'd think of Regina, and pull away. He'd always tell her he just wasn't ready yet. He probably never will be, he thought.
It wasn't easy for Marian either, he knew that. He didn't want to hurt her, because none of this was her fault. He made a choice, and now he has to live with it. Give them a try, for Roland's sake. He has his mother back, and he was happy. Robin didn't want to ruin this for him. He decided to give it a try.
So here he was, at Granny's, waiting for their order at the counter. Roland stayed at the camp, refused to come with them, because he was in the middle of a game with Will.
"I'll be right back," Marian said as she got up and walked towards the ladies restroom.
His thoughts went back to Regina. He took out his phone, his thumb hovering over the call button. He probably shouldn't, but he had to know how she was doing. It had been two weeks and he hadn't heard anything from her. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear Marian come back.
He turned sideways to pull out her chair so she could sit. That's when he saw her, sitting all the way in the back. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. But there was something different about her. Her eyes, the light he always used to see in them wasn't there. They were a little darker and sad, but that beautiful smile of hers covered that up.
She wasn't alone, she was there with Graham. The same Graham he knew she'd had a thing with before they met. He couldn't help but feel a little jealous. And a little was an understatement. He couldn't bare the thought of Graham touching her and kissing her.
He was aware that he was staring, but it was like he didn't have any control over his body. He wanted to turn around and look straight ahead until Ruby brought their food, but he couldn't look away, even after Regina caught him staring.
The second their eyes locked he felt a flutter of electricity run through his body. His palms were getting sweaty, his heart was beating so fast he thought it would jump out of his chest.
He felt a hand on his thigh, which brought him back to reality.
"Robin? Are you okay? Ruby brought our food." Marian leaned in to whisper in his ear, "let's go home to Roland."
He gave her a smile and they both got up to leave. He held the door open for her and quickly looked back to see if Regina was still looking. She was. He gave her a reassuring smile, hoping he'd see her soon again and left.
They walked back to the camp to find Roland and Will playing another round of hide and seek. Poor Will was exhausted after the fifth round but Roland didn't want to play anything else.
It had been a few hours since he saw Regina, but he was still thinking of her. Seeing her at Granny's but not being able to talk to her, to see how she was doing was torture. He went to sleep that night with Marian lying next to him but with Regina on his mind.
• • •
The next day wasn't any better. He spent the morning getting Roland ready for school before heading to the sheriff's office. He tried to keep himself busy with work, lots and lots of paperwork. Because he knew that if he stopped his mind would go back to Regina.
After hours of work Emma gave him a ride home. And of course Emma, who was noisy and always trying to help people couldn't help but ask:
"So, have you heard from Regina?"
"No. Not since I went to her office the night after Marian returned." He said, not bothering to look at her. He kept staring out of the window.
"That was three weeks ago! Do you know where she is?" Emma asked
"Yes, I was aware. Thank you, and no I don't know where she is." Robin replied, getting a bit annoyed by the blonde.
"Jeez Robin, I am just trying to make some conversation... Anyways" she continued, ignoring Robin's annoyance. "Apparently she was hiding out in her vault."
Of course! Why didn't he think to check the vault. He went to her house time after time, knocked and had begged her to let him in. But she wasn't home, she was in her vault.
"I heard she went back to work yesterday, so I guess she's tired of hiding out. Maybe you should try talking to her again, she's probably home again." Emma added.
"Yeah okay, thanks for the ride Emma." He said, opening the door and stepping out of the car. He had spent the whole day thinking of Regina, he didn't need advice or a motivational speech from Emma. The girl was head over heels in love with the pirate but won't admit it to herself or anyone else for that matter.
He could smell the dinner Marian was making from where he stood. He hadn't properly eaten all day, his lunch was some day old donuts and coffee Emma brought him. But he wasn't hungry.
"Papa!" His little boy yelled and ran to his father, brining Robin back to reality. He picked Roland up an threw him in the air before giving him a kiss on his forehead.
"My boy!" Robin said. Roland wrapped his tiny arms around his dad's neck to give him a hug.
"How was pre-school? What did you do today?" Robin asked, wanting to hear all about his son's day. The four year old just started going to school last week. He would come home everyday excited to tell his mom and dad about all the games he had played and all the new friends he'd made.
"Fun! We played tag and i learned my ABC's."
"You did?!" Robin said and started walking to his tent while listening to Roland going on and on about all the things he saw today.
"And I saw Gina in the car, but she didn't see me." Roland said with a pout.
"Papa why won't we sleep at Gina's house anymore? I want to play video games with Henry and make cookies with Gina again." Roland asked looking his father in the eyes, waiting for an answer.
