Life Unexpected – Chapter 3
Rachel woke up the next morning, and sat on the side of her bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. For a second she forgot that the man she had been harboring a crush on for so many years was on the other side of the wall. Letting her feet touch the floor she looked over at the clock next to her bed and saw that it was well after 10. She wasn't surprised, considering the fact that she didn't sleep well the night before. Too many thoughts of Finn running through her mind made it ultimately impossible for her to sleep. She reached for her house coat and stopped for a moment. Considering the fact that Kurt would be back by now, and even if by some chance he wasn't, Carole, Burt and Finn should be up and moving around the apartment but yet it was silent. Eerily so. She wrinkled her brow and walked towards her bedroom door and pulled it open.
She stepped into the living room and her eyes instantly searched for Finn and what she found instead made her heart crumble. There on the couch were the blanket, sheet and pillow all folded nicely. She walked as fast as she could towards the kitchen and felt sick to her stomach when she found it empty as well.
"No." She said to no one but herself. "He wouldn't have just left. Not without saying goodbye." She tried to tell herself. "Maybe they went for breakfast…or coffee..or to sight see." She ran back to her bedroom to grab her cellphone and that's when she saw it. On her dresser there was a piece of paper folded up, next to her phone. She knew the handwriting wasn't Kurt's and she didn't see any reason for his parents to leave her a note so that meant it could only be from one person.
Her hands trembled as she unfolded the neatly creased paper. She had tears already threatening to fall before she could read the first sentence.
Rachel,
I debated on waking you up to say good bye, but I forced myself to respect what you told me last night. I guess the only way that I would be able to leave this morning was if I didn't have to face you and physically say these words, so instead I took this approach. Simply because I couldn't leave without saying them.
Rachel back when I first met you, it was special. It was so special that it seemed like every day, at one point or another, you came into mind and when you did….I smiled. Something about that day changed me. It changed me because I told myself that I wouldn't just settle. I wouldn't stop until I found someone that could make me feel the way you did that night. The sweaty palms. The racing heart. The butterflies so big they felt like b-52 BOMBER planes in my stomach. And now… the person I end up with has an even tougher task to achieve. And that is to make me see fireworks the way I did when I kissed you last night.
Rachel felt her breath catch. He had seen the fireworks too. It felt as if her wrote down HER feelings on this paper. As if there were some way for him to read her mind and know exactly what SHE felt. She had to wipe away the tears in order to keep reading.
Rachel you are an amazing woman. You have the power to take my breath away with just one smile. The way your eyes slightly slant when you smile so bright it touches your eyes. How you fiddle with that ring on your thumb when you're nervous is adorable. And your cheeks turn the lightest pink when you are embarrassed or feeling shy about something is a memory that is now permanatley burned into my mind. So although I cannot have you, I DO have something that not even you can make me lose. And that is the short but meaningful memories of you.
I wish I could have convinced you otherwise about us. Mostly because I know in the deepest part of my soul that what we share is the potential to be something magical. Something you only read about in fairytale books. It's like your snow white and I'm prince charming. Their struggle to be together was long and hard, but so…so..worth it in the end. Maybe one day, you'll believe in fairytales too. And when that day comes… you know where I will be. I can't promise that I will wait forever, because a promise like that is a bold lie. One that isn't humanly possible considering no one knows what the future has in store. But I will tell you this. If you ever change your mind, contact me. Contact me no matter what because you don't know how I am feeling at that time and I just might surprise you.
Well I better end this, my mom and dad are impatiently waiting to take me to the airport. Kurt is still at his boyfriends I believe, so please tell him that I am sorry I had to go, but I will visit again as soon as I can. OH and tell him that airplanes do travel in BOTH directions. Take care of yourself Rachel Berry. I know you are going to make someone one hell of a luck man one day. And I will envy him always.
Always,
Finn
Rachel didn't even realize that she had sat down while reading the letter and she was full out crying by this point. She didn't even hear the front door open, nor did she hear Kurt enter her room.
