I looked around quickly.

How did I get here?

This place felt so familiar... Had I been here before? Yes, yes I had. It was the alley I had been attacked in. I remembered the darkness and the musty air that was trapped between the tall cement walls. It was silent, not even the sounds of the city could reach me here.

I flipped around to the exit, the light from the street seeming to move farther and farther away. I reached out towards it, grasping at the air, wondering why my feet wouldn't move.

He was coming.

Both fear and exhilaration ran through me. My attacker would be here soon, to try and kill me, but that also meant that Raphael would come soon too, to rescue me. I waited, my feet still glued in place, my heart beat speeding up with each passing second. I was a sitting prey, no way or ability to keep myself safe. All I had was the hope that my red-masked guardian would get here soon.

I heard the footsteps approaching before I saw him... It was the same man who had cornered me before. I swallowed hard, having a hard time staying brave as I had the first time. He came up to me slowly, and I still couldn't move. I opened my mouth to scream, but no sounds came.

This time the man didn't have a gun. No, this time he had a sharp knife. I couldn't see it, not in the thick darkness, but I just knew... I knew this time a quick, painless shot would not be my death - no, this time it would be slow and deliberate.

I sank down to the ground, burying my head in my hands, shaking violently.

This was a dream, right?

I began screaming at myself inside of my head, ordering myself to wake up. I couldn't give in to the fear. Soon I would wake up and find that I was home, safe, and in my own bed.

I looked up at the man just in time to see a shadow grow from behind him.

Raphael.

I smiled, all of my fears washing away instantly. He had come for me.

Once more, the scene of Raphael defeating the man played out. One punch, two punch, three punch, and I was saved.

Now, my feet decided that they would work again, and I ran to him. Unlike last time, I knew what to expect when I got closer. I no longer was surprised by his green skin or shell. Now they were a comforting sight, one that I craved.

I threw my arms around his neck, having to stand on my toes to reach all the way around, and I breathed in the smell of his skin.

"I knew you'd come." I murmured happily, pulling back and looking into his eyes.

There was no doubt in my mind, nothing holding me back from how I felt. Here in Dreamland, there was no worries about him being a mutant and me being a human. There was no right or wrong. There was no uncertainty. Here, I was free to explore my growing feelings for Raphael.

I knew next to nothing about him. He'd never shared his personal thoughts with me. I only had a few things to go off of, a few details I had gathered throughout our conversations. But, at least here in my dream, I had hope that I would discover more about him. I had hope that he would tear down all the walls he had built around himself.

I had hope that I could tear down my own walls, as well.

He was still staring back at me, seeming more human than he ever had before. His hands were on my hips, grasping me tightly in place before him.

Here in Dreamland, I could do anything I wanted. And so, I kissed him.

A loud knocking sound awoke me from my deep slumber. I sat up slowly, still groggy, my eyesight blurred. It took a moment for me to realize that the sound wasn't coming from my front door, but from my window. I climbed out of bed and pushed aside the curtains, expecting to see Raphael or Mikey. However, I didn't see an orange or red mask. I didn't see purple either. Instead, it was Leonardo, the last turtle I would have ever thought to see, outside. I unlatched the lock and pushed the pane up.

"Thank you." He said as he climbed into my room.

"Uh, sure." I replied, turning on my bedside light.

"I'm sorry to have woken you." Leonardo said, nodding towards the mess of blankets. "But I had to wait until it was late before I could risk sneaking out."

"Is everything okay?" I asked quickly, wondering what could have possibly made Leonardo, the oldest and most responsible brother, break Splinter's rule.

"Yes." He answered, although his face still looked troubled. "I just have something I need to discuss with you."

"This sounds like something I should be sitting for," I joked. "Lets go to the living room."

He followed me to my couch and we took a seat next to each other, both seeming uncomfortable. Even though Raphael always appeared to be keeping me at an arms length away, I never felt weird being around him. But Leonardo... Our few times talking hadn't exactly been warm and fuzzy. Unlike Mikey and Donatello, he didn't seem to have any interest in making me feel welcome in their home.

"Donnie had a break though today," Leonardo began slowly. "After each time that we have fought the Foot Clan, once we get home he goes through the security cameras throughout the city and tries to track them. Usually, we loose them when they either leave the city or pass by a street without a camera on it. But today, he was going through the footage after our ambush, and he was able to follow them."