But Robin had no idea how to answer all those questions. Roland did not understand that after his mom returned he had to leave Regina to be with Marian, which meant no more video games, no more waking up to Regina's delicious chocolate pancakes, no more baking cookies together or having movie nights, as a family.
Roland would always be the one to fall asleep first, and not short after, Henry would follow. Regina would take Roland to bed and Robin would take Henry, because he was getting too heavy for Regina. Roland would wake up sometimes after Regina had put him down on his bed (because he had his own room at Regina's) and would ask her to lie with him a little, and she would, happily. Then after both boys were finally in a heavy slumber, Robin and Regina took the opportunity to have some alone time. Which was something Robin should hardly be thinking about at the moment.
"I don't know my boy." He started, not wanting to upset Roland. "I will ask her if you can go play with Henry after school."
"Yes!" The little boy cheered and let go of his father's neck, wanting to be put down.
"What is he so happy about?" Marian asked looking after her son running towards Will.
"He wants to go on a play date with Henry." Robin answered, taking off his jacket and sitting down across Marian.
"Oh. At Emma's or Regina's?" She asked, continuing cutting vegetables, but Robin noticed her posture stiffen slightly.
"Regina's. Emma doesn't have a playstation, and Roland has some toys at Regina's."
"Have you asked her?" Marian asked.
"No not yet." He said, starting to get a little uncomfortable talking about Regina with Marian.
Neither one knowing what to say next. The silence was long and awkward. Robin was the first to speak.
"Do you need help with those?" He asked pointing at the vegetables.
"I do, thank you." Marian said giving him a smile.
He stood up and sat down next to her. She handed him a knife and he started cutting some tomatoes.
Living in the woods had its perks, but in times like these he wished they had a house, with a kitchen and a countertop where they could be cutting these. Like at Regina's, cooking was so much easier there. He wasn't the best cook but he would surprise her sometimes with dinner when she would get home late from town meetings. He would ask Snow if she could watch the kids so they could have some privacy. 'Dinner and a movie' he would tell her when she asked what they were going to do, but they'd never make it past the first 30 minutes of the movie. Regina would ask him to take her to their bedroom and they-
"Robin!" Marian hit him on his arms.
"Where are you with your thoughts! Less thinking more cutting!" She laughed.
"Sorry I.."
He just couldn't get Regina out of his head. Every little thing reminded him of her. He had to clear his mind and the only place he could walk without being disturbed was by the lake. He got up and grabbed his jacket.
"I'll be right back," He said, giving Marian a kiss on her forehead.
"Where are you going? What about dinner?" She asked getting up on her feet.
"I'm going for a walk. Don't worry about it, I'm not hungry. I'll be back before dark."
It felt like he'd been walking for hours, but he wasn't feeling any better. His mind was still on Regina. Before he had any say in the matter he was in front of her house.
He shouldn't be here, he knew that. But he really needed to see how she was doing or if she needed anything. It was the least he could do.
He was getting nervous, what if she didn't want to see him. Maybe this was a bad idea. He turned around to walk back to the camp.
Man up Robin, you didn't walk all this way to chicken out and walk away.
He turned back around, walked to her front door, and knocked.
No one answered. Maybe she wasn't home. He tried knocking again. After a few seconds of waiting the door swung open. She was still trying to close her robe. Her eyes grew big when she saw him.
"Rob.. Robin, what are you doing here?!"
"I just wanted to see how you were doing. I didn't get a chance to talk to you yesterday, back at Granny's." He said giving her a half smile.
"Who's at the door babe?" He heard coming from upstairs.
"Uhh it's Emma, I'll be right up," She stepped outside the house and closed the door.
"Is that Graham?" He asked, feeling slightly angry when he knew he shouldn't be.
"What if it is?" She said, crossing her arms over her chest.
He let out a scoff.
"Robin what do you want from me? Why are you here?"
"I told you, I wanted to see how you were doing, clearly you're doing fine. Glad to know I'm that easy to forget."
"Are you kidding me? You don't get to play the victim here, you left me!" She was almost yelling now.
She was right, he did leave her, but all he could think about was Graham, doing things to her, things that he wanted to do.
"So is this what you're going to do now, sleep around?!"
As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted it.
He didn't come here to fight. He was mad, furious even, but this wasn't the reason he came here. So he turned around, ready to walk away. But she grabbed his arm before he could take a step.
"You don't get to call me a whore. When I met you, I thought I had found the person that I was going to spend the rest of my life with. But you chose Marian. You left me. I make no apologies for how I choose to repair what you broke." Tears were streaming down her face.
"Regina.. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." He took a step closer, reached out his hand to touch her arm, trying to calm her down. But she took a step back.
"Don't, don't touch me. Could you just leave. Please."
She wiped away her tears before she opened the door and went back inside.