A/N: I forgot to upload this earlier, I'm sorry! But thank you for the reviews! :D
The newly appointed clone army was still doing mop up on Geonosis, scouring the endless Geonosian tunnel systems for any scraps of information the separatists might have left behind. So far their searches had turned up nothing but mild to severe injuries inflicted by everything from tunnel cave-ins to unfortunate encounters with Merdeths. As such, the medical frigate orbiting the planet was being kept there for the foreseeable future and while it did possess a regular shuttle schedule which ferried its patients to and from the frigate, Obi-Wan had been given permission to chauffer one patient in particular, personally.
There was a service station and several medical droids positioned just beyond the entrance of the bay and he approached it, wrapping his cloak tighter around himself. Docking bays were always so much colder than any other part of a ship – the cost of being separated from the freezing vacuum of space by nothing more than a force field, no doubt.
"Obi-Wan Kenobi," Obi-Wan said to a feminine droid, leaning slightly against the frame of the desk. "I'm here to sign for the release of Anakin Skywalker."
She spent several long seconds typing something into a holocomputer, then spoke in a metallic voice. "Release confirmed. Patient one-three-four-three is being held in room six-zero-two on deck twelve. Please follow the blue line."
A dimly lit line flickered to life against the white floor of the frigate, winding down the hallway and around a sharp corner. "Thank you, I know the way." Obi-Wan followed it regardless.
When he arrived at Anakin's room, his padawan was already dressed, sitting on the edge of his medical bed looking halfway between depressed and intrigued as he inspected his new arm, a frankly primitive looking prosthetic that was probably exactly what Anakin had wanted.
"How does it feel?" Obi-Wan asked, and Anakin's head snapped up. "I've heard those synthnet neural interfaces can take some getting used to."
Anakin's mouth quirked upward and he shook his head. "Nah, feels fine. I may have… persuaded the medical droids to let me make some special modifications."
"Of course you did." Obi-Wan said. "So," he sat down beside Anakin who seemed to be attempting to physically drown himself in melancholic force energy. It was almost as though he had forgotten how to shield his emotions entirely. On Geonosis, Obi-Wan had caught a sense of similar distress from Anakin, but had more or less chocked it up to their impending deaths. Now he suspected something else might be at play. "If you're so pleased with your new arm why do I get the feeling you've been haunting this room like some sort of ghastly forlorn spirit for the past week and a half?"
His subtle taunt did the trick and Anakin looked appropriately offended. "First of all, I haven't been. And second of all..," he drew back, glanced at his arm and at several other objects around the room, then said. "It's nothing," Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow and Anakin sighed at him. "I'll tell you when we get off this ship."
In an act of utter kindness, Obi-Wan decided to let the subject go for now and stood up. There were other things to be discussed anyway. "I'll hold you to that," he said. "Are you ready to go, then?"
Anakin spread his arms and said with a self-deprecating smile that looked foreign on him, "I've got nothing to pack."
Obi-Wan feared that something was indeed dreadfully wrong with Anakin because he refrained from speaking so much as a single word during their walk back to the docking bay, and when Obi-Wan signed for his four day early release from the frigate, he was downright cordial with the medical droid who had insisted on reading off a long list of exercises, medications, and signs and symptoms to watch for regarding Anakin's injury. In all of their many long years together, Obi-Wan couldn't think of a single time during which Anakin had tolerated the fussing of medical droids or personnel, a trait which Obi-Wan supposed Anakin had learned from him.
Suffice it to say, Obi-Wan was greatly unnerved.
As usual, once they were aboard Obi-Wan's requisitioned transport shuttle, Anakin made his way immediately to the cockpit. "Where to?"
"We'll be heading back to Coruscant for a short time," Obi-Wan called from the cabin, scrolling through Anakin's most recent medical record on a datapad. Apparently, Anakin had been quite amicable during his stay on the frigate. The medical officer who had overseen the installation of Anakin's arm had even gone so far as to write down in his report that Anakin had "asked politely" to modify his bionic limb and had "willingly filled out the necessary paper work".
Obi-Wan hummed and wondered for a brief moment if Anakin had been replaced by some kind of separatist aligned clone, because the padawan he knew had never once in his entire life dealt willingly with any form of paperwork.
The ship gave a small jolt and seconds later Anakin came wandering back into the cabin area. "Nav computer's set and we're in hyperdrive. Shouldn't be more than a few hours till we reach Coruscant."
"Good," Obi-Wan set down the data pad and patted the seat next to him. "Sit, I have some news I think you'd be interested in hearing."
Anakin raised an eyebrow and did as he was told. "Good news or bad news?"