"To where?" I gasped. "Some place in the city?"

He nodded. "A building right down town. It's not a business. It doesn't pull up anything on the internet either. But, we have to assume it is a place of importance for the Foot Clan if that is where they went there right after they lost us."

"Well, isn't that good news?" I asked. "Now you can keep tracking them."

"It is," Leonardo agreed. "But we need more access. Being able to see when they come and go is helpful, and so is the possibility of being able to track where they are going to... We need more than that though. We can't do anything being stuck in the sewers... if we were able to hear what was going on inside of the building..." He looked up at me with his deep blue eyes.

They were a lot like Mikey's, only they didn't hold the same youthfulness, the same joy.

"You need me to get inside the building." I stated, seeing where this was going.

"Yes," Leonardo said. "Donnie has a device that if it's planted inside of the building, we'd be able to hear everything going on, and possibly even hack into their computers."

"Ah." I said, fiddling nervously with the hem of my t-shirt.

Leonardo sighed. "I know this is a lot to ask Lily, and I know that I really have no right to ask this of you. I haven't exactly been kind to you, and I am sorry for that."

"Being kind to me and trusting me are two different things. I guess I just don't understand why you're asking this of me when it seems like you don't trust me." I replied honestly.

"I didn't." He admitted. "But, I do now."

"Why?" I pressed.

"Because you don't look at us like we're monsters. The other night, when you were with Raphael in the weapon's room, I saw the way you looked at him. I can see that you really care about my family. And if you can't do this for me, then please, at least do it for Raph beca-"

"Leonardo." I said firmly, putting my hand lightly on his arm. "I understand. I would be happy to help in any way that I can."

"Thank you." Leonardo said, sounding relieved, and giving me a genuine smile.

"So..." I continued. "I uh, kinda brought up helping you guys to Raphael and he didn't take it so well. I'm assuming you didn't tell him you were coming here to talk to me... Are you planning to keep my involvement a secret?"

"I wasn't aware that he was against the idea of you helping us... though I should have assumed he would be. I didn't tell him about me coming here tonight because I wasn't sure you would agree to help us. Only Donnie knows about this plan." Leonardo explained.

"Will you be telling the others?"

"As much as I hate to do it, keeping this from Splinter might be best. That rules out telling Mikey, because he can't keep a secret to save his life. I had planned on telling Raph, but if you think it would be unwise, I won't."

I sighed. "I hate to keep something like this from him. But I'm not sure I see another way."

Leonardo nodded solemnly. "Then it will stay between the three of us until the time is right to tell everyone."

He put his hand on top of mine that was still resting on his arm. I'd forgotten it was there.

"Thank you again, Lily."

"Of course." I replied, giving him a reassuring smile. "Do you have the device with you? I think I already have an idea of how to get inside. And where exactly should it go?"

Leonardo pulled something small and black out of a pocket on one of the straps that were pulled across his chest.

"The rooftop would be ideal, but at the very least on the highest floor possible. It is already turned on and it has an adhesive on one side. Just pull this strip off and attach it some place out of sight."

He handed me the device after he was done showing me what to do.

"Simple enough." I replied. "I'll try to get it done tomorrow."

"I need to get back." Leonardo said, standing up. "Just... Be careful."

"Don't worry about me." I said, walking him back to the window. "I'll be fine."

"I'll text you the address in the morning." He added, before giving me a final nod and disappearing into the night.

I locked up and then I went to sit on the edge of my bed, the sinking feeling in my stomach making me want to cry.

I wasn't scared or worried about my task. I knew I would be able to find a way to do this for them. I was more concerned about Raphael's reaction when he found out me getting involved... about me going behind his back and lying to him. There was nothing I wanted to do less than be dishonest with him, but I knew better than to tell him about this. He would either rat me out to Splinter or kill Leonardo. Or both. No, I'd have to lie. Maybe once I'd done this task and Donatello found useful information he would be able to handle hearing the truth - he'd see that I hadn't gotten hurt and that I'd been helpful. That was my only hope.

I laid back down and turned off the light. I rolled onto my side and stared at the device that was now sitting on my bedside table. My dream began to replay itself in my mind, and I longed to be in that world: the place where I could honest with myself, with Raphael, about the feelings growing inside of me.

But, in Dreamland the truth would have to remain. I flipped to my other side and forced my eyes shut.

Tomorrow would be a very long day.