"Rachel? Oh my God, are you ok? What's wrong babe?" Kurt asked as he rushed to his best friends side full of worry. "Why are you crying? Talk to me." He pressed.
Rachel just shook her head, the sobs shaking her body.
"I can't say it out loud because I will sound like a complete idiot." She said between tears.
"There is nothing you can say to make me think you're an idiot. You're my best friend so we get these special passes that say we can be complete idiots in front of one another and never be judged. So spill." He nudged her with his shoulder and she gave a weak smile.
"He's gone." She managed to get out and Kurt furrowed his brow.
"Gone? Uh, I need a little more than that dear. I don't know who is gone."
"Finn. He..he's gone. He's flying back to Ohio probably as we speak." She said and still Kurt was confused.
"Rachel, you knew he was leaving this morning. Why are you so upset about that?" Kurt knew there was much more to the story. He could tell just by the way his best friend and brother had told the story the day before about how they had promised to reenact their first date, but he didn't know Rachel would be THIS upset about not being able to.
"He wanted to stay. For his break. He wanted to stay and spend time with me and I told him to go. I am such an idiot."
Kurt lifted his head quickly at her words. He missed his brother and Rachel knew that, so he didn't understand why if she like him, and she knew HE missed Finn, why she would tell Finn to go back.
"Why did you tell him to leave? Oh my God Rachel, he could have spent an entire week here and you know how much I have missed him. You need to explain to me why I shouldn't pick up my phone and stop him before he leaves and I don't see him again for another year or longer."
"Because he wanted to stay for me. To stay and see what would happen between the two of us. But I couldn't let him stay and us have this amazing week and end up falling head over heals for him. Because your brother is oh so easy to fall for."
"Wait. You told him to LEAVE because in short, he is the perfect man and you would fall for him? Whoa Rachel. That's crazy. Who wants any of THAT?" Kurt said, waving his hands up in the air in surrender.
Rachel rolled her eyes, wiping away a few loose strands of hair that had fallen into her face.
"No Kurt. You don't understand. I know that if he would have stayed, then by the end of the week I would have like him that much more and it would have been excrutiating to watch him leave, knowing that it would be entirely too long before I would be able to see him again. We both know that long distance relationships don't work. You have said that yourself."
"I know I have. But I was talking about ME. Just because I might not believe in long distance relationships, doesn't mean that it doesn't ever work for ANYONE. Look at all the married couples that have a loved one over seas. I mean they only communicate through letters, emails…maybe if they are lucky, a skype session here and there. And they make it work. They go a year at a time apart and their love doesn't just go away. Anything worth having is worth fighting for Rach." Kurt said, reaching over and placing his hand on Rachel's, causing her to look up at him. All she saw was truth in his eyes and it made her want to cry even more.
"What do I do now? I sent him away." She said, but before she could get an answer, she heard the door to their apartment open. She looked at Kurt with a confused look.
They both stood up and started to walk towards the living room to find out who their visitor was when Rachel walked smack dab into none other than Finn.
"Oh my God." She said, looking up stunned. "You're here? You said…your note." She began but he placed a finger on her lips to stop her questions.
"I know what you told me Rach. And I will respect that, if that's what you truly want. But I want to spend as much time with you as I can this week. I couldn't get on that plane. Hell I couldn't even make it all the way to the airport without having my dad turn around. If all I get with you is this week and nothing more, I will enjoy this week and then walk away if that's what you really want. But I don't want to miss out on something that could be amazing just because it wouldn't be easy."
Rachel was once again crying. But this time she was crying for a whole other reason. She was so amazed by this sweet, sweet man standing in front of her. She had never had anyone do anything even close to this for her and she had to admit that it felt great.
"I don't want to miss out on it either. I think we should spend this week together and then see what happens. We can discuss more about this when the end of the week comes. I am so happy you didn't get on that plane." She said honestly before stepping forward and wrapping her arms around his waist.
"I love that plan." Finn said, tightening his arms around her tiny body.
"Ok you two. We are still here for one more night, so you have to share each other for a little longer. Who's up for game night?" Carole said to the group and everyone smiled.