"Good news at a price," Obi-Wan said and ignored the skeptical noise Anakin made in response. "As you know, many Jedi were killed in on Geonosis, some of them members of the Council." Anakin averted his gaze and nodded heavily. "With the emergence of galactic war on our hands, the Senate has put a lot of pressure on the Council to fill those seats, and so, while nothing has yet been made publically official, I've been promoted to the rank of Jedi Master and given a seat on the Council."
Anakin smiled. "That's – that's great, Master. You deserve it."
"There is more, Anakin," Obi-wan said, and Anakin's head jerked up. "In light of your bravery on Geonosis, and your sacrifice," Obi-Wan gestured to Anakin's prosthetic arm. "The Council has seen to fit to place upon you the rank of Jedi Knight. You will be named a general in the Republic army and given your own battalion to command. There are ceremonies to attend, of course, for both of us – but you are, as of this day, no longer my padawan learner."
Anakin blinked. "Master…" He lowered his head. Obi-Wan assumed his silence had more to do with shock than humbleness but, for perhaps the first time, he couldn't be sure. The small cabin compartment of their transport felt muted. For whatever reason, Anakin was actually managing to completely block his feelings from Obi-Wan. Eventually, he said quietly, "I don't deserve this."
"What are you talking about, Anakin?" Obi-Wan said, frowning. "Of course you do! You faced great trials on Geonosis. You saved my life."
"No." Anakin shook his head and leaned forward, elbows on his thighs, hands clasped.
"What's wrong? I thought you'd be overjoyed at the Council's decision."
Softly, Anakin said, "I've done something terrible, Obi-Wan," And he buried both of his hands in his hair. "Please, you have to forgive me…"
Something cold crawled down Obi-Wan's spine and he said, a little bit less kindly than he intended, "What have you done, Anakin?"
"I have broken my vows to the Jedi Order."
"What-,"
"Padme and I have lain together, and I love her."
Obi-Wan gazed at the blinking panel behind Anakin's head, running endless diagnostics on the ships engines and life support systems. That was something of an issue, but knowing Anakin, not entirely surprising. "Anakin…"
"It's worse," Anakin said, voice suddenly loud and wet. "I've ignored your training, I acted upon my anger, I-I've murdered innocents…"
Obi-Wan was silent. He watched Anakin's fingers shake, gripping the short strands of hair on his head. "I think you'd better tell me what happened, Anakin. And when."
"They took my mother."
"Who?" Obi-Wan asked, wishing he didn't already know where this was going.
"The sand people."
"I assume you mounted a rescue."
Anakin lifted his head and met Obi-Wan with a fierce, reddened gaze but only for a moment. Then he pressed his trembling lips together and looked away, thick, wet lashes casting shadow over his normally bright eyes. "I saved her, and then I killed them. All of them."
After a moment of silence, Obi-Wan said. "The Tuskens…"
Anakin's head bobbed up and down and a whispered sob snuck its way out of his mouth. "What have I done?" He sucked in a breath and sat up, staring at the ceiling of the cruiser. Obi-Wan closed his eyes. "I slaughtered them…," Anakin said, voice shuddering. "The men, the women… Obi-Wan I murdered children." he seemed to wither at saying this out loud. Even in the force, Obi-Wan felt Anakin's presence quivering as though it might shatter if pressed. "What do I do, Master?" For a moment Obi-Wan let himself forget the circumstance of this conversation. He watched Anakin staring at him as though Obi-Wan were his last, final hope in all the galaxy - as though Obi-Wan, of all people, could somehow fix this for him, and he wondered how someone with such pure eyes, like glass spun from a storm cloud, could possibly have done something so terrible. When Obi-Wan didn't say anything, couldn't say anything, Anakin tore his gaze away and said, "How can I still be a Jedi after what I've done?"
"The council's decision is made," Obi-Wan said. "But if you confess these crimes to them… they will revoke it."
"Is that… what I should do?"
Obi-Wan sighed. "I don't know, Anakin."
"Please, Master, you have to tell me! Tell me what to do and I'll do it. Anything that you ask!"
"This is not my choice to make," Obi-Wan stood. "And I am no longer your master, nor can I give you forgiveness for crimes that you have committed against someone else."
Anakin groaned and it subsided into a quiet whimper. He leaned against the wall of the cabin and simply shook pathetically and silently and Obi-Wan felt a hurt deep inside of his chest, which he would have recognized if he weren't such a fool. Instead, he thought of Qui-Gon and of the prophecy. He thought that if he let this stupid, idiot boy throw his life away because of some barbaric mistake, it might be the galaxy that pays for it in the end.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan said and received no response. "Anakin, look at me."