"Sounds like you should get ready to get beat mom." Finn said with a wink, never taking his arm from around Rachel who now stood next to him.
That night the little family and Rachel played a very intense game of Monopoly which a very proud Kurt won. He didn't fail to let everyone know just how amazing he was and how horrible they are. But all in all, everyone really enjoyed themselves. Rachel and Finn sat next to one another and ever so often one of them would touch the others arm, or hand and they would share a smile that made Kurt make gagging noises until Finn threw an empty water bottle at him.
"Well kiddos, we had a great night, but we have to call it a night. We have an early flight tomorrow so these old folks are going to head off to bed." Carole said, walking over to hug both of her sons as well as Rachel.
Kurt disappeared to his room to shower before heading out to meet Blaine and quickly disappeared only moments after being dressed and ready to go. He told both his brother and best friend not to wait up for him which most likely meant he wouldn't be home and Finn had to tease him about it before allowing him to leave.
Once the game was put back into the hall closet, Rachel walked over to where Finn was sitting on the couch and took a seat next to him. Finn was flipping through channels on the television until he felt Rachel sit down, then the tv became a distant memory.
"So, tonight was a lot of fun." Rachel said, reaching over and playing with the hair on the back of Finn's neck.
"Yeah it was. My parents really like you. Especially my mom. And that really says something because most of the time my step dad is pretty guarded with who he get's close to. He just tries to look out for me and Kurt, ya know?" Finn said, his hand softly sitting on top of Rachel's thigh.
"They are great people. I can see how you and Kurt turned out to be such amazing men."
Silence took over the room and both sat there simply enjoying the others company. Rachel was the first to speak and break the silence.
"I know that this week is all we have right now, but I really do want to get to know you as much as I possibly can. I don't know what the future holds, and we can't expect anything from this, but even if this week is all we get… I will take it." She placed her hand on top of the one on her leg and laced their fingers together before looking up and into Finn's amber colored eyes.
"So will I. And I can't think of much other than spending time with you, but right now… something else is taking over my every thought."
Rachel cocked her head to the side in question. "Oh yeah? What's that?" She asked but instead of getting an answer, she felt Finn's large hand reach around and grab the back of her head, pulling her towards him.
"Kissing you." He whispered against her lips before pressing his against hers.
Their kiss grew stronger by the minute and Rachel couldn't tell you when it happened, but at some point she ended up straddling his lap and their soft kiss had turned into a full blown make out. Finn's hands moved down her back and pulled her as close as physically possible against his chest. His arousal was evident as Rachel pressed down against him and caused her to catch her breath.
They pulled apart for a second, their foreheads still touching and Rachel breathed out, "What are you doing to me?"
"I could ask you the same thing." Finn said, wanting to kiss her again but when he leaned forward, Rachel pulled back as to look into his eyes.
"I know this is all backwards, but I don't even care. I have always lived my life by the book. Following all the rules and doing what was expected of me. But with you… none of that matters. I just want to enjoy every minute with you as if it were our last. Come with me." She said, climbing off his lap and reaching for his hand.
Finn looked up at her, wondering where she was taking him.
"Ok." He said, standing up as Rachel led them through the living room and stopped at her bedroom door.
"Rachel… we don't have to do—" He began, not wanting her to think that he expected anything to happen. "I don't want you to think that this is all I want. Because as badly as I want you right now.. and trust me.. I REALLY do, you're so much more special than that."
Rachel pulled him down towards her, kissing his lips once again. She looked up at him when they parted and said, "I know that. And that makes me want you that much more. And like I said, I am throwing all the rules out the window. Being with you feels right, and I'm just going to go with it."
That was the last thing she said before opening her door and pulling him inside behind her. The door was shut, locked and their lips collided in a much hungrier kiss than before. Rachel knew that this could go one of two ways. She could manage to end up with her happy ending somehow, or it could blow up in her face and leave her with nothing but a broken heart but it was a gamble she was more than willing to take. Something about the way she felt for this man told her the risks, no matter how steep, were worth it. Rachel Berry was no longer going to follow the rules. She was going to write her own.