Slowly, Anakin turned his head, eyes swollen, lips red and puffed out like a Rodian. Honestly, he was a gruesome sight.
With a sigh, Obi-Wan said, "I am no longer your Master, and as such, I cannot tell you which course of action you should take to make amends for what you've done. The decision must be yours." Anakin looked unimpressed. Or as unimpressed as a desperate, grieving person drowning in guilt could look. "But as your friend, I will say this: If you confess to the Council you will be stripped of your rank and released from the order at best. At worst, you could be imprisoned. Either way, you will be helping no one but yourself in some foolish attempt to assuage your own guilt. If you truly do regret what you've done, you'll accept the Council's Knighting, and you will do everything in your power to address whatever darkness inside of you drove you to this madness and dispel it."
"I don't know if I know how," Anakin whispered. "I don't know if I can."
"You'll figure it out," Obi-Wan said. "And I will help you." He extended a hand which Anakin stared at. "Now get up. There will be ceremonies to attend when we arrive and it won't be good for public moral if you show up looking like a drowned womp rat."
Out of something like habit Anakin put his hand in Obi-Wan's but made no motion to stand and so they simply sat there, the both of them looking like fools for several moments until Anakin moved forward in one swift motion and wrapped himself around Obi-Wan like some desperate, touch starved creature. As it had been some years since Anakin impulsively hugged Obi-Wan (the last time being after a particularly trying mission from which Obi-Wan nearly didn't return when Anakin was eleven and about as tall as Obi-Wan's elbow), he found himself rather surprised by how greatly Anakin loomed over him, even while sitting.
"Honestly…," Obi-Wan said but rested a comforting hand on Anakin's broad back, none-the-less, patting it comfortingly.
Possibly the hardest thing Obi-Wan had ever done as a Master was get Anakin to move out of their shared unit and into his own apartment in the temple. Not for any sentimental reason, (although now that Anakin was gone, Obi-Wan found himself mysteriously confused when he would occasionally forget that he lived alone upon coming home to empty quarters) but rather because Obi-Wan had never realized how many of the things in their apartment belonged to Anakin, or so Anakin claimed: almost all of them.
By the time they had moved his many, auspicious boxes down the lengthy hall of the temple's private quarters and into Anakin's new apartment, Obi-Wan was left with little more than a bed, a nightstand, and one particularly ugly potted plant which Obi-Wan only owned now because Anakin had refused to take it with him. On the whole, he supposed he should be thankful that Anakin left him with silverware considering that he had brazenly attempted to steal the Corellian plates in their kitchen which had been a gift from an old Jedi master – a dear friend of Qui-Gon's – given to him years before Anakin had even come to the temple, and that Anakin had pouted endlessly after being told that the plates belonged to Obi-Wan (in-so-much as a thing could belong to a Jedi), and that if Anakin needed plateware he could requisition it from the Temple.
The entire ordeal was an awful mess, and Anakin's sour mood helped no one at all. Obi-Wan tried not to let on that he noticed, but it was difficult when Anakin moped around, packing his things like he was being sent to death row and then floating them pathetically down the hallway using the force while Obi-Wan trailed behind, praying that none of the Masters were around to see his former padawan so blatantly misusing his abilities.
Once he was finally gone things felt… peaceful, for the first few days at least. Then they began to grow somber as Obi-Wan realized just how little he might be seeing of Anakin from here on out. After all, it was extremely uncommon for a former padawan and master to be assigned on missions together. Obi-Wan might very well never see Anakin again outside of the temple and he was surprised by how severely the idea troubled him. And yet, despite this, Obi-Wan had promised Anakin that he would assist him in dealing with the consequences of his actions on Tatooine. How he was going to do this if the Council never assigned them missions together, and during a war, was beyond him.
It was this thought that plagued him when someone buzzed his door one late afternoon, several days into his 2 week leave. He very much expected to see Anakin's face on the monitor of his wall and was very much surprised to find instead, Padme.
"Come in," He said, and the door slid open allowing Padme to rush in looking rather flustered. "Senator Amidala, what a curious surprise."
"I'm sorry to have come without warning like this, Obi-Wan," Padme said, scanning the room like a hawk for prey. "I'm… I don't know who else to turn to…"
Obi-Wan set his cup of tea down on the small kitchen island that had served as a dining table for him and Anakin for so many years and motioned Padme into the other room and onto the single piece of furniture he had requisitioned for himself from the Temple: a wide and comfortable couch. "Please, sit down."
As a knight with a padawan, Obi-Wan had been given the luxury of a two bedroom apartment, meager by the exorbitant standards of a senator, but well above the regular single room studio that many Jedi lived in. As the council had not yet requested that he downsize after Anakin's departure from the space, Obi-Wan was somewhat guiltily enjoying the fact that he now had a living room for the first time in his life in the form of Anakin's old room.
Padme's dress pooled around her as she sat, and despite her clearly anxious expression, everything about her was, as always, perfectly in place, but when she looked at him it was with the eyes of a desperate woman. "I don't want to get Anakin in trouble," were the first words out of her mouth and Obi-Wan already knew exactly how this conversation would go, so he decided to cut it off before he was forced to suffer having it a second time.
"I already know," he said, holding his hand up as he sat next to her. "Anakin confessed to me not long after his recovery."
Padme's expression turned to confusion. "He couldn't have," she said.
"He absolutely did."
"No, I mean… he couldn't have because he doesn't know."
Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow. "He doesn't know he had sex with you?"
"He doesn't know I'm pregnant," Padme said.
For several long seconds, Obi-Wan stared at her, absolutely positive about the fact that whatever he had just heard, however stupid Anakin could occasionally be, he would not have gotten a woman, a member of the Republic Senate, pregnant.
"And the child is…"
"It's Anakin's," Padme said.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive."
Obi-Wan ran his hands over his face and muttered an old curse, unbidden, that Qui-Gon had always said when something particularly horrible happened.
"Obi-Wan… I don't know what to do… IIf I have the child and raise it myself someone is going to make the connection... they have to. I'm sure they will be called to the temple, they're going to be strong with the force. That sort of thing… it runs in families, doesn't it?"
"It can," Obi-Wan sighed. "In Anakin's family it almost assuredly will. If the council finds out that Anakin has a child he will be expelled from the order, and I'm sure you'll face repercussions as well."
For as put together as Padme looked, Obi-Wan could see her in her eyes that this was going to tear her apart. She put on a brave face, outwardly she seemed almost calm at his re-assurance of her fears. In another life, Obi-Wan thought that she may have made a good Jedi. Then Obi-Wan remembered that, of all the charming young men in the galaxy, she had decided to lay with Anakin, and he took the thought back immediately.
"Padme," Obi-Wan put a hand on her slim shoulder, so seemingly fragile and yet he remembered well the muscle that had been beneath during their time together as prisoners on Geonosis. "Is terminating the pregnancy not an option?"
She looked at him and her calm veneer broke, bringing forth unshed tears which she quickly blinked away, shaking her head.
Obi-Wan sighed. "I suppose not, then." He stroked his beard, staring out the room's single window at the bright, Coruscant sky. "You haven't told anyone else?"
"No," Padme said. "I know you love Anakin as much as I do. I couldn't trust anyone else not to turn him in."
Obi-Wan groaned at hearing this. "Jedi do not form attachments to one another, Senator."
Looking slightly mortified, Padme said, "But… you wouldn't turn him in. He was your padawan!"
"No, of course not. I'm not turning him in. If I was going to I would have already."
Padme gave him a look of skepticism which Obi-Wan did not like, and but she quickly abandoned it and said, "I need to know you are going to help me, Obi-Wan. If you can't, I will find help somewhere else."
"I will do my best, Senator," Obi-Wan said. "But I cannot guarantee you anything."
"Thank you," Padme reached for his hand and squeezed it between hers. She had an unnervingly tight grip and Obi-Wan didn't know if he should take that as desperation or a threat. "That's all I ask."
"It will take me time to come up with something," he said. "I have a few contacts who may be able to help, but regardless you should prepare yourself for the eventuality that once this is through, it is very unlikely that you will be able to keep your child."
"I know," Padme ducked her head. "As long as they're safe…"
"I will do everything in my power to assure that they are."
A shuddered sigh snuck out of Padme's mouth and she finally released his hand. "Thank you, Obi-Wan. Truly."
Obi-Wan smiled at her and stood. "Can I get you anything? Tea, water?"
"No," Padme shook her head. "I should be going. I have a meeting to attend soon."
"Very well," Obi-Wan took her hand as she rose, and walked her to the door. "Senator," he said, just before she reached for the control panel. "Do not tell Anakin."
Padme's hand hovered over the door controls for several seconds. "I-,"
"If he learns that he has a child, he will never be able to let them go. Do you understand?"
"Yes," Padme nodded, and Obi-Wan saw what he suspected was a grim smile at the corner of her lips. "I know." And before Obi-Wan could say anything else, she had left, a stifling sense of dread percolating in her wake